The one eye of the demon
by ravenwingcorps
Summary: First fanfic, a near death experiance when naruto is eight brings him and the kyuubi closer, the ninja world will never know what hit it. current pairings NaruXFemHakuXTemari SasuXSaku others later, although minor ones
1. The beginning

Yay, my first ever fanfic so be nice and review, tell me what you think, if you have to tell me its crap make the insult good, i like to laugh a t insults, pairing have been decided for this story, so enjoy.

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Chapter 1

The begining

As a certain blonde ninja sat on the Hokage monument, his legs dangling over the sheer drop below him, he considered how it had come to this, what he was to do.

'_Probably that day'_ he mused

*****Flashback*****

Naruto – age 8, October 10th

Pain, pain and again pain flashed through the youngsters mind after receiving yet another beating. Blood was his next thought, lots of that too.

As his vision darkened, a masked ANBU was all he saw, then darkness.

*****Naruto's mindscape*****

'_Am I dead?'_ was his first thought.

His second was _'why am I ankle deep in water?'_

Followed by a _'what is going on?'_

Followed by _'man those have got to hurt'_ as he came face to face with claws, big claws at that.

Then he saw what was attached to the other end of those claws, a monstrous fox, far larger than the boy, with nine tails and demonic crimson eyes

'_**Finally you come, young one'**_

Stunned silence met the demonic growl, pin-drop kind of silence.

"And you are?" was the hesitant reply.

Laughter filled the sewer-like room, a demonic laugh, amused demonic laughter.

'_**I believe that in your world I am known as Kyuubi'**_

A fainting blond was the response to this statement.

'_**Perhaps I should have eased him into this one'**__,_ mused the demon. _**'It was amusing though',**_ as the boy hit the ground

*****Real world*****

Naruto's apartment, a day later, October 11th

Light met the youngster's eyes as he slowly awoke.

"Huh..? Where am I..?"

"Back home," was the reply. The warm kind face of the Third Hokage met the young blonde's eyes.

"Owwww" groaned the blond, _'Sitting up, very bad idea'_ he thought, as soon as coherent thought was possible.

"Easy there," warned the old man, "It's only been five hours since you were attacked, even you can't have healed that fast, a day at the least, it was quite bad this time."

A sigh met the end of the statement, before a smile came to the boy's face, "No class for me then, huh?"

_**I can have you healed in an hour**_

Naruto paled.

"Perhaps you best rest some more" frowned the old man

"Yeah, will do, old man" the boys voice had a slight waver to it.

"Well then I best get back to my work…" said the old Hokage as he left the youngster. What he had left him to... that would remain a mystery. _'For the boy's mask to have cracked that badly, whatever it was it has got to be bad.'_

'_Healed in an hour'_ was all the blonde Jinchūriki could think, before his vision went black.

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Feedback please


	2. True strength

Alright so chapter 2, i wont be reavealing pairings untill they apear in the story, they should be obvious though, i get to the point most of the time

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Chapter 2

True strength

*****Present Time*****

Naruto made his way down from the Hokage monument, still lost in thought.

'_That was when I first started becoming stronger. I never showed it though; I always let people think I was weak, aside from that one time, it was an accident though, that event was the catalyst to everything.'_

*****Flashback*****

_After the first Genin Exam at the academy._

As he sat on the swing emotions swirled through Naruto, for the third time in a row he had failed the exam.

'_Why, why can't I do it?_' anger at his own inability raged through the Jinchūriki.

'_**Simple, you simply have too much chakra; it leaves you unable to do basic jutsu, which means you need more advanced forms of the jutsu.'**_ replied Kyuubi.

'_Huh, is that bad or good?'_ asked the blonde

'_**In terms of the simpler jutsu, bad. However, for more complicated jutsu, decidedly good.' **_

'_Ohh'_

'_**In terms of oni Jutsu for example, fantastic. You should have just let loose with oni kaze and be done with it.'**_

Naruto's ear twitched as he heard someone approach.

'_Ninja, Chunin._' The thought came to his head as he turned to meet Mizuki, a Chunin instructor at the academy.

The surprise Mizuki showed on his face told Naruto that he had been attempting to sneak up on him. "You've got good hearing I see."

"Dattebayo" came the cheerful response, he mentally cursed for the slip; demonic laughter rang in his head.

'_**At least someone found it funny,**_ _**baka'**_as more laughter rang in his head.

Ever since the incident when he was eight he had been able to talk to Kyuubi at will; Kyuubi also gave him some useful traits, heightened hearing, heightened smell, sharper sight, and an arsenal of deadly oni jutsu.

The heightened smell caused the most problems, albeit entertaining. Sakura and Ino tended to have a slightly different smell when they went near Sasuke, and in fact most people tended to smell different when around certain people. For example, Hinata smelt different when she was near him. When Naruto found a book on it during one of his nightly excursions to the library he found it hilarious, after he recovered from the nose-bleed, the nose-bleed that would start almost every time he smelt that particular smell for the next few days.

Mizuki sat on the swing next to Naruto. "You know, there is another way to become a Genin."

Naruto replied with a grin, and the words: '_This is going to be fun'_ came into his head

'_**Indeed it is'**_

_**

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**_Alright, feedback please._**  
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	3. Deciving

Alright chapter 3, this is where i reveal my main plot part, no shoot me for it i got the idea by myself i havent read a story with it in, let me know if there is one, on to the next bit.

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Chapter 3

*****Present day*****

The blonde reached the bottom of the Hokage monument and set off. Thinking to himself, _'That was the first time I deceived someone. I could tell Mizuki was trying to deceive me, which made it even better…' _

*****Flashback*****

_After the first Genin test at the academy_

Iruka spotted the blonde sat in the forest clearing with the scroll slung across his back, after landing next to Him, he knew something was wrong.

'_His right eye! Its crimson and the pupil changed to a slit! This is bad, very bad! It's just like the Kyuubi!'_

"Awww, you found me already! I only got to learn one technique… It's cool though!" Stated the Blonde young man.

Iruka's jaw suddenly found it had an engagement to the ground.

"So the demon brat actually learnt one of the Jutsu in that scroll, isn't that intriguing?" A voice came from the trees.

"I recognise that voice, Mizuki. What's going on?" shouted Iruka

Naruto just laughed, a slightly insane laugh, a laugh bordering on maniacal. Iruka shivered.

Mizuki dropped from the tree branch, two kunai went through the space he had just vacated, he saw Naruto's out stretched arm and saw the red ball of pure chakra in his hand and had time to think 'Awww hell no' , as pain wracked his body then the merciful blackness took him.

Iruka wasn't sure what he had just seen, Naruto had thrown two kunai at Mizuki before blasting him with a vicious wind that came from a red chakra ball he had held in his hand.

Mizuki blasted though several trees and was cut badly by the wind, which removed his right arm and his left lleg at the knee and right foot, he was unconscious before he hit the boulder that snapped his neck, killing him before the shards of flying wood sliced what remained into pieces, his insides spreading in a puddle, leaving a mess that was near impossible to be recognised as once being human.

Once Naruto let the ball of chakra fade he turned to the dumbfounded Iruka.

"Hey," said the boy

Iruka suddenly found his voice, "Na-Naruto?"

"Does that mean I can be a Genin now?" asked the blonde, seriously calm, one blue eye, one a silted red.

*****Present Day*****

People stared as he passed.

'_Surprised by the change, probably.'_

Gone was the Orange jumpsuit, replacing it was black pants with an orange streak down the right hand side, black t-shirt with an orange Konoha emblem on the front, underneath a black ankle length jacket with an orange spiral on the back and orange flames at the bottom. A black sword slung across his back, the hilt above his right shoulder, and a black short sword across the small of his back hilt on the left. He had his forehead protector on, the blue material it originally had replaced by back; a black headband covered his right eye and went round his head like a bandage.

It was his last mission that had convinced him that he had to do what he was about to; he needed time to find himself in the maelstrom that was his mind.

*****Flashback*****

_Mission to the wave, demon brothers attack_

Tazuna walked at the front, leading the way to the wave country, all team 7 knew was they were to protect him en-route and whilst he finished some job.

Sakura walked at his left, kunai in her left hand, Sasuke to the right, kunai in his right hand.

Naruto walked behind, in his new clothes, he had just bought them the day before, his teammates still looked at him with puzzled expressions, as he walked he rested his right hand on the black short sword at his hip. _'Man, I _so_ need to get me a full sized sword.'_ Naruto moaned to himself _'this short sword is cool but it doesn't have much reach.'_

'_**A wise decision, kit, though keep this one, I like It.'**_ the demon responded.

Kakashi Studied Naruto as he walked behind the team. Something had happened to him between the academy and being assigned to his team; that much he knew, Naruto Uzumaki was a puzzle he needed to work out.

'_What happened to him? The kid's changed so much from the trouble-maker I was told about… I need to keep an eye on him, he may be unstable…'_ Kakashi's train of thought was disrupted.

'_Hmmm, a puddle when it hasn't rained for days, this should be interesting, what are you hiding Tazuna.'_

Naruto, Sakura, Sasuke and Tazuna turned at the metallic noise behind them; in time to see Kakashi brutally ripped into pieces by two black clad ninjas connected by a metal chain that they had used to kill Kakashi.

Tazuna, Sasuke and Sakura just stared at the ninja shock showing on their faces, Naruto however made just one statement, "That wasn't nice, it looked like it hurt."

Several jaws hit the floor, including the black clad ninjas; Naruto smirked as he drew his sword and charged at the ninja on the right.

'_Dodged his punch, good, he caught me off guard with that comme...'_ the ninja then realised his mistake _'Wait, punch? What about his short sword?'_ The ninja noticed too late that his opponent was holding his sword backwards, and he had dodged right into the blades path. The words _'You Idiot…'_ raced through the ninjas head, shortly followed by Naruto's blade.

The other ninja jumped back, rather quickly, only for the chain attaching him to his now decapitated teammate to pull him to the ground, face first.

'_Awww hell no._' was his last thought as Naruto's sword pierced the back of his skull.

Naruto calmly pulled his sword from the dead ninja's skull and proceeded to wipe the blade on the dead ninja's clothes, before rooting through said ninja's pockets and checking their forehead protectors. He then turned his head at the sound of his teammates violently returning their breakfast at the side of the road beside a shocked Tazuna before yelling "Hey, Kakashi-sensei, you can come out now."

Kakashi appeared in the middle of the road in a swirl of leaves, his one eye showing considerable surprise. "I really didn't expect you to defeat both of them _and_ know that they hadn't actually hit me kid. How'd you know?" Kakashi asked, _'This is some kid, another difference to the god of pranks that ran amok the village for so long.'_ Naruto laughed before replying "Simple, just before they got you your chakra signature jumped into the trees. As to how I beat them, well, a normal Genin would be scared seeing their sensei dying like that, so after my response they were surprised and let their guard down, so it was easy to take them out."

"You picked all that up in such a short amount of time, I'm impressed" Kakashi once again had an unreadable expression _'So not the trouble maker I was told about by the Hokage, but something is very wrong.'_

"Nah, I started planning once I saw the puddle"

Kakashi's eyebrow once again rose "so you noticed it too."

"How could I not? it was sending chakra off in waves as big as Konoha."

Kakashi's jaw hit the floor, or would have had he not being wearing his mask. "You sensed the chakra from it?"

"Yup, I can sense chakra really well!" Naruto grinned.

Sakura, Sasuke and Tazuna staggered to the middle of the road, looking rather pale.

"First time seeing someone die huh?" asked Naruto

"Yeah" Sasuke replied, Sakura just mumbled something, Tazuna didn't do anything, he just stood there.

"You get used to it; don't worry about it, its part of being a ninja after all." Naruto said,

'_Damn, you better get over it; I'm not having two teammates who are afraid to kill.'_

'_**That would indeed be ... awkward'**_

"I take it that Isn't you're first kill then Naruto…" noted Kakashi

"Seventh and eighth" replied Naruto.

Kakashi's eyebrow rose, again, remarking "Yet this is the first time you've left the village."

Naruto's face fell "The streets of Konoha are pretty dangerous."

Sakura and Saskue looked surprised, Tazuna looked rather ill... er.

"Well that's enough of that for now, let's go on for a mile or two before we make camp, I don't think Tazuna could go on for more than that."

"Yeah" Saskue replied, Sakura mumbled, again, Tazuna was still pale.

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Feedback please, also if anyone can come up with a decent name that i can eventually call this eye thing cookie to you.


	4. Sword of despair

Chapter 4, nothing to say other than chapter 5 is written and being reveied, same with chapter 6, ill be starting 7 soon

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Chapter 4

*****Present time*****

'_That night, I said more than I should have'_

Naruto walked down the twilight lit streets of Konoha, the pale light reflecting off his blue eye.

'_That was the night I named my short sword, the night I named my first weapon, Despair.'_

_*****Flashback*****_

_At team 7's camp, night after the demon brother's attack. _

Team 7 sat round a fire a short way from the road in a clearing in the forest.

"Well first question" said Kakashi "Naruto, why did you check what the demon brothers had on them? I'm intrigued by your actions so I want to know your reasoning."

Naruto let out a small laugh. "First, to see if they had anything to ID them, which you knew so that was pointless, second, to see if they had money on ..."

"What?" yelled Sakura.

"Well... you see it's like this, I live on my own, don't have any family or any friends. The old man makes sure I get some money, but the konoha council stops him from giving me more than bare-minimum to live on, sometimes not even that. So money is something I always need, but being a ninja now I can support myself so it's more of a habit than anything else and third, to see if they had anything else. They had some poison on them but I don't like using it so I left it, but that's all they had."

Sasuke and Sakura gaped; Tazuna had already gone to bed as soon as it began to get dark.

"Logical answer" Kakashi remarked. _'Half in sync with what Hokage-sama said, only the Naruto he described wouldn't kill or check the pockets of his killed enemies.'_

"Alright then second question, you seem to have taken a liking to keeping a black headband across your right eye, why?" asked Kakashi.

Naruto sighed "I was expecting this one, I won't answer that; I'm not ready to, just yet."

"Fine, lastly..."

"Ehhh" interrupted Sakura "Why did you let him off lightly with that one, that was no answer he gave Kakashi-sensei."

It was Kakashi's turn to sigh "His reasons are his own, I was just curious." Sakura looked like she was sulking. "Now last question, although it may lead to more questions; if you have never left konoha before this, why did you already kill six people?"

Naruto's face fell at the question. "I expected this one too, the village doesn't like me. Actually they hate me, often try to kill me. It's worst on my birthday though. Something I couldn't control, and they hate me for it."

"They try to kill you? And on your birthday as well?" asked Sakura, gaping in unbelief, Saskue looked shocked as well, he kept silent.

"Sakura, do you know when Naruto's birthday is?" asked Kakashi

Sakura shook her head.

"October 10th, I was born the day the Kyuubi attacked" Stated Naruto

'_**How much are going to tell them kit?**__'_ The Kyuubi growled.

'_Only what they need to know'_

Sakura just stared; Sasuke had recomposed his face to indifference, who knew for Kakashi.

"What does that have to do with anything?" asked a puzzled Sakura

"No one knows who my parents are, not even me. I was found after the Kyuubi's attack, the old man said my name was Naruto Uzumaki, and that's all anyone knows about me. I came from nowhere after the Kyuubi died, so people think that I am the Kyuubi, and it doesn't help that I can heal from fatal wounds in seconds. Sometimes, I'm not sure myself." Naruto fell silent as Sasuke and Sakura thought it over.

'_**Too much kit, way too much'**_

Naruto stayed silent, his one blue eye looking down at the ground despair welling up in him.

'_Despair, again. That's all I seem to be able to feel lately. The depths of despair.'_

'_**A fitting name for a sword that lacks one, perhaps'**_

Naruto drew his sword, holding it, the reflection of the flames dancing off the blade, flames that reflected in his blue eye, he drew a kunai, and began to name his sword, etching his chosen name into the blade.

Sasuke and Sakura didn't notice, still lost in thought, Kakashi looked on with interest.

Naruto finished and sheathed his kunai, looking at the blade of his short sword; and what he had inscribed, the name of his weapon of choice.

"Mind if I have a look?" Naruto was broken out of his thoughts at the question from Kakashi, Sakura and Sasuke looked up as well, surprise on their faces at seeing Naruto's sword unsheathed. Looking at the fire he handed his black short sword to Kakashi. Kakashi's eye widened in shock, before regaining composure. "Hmph, a sad name for a sword, what made you pick this for a name?" Asked Kakashi.

"It's all I seem to feel nowadays." Sadness laced his voice.

Kakashi passed the sword to Sasuke, who looked at the name, eyes widening in shock before he regained control of himself as he passed the blade to Sakura, she stared at the inscribing with shock, then at Naruto with pity.

Naruto looked at Sakura, the dancing fire turning his blue eye crimson, as a red glowed underneath his black headband "Never look at me like that again." All it could be described as, and in all fairness was, demonic.

Sakura dropped the sword, the blade sinking into the ground; she stood on shaky legs and ran to her tent, tears falling from her eyes.

The glow in Naruto's right eye died, and his blue eye showed sadness and regret

"I probably shouldn't have done that, I'll apologise tomorrow."

And the blade of despair reflected the dying flames as they danced their final dance.

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Again feedback.


	5. Mission to wave

My best chapter yet, i have to thank my freind warrior of twilight who has been helping me improve my writing. **  
**

**Chapter 5**

**Mission to wave  
**

*****Present time*****

'_That night was the start of bringing us all closer as a team… yeah, that night was the start of this journey…'_

Naruto walked down the darkened streets of Konoha, holding the blade of despair, the moonlight reflecting off the inscription on the blade.

'_That night was one to remember'_

*****Flashback*****

_The day the demon attacked._

The atmosphere as team 7 broke camp was... unpleasant, Kakashi had asked (or interrogated, depends on who you ask), Tazuna about why they had ninjas after them.

Naruto was troubled _'How am I going to apologize to her..?'_

'_**Tell her the truth; it would be a brilliant laugh.'**_

'_Oh yeah, real smooth. Sorry my demonic part decided it hated you so I shouted at you so sorry about that' _Naruto thought sarcastically.

Demonic laughter answered him _**'What can I say? I hate pink.'**_

Naruto made up his mind; he walked over to where Sakura was packing her tent. She flinched as he stopped next to her and crouched. Putting his hand on her shoulder, she tensed as he said "Sorry…"

Sakura turned to him in surprise, as he continued; "I really shouldn't have said that, but I'm sick of all the looks I get. Apathy, anger, but especially pity. I just don't want you guys to start looking at me like that too."

'_**Awww, go on and shout at her, it was funny!'**_

Naruto turned and walked away, he missed seeing the smile she gave. He smelt the change in her mood and laughed. "That's better; I prefer that smile to pity any day." He laughed at her shocked reaction as he turned around. "I can smell people's emotions" he explained, giving her a knowing smile "If, you want, I can tell Sasuke how you feel when we get there, but I don't think he's noticed yet. He's pretty dense when it comes to noticing girls; he's not going to revive the Uchiha like that"

Sakura just gaped before nodding with a blush. Satisfied, Naruto turned again and walked over to Kakashi. "My problem's cleared up so I'm ready to go."

Kakashi just nodded, Sakura and Sasuke walked over once they finished getting ready, Tazuna stood cowering next to Kakashi.

"Alright, let's go, same formation as yesterday." He pulled his little book from his pouch and continued, "Lead the way Tazuna." And he began to read as they walked.

"Hey, why you reading that? Didn't this mission just get a whole lot more dangerous?" Asked Naruto.

"Because you're so good at detecting enemies, think of it as training." Naruto nodded and continued to scan the surrounding area.

'_Hehehehe, I can't believe he bought it'_ thought Kakashi

Things continued quite calmly, mostly, there was the incident where Kakashi giggled whilst reading his book, and the edgy Naruto nearly took his head off with his sword. Sakura and Sasuke found it funny, but Tazuna didn't know whether to laugh or cry '_A perverted one eyed super ninja, a dark brooding kid hell bent on revenge, a girl who gets weak at the knees looking at the silent one, and a crazy black cloaked one, who's also missing an eye, that's so jumpy he can slice your head off before he knows it's you. Why me?'_

Once Kakashi made sure that his book was in a non-cut state, he checked his head was also in one piece. After that he laughed, it had been the only non-dull moment that day.

The next day was better, or perhaps worse, depending on how you look at half a glass of water. They were walking along when Naruto felt a pulse of chakra from a nearby tree; diving forward he yelled for everyone to get down, knocking Tazuna to the floor a split-second before he became quite dead. That fate was avoided though. Looking up they saw a man stood on the hilt of a very large sword, a very sharp sword. The man was all muscle, tall, and wearing a flack vest and ninja clothes with bandages around the bottom half of his face. On his head was a hidden mist village forehead protector tilted at the side, with a slash through the mist village's symbol.

"Guard the mark! I'll take this guy!" Kakashi ordered, stepping forward as Naruto moved in front of Tazuna, Sakura to his left, Sasuke to his right. Naruto drew his sword and took his stance, right foot forward, the right side of his body slightly forward, hands on the black hilt, sword pointing forwards at a 45 degree angle, and he waited, eyes closed, reaching out with senses.

"Zabuza Momochi, the demon of the hidden mist" Stated Kakashi, '_This is going to be tough.' _

Laughter rang through the clearing. "The great copy-cat ninja, Hatake Kakashi, It is an honour!"

Kakashi just shifted his forehead protector to reveal his sharingan "I won't hold back, not against you."

Sasuke's jaw dropped "How the hell did he get the sharingan?"

"Huh, sharingan? What the hell is that?" Naruto asked as he opened his eye.

'_**You need to learn more about bloodlines kit…' **_

'_Talk and study later, fight now'_

"The sharingan is the Uchiha bloodline ability." Sasuke explained. "It can copy any Taijutsu, Ninjutsu or Genjutsu as well as read them."

"Handy, so where's yours?" Asked a very curious Naruto.

A mumble answered his question.

"Keep your secrets, I've kept my own. Right now, let's watch the fight."

'_**Nicely done kit, he is so not going to like you after this'**_

'_I hate you'_

'_**I know, glorious isn't it?' **_

'_Changed my mind, now I despise you'_

Demonic laughter rang through his head as mist rolled into the surrounding area from the river, Naruto could barely see Kakashi; with his eyes, if his vision was that bad then Kakashi was going to have a hard time.

Kakashi knew he was in trouble. _'Zabuza, Former ANBU, a master in silent killing... with this mist I can barely see a foot away, I can't see my team and the mist makes using my sharingan impossible… been a while since I've been in a situation like this.' _Then he heard the clash of metal behind him and spun around _'oh, not good'_, as the wind was knocked out of him as something hit him in the stomach. Kakashi flew backwards into a tree, the object that hit him stopping a foot or so in front of him, and that was how Kakashi saw the orange spiral on the back of a long black jacket.

Naruto had been straining every one of his senses to feel Zabuza's movements, in this mist he had to keep alert, even if he could feel Zabuza's chakra when he moved, that alone wouldn't beat him.

'_Oh hell no!'_ as Naruto felt the chakra behind him, _'His speed, it's inhuman!'_ Naruto spun round, bringing his sword around the back of his head and slashed down as he finished his 180 turn, only to hit solid metal. He saw Zabuza, his back to Tazuna, casually holding his sword horizontal in front of him, with just his right hand, quite lazily.

"That all you got kid? pathetic…"

Zabuza raised his right arm and Naruto put all his strength into forcing Zabuza's sword down, but it didn't work. _'His strength, I can't do anything, my training wasn't enough!'_ Zabuza flicked his sword, knocking Naruto off balance before pivoting on the ball of his foot and kicking Naruto in the chest; sending him flying.

Sakura was frozen in fear; rooted in her place staring at the spot where Naruto had disappeared into the mist, _'Naruto was blown away...'_ Sakura dropped to her knees from the killing intent she felt coming from behind her, she saw Sasuke drop to his knees as well; Tazuna had completely passed out, sprawled out across the ground.

"Bunch of Genin brats, that all I get to-..." Zabuza felt a fist hit his stomach and a clang as another blade locked with his, halting his movements. Kakashi stood in front of Zabuza; a kunai in his left hand locked against Zabuza's sword, his right fist impacting Zabuza's stomach.

"I'm your opponent Zabuza. Sakura, Sasuke, get back, head straight back and you should find Naruto, take Tazuna with you."

They did as he said

"So, the stage is set." Zabuza noted. "After I beat you, I'll take out the brat with the sword and kill the old man, what do you say to that?"

"Hph, you have to beat me first. But even so, Naruto won't be taken down as easily as you think. He has a fair few tricks up his sleeve."

"Then let's begin!" Laughed Zabuza, as he launched himself backwards and disengaged his sword from Kakashi's kunai. "The real fight begins now!" as he melted into the mist.

'_Not good, the mist obscures vision and dampens the hearing, I have to rely on my other senses I guess.'_

Kakashi closed his right eye and stood in a loose guard stance, waiting for the chance to strike. He felt it, Zabuza wanted to finish this in one final blow. Kakashi would have to disappoint him as whirled about, catching the two handed overhead slash on his kunai, driven to his knees from the sheer force of the blow. It was then Zabuza realised his mistake, his eyes widening as Kakashi's right arm shot out, the knife-like blow struck Zabuza in the throat, damaging his windpipe, _'He blocked my blow with one hand and went to his knees, just so he could strike with his other hand. Clever, not good enough!'_

Zabuza turned into water and hit the floor. _'Damn, a water clone! What's his game?'_

Kakashi launched into the air and he felt the blow pass his feet. He twisted in mid-air and landed behind Zabuza. Kakashi thrust his Kunai forward and felt the resistance as it entered the real Zabuza's back, who twisted to the side, avoiding any serious damage before he span around and started a relentless assault on Kakashi, Zabuza gained the pace of the fight.

Kakashi was reeling from the speed and ferocity of the blows, but he still had one card left to play at this point. He dropped his guard and let Zabuza's sword pass through his neck.

To Zabuza's surprise, Kakashi turned to water "You copy that fast!?"

Kakashi dived at Zabuza with everything he had, kunai in each hand and sharingan spinning. He knew he had to make it count; he drove Zabuza back and scored several hits to his arms and chest.

Zabuza knew it was over as he felt his back break against a tree, sword locked with Kakashi's two Kunai. But this wasn't the cause of his death, it was the sharp pain in the side of his head that killed him, and he would never know who killed him, he was dead the moment the titanium blade pierced his temple.

Naruto just stood there; hand gripping Despair, the blade had passed right through Zabuza's head. Kakashi's eye widened, "I didn't even sense you that time…"

"Of course you didn't. You were focused on fighting Zabuza. Normally, you probably would have seen me coming." Naruto withdrew the blade and wiped it on Zabuza's clothes before his body dropped to the ground. He sheathed his sword and looked around with a puzzled look in his eye. "Why hasn't the mist dissipated?"

Kakashi looked around still on guard, "Because Zabuza didn't create the mist. Someone else did…"

As Kakashi finished this sentence a figure, possibly male, approached through the mist with a hunter-nin mask in hand. Seeing Zabuza's fresh corpse, he screamed and charged, Kakashi tried to intercept the kid before realizing the extent of how much trouble he was in, _'I took too many hits from Zabuza, I can't move.'_ Kakashi sank to his knees and watched in fascination as Naruto dealt with him.

Naruto turned to the young boy charging at him, and did the last thing Kakashi or the boy expected. Removing the cloth covering his right eye, he revealed the demonic eye underneath. Kakashi gasped as the boy immediately began bleeding from his eyes, stumbled, and hit the floor, unconscious.

"Naruto, what the hell was that?" asked a stunned Kakashi before he realised that Naruto was breathing heavily. _'Must take a lot out of him, no wonder he hides it…'_

"It's a Genjutsu I can cast with the Kyuubi's power, causes the person to relive any part of their life, I can influence what kind of memory. He's seeing a good part of his life, since we want to question him later. First time I've used this, and this eye has a couple of, other tricks as well, but I need to rest after using this one. Some I can use all day long, Some I can do through the headband, this one needs direct eye contact and puts me out for a couple of hours, but he'll be trapped in the Genjutsu for a day or so." And with his explanation finished, he passed out hitting the floor with a thud, exhausted.

Once Kakashi had regained enough strength, he moved over to Naruto and covered his eye and his own before calling for Sakura and Sasuke to bring Tazuna and help.

The three came over, Tazuna staggering slightly, "It's alright, Kid's just passed out, but it was a vicious fight so he's in no condition to move. Sasuke, carry Naruto. Sakura, that kid over there, he was working with Zabuza so I want to question him. Tazuna, do you mind helping me out? I'm not so good myself, just not as bad as them two."

Sasuke just nodded and slung Naruto across his back, Sakura did the same with the boy, when she noticed something about him. "Kakashi-sensei, why does he have blood coming from his eyes?"

"No idea, let's leave questions till we get to Tazuna's house" Kakashi sealed Zabuza's sword and the boys mask into a scroll and Tazuna helped him up. The group managed to reach wave later that night, as just as Naruto returned to the land of the moving.

Kakashi was walking without help by the time they reached Tazuna's house, though Naruto still needed Sasuke's shoulder to lean on.

Tazuna welcomed them in and introduced team 7 to his daughter Tsunami. She greeted them kindly and showed them to their rooms, asking to speak to them more in the morning. As they moved the boy into a bed, Kakashi asked Naruto if the boy would wake up in the night. Sakura and Sasuke already in different rooms and asleep, Naruto replied "He might, but I really don't think so. I put enough demon chakra into it to keep you out all night sensei; so I doubt that he's strong enough to break it."

Slightly disturbed with what Naruto just suggested, Kakashi tucked the boy in, and with that, they went to bed.

Team 7 awoke to find a full breakfast ready for them, which was extremely appreciated. Fully refreshed, Kakashi had gone to "sort out the kid" as he put it, and asked Naruto to follow once he'd finished his breakfast.

Naruto quickly finished his meal and had walked up the stairs when Kakashi burst out of the room, sinking to the bottom of the wall, his nose bleeding. Curiously, Naruto peeked in the room and suffered the same fate, albeit with a smile on his face.

After hearing the first bang, Sasuke started to climb the stairs after Naruto, and rushed ahead at the second sound. At the top he found Naruto and Kakashi on the floor with heavy nose-bleeds. He briefly wondered how Kakashi could have a nosebleed through a mask, but he did nonetheless. This then led him to look in the room, and unwittingly became the third victim, and fainted between his master and team-mate, with a matching nosebleed and grin.

Hearing a second body hit the floor; Sakura sighed and left her meal. When she heard Sasuke hit the floor, however, she was all urgency. after discovering her Sensei and two team-mates sprawled on the floor with nosebleeds, she looked inside the room and, well, she developed a twitch just above her right eye, and then she balled her fists, "What the hell do you think you're doing you bunch of perverts!?" seeing no immediate response she did the only thing that seemed right.

Minutes later…

Kakashi, Sasuke and Naruto were sat on the kitchen floor, tied up back to back, looking quite badly decked, cowering before the goddess of rage before them that was Sakura. "What did you think you were doing!?" she yelled at her team.

"How was I supposed to know he was a she?" Kakashi said rather sheepishly.

Sakura was saved from replying by Naruto "On the brightside, at least now we know that Sasuke isn't gay."

Silence filled the room.

"Why the hell would you think I was gay!?" Screamed a one Mortified Uchiha.

"Well, you keep going on and on about reviving your clan, but I don't see you putting the moves on anyone. Hell, I half expected you and Sakura to get down to business on the way here, I mean come ON! She'd be more than up for it. Guess you just lack the balls"

Two and a half pairs of eyes turned to him, two of the pairs promising death, a slow painful death, one pair even contemplating castration.

'_**Oh, I loved that! Do it again, do it again!'**_

The Kyuubi's words made Naruto realise what kind of mess he was in, and fortunately for him, that was when he decided to release the clone jutsu.

"WHEN THE HELL DID HE CREATE A SHADOW CLONE!?!?" Screamed Sakura and Sasuke in unison. Kakashi, however, realised that the rope was now loosened by the removal of one body, and wisely made his escape.

Sakura, realising that she'd just lost, sighed and sat amongst the rope against Sasuke's back. After they'd calmed down, they looked at each other and blushed, before taking a walk outside, together.

Kakashi then came out from underneath the floorboards.. _'Hmm… A part demon and two teens who are very hormonal… why me???'_

An hour later found Naruto and Kakashi interrogating a very much female person on her connection with the deceased Zabuza, though they got nothing. Meanwhile Sasuke and Sakura could be found sitting at the end of the pier near Tazuna's house doing more pleasurable activities.

Eventually Kakashi and Naruto finished the interrogation and proceed to search for the said persons. Naruto found them in the middle of said pleasurable activities, who didn't even sense him come near.

"Woah, kissing already?" Said Naruto as he approached the couple, who must've jumped a clear foot in sheer shock.

Kakashi appeared behind them with a clear smirk beneath his mask. "You owe me300 yen Naruto. Come on, cough up."

"Dammit." Naruto replied, digging for his wallet. "I didn't think he'd have enough balls to get this far this fa-" He stopped, feeling the killing intent coming from the angry pair, and both Naruto and Kakashi began to sweat.

"Uh-oh" Said a rather nervous Kakashi

'_**This is good stuff, kit; I think I am going to like being around you, a lot'**_

'_Pervert'_

'_**And loving it.'**_

Sakura and Sasuke just stood and faced Naruto and Kakashi. They didn't say a word, but the message was clear: Leave this place. Do it fast, and you may live…

Naruto and Kakashi didn't have to read the situation twice. Running back to the house, Kakashi became serious and once he was sure that the new couple weren't actively seeking for their lives, He signalled for Naruto to stop and catch his breath. Between gulps of air, Kakashi spoke; "Naruto we need to talk, about something important."

Naruto just sighed, "I've been waiting for it"

"That comes afterwards; I'm not too worried about that, I just want to know, did you see Sasuke?"

"I saw two things. One, yes I did indeed see Sasuke's eyes, and two, I think before we get back we may have other news, but that is a remote possibility, especially if you have a word with them about it."

"What other news? And what would I need to talk to them about?"

"Well, if we aren't careful, then before we get back we could have news about some little pink haired dark brooding emo's running about in the near future, I can just tell."

Kakashi paled, "You're right, I'll go talk to them."

"You might not live if you talk to them now, don't worry just yet."

"None of you three managed to get the bells Naruto. I only ran because it was polite" Kakashi voice showed his nervousness; "That and it was my natural reflex."

Naruto remembered who was the stronger of the two at this point, and stepped back in line. "Anyway, I believe you wanted to talk to me about what I used on that guy-girl, don't you? And about a few other things, right?"

"Yeah." Kakashi visibly relaxed, "First off, what's with the eye?"

"That story starts on my eighth birthday; though I guess it's really the only story."

"You mean the attack by the ANBU"

Naruto was surprised and he showed it. "You know about that then. Well, after I recovered from the attack, I was told a man had killed the ANBU and had taken me to the old man, I never found out whom."

"Yeah, I know that too, though I know who brought you back"

"Really? I always wanted to thank the guy, but no one would tell me who he was because he asked it to be kept a secret."

"We'll talk to the Hokage when we get back, so, what's the rest of this story."

"Well, I've never told anyone this, though I think the old man has some idea about it. Please don't interrupt me; I'm kind of nervous about it." Naruto closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "Whilst I was out after the attack, I came face to face with Kyuubi; then I passed out in my own head. When I woke up after that attack, I heard a voice in my head telling me it could heal me in an hour, instead of days, I... I started listening to the voice after that, and I worked out quite quickly that it was Kyuubi. It taught me things, and I started to train, I got a lot stronger, faster than anyone else, but I kept holding back because I didn't want attention drawn to it… I really didn't want anyone to figure anything out… It was after that when I first killed, I was sick for days, but I got over it and now it doesn't bother me." Naruto paused for a while. "Although Kyuubi didn't just teach me how to be strong, I learned some new moves from it, though they kind of tire me out if I use them too many times in a row. "The eye kind of happened on the night I became a Genin, You know, the whole mess with Mizuki, I used one of the moves that night and killed him. He tricked me to get the forbidden scroll, I ended up learning the shadow clone move before I killed him, but my right eye ended up like the Kyuubi's eye because of it. Since then I've learned a load of Genjutsu I can do with it. Some require me to take the headband off, others don't, that's all there is to it really."

Kakashi sat there, dumbfounded, "That is one hell of a story."

"Yup, the insanity that is my life."

'_**It's so fun'**_

"Damn fur ball"

"What was that?"

"Oh, sorry, I was talking to Kyuubi."

Kakashi just sat there, "Wow"

Several hours had passed, and Kakashi, Naruto, Sakura and Sasuke were questioning Zabuza's accomplice. Who they had come to learn was named Haku, and was also not a guy.

After much talking they had convinced Haku to tell her story. Naruto listened and watched her with much interest.

"Why are you staring at me like that?" asked Haku, still visibly shaken from the death of Zabuza.

"Your past is just like mine…"

This surprised Haku "Excuse me?"

"You were hated wherever you go because of something you can't control." Answered Naruto.

"Zabuza was the only person I had in my life; he was the only one who treat me like a human being… I don't-" She Sighed "I just don't know what I'm supposed to do now…"

Naruto turned to Kakashi and grinned, "Oh great…" was all Kakashi could say.

"What? What's wrong?" asked a slightly worried Sasuke.

"I was warned about that grin by Hokage-sama" replied Kakashi.

"What about it?" Asked Sakura.

"It means trouble. Usually in the form of a cunning plan"

Naruto laughed, "I have two plans this time, not just one. The first is up to Haku." Haku looked at him quizzically, as Naruto continued: "How would you like to come with us to Konoha and become a full official ninja?"

Kakashi, Sasuke and Sakura fell to the floor; Haku looked delighted, "Really? You can do that?"

"Yup, if what you said is true, then nowhere has any record of you existing. I'm sure we could persuade the old man to let it happen."

Naruto found himself joining his team-mates on the floor as Haku threw herself at him. He could just about make out her whispered thank you, as Kakashi stared, once again dumb founded by the blonde Genin. _'I get told he's a prankster, secretly known as the Sannin of pranks by the ANBU who have had to repeatedly chase him, Then when I meet him, he's as depressing as a, well as depressing as is humanly possible but now, he's a bit of both. Is he bipolar or something?'_

"So you found a perfectly exploitable loophole. I'm impressed. What is your second little surprise?" asked a very curious Kakashi.

"Tonight, the five of us are going to get properly drunk at a pub, to celebrate!"

'_**Kit, I've just realised that I like you very much. Very very much.'**_

'_I know'_

"And just how do you plan on pulling that off?" asked a seemingly uninterested Sakura, secretly thinking _'This is gonna be awesome!!'_, while completely unaware of how much Sasuke's eyes were shining in anticipation.

"Oh that's the beauty of it, it's all legal! There happens to be a little known law that upon becoming a ninja you are officially recognized as an adult."

"Wait, so that means-" Sasuke was cut off by

"Awww YEAH! WE are going DRINKING!!" Shouted Sakura.

'_**You know, I could get to like them two.'**_

_At dinner later that night_

Tazuna had introduced team 7 and Haku to his grandson Inari, who looked at them and stayed silent, glaring at the five.

Dinner was a silent affair, Inari kept glaring at them; Naruto broke the silence, "Hey Inari, What's wrong?"

"What's wrong with you? Why do you fight Gato? You can't win against him!" He got up and ran upstairs.

"What was that about?" asked Sakura.

Tazuna then proceeded to tell the story of the hero of wave.

Naruto sighed. "Well, I guess there's only one thing to do… I'll see what I can do about Inari." With that Naruto left the room,

Haku's gaze followed him, "Why's he so kind?" Haku asked.

Kakashi answered "He's had one tough life. People see him as something that in reality he constantly fights against. He has great understanding when it comes to pain, and he saw that same pain in you as well as Inari." Haku looked at the door where Naruto had left, a thoughtful expression on her face.

Naruto slipped silently into Inari's room, Inari himself sat on his desk, crying, as he held the photo of the hero of the wave.

"You know, crying never gets you anywhere. It only makes you more depressed." Naruto considered his words for a moment, "Although sometimes that can be a good thing."

Inari turned around, hurriedly wiping his tears. "And what do you know about it?"

"All too much, your granddad told us about your dad, the hero of the wave."

"There are no such things as heroes."

"Sometimes, the greatest heroes die with their goals unfulfilled; do you know why that makes them the best heroes?" Inari looked at Naruto curiously, "The reason that they are among the greatest heroes is that they were willing to die for what they thought was right. your dad was one of those heroes, I won't let his sacrifice be in vain."

Inari had much to think about that night, which he did while Team 7 and Haku left, to go to the pub.

No one stopped the 5 ninja as they entered the pub. Haku was wearing a spare set of Naruto's pants and shirt, an orange stripe down the right leg and an orange Konoha emblem on the front, Her hunter nin mask hanging from her belt. The bartender only asked what they wanted. Several minutes later the five were sat, with several bottles of sake, Kakashi being the only one having drunk sake before, they all took their first drink, Sakura and Sasuke started coughing slightly, Naruto simply stated "I like it." Haku nodded in agreement as she took another drink, Kakashi watched, somehow he drunk the sake without taking his mask off. Naruto looked at him with surprise. "How do you that?"

Kakashi did his famous eye smile and answered by drinking more sake, through his mask.

"I have no understanding of how it is possible for you do that. Maybe I'll understand it more when I'm drunk." And with that Sasuke downed more sake.

"You know I developed it when I was drunk myself." Kakashi stated.

The rest just stared at him.

The following morning was interesting indeed. Kakashi was perfectly fine, so was Naruto, the other three had killer hangovers, and appeared to be allergic to light; Kakashi nearly had a heart attack though. Sasuke and Sakura were in the same bed, both fully clothed though. That was a relief, he gave them a much needed talking to, both were red-faced afterwards, so was Kakashi.

"Right then, today we will be training, Tazuna doesn't start building again until tomorrow so we are going training, Haku will joining us as well."

"Hai" the four replied.

Kakashi led the four into the nearby forest, the three hung-over Genin grumbling. Sakura gave Naruto an evil glare "How come you're fine?"

"Just lucky I guess!" Replied a cheerful Naruto

"An idiot never gets sick" noted Sasuke, much to the girls' amusement.

'For his first time drinking sake, it's an unbelievable recovery considering how much he drank. Either he healed off the alcohol or, if that's even possible, the Kyuubi drank it?' Mused Kakashi. "Today we will be climbing trees, using just your feet."

Three of the four looked worried. Naruto didn't. "That's easy." As he pulled off a chakra enhanced jump, to the top of a very tall tree.

Kakashi was stunned "Not what I meant Naruto, but how on earth did you do that?"

Naruto dropped from the tree, "Easy, I just put my chakra into my legs and jumped."

"I know that, but even I can't jump that high. What I meant was this." Kakashi proceed to walk up the tree.

"Cool" yelled Sakura

"This is what you will be doing today, you need to focus chakra into your feet and maintain it. too much and you will be blasted off, too little and you will fall."

The four took a running start. Haku and Sakura managed to do it first time, but Sasuke just slid down, and Naruto blasted himself through five trees on his first time. He slid down the tree and fell on his second attempt and the next twenty seven times as well. Sasuke improved but couldn't climb that high.

Naruto had several bumps and scrapes, he was laying on the ground wondering where he was going wrong, he decided to ask Kyuubi.

'_Hey, fur ball, give me a pointer or something.'_

_**Kyuubi sighed, 'Fine, before trying again put one foot against the tree and try to lift your other foot off the ground, once you can do it without blasting off it or sliding, use that level of chakra to do it.'**_

'_Thanks, why didn't you teach me this?'_

'_**Since you're able to jump it with your chakra, I never saw the point in teaching you how to climb trees. Good thing I didn't or I wouldn't get to watch you fall on your ass so much right now'**_

'_I hate you'_

'_**I bask in your hate and love it'**_

Naruto was broken out of his conversation when Sasuke kicked him in the ribs.

"You in there?" he asked

"I was thinking."

'_**Baaaaskiiing!'**_

Naruto and Sasuke proceeded to try again.

Haku stayed close to Naruto, giving help where she could, Sakura did the same with Sasuke. Kakashi stood a little ways off, _'They are going to be a fine team, even better if we manage to persuade Hokage-sama to let Haku join...'_

Eventually, Naruto and Sasuke succeeded.

The next day found the five of them at the bridge construction site. Kakashi had told them he expected Gato and his mercenaries to attack halfway through the week, when they had evaluated the ninjas and the not-ninja.

On the fated day of the expected attack it was agreed that Naruto would stay back to guard Tsunami and Inari, the others proceeded to the bridge.

_Tazuna's House_

He stood a short way from the house under the cover of some trees. Naruto reached out with his senses, confident that no one would be able to get past him.

A few hours after the others left, two sword wielding thugs approached the house.

Inari came running out of the house with a wooden stick and ran at the thugs, screaming his battle cry from the bottom of his lungs. The two thugs saw this and laughed, drawing their swords. They moved for Inari, but Naruto dived into the one on the right, knocking both thugs to the ground. He quickly dispatched the one he tackled with a stab to the heart and turned to face the other holding his sword in a guard position.

The remaining thug screamed incoherently and raised his sword; Naruto stepped forward and with a slash relieved the guy of his arm before stabbing him in heart to match his companion. "Hey Inari, you okay?" Naruto asked the stunned boy. Inari just nodded. Naruto looked at the swords; one was red with a carving of a lion on the scabbard and the word Lion inscribed on the sword, this he threw to Inari, "Keep it" Inari looked at the sword, stunned, and stammered his thanks. Naruto turned to the other sword, and he saw that it was black, bearing a carving of a fox; the word Kitsune was inscribed on the blade. Naruto smirked, and swung that blade over his shoulder, thinking to the other Kitsune _'Ironic eh.'_

'_**Indeed'**_

"Inari, I've got to head to the bridge now so look after your mom, alright?" And with that Naruto sped off towards the main battle.

He arrived at the bridge just in time, as Gato had indeed attacked. Tazuna and the workers stood behind the ninjas, Gato stood behind his mercenaries who were charging towards the ninjas.

Naruto ran to his allies and past them, drawing his new black blade, Kitsune. Later, when he had a swordsmith look at the blade; he would come to learn that it was made from a rare carbon based alloy called 'Vermicular Iron'. In addition to the black tint, the blade was strong, light, and conducted Chakra really well, an attribute his other blade, Despair, did not have.

However, he did not know this, and the only thought going through his mind as he ran was the one he voiced. "BRING IT ON!"

Haku followed him, carrying Zabuza's sword. The two of them quickly creating a vortex of death, Haku clumsily swung the huge blade, Naruto swiftly cut through flesh, both of them getting more and more accustomed to their new blades. Sakura and Kakashi charged forwards, each with a kunai, and attacked the foes that got past Naruto and Haku. Sasuke however, charged strait through melee, kunai in each hand. He charged towards Gato, Sharingan spinning as he leaped towards him. Gato felt the pain as Sasuke suddenly jumped from his chest, as the blood began spraying from his lungs, and breathing became impossible. As the gangster sank to the floor, his world turning black, the last thing he heard was the words of the boy who killed him, "_That_ is for the people of the wave."

Team 7 were leaving through the new bridge. On its side was carved the name of the five who fought to protect it, starting with Gato's killer, and ending with their sensei. Tazuna wanted the bridge to be named after Sasuke, but the Uchiha refused. However, Naruto was considering the way Sasuke fought compared to his own canine-like approach, and suggested an alternative name, one that everyone agreed upon. And that was the story of the bridge connecting the Wave to the Leaf, the Falcon Bridge.

It was an uneventful few days on the return journey, and soon the team returned and delivered their report to the Hokage. Impressed with their actions the Hokage agreed to make Haku a Genin and part of team 7. Overcome with joy, Haku ran screaming around the room for a full 5 minutes. The other Genin calmed her down, and they left together for ramen to celebrate. However, Kakashi stayed behind to deliver his report.

Before he could begin, the old man chuckled, and then spoke to Kakashi, "That boy… He has dealt with so much pain, all his life. He has every right to be full of anger and hate, like that Uchiha boy, yet every time he meets someone with the same pain he bears, less pain even, he still finds a way to help them through their pain and becomes fast friends with them."

Kakashi was surprised by the old Hokage's words '"Sir..?"

"Naruto Namika- Uzimaki. Truly, he is one remarkable kid…"

My best chapter yet, what do you think, any good, and naruto became less emo because he opened up to his teammates, just so noone shouts at me for it. review please


	6. Leaving

Not so long as chapter 5, plot chapter really, although this chapter is out later than i wanted

**Chapter 6**

*****Present time*****

Naruto arrived outside the gates of Konoha. Turning around, he found himself staring back at the twilight lit village that was his home.

He heard a man approach from outside the village. He was robed in black, and had no defining features other than the scroll slung across his back, "You ready to go kid? We've got a job to do."

Naruto turned and nodded, a downcast look on his face. "Yeah, just wish I'd said goodbye to a few friends."

"You'll only be gone six weeks, don't worry about it! Anyway, this is a top secret mission."

"I know, but the team really grew close during our last mission, then two days later I leave without a word, just a letter, it just doesn't seem right… That, and the fact that Haku's still upset about Zabuza's death. She acts happy, but I can tell it's just a front. I promised her I'd help her and I never break a promise, that the way I do things."

"Hey, sometimes our jobs as a ninja require us to do stuff like this, don't dwell on it. You can't change it; you just have to walk on." Seeing Naruto still didn't look convinced, he added "Come on, I want to be away by the morning." The man pulled a bottle from under his robe, adding "I hear you like sake."

'_**I like this guy'**_

*****The following morning*****

_Team 7 – meeting point­_

"Where is he!?" Roared a frustrated Sakura, a flinching Sasuke holding her hand. Haku stood a little way off looking down the river, thinking about how her life had changed in the past few days. She had changed her clothes since team 7 had returned; she now wore brown ninja pants with a kunai holster on her right leg. She wore a sky blue jacket with a light grey section across her middle, and brown fingerless gloves. She had also started to carry Zabuza's sword across her back.

_Hokage tower_

"Alright Kakashi, I'll tell you the full situation." The old Hokage said with a sigh. A very frustrated Kakashi can be very persuasive. "I sent Naruto on this mission because I think he is the only one who can do it."

"You… huh? Only Naruto? What kind of mission is this?"

"I'll explain. After you had delivered your reports from your last mission, Naruto came back to talk to me. He said that Kyuubi felt something wrong."

"What does that have to do with it?"

"Kyuubi felt that it was a possibility I could die in the near future."

"Alright, bu- Wait, What?"!

"I can trust the Kyuubi on this because Naruto would be affected through my death. Although Kyuubi is a demon, he had a need to keep his host alive and well, both physically and mentally."

"How's that work? I can understand why Kyuubi needs to preserve Naruto physically, but why mentally?"

"The Kyuubi's world is based on Naruto's state of mind. Originally, it was a dark cage, but now Kyuubi's free to roam within Naruto's Imagi-Nation." Kakashi groaned at the old mans pun. The Hokage continued "My death would affect that, since I'm one of the few who treat Naruto with any sort of respect, so I sent them on a mission to retrieve Tsunade of the Sannin. Jiraiya of the Sannin is with him,-"

"Jiraiya? Isn't he enough on his own?"

"Jiraiya isn't suited to the task. I need to name my successor, and I know Naruto's dream is to become Hokage but he is far from ready. They'll be back in six weeks in time for the Chunin exams, and I apologise for taking him away from his team during this critical period, but spending time with his godfather is a good thing as well."

"Wait, that means..." Kakashi had a look of shock in his eye.

"Naruto doesn't know, and I plan to tell him after the Chunin exams so don't tell him. Only four people, including us two, know. As for the other two, he's travelling with one and going to find the other. It was his father's wish that he only be told when he could take care of the responsibilities that come with his name; the others also know not to tell."

Kakashi frowned "Does the Kyuubi know? And what about the genealogy records in the archive? Naruto must have tried to learn about his parents…"

"I assure you, its fine. More importantly, I believe you need to meet with your team, tell them that he has been sent on a six week top secret mission."

"They won't like it."

"Oh? And why is that?"

"That's the interesting part. One, it seems the reason that Sasuke was so silent on the fan girl situation wasn't that he wasn't interested, but because he didn't know whether he liked Sakura or Ino."

"Hoho, really?"

"Naruto helped him decide, and above that, Sasuke opened up about his brother and has actually started being sociable with the team."

The Hokage really looked surprised this time, and Kakashi continued to voice his concerns; "Haku will take it worst of all. After the death of Zabuza; she didn't know what to do. Naruto began to help her through that, and although she isn't over it yet, I think that she's begun to replace Zabuza with Naruto. It could get complicated later on."

The Hokage leaned back in his chair with a satisfied smile on his face. "That just reaffirms my belief that Naruto is the one for the job. He has a special way with people, and once they get to know him, he becomes a friend that would die for them without a second thought. He shows a great understanding of the pain others feel, and how to help them round it. Friendliness and Empathy, both qualities are needed for this mission."

"Just like him, eh? Well, guess I've got to go tell my team the news."

Kakashi made a few Jutsu Seals and disappeared in a swirl of leaves. Minutes later, a loud yell from three voices was heard from across the village each exclaiming "What!?" followed by a single voice "not so loud…" The old Hokage just chuckled and pulled a little orange book from his drawer. He opened it up, thinking to himself _'this is going to be interesting.' _

_id like a couple of reviews to see where i could improve - curent pairings - Side pairing - SakuXSasu, not the main one and neither of them are as stuck up as in the manga, yay  
_


	7. Visit to suna

This is the where the story really begins, the pairing are all fully decided, for those who know the meaning CRA is in effect, that and i cant feel my hands, ive just been sanding down this metal with a sander and my hands hurt real bad, yay

Chapter 7

Visit to Suna

*****with Naruto*****

_Morning after, several miles away from Konoha._

Naruto lay on the ground, his one blue eye staring lazily at the canopy of the trees. It was midmorning, and they had travelled all night, only stopping once the sun had reached dawn's horizon. Naruto couldn't help but think as the black cloaked man, who had introduced himself as Jiraiya of the Sannin slept not too far off. He had said they would start their training that afternoon, and they would start off again tomorrow.

'_I wonder how Haku's doing... I told the old man she could stay at my place for a while, I hope she's alright. She never did fully recover from Zabuza's death...'_

'_**I hope she doesn't find the stash'**_

'_I doubt that she'll search the place in that much detail. It's well hidden so don't worry.'_

'_**I'm not so sure.'**_

Swiftly changing the subject, Naruto thought _'I wonder how Sasuke and Sakura are doing.'_

'_**I can guess' **_Kyuubi proceeded to show Naruto various imaginative detailed images of his guesses.

Naruto yelled. The black cloaked man just rolled over, and Naruto lay back down. "Stupid perverted fox." He mumbled

'_**I do love your reactions; they make me fell all warm and fuzzy.'**_

'_I hate you.'_

'_**Basking'**_

Naruto sat up, and put his arms around his knees. _'I hope everyone isn't too mad at me…'_

*****In Konoha*****

_In Naruto's apartment_

Kakashi led the way in, Haku following. Sasuke and Sakura stayed outside, catching up.

"Alright Haku, since you've been staying at Sakura's house for the past two days Naruto said you can stay here until you can get a place of your own, and had a spare key made for you."

Kakashi handed Haku the key "You can pick up your stuff from Sakura's later."

"Have a look around; you've got the day off today, so settle yourself in. Naruto won't mind, it's his responsibility seeing as it was his idea to bring you back with us. I suggest having Sasuke and Sakura taking you to meet team 8 and 10 at some point today, what else… what else… ah, Tomorrow is your first official mission as a Konoha ninja and a part of team 7, so enjoy today."

Haku nodded "Thank you Kakashi-sensei!" She seemed a bit awestruck at being in Naruto apartment and it showed on her face.

Kakashi's eyebrows rose at this, "Tell that to Naruto when he gets back, it was his idea after all." _'Looks like Naruto has picked up a fan'_

Sasuke and Sakura were still outside.

*****With Naruto*****

Naruto stood in the middle of the clearing, panting heavily. The Sannin had been true to his word, and they began training that afternoon, starting with Taijutsu.

The white haired Sannin stood across from him, doing a little dance. Whilst drinking more sake; he was also singing some sort of drinking song.

'_He can throw me around whilst drunk! I don't know whether to laugh or cry.'_

'_**Don't worry kit. I, have a cunning plan…'**_

Naruto had the mental image of a grinning Kyuubi, and then the Kyuubi told him his plan.

'_Not nice, I like it.'_

'_**I knew you would, you're rubbing off on me I think.'**_

Jiraiya suddenly stopped doing his little dance, the song he was singing died on his lips, as he saw that he was surrounded, by very naked females, at least forty, all of which were carrying some form of weapon, from daggers to greatswords.

A sudden explosion of blood and a girly scream later found Jiraiya lying on the floor, blood still coming from his nose, "What on earth was that?, a Genjutsu?" He asked whilst staring at the heavens.

"Yup, I made it a couple of days ago but I tweaked it just now, it casts a Genjutsu that makes the person think they are surrounded. You weren't ready for it so I could get you with it. I made… condition of your opponents just for you."

Jiraiya raised his head; he froze at the dull, crimson gleam coming from behind Naruto's eye patch.

"Ohh, you have something under that headband to hide, hmm? This I must see..."

It was Naruto's turn to freeze.

"I already know most of it Gaki. Don't worry, the third said you would probably tell me yourself eventually, although if I understand rightly he hasn't seen under that headband either. He said you had some strange abilities, though he has no idea about those either."

Naruto nodded at this. "Only three people have seen under it, one blanked out so she doesn't know, Kakashi-sensei's seen it and so has Iruka-sensei, and those two have promised not to tell anyone about it."

Jiraiya smiled to himself, "Alright, I'll keep my mouth shut too. Now, again, just Taijutsu this time" Jiraiya shouted as he resumed his song and dance. Sighing, Naruto charged again, and his face met Jiraiya's fist.

*****Four days later outside the gates of Suna*****

The sun was setting when the duo arrived at the great walls of Suna. They approached the gates, and a sentry halted them, droning "State your business." He looked bored out of his mind.

The Sage drew himself to full height and announced; "Jiraiya of the Sannin from Konoha and Naruto Uzimaki, Genin from Konoha, here on a mission from the Hokage."

The sentry's jaw dropped at the name of the legendary Sannin before whispering to his companion, who sped off.

"Please wait here sir; a guide to the Kazekage's tower will be here momentarily."

Jiraiya gave a sigh and started scribbling in his notepad. Naruto took this as a sign to get some practice done, and he drew a water balloon out of a small bag attached to despair's belt, which was now across his lower back, hilt at the left. He carried Kitsune across his back, the hilt above his right shoulder. He held the water balloon in his hand for a minute before the water balloon started going crazy, like something was trying to break out from it. Moments later, the water did, soaking Naruto's dry hand.

The remaining sentry's eyebrows rose at this. Jiraiya ignored him and looked up from his notebook at Naruto, "Nice work Gaki. After we visit the Kazekage we'll get you started on the next step."

Naruto nodded, as he took out another water balloon and repeated this, only slightly faster.

A short while later the sentry returned with a blond haired girl, she had a fan strapped to her back and a Suna forehead protector around her neck.

"Alright, my name is Temari, I'm the Kazekage's daughter, I'll take you to him" It was clear she thought she was above the task at hand.

'_**Ooh, my kind of woman!'**_

Naruto scowled at the demon's words _'Shut up Kyube.'_

'…_**Kyube?'**_

'_Yeah, you don't deserve a demonic title anymore.'_

At this point, Temari noticed Naruto's expression, and made one to match.

'_**Whatever, I am so going to like this place, oh so very much'**_

'_You really are perverted.' _

As Temari made eye contact, Naruto felt a sudden twinge in his right eye. His hand jumped to hold the right side of his head, and Temari turned away. "A-anyway, let's go."

"You okay Gaki?" Jiraiya asked, concern written on his face.

"It's nothing, just the heat… Come on let's go already." Naruto moved forward to follow their guide. _'What did you do Kyube?'_

'_**Nothing much, just made your life more awkward than it already was. And hopefully mine so much better.'**_

Jiraiya just shrugged at Naruto's response before following. _'What are you hiding; I would very much like to know.'_

Temari continued her cold Demeanour. Naruto looked at her back, trying to figure out just what the demon fox meant, when he sneezed.

Jiraiya grinned like a pervert finding another. "A pretty girl's saying bad things about you.

*****Moments Earlier, In Konoha*****

Haku pulled the package from underneath Naruto's bed with triumph. "I knew it! Naruto's a pervert!" She exclaimed, opening the package. "And… what a pervert…" She continued, seeing the literature inside.

*****Moments later, back In Suna*****

Naruto rubbed his nose and sniffed, when he stopped dead, smelling that familiar scent."

'_Oh, no…'_

It was very similar to the scent Sakura made when near Sasuke, or the girl in the ramen shop when she saw Kakashi.

'_**Oh, yes!'**_

Temari looked back at Naruto. Once she caught his eye, she blushed and turned back.

'_Oh no you didn't'_

'_**Oh yes I did.'**_

'_I am going to kill you.'_

'_**That is called suicide, the cowards' way out. You made you bed, now you have to lie in it'**_

'_You made it I never asked for this!_

'_**But, you didn't complain'**_

'_I'M COMPLAINING NOW!'_

'_**It was really more of moaning in disbelief.'**_

As this argument escalated within Naruto's mind, Jiraiya looked at the blond Konoha Nin, a puzzled expression on his face, _'He doesn't seen like his attention is always fully there, does this mean that he's already in contact with the Kyuubi at such a high level?'_

Jiraiya followed Temari through Suna; He looked at the Suna Nin with interest. She would occasionally look at Naruto before blushing slightly and looking away, only to look again a minute later. Meanwhile Naruto's attention shifted between her, his surroundings, and his inner world. _'Hold on… This could be one epic book! The cold, distant daughter of a kaze, rendered completely defenceless against the dark, mysterious ninja from another village, haunted by the demons within the depths of his mind… I am a genius!'_ The Sannin gave a small perverted laugh that went unnoticed by the two Genin; he began writing in his notepad.

However, the demons within Naruto's minds were not quite haunting the ninja, as much as merely tormenting his sanity.

'_Reverse it now Kyube. NOW!'_

'_**No, you do it.'**_

'_You know I can't, I haven't been able to fully master the techniques you taught me, let alone something I've never seen before! You fix it! Don't make me come in there.'_

'_**You can try, I'll win'**_

This psychological warfare between the two minds in one head continued until the party reached the door of the Kazekage's office. Temari knocked on the door, shortly afterwards a shout came from within, "Come in." Temari led the way in to the room, bowing to the man in the blue and white robes behind the desk, "Kazekage-sama I have brought the visitors as requested." She turned and was about to leave when the Kazekage responded, "Wait outside, you can escort them to their hotel once we have concluded business."

Temari just nodded and left, closing the door behind her.

'_Eh? Aren't they father and daughter?'_

'_**Can you feel the love?'**_

'_No, that's the problem…'_

'_**Kage families are like that. Just look at miniyou, he spends half his time trying to kill gramps'**_

Naruto didn't respond as he and Jiraiya entered the room. The Kazekage looked up from his work and said "Well then, to what do I owe this surprise Jiraiya?"

"Well, the Hokage asked us to track down and retrieve my old teammate, Tsunade, who just so happens to be here in your Suna." Replied Jiraiya.

The Kazekage seemed happy about this. "So will you be taking her back to Konoha? She really is quite a bother… Hmm… No one seems to be able to confirm her location, but we do know that she hasn't left the village."

"If we can convince her that is, we've been ordered to not use force. I'll also be training my apprentice here while attempting to bring my teammate back, since we have around five weeks. Actually, seeing as Suna has the most wind types, perhaps some training from Suna wouldn't go amiss as well, since he's also a windy... That would give me some more time for my research."

"If it gets her out of here and helps your research then I will naturally do everything I can to assist. Temari outside happens to be the strongest wind user we have at Genin level, one of the strongest in the entire village in fact. Her mission can be to teach your apprentice, leaving you to do the important work!"

'_Yep, sounds like Tsunade' _Jiraiya nodded "That will do very nicely."

"Temari!" yelled the Kazekage.

The door opened and the blond Suna Nin entered the room.

"I want you to escort these two to their hotel; you will also help Uzimaki Naruto, Jiraiya's apprentice in his wind element training. You will visit them tomorrow and work out a training timetable; you will treat this as a C-class solo mission so you will be detached from your team temporarily."

Temari stood there for a moment, until realisation hit her. "Y- Y- You want me to train him? Alone? For how long?"

Neither Jiraiya nor The Kazekage missed her stutter or her blush, neither reacted visibly. Jiraiya, however, was scribbling furiously into his notebook, hidden behind his back. _'This is gold'_

The Kazekage, however, seemed slightly sterner than usual. "For the duration of their stay, for more than that you'll have to ask them."

Temari turned to Jiraiya, since her blush deepened when she saw Naruto. She stuttered out another question. "H- How long will you be staying?"

'_This is too good!' _thought Jiraiya, scribbling notes furiously."At most? Just short of five weeks."

The Kazekage then noted "However, it could also be just a few days, so don't-" Jiraiya flashed him the notebook, at which point the Kazekage understood, "-Let a moment go to waste!"

And with that, Naruto started the most interesting five weeks he had ever had yet.

*****Two weeks later*****

Naruto was sprawled on the dusty ground. He stared at the bright sky, sweat shone on him, his swords and jacket long since discarded.

Temari stood nearby, panting heavily and blushing deeply; though not quite as bad as the day they first met, two weeks ago.

In that short time, however, Naruto's training had gone better than anyone had expected. With Jiraiya, Naruto had improved his Taijutsu, Kenjutsu and Ninjutsu. With Temari's elemental training, however, he had already managed to split the leaf perfectly and was starting to learn his first Kaze Jutsu, Cutting whirlwind technique.

After a short break Naruto stood up and unsheathed Kitsune. Standing in an attack stance, he brought the blade in a diagonal slash; making a small sandstorm.

Temari just watched Naruto dumbly, _'It took me years to master this move; he could do by next week easily, two more at most.'_

Naruto turned around, showing his trademark grin, which faded into a frown as he saw the person in the distance, "Hey, Temari? Who is that over there?"

Temari turned round and her face paled, "Oh, My brother, Gaara..."

'_**Shukaku'**_

'_Huh, who?'_

'_**That Gaara kid contains the one tailed beast, like you carry me, but his seal is substandard so he's no contender for the yearly not-a-psycho award.'**_

'_So? We just have to get Ero-sennin to fix it cool, right?'_

'_**Not that simple.'**_

'_Why?'_

'_**He's a contender for the yearly definitely-a-psycho award.'**_

With that there was a swirl of sand and Gaara was stood suddenly closer, about a foot away from Naruto. The remaining colour from Temari's face vanished as Gaara said "Your blood, it would be so sweet…"

"Ga- Gaara, wait-"

Naruto, however, stood his ground, looking Gaara in the eye. With a smile, Naruto lifted the headband covering his right eye, and sure enough, Gaara's eyes began to bleed.

He did not, however, fall.

"**Ah, Kyuubi... That must be you…"**

Gaara, looked up, his green eyes turning golden, what sanity he had leaving him. Naruto could see that the demon was taking over Gaara's unconscious body.

"_**And he's the winner."**_

"Gaara! STOP!!"

Temari rushed to what she believed to be her brother. Naruto, however, sped between them, stopping her. "That's not Gaara" he said, both eyes now red, his whiskers and fangs growing more prominent

Temari looked shocked, and a single thought went through her head. 'He's like Gaara…"

Naruto gripped Kitsune hard as it glowed a brilliant white. He raised the blade above his head as Shukaku turned to face them. Naruto brought the blade down, crying out; "Cutting Whirlwind!!"

Temari couldn't believe what she just saw; Naruto used her own technique to knock down Gaara in his frenzy, something she couldn't do, and something even the Kazekage had difficulty doing.

Gaara's head rose and Shukaku roared with rage; **"How dare you- !!"**

But Naruto had already dropped his blade, and was rushing towards Gaara, hands spinning around, forming a Rasengan.

'_**That won't be enough to knock him out kit...'**_

"I KNOW!" Naruto cried this, as red chakra started to spill into the orb. "ONI RASENGAN!"

"**AARRGGGHHH!!!" **Gaara and Shukaku both cried out is pain as the red sphere disintegrated Gaara's sand defences and into his chest. His screams ended and he passed out.

Naruto got up, checked Gaara's pulse, saw that he was alive and breathing, and stood to full height, wavering. He then saw Temari rushing towards them, when Jiraiya appeared between them in a puff of smoke.

"So you ready to go Gaki? I have a lead on whe-"

"Hey Ero-sennin," Naruto interrupted. "I need you to do something for me…" He said as he collapsed face down in the sand.

I would greatly appreciate some reviews to make this better, please


	8. Befriending the demon

I have to apolegize, this was ment to be up on monday, but i had problems, but here it is, Shadan, thanks for the comments, fight scene, or writing in general never was my specialty, the reson why Zabuza was decked easily comes into play soon, and for Sageofthe6paths as well, do not give up hope for the femhaku pairing.

Chapter 8

Befriending the Demon

Naruto woke up, face in the pillow. It was an unfamiliar pillow, so he didn't move. Instead he sniffed. _'That's_ _Temari's scent, she's either here or I'm in her room. She doesn't smell like she does when she's around me so I'm probably alone... What do you think Kyube?'_

Silence.

'_Kyube?'_

His head felt empty… lonelier than it had for a long time. He realised that the Kyuubi wasn't in his head. Naruto decided that this could be a perfect chance for some much needed 'Me' time. He was just about to start contemplating the mysteries of the universe when-

"So, you're up…"

Naruto froze. How had he not sensed Temari? The chill moved down to his bones when he realised: _'I've been out for days… so she hasn't been subject to Kyubes Genjutsu… Oh Crap she's realised she's not actually attracted to me and that something's up I'mgonnadieI'mgonnadieI'MGONNADIE!!!'_

"Um…Hi, Temari..?"

"Spill it."

This wasn't what Naruto was expecting "Huh?"

"You're a Jinchuriki, Like Gaara. Host of the Nine-Tailed Kyuubi if I'm right."

Naruto paled, a completely different type of fear. This was the first time anyone had him cornered like this.

"You already have a high level of contact with the Kyuubi, judging from the amount of times you zone out for a few seconds. You also know how to use its chakra, if that 'Oni Rasengan' is of any judge. More likely, it's been teaching you things, like that my brothers seal was defective."

Naruto suddenly found an escape rope from this dangerous topic "How is he? Did Jiraiya's-"

Temari spun Naruto round to face her. His right eye was closed: he was in his boxers and a T-shirt, no headband to cover his demonic eye. "He's fine, He should be himself when he wakes up, and I have you to thank for that, but first things first." She glared into his eyes, and Naruto had only one thought.

'_Oh Crap.'_

Before he could do anything, her hands were on his face, and pushed up his closed eyelid. She didn't even flinch at its demonic appearance.

"Thought so."

Naruto blinked _'Wait, what?'_

"You covered your eye, yet had perfect depth perception. Only logical explanation was you were hiding something, no way would anyone copy Hatake's lack of style without a good reason"

"Actually, Kakashi-sensei hides a sharingan under there"

She looked mildly surprised at this, but then nodded "Makes sense, He is called the copy ninja after all. So, how'd you get your eye? What's it do?"

Naruto gulped. He was seriously stuck with no choice, so he told her everything between the first time the Kyuubi spoke to him, through Mizuki's betrayal, and about the Chikara Kioku.

Temari listened through it patiently, and at the end of it, she asked "you mentioned it has other abilities; what like?"

Naruto almost began to sweat at this point. "There's one for making an opponent think they're surrounded called Shinkiro Kakomu, one for night vision that I like to call Yomi Me, and one for telling if a person is lying or concealing emotion called Hikari Hiko." _'And one that can apparently control emotion, but I can't actually use that one myself, nor do I really want to, but she doesn't need to know tha-'_

"Do you have one for controlling emotion?"

Naruto actually felt the sweat on the back of his neck at this point. "I take that as a yes then." Temari actually looked disgusted at this. "How could you…"

Naruto turned to face her and decided to come clean at this point, realising that grubby wasn't going to cut it here; "I can't use it, buy the Kyuubi can. I'm sorry, but I had no idea it could do that, and frankly, I'm disgusted with it myself."

'_**Some friend you are. I was even doing you a favour!"**_

Naruto sat bolt upright on the bed "WHEN THE HELL DID YOU GET UP!" He noticed the shock on Temari's face, and he realised he just said that out loud. He looked at Temari and said "Sorry…"

'_**Don't apologise to her! I'm the one who's hurt!'**_

'_It's your fault we're in this mess'_

'_**No, it's your fault! You should have slept with her when you had the chance!'**_

Naruto brain temporarily shut down at this lack of logic _'How… how would that have worked exactly? Surely I would be worse of for becoming a RAPIST!'_

'_**It's only rape if she says no.'**_

'_You were controlling her! She couldn't say no!'_

'_**Either way, you'd be feeling fairly awesome right now and could probably wing your way out of this mess. '**_

Naruto got out of the bed clutching his head. As he reached for his clothes he failed to notice Temari blush for a moment then look away. He walked out of the room, tugging on his trousers while muttering "I need a strong drink… Beer, Sake, Paralyzing venom, _anything_ to shut that nutjob up…" He appeared to have forgotten all about Temari at the moment, and she made no attempt to remind him.

It wasn't until a moment after he left that Temari regained her composure and wiped the blood from her nose.

The second thing Naruto didn't notice was that he forgot to shove his business back into his boxers.

Naruto found his way to the kitchen and was rummaging in the fridge when he realised that he wasn't alone. He looked up and saw Gaara. He was eating a bowl of Cereal in his pyjamas, despite the fact that it was at least midnight. Gaara offered Naruto the box, asking "Sugar Puffs?"

Naruto poured himself a bowl, and filled it with milk. Gaara passed him a spoon. "Thanks", Naruto mumbled.

Gaara looked down at his feet. "I ought to be saying that to you. I- I'm Sorry…"

Naruto looked at him, and swallowed his mouthful of sugary honey goodness. At first, Naruto was worried that Gaara would see his right eye, he's left the headband upstairs, but he appeared to have gotten away with it in the darkness. He decided to be of some comfort to him. "Don't be, you had no control over yourself, you can still make up for it."

'_**There you go again; helping everyone you meet just because they've suffered 'just like you have', Look where that's gotten you in the past! Then again, that's a weak argument, Haku's pretty hot and all over you.'**_

'_I have no idea what you are talking about, Haku's my friend.'_

'_**That's what you think…'**_

'_That's the Truth!'_

'_**Whatever…'**_

_*****Meanwhile, In Konoha*****_

"ACHOO!"

Haku was lying on Naruto's bed, reading his 'Literature'. She rubbed her nose and said to herself "A handsome boy must be talking about me… Hope its Naruto… Or maybe it's just a pretty girl…"

_*****And Back in Gaara's house*****_

Gaara smiled at Naruto as he continued his internal argument with Kyube. "At least you two have some sort of decent relationship. Shukaku just tells me to kill and kill and kill… I'm sick of it…"

Naruto broke out of his discussion to comfort the depressed Jinchuriki. "You just need to learn how to control it, put a leash on it, that kind of thing!"

'_**WHO'S GOT A LEASH ON WHO YOU WORTHLESS DOG!?!?'**_

Naruto rubbed his headache as he continued; "What I mean is to establish a link with your demon; communicate with it, let it help you, but don't let it control you." His headache worsened as his own monster went ballistic inside his own skull. "I'll even teach you how if you show me the booze"

Gaara was surprised by this offer; as he reached for the Sake "I thought you were training with Temari?"

Naruto shook his head, gratefully accepting "I've pretty much got wind Chakra down, I'm just using the training as an excuse to keep out of Jiraiya's research…" He downed the half-pint bottle with a shudder. "Ah, that's better… Shuts him up like you wouldn't believe…" Gaara was impressed at this.

Naruto looked at Gaara. "Well, I'm off to bed, Night!"

Gaara smiled at him. "Thanks. Goodnight."

Naruto put his empty cereal bowl into the sink and walked towards the stairs. He caught Gaara's eye in the mirror and his right eye suddenly killed. Naruto winced, then paled as he reached realisation.

'_K-Kyube? W-What did you just do..?'_

'_**Made your life a living hell…'**_

'_No, you, you didn't…'_

'_**I did…'**_

'_A- A homophobe like you-'_

'_**What do my double standards have to do with my revenge? …Oh, ew, no! NO! Gah! Do Not Want!'**_

Naruto relaxed, and began to climb back up the stairs to the room he woke up in. It didn't have many personal belongings inside so it was unlikely that it was Temari's. '_So, what did you do?'_

The Kyuubi glared_**'I used Yume Kunren on him, means that he'll be getting eight hours solid of Taijutsu training in his sleep.'**_

Naruto thought about this. _'You told me about that one; don't you need to know the skills you're teaching?'_

'_**I know Taijutsu.'**_

Naruto laughed with scorn, getting into bed. _'Yeah, whatever…'_, and he fell asleep.

The next morning, Naruto woke up with an uncomfortable yet pleasant feeling of warmth on his back. He rolled over and found an unconscious Temari in her pyjamas. _'Does everyone in the sand sleep in pyjamas, or just this family?'_

'_**More importantly, her bra's over there.'**_

'_What? Okay, what the hell happened?_

'_**Well Watson, it appears that she didn't realise that you were sleeping here, and went to bed. She's probably been watching you without sleeping as you healed.'**_

'_Holy crap, this is HER room? _

'_**More importantly, I appear to be able to control your right arm right now…'**_

Sure enough, Naruto's arm was sliding up Temari's waistline, and there was nothing he could do about it.

'_Dammit hands, listen to ME!'_

'_**But they like my idea So Much More**_

This was getting a bit much for Naruto, whose nose was starting to bleed. He managed to cross his fingers behind Temari's back and release the Kage Bunshin.

'_**Oh, come on! That's cheating!'**_

Naruto opened the door and walked into the room, quietly picking up his things _'So is body control.'_

'_**Oh, I was lying'**_

"WHAT!?"

'_**That was all you'**_

Naruto notices that Temari was starting to wake up, so he rushed out of there. However, in his haste, he forgot his Konoha Headband and Longsword.

He got downstairs and found Gaara asleep on the table. Naruto forced his trousers on and positioned his headband over his right eye. He rummaged through the fridge and, after liberating several items from the fridge, he wrote a note for Temari.

Temari, Gone Training, Back later, Naruto. P.S., I stole your brother.

After deciding this was enough, he slung the sleeping Gaara over his left shoulder a bag with several lunches and Despair over his right, he went through the door, and jumped towards the training ground, eating breakfast along the way.

"Alright Gaara, training begins! First things first, let's have a quick sparring match to see how well you fight with Shukaku!"

Naruto was about as energetic as Gaara wasn't. "I lost all my sand jutsu though… I can't fight…"

Naruto sighed "Alright then, strait out Taijutsu. From what I know, you've never needed it before, so now's the perfect chance to learn."

Gaara perked up at this. "Funny you said that. I had a weird dream last night…"

Naruto was surprised "Y-Yeah..?" The Kyuubi grinned.

Gaara began to shift into a stance "Almost a nightmare really. A guy who looked like you, only with red hair, demonic eyes and a psycho grin, put me through hell teaching me Taijutsu… it was insane…"

Naruto began to pale, as the Kyuubi's words last night rang through his head.

'_**I know Taijutsu.'**_

Naruto looked at Gaara's stance. His left foot was forward, his right at a ninety-degree angle a double shoulder width behind it. He was hunched over, his weight shifting continuously from his front and back legs. His left arm hung limp between them, while his right arm was in a fist by his waist, ready to strike. _'What is that stance?'_

'_**Not telling. This is my revenge…'**_

Naruto got into his own fighting stance _'His muscle strength isn't much at all, he's not going to hurt me much'._ Naruto's stance was closer to his walking stance, but with his forearms at head height, not unlike a boxer. However, unlike a boxer, Naruto was also shifting balance between his feet, occasionally lifting his front foot off the floor.

'_**I know, I just want to see you get owned by a total newbie.'**_

The penny dropped as Gaara charged forwards _'You planned this last night? You couldn't have predicted we'd have a Taijutsu match!'_

The Kyuubi grinned as Gaara kicked into Naruto's guard. _**'Temari isn't the only one I can give funny ideas to…'**_

Gaara then span round, sending his other foot towards Naruto's head. Naruto released his elbows grip on Gaara to block the side kick, earning him a swift kick in the chest.

Gaara seemed just as surprised at his skill as Naruto. "…I know Taijutsu…"

Naruto got up and lowered his centre of gravity, putting his left hand forwards, taunting Gaara. "Show me."

'_**That would have been much more badass if you hadn't stolen it from that movie once'**_

'_SHUT UP!'_

Kankuro entered the kitchen, and started to make an omelette. He reached into the fridge to grab a carrot, only to find them all gone. He sighed, and settled for pepper instead. He chopped it up and added it to the pan of eggs, and put it into the oven to cook. While he waited, he poured himself a glass of orange juice and walked over to the table, where he saw the note.

Temari, Gone Training, Back later, Naruto. P.S., i stole your brother.

Kankuro quickly put two and two together. "Idiot! Gaara's barely healed after what you did to him!" He finished his glass and ran out of the door.

The door burst open again as Kankuro rushed to turn off the oven. He was about to leave the omelette, when he saw that it was done. Wrapping it in a napkin, he ran out of the door again to the training grounds.

An hour after they began, the two ninja were still at it. Gaara was keeping up with Naruto, slowly getting more and more used to this new experience. _'Who knew that Taijutsu could be so… fulfilling?'_ He sent a roundhouse kick to Naruto, who blocked it with his knee, then stepped forward and sent t he same kick back at Gaara. He blocked, only to find out too late that it was a feint, and the real kick was homing in on his head fast. Too late to block, Gaara braced himself, but the kick never came.

"YES! Now that's what I'm talking about!"

Gaara turned to look, and saw that Naruto's shin had been blocked by a pillar of sand, which then fell apart. Naruto fell back onto his backside, panting. Gaara just stood in amazement, trying to catch his breath.

Naruto grinned, covered in sweat. "See? You can still use the beasts power! You just need to remember not to rely on it, or it'll consume you!"

'_**So that's why you never listen to me!'**_

'_I never listen to you because you're an idiot!'_

Gaara sat on the ground, reaching for the bag. He grabbed two bottles of water, just as Naruto got kicked in the head. "Ka-Kankuro!"

Naruto's attacker turned to Gaara; "Are you alright? I came as fast as I could!"

Gaara got up, "Yeah, I'm fine? Why wouldn't I be?"

Kankuro looked confused "Eh? Wasn't Naruto using you as a punchbag or something?"

"It was really a two way thing."

Kankuro looked apologetic "Oh, so it actually was training, sorry about that." He looked down at the person under his feet. "We cool Naruto?"

"…Get…Off…"

"Huh? What was that?"

Naruto disappeared in a puff of smoke, and Kankuro was stood in a shrinking shadow. "Huh?" He looked up to see a falling Naruto, just in time to get a face full of boot.

"HOW DO YOU LIKE IT!? HUH!?"

'_**You're getting good at that Surprise Kage Bunshin thing you do, I didn't even see you set it up!'**_

Naruto calmed himself down and stepped off Kankuro. "Well, since you're here, you can help."

Kankuro paled, and then grinned.

The three were sparring until nightfall

Temari woke up around noon. She hadn't slept in a few days, what with Naruto and Gaara recovering in his and her bedrooms. She didn't like the way Jiraiya grinned when she offered her bed for the unconscious Naruto, but she needed it to get the information she wanted. However, she didn't expect him to sleep for 36 strait hours. As she got up, she noticed that a few things were wrong. One of them was that Naruto left his sword, Kitsune. That was only to be expected, since he wouldn't really be facing any enemies while he was here. Another thing that was out of place was the fact that Naruto had left his Konoha headband on the bedside table. Again, that's where she put it when she put him to rest, but no self-respecting ninja would leave home without their headband. Then again, it must be fairly awkward to be the only Leaf in a city of Sand, so that was also reasonable.

However, the fact that there was a warm, Naruto shaped groove in her bed right next to where she was sleeping required a lot more explaining. She was just starting to get angry, whe she noticed the shape and position of the groove relative to her. _'Holy crap, I crawled into the bed HE was already in!'_ Temari tried to justify herself, saying she was tired, it was dark, she couldn't have known, and that it was her bed and Naruto had no business in it. But considering that she never actually told him that, and the fact that no ninja would actually get that tired, worried her more and more as her face got redder and redder.

She didn't get out of the bed for another few hours.

That night, the three hit the bar. Naruto noticed the glares Gaara was getting. "Heh, Reminds me of home."

Kankuro turned to the other two. "They like this with you back in your village?"

Naruto looked down again. "Sort of, only they don't fear me so much as pity me, but yeah, the hate is just the same."

Gaara sighed "They just can't seem to accept me as human…"

Naruto looked around the bar, then something caught his eye, and his grinned his special grin.

'_**Awwww Yeeaah…'**_

Naruto turned and grabbed Gaara by the wrist. "Come on!" he said, dragging the Sand's demon onto the stage. Picking up two microphones, he passed one to Gaara and selected a song on the karaoke machine. The soft music started to play, and Naruto sang a melodic note "Yea-eah…"

At this point the rest of the bar turned in horror, as Naruto continued to sing;

"You are… My Fii-re… The one… De-si-re!"

People were just about to flee when Gaara raised his mic to his lips and sang;

"Believe… when I say… I Want It Tha-at way!"

At this point the drums kicked in, as crowd horror turned into utter disbelief, as Naruto began to dance;

"But we… are two worlds… apart…"

Gaara joined in the rhythmic movements, singing;  
"Can't reach to yo-ou-ur heart!

When yooou say!"

Then Naruto stepped in front of his partner, crying out;  
"That I Want It That Way! TELL ME WHY?"  
"Ain't nothin' but a heartache…"

"Tell me why!?"

"Ain't nothin' but a mistake…"

"Tell me why…"

"I never wanna hear you say!"

And in unison, they both cried out- "I WANT IT THAT WAY!"

*****The Next Morning*****

Naruto and Gaara were up fairly early, and met each other in town. Temari got stuck looking after the hungover Kankuro, but Gaara suspected that she was just avoiding Naruto. As they walked down the street, they both noted the looks and whispering as Gaara passed Naruto his Headband and sword.

The news of the singing, drunken Gaara had spread fairly quickly, and it's somewhat difficult to fear someone singing requests while wearing a paper crown. After the first song, it was hard to get him _off_ the stage.

'_**I love a happy ending. Especially the ones with booze.'**_

I would apreciate good feedback, please, also the singing gaara was my idea, the song was my beta, kill him for it if you wish, actually i let my beta run away with chapter 7 to 10, i wrote the basic plot, he went nuts

A thanks to:-

akatsuki-tenshi-kitsune

JadeStoneTheYounger

nobother

SageOfThe6Paths

shadan

glad you like the story. also check out the stories by samjaz, hes pretty good at the writting thing.


	9. Tsunade

Sorry for how long this took, the internet was acting up and other stuff happened, so im adding two chapters, 9 and 10, for those looking forward to the Naruto x Fem haku pairing don't dispair just yet.

Chapter 9

Tsunade

*****Early the Next Morning*****

Temari, was sitting on a cliff face, thinking. She knew that Naruto, Or at least the Kyuubi inside of him, had used some kind of Genjutsu on her to make her think she had fallen in love with Naruto. She new this, and through not seeing him for over a week since their 'discussion', she knew that she was no longer affected by any Genjutsu he'd placed on her.

'_So why am I feeling like this?'_

Maybe it was what he had done for her brother, maybe it was that he mastered her technique in less than a fortnight, maybe her mind had just associated Naruto with the effects of that Genjutsu, or maybe it was him as a person.

Temari sighed. She decided to go see him tomorrow. After she got her head strait. If she got her head strait. Temari growled as she tugged at her hair. She had another week or so before he left, she'd definitely sort things out with him by then.

*****Meanwhile, in the streets of Suna*****

Naruto and Jiraiya were outside of a bar.

"Hey, Ero-Sennin, you sure she's here?" Even though it was still before noon, it seemed lively. Naruto caught a man as he flew out of the window.

'_**That was nice of you.'**_

"That was nice of you"

Naruto was startled by how similar the Sennin's and the Kyuubi's thought processes were. "Erm…Thanks… Anyway, it's early in the morning, who would be drinking at this hour?" Naruto got his answer just as Jiraiya stepped into the bar.

'_**Someone who still thought it was late.'**_

"Someone who still thought it was late."

Naruto watched as his Sensei entered the Bar. "Okay, stop doing that, it's really creepy.", and followed his teacher.

Naruto saw Jiraiya approach a large pair of breasts attached to a blonde woman who was having an argument with the barman. "WHAT DO YOU _MEAN_ I'VE HAD ENOUGH SAKE!?" Their friend, a smaller dark haired woman, was trying to calm her down.

'_**Ooh, I like her!'**_

Naruto sighed. _'The Blonde?'_

The Kyuubi was shocked at Naruto. _**'Dude, She's gotta be fifty at least! Are you blind?'**_

Naruto was confused _'Seems thirty to me.'_

The Kyuubi stared in disbelief, until realisation hit. _**'Ah, she's using a Genjutsu. A Tailed beasts and fully synched Jinchuriki are immune to them, but you're probably seeing someone in their prime of youth'**_

'_She's huge. In a good way'_

'_**Wait until you see her without makeup on. Now, as for her friend, she's top notch. A level headed, practical and, get this, rational woman!'**_

Naruto took a seat so he could finish this conversation before he got to the bar; it was rare for the Kyube to talk about himself like this, and worth the wait.

'_**While your average girl would deal with a stressful situation by either suppressing it or venting it, just look at this girl!' **_Naruto turned to look at the bar. Jiraiya was arguing with who Naruto assumed to be Tsunade, while the girl Kyube was interested in had moved over to the barman whose shift had just started and was ordering some sake. _**'Temari would think about a solution to a problem, stressing over it until it drives her mad, while Haku would just go with the first solution that comes to mind without really thinking. Sakura would suppress it until breaking point, then she'll kick your ass, and Hinata would just run away crying.'**_

'_Not exactly flattering language'_

'_**I'm talking about how great this girl is, who cares about those losers?'**_

'_You until two minutes ago.'_

'_**Whatever. But see what she's just done? The problem was that her friend wanted booze, but the barman wouldn't give her any. What did she do? She waited for the barman to become distracted by a convenient argument, and then ordered some Sake from another barman. Genius!'**_

Naruto was surprised _'Never thought you'd be one for smart girls.'_

'_**I'm not, I just admire things so epic, only other epic beings notice their epicness.'**_

Naruto was about to reply when he saw that Jiraiya was calling him over to a table with Tsunade and the girl, who was now holding a piglet.

'_**She even has a cute pet! She's almost too perfect!'**_

Naruto started moving towards the table _'Just don't use any mind control things to make her fall for me or anything.'_

Kyube looked shocked. _**'Why would I do that? I don't want you to have her!'**_

'_Good, because last time-'_

'_**She's mine.'**_

Naruto stopped, then smirked and sat down. _'Good luck with that, what with you being a demon fox AND trapped inside a twelve year old boy's head.'_

'_**We'll work something out'.'**_

Jiraiya turned to his apprentice and introduced him; "Gaki, this is Tsunade and Shizune, her assistant."

"Hey."

"Good to see you."

"Hmph…"

'_**Shizune… even her name…'**_

Naruto poured himself a saucer of sake and threw it down his neck. Already Kyube's voice was fainter. Naruto smiled.

Two hours, sixteen minutes, One hundred and thirty seven bottles of Sake and seventy six games of cards later, and Tsunade still hadn't won once. Even the pig, who Naruto learned was called Tonton, had won at least once. Naruto quickly learned that Tsunade loved gambling as much as she loved sake, except she was awful at it. Naruto seemed to be the most capable of holding their drinks amongst the bunch, While Shizune didn't appear to be drinking much, but Jiraiya and Tsunade were completely wasted.

"That, That kid, hic, can really… Really hold his drink…" Tsunade said to Jiraiya, while Shizune dealt out the cards for another game.

"You're telling me!" Jiraiya drew himself to a full wavering height. "This Gaki, Right, can drink me under the table, carry me to the hotel, and, get this; he wouldn't even have a hangover the next morning!"

"So, Shizune, what are you doing in Suna?" Naruto hastily tried to change the subject before it became dangerous.

"Oh, we just travel around, drinking, gambling, skipping town after they try to collect what Tsunade owes, what about you?"

"Oh, the Hokage sent us to find you tw-Three" Replied Naruto, almost forgetting Tonton.

Tsunade sat bolt upright, Naruto's words having a more sobering effect on her than an angry letter from the taxman. Then again, Tsunade had seen plenty of those, so perhaps the seeing a stranger get reduced to ashes by a dragon, mere feet from your face, would be more appropriate. "What for?"

Jiraiya forced himself up, not quite as sobered as Tsunade "Well, Third's thinking about retiring again, and he needs a replacement to become the fifth. I'd do it, but I'm completely up to my eyeballs with the spy network and my research-"

"Still writing those perverted novels are you?"

"I won several awards for Icha Icha Paradise you know."

"Your only rival wrote Yaoi, and the board of judges were mostly men, Of course you won."

"That doesn't change the fact that…"

They continued this discussion for a good ten minutes, then Shizune took control "Tsunade, about their request to become Hokage, what are you-"

"No."

Everyone at the table just stopped. Even the Tonton read the atmosphere. Naruto was the one who broke the silence "Why not?"

Jiraiya and Shizune turned to glare at Naruto, but Tsunade just looked down. "That title… Hokage… It took the lives of two people… Two people who meant the world to me!" She turned to look at Naruto. "Why would I take the job that killed two people I loved?"

Naruto considered this for a moment, then stood up. "You know, my mission was to try and convince you if Jiraiya failed, but I can see it's pointless. Someone who can't even care for her own problems isn't fit to care for a village's." He turned and left the Bar.

'_**That's a change from the usual you.'**_

'_You're back then. Well, I can't stand people who would rather wallow in self pity than make an effort.'_

'_**You helped Haku, Gaara, Konoha, Inari, Sasuke, Sakura, I could go on.'**_

'_They're different. They wanted to change. They just didn't know how.'_

*****Half an hour later*****

Naruto was walking back towards the hotel, albeit an unusual route.

'_**You are aware that you're being followed'**_

'_Tsunade, for about twenty-five minutes, I know.'_

'_**You just gonna ignore her?'**_

'_Nah, slip into her mind, find out who her worst opponent is.' _Naruto grinned _'I have a plan.'_

'_**Sounds cunning. I like cunning.'**_

Naruto felt the Kyuubi slip out of his mind as he stepped into an alley way.

"I'm surprised at you." Tsunade had approached Naruto. "You abandoned your mission that easily, you call yourself a Konoha Ninja?"

"I am," Naruto retorted "However, I also know the place has problems, and it needs a decent leader just to stop the place going to hell. It'd need someone fantastic to sort it out, but I just don't think you're even competent."

"What was that?" Tsunade's face and posture filled with rage "Just who the hell do you think you are?"

'_**Got it, threw in a painkiller jutsu. You've got maybe ten, fifteen minutes before you get the killer headache.'**_

'_Thanks, good call.' _Naruto faced Tsunade, and lifted the headband covering his right eye "Naruto Uzimaki."

Tsunade's rage swiftly turned into shock, as Naruto continued "Also, I'm sorry for this…" The shock turned into horror as Tsunade saw herself surrounded by the same two people, cloned dozens of times, before she collapsed.

Naruto made sure she would be seen by someone, and hopefully helped, then he ran at full pelt to the pharmacy.

Jiraiya saw the whole thing from the roof, but wasn't able to hear what was said, nor see what Tsunade saw. _'Either way, the Kyuubi was involved somehow. That was a huge chakra spike, all of it demonic. Just what are you hiding Gaki?'_ He jumped down to pick up Tsunade and took her to Shizune, then went back to the pharmacy.

*****Half an hour later*****

"AARRRGGHHH!!"

'_**Don't say I didn't warn you.'**_

"IT NEVER HURTS THIS MUCH NORMALLY!"

'_**That's because it builds up in pain, while you get used to it. Only difference is this time you joined the party at full swing'**_

"GUURRAGH!"

"Sounds painful"

Naruto turned around, holding an icepack on his head, headache pills in the other hand. Jiraiya had just entered the room.

"I'll talk to you about Tsunade latEERRGGHH! Headache noOOOWW!"

Jiraiya sighed and put his hand onto Naruto's head. Suddenly his headache was gone.

"Woah, how'd you do that?"

'**Never become a drinker without knowing some good hangover cures.'**

"Huh?" Naruto blinked as he left the hotel room, finding him in a sewer like room, ankle deep in water. "Where am I?"

"_What, you've forgotten already?"_

Naruto turned, finding a young man behind him. He had red hair, had a psychotic grin on his face, but otherwise looked… like… Naruto…

The penny dropped when Naruto saw that his eyes were demonic red. "Kyube?"

"_Who else?"_

"So I'm where you are… Why do you look like me?"

"_How do you know that you don't look like me kit?"_

"Because it's my body, yours looks like a fox."

"**You're right there Gaki"**

Naruto turned round and saw Jiraiya. **"Thought this would be a good opportunity to talk, especially since you can't get out of here until you answer my questions. First, why does the Kyuubi look like psycho Gaki?"**

Naruto turned to Kyube. _"I'm a quasi-dimensional chakra demon; I can look like whatever I want to look like."_

"**Fair enough. Second, what did you do to Tsunade, and how did you know I saw?"**

"I could smell you a mile off."

"**Ah, you can do that, now answer the main question."**

"What I did to you, but another variant of it."

"**And the chakra spike?"**

"_That was me looking through her head. Hence kit's headache."_

"**Hmm... What else did you teach him?"**

They decided to tell Jiraiya about the eye techniques and about Oni Jutsu in general.

Jiraiya considered all of this "**Kind of like my Senjutsu…"**

"Huh?"

"_Never heard of it."_

"**That's because hardly anyone masters it. Most who try die in the attempt."**

"_Ah."_

"My turn to ask, why do you sound so… echo?"

"**Not my head. If you were in my skull you'd sound like this too. **_**And the Kyuubi would sound like this."**_

Naruto turned to Kyube, who asked _"Do I sound like that in you head?"_ Seeing Naruto nod, he was surprised_ "Wow, that's weird."_

"**Alright next question. I'll probably regret asking, but what's under the headband?"**

Naruto just shrugged and lifted the cloth covering his right eye. Jiraiya saw it and fell backwards. Suddenly, Naruto found himself back in the hotel room, with the sage passed out on the floor.

"He fainted"

'_**That's a new response'**_

Naruto got up and put Jiraiya to bed. He then noticed that he stank of sweat and booze, so he decided to take a shower and wash his clothes.

'…_**Hey, Naruto.'**_

"What now?"

'…_**Do I really sound that freaky in your head?'**_

That night, Naruto found himself in the watery cavern again. "Kyube?"

"_Over Here."_

Naruto followed the voice, and found the Kyuubi, once again in his humanoid shape. "What's up with that body? You never got round to telling me?"

"_Dunno, probably residual self image from seeing your ugly mug in the mirror all the time kit. Anyway, not what I wanted to talk to you about."_

Naruto didn't understand a word the Kyuubi just said, but he accepted its explanation. "Alright, what did you want to talk to me about?"

"_I can talk to you in your dreams at will now."_

"… You don't say…"

"_That's my point! That shouldn't happen. I don't know much about this 'Senjutsu' or whatever, but the only kind of jutsu that would let this happen is Fuinjutsu."_

Naruto still wasn't following.

"_The kind that sealed me inside you kit."_

"…"

The Kyuubi punched Naruto in the face "THE KIND THAT PERVY SAGE USED TO CHANGE THAT SAND IDIOTS RETARTED SEAL WITH THAT DAMN SCROLL OF HIS YOU DUMBASS REJECT!!"

Naruto got back onto his feet, rubbing his face. "You didn't sound demonic there…"

"Eh? What're you- _Oh, right, that was weird… anyway, image what we could do if we got your hands on that scroll kit!"_

"…What Like?"

The Kyuubi actually slapped his own forehead at Naruto's stupidity. _"For one thing, you could release me."_

Naruto shook his head "I was actually expecting you to try a different approach, but thanks for being honest." He turned to walk away

"_Wait, you're not going for it kit?"_

Naruto turned back, smiling "What, and unleash a quasi-dimensional chakra demon back into the world? No thanks."

Naruto walked through the bars and through the door. Kyube followed him, but couldn't get through the barrier.

"_Heh, that kid's just as troublesome as his father…"_


	10. Leaving the Sand

Chapter 10

Leaving the Sand

*****The Next Morning, the Kazekage's office*****

"I take it that your mission was unsuccessful then…"

Jiraiya nodded. "Tsunade left the day we made contact, and we don't have time to pursue. Either way, she made her intentions quite clear."

The Kazekage nodded. "Well, I must thank you both for your gift," The Kazekage tapped the advance signed copy of Icha Icha Violence, due to hit the shelves in a few weeks, "And also for what you have done for my son"

Jiraiya put his hand behind his head "Oh, it was nothing really, I just-"

"Thank you, Naruto."

Jiraiya stopped dead. "Eh?"

"Thanks to you, my son is well on his way to becoming a fine ninja. Not only did you notice that the source of his madness was a defective seal, but you befriended him, brought him closer to his brother, and you made him strong in a whole new way he never knew, emotionally and physically. I thank you from the bottom of my heart. "

Jiraiya turned to face Naruto, slack jawed. Since his normal clothes were being washed, Naruto was temporarily wearing his old orange jumpsuit, with the jacket tied around his waist in the heat. Despair was in his bag, by the door, and he was carrying Kitsune in his hand. "Erm… Thanks?"

Jiraiya was clearly annoyed at this, "Well, we really need to report back to the Hokage, so, we should be on our way…"

Kazekage stood up "Please, at least join us for dinner tonight before you leave! It's the least I can offer you!"

"Well…"

Enticed by the offer of free food, Naruto eagerly announced that they'd love to.

As the two made their way back to the hotel, Jiraiya stopped Naruto, disappointment showing on his face.

"Something wrong?"

Jiraiya sighed. "Naruto, how long ago did we leave the village?"

"About four weeks ago, why?" _'He called me Naruto, not good.'_

"And how long have we been in the Suna?"

"Three, Why?"

Jiraiya sighed again. "So when were you planning on doing this Elemental Training THEN!?"

Naruto flinched at the sage's anger, while the Kyuubi laughed. _**'Busted!'**_

"I finished it!"

"AND WHEN DID YOU HAVE TIME TO TRAIN OTHERS!?"

"I finished it just before I met Gaara"

"Bull! No-one can do it that fast!"

Naruto sighed and drew Kitsune. Holding it in both hands, it began to glow white. He raised it above his head, and began to say the words "Cutting Whirlwind", when Jiraiya put his hand on the blade, neutralising the chakra.

"I'll take your word for it for now, you've clearly made progress. I won't even ask about the Rasengan, that Oni Rasengan was top notch."

Naruto smiled at this praise.

"Come on Gaki; let's get some training done before nightfall."

That night, Naruto, Jiraiya, Gaara, Kankuro, the Kazekage and Temari all had dinner together. Fairly soon the sake was flowing, and it wasn't long before Gaara was leading the others in a clumsy rendition of Bohemian Rhapsody. Temari wasn't quite drunk enough for Gaara Mercury, so she walked outside, to find Naruto was already outside.

"CAUGHT IN A LANDSLIDE!" Came Naruto's voice from inside.

"Noo escAPE FROM REALITY!" came the others.

"Hey." Temari said, sitting beside Naruto. "I haven't seen a clone that can eat before."

Naruto turned to her and smiled. "Shadow Clone, first technique I ever perfected."

Temari was surprised at this revelation, "But, doesn't that require a huge amount of skill and chakra? It should be impossible for a Chunin, let alone a cadet."

Naruto sighed. "I'm like Gaara, remember? Only my dad died, so no-one bothered to teach me anything but the bare minimum. I failed the Genin exam three times you know." Temari seemed really shocked at this. Naruto continued, "Second and third time was my worst technique, the clone." Naruto laughed "I could barely create a single clone that could stand, let alone two that could interact, like everyone else. Eventually, one of the examiners told me about the villages Kage scroll, and I stole it. I only got the first technique down before the same guy tried to kill me a couple of hours after I stole it, Guess what it was?"

Temari stared at Naruto. "Kage Bunshin, obviously."

Naruto shook his head. "Taji Kage Bunshin"

Temari's jaw dropped, "Tha-that's impossible! It'd take a Kage a month to master it to a level to create a hundred clones at once!"

Naruto smirked. "I can do a thousand. Thanks to the fox's chakra, I can keep it up for hours."

Temari couldn't believe it _'No wonder he got wind chakra down so fast- he was probably slowing himself'_ Temari wondered why she didn't just ask him? "Hey, Naruto? Were you deliberately holding yourself back? During our wind chakra training?"

Naruto shook his head "Actually, it was pretty hard, but for once it was something I was doing. Demon Fox has no wind chakra, so I was relying on myself," Naruto smiled as he looked down through his knees "It was a good feeling..."

It was then Temari saw Naruto for who he was: Not dark mysterious ninja, nor as a demon fox, or even as someone who grew up in the same hell as her brother but made something positive from it, but just as… Naruto. She slid her arm round his shoulders, moving closer to him.

"Huh?" Naruto turned to face her, and his blue eye widened in shock as she found pressure around his neck and pushed his back against the wall. Temari's face was close to his. Very close, so close he could smell her clearer then he could smell himself. He quite liked it, her blush was near crimson, her arms around his neck, and she was pressing him against the wall. Her whisper was so quiet he only just heard it, "I wanted to do this since I first met you." She closed the distance

Naruto didn't know how long they kissed for, but he did know it stopped when Kazekage bellowed "SO YOU THINK YOU CAN STONE ME AND SPIT IN MY EYE-YI!" The two broke off quickly, both equally surprised.

The mood was killed and buried when Jiraiya cried out "SO YOU THINK YOU CAN LOVE ME AND LEAVE ME TO DIE-YAAAIII!!!"

Temari and Naruto looked at each other, blushed, then laughed. The whole thing was just ridiculous. After the laughter stopped, Temari stood up, and Naruto grabbed her hand and stood up to kiss her. While Temari was surprised that he took such initiative, it was the pleasant kind. It was Temari who broke of this time, whispering "Fox is there isn't he?"

Naruto smiled, replying "Not when sake's involved…" as he moved in for Temari again "Take it you forgive me?" he said, kissing her.

Temari surfaced again, "You, but I'm gonna kick that fox's ass" she moved back into Naruto.

"An-ny way the wind, Bloows…" Sang Naruto's clone, completely oblivious to what was going on.

Naruto and Jiraiya both ended up staying the night. Jiraiya passed out drunk at the table with the others, while Temari fell asleep in Naruto's arms. Seeing that his clone was wasted out of his skull, he chose not to release the jutsu, summoning twelve more clones instead. They got to work rolling the drunken men onto their sides, to stop them from choking in the night, and got to work cleaning the mess.

'_**As figured, for every party, there's one loser stuck in the kitchen.'**_

Naruto started to dispel the sober shadow clones, and started putting blankets over everyone. _'You're back early.'_

Kyuubi smirked _**'You didn't drink enough kit. Not like you to leave the clone to do the partying while you clean up its mess.'**_

'_I was busy'_

'_**Really. What could be more important than alcohol?' **_Kyube noticed Naruto's expression as he draped a blanket over Temari's sleeping body. _**'Oh, no freakin' way!'**_

'_Yeah? So what?'_

Naruto felt an invisible hand -or paw- smack into his shoulder _**'Nicely done Kit! You actually got a girl drunk!'**_

'_She was sober.'_

'_**And I thought you didn't stand a chance since- wait, what?'**_

'_I kissed her because I wanted to; I know I wanted to do it because I only drank enough booze to shut you up!'_

Naruto then released the Kage Bunshin and felt the Kyuubi fade as the alcohol and memories from his clone rushed in. _'Yep… I had the better night…'_ and with those thoughts, he passed out on the ground. Twenty pints of sake would do that to a twelve year old boy, demonic host or not.

*****That Morning, the gates of Suna*****

"Thanks again Jiraiya."

"Oh, it's nothing, nobody likes a hangover!"

Naruto and Jiraiya were at the gates of the city with Temari and Gaara. Kankuro still had a bit of a hangover, even after Jiraiya's healing, and the Kazekage had to get back to work.

Gaara extended his hand for Naruto's. Naruto, who's wearing the dark trench coat once again, shook his hand. He was carrying a rucksack with his belongings and Despair inside, Kitsune hung low across his back. The handshake continued for a few moments, and then Gaara pulled at Naruto and clapped his back.

"See you in a couple of week's man…"

Naruto smiled "I'll kick your ass again at the exams."

The both laughed and pulled out of their hug. Naruto then turn to Temari, opening his arms for a hug, and was fairly surprised when she kissed him. Although not nearly as surprised as Jiraiya or Gaara.

"See you at the exams, right?" Naruto asked her.

Temari smiled. "Don't you dare take it easy until afterwards."

After Naruto and Jiraiya walked into the distance, Temari and Gaara turned back home. Gaara was the first to strike up a conversation

"So, you two going out now?"

Temari was surprised at Gaara's question, but then smiled. "No way, not yet. First we have the Chunin exams to deal with."

Gaara laughed "Come on, you really think that you and Kankuro are going to have it hard? I'm the one who needs to train, you two'll be fine!"

Temari looked serious. "I thought as much, except Naruto's grades were the lowest in the academy."

Gaara stopped dead in his tracks. "You're joking..."

Temari turned around and shook her head. "He even failed the Genin exam three times, and they only let him pass after he stole a kinjutsu scroll from the Hokage and learnt the Taji Kage Bunshin."

Gaara paled, then spoke. "We need to get Kankuro.

After a mile, Jiraiya stopped Naruto. "Naruto, IN between getting friends and girlfriends, did you actually manage to squeeze some actual training you're your schedule while we were here?"

Naruto sighed, "This again? I told you before, I got it down!"

Jiraiya didn't look happy. "Really? Then show me a Rasengan."

Naruto rolled his eyes and lifted his right palm upwards. As chakra began to collect, Jiraiya poked him in the stomach, and Naruto flinched as a shock went up his spine and into his skull. When he fell down to his knees, Jiraiya looked down at Naruto and said "Without the Fox."

Naruto got up, and tried collecting the chakra again. He then tried doing it two handed, like Jiraiya had taught him, but he couldn't get the right motion for it, and Jiraiya shook his head, disappointed. "I thought so… you've become too reliant on the fox. One day the fox will betray you, and then you'll-"

"KAGE BUNSHIN!"

Jiraiya looked back up as he saw Naruto holding his hand behind him, and a Shadow Clone was waving his hands over a perfectly formed Rasengan in the originals palm. Jiraiya was speechless.

The shadow clone disappeared, and Naruto brought the Rasengan in front of him, saying "I know I tend to use Kyube's chakra and abilities. I know I could do more by myself." Naruto looked up "But I've tried that, and it doesn't work. You can do things alone, but it works better if you do it together. Whether I use the damned Fox or a shadow clone to help me form a Rasengan, is there any difference? It gets formed quicker and stronger with the Kyuubi."

Jiraiya was surprised at Naruto's outburst as he continued; 'Kakashi-sensei has a Sharingan that was put into his body, but he can't control it, that's why he covers it up all the time. Because of that Sharingan, he's now the legendary copy ninja! If you have something, why shouldn't you use it? I have the Kyuubi sealed inside my body, so why shouldn't I use its power?" Naruto then rammed the Rasengan into a tree, obliterating the trunk with ease. "The Forth Hokage died sealing this monster inside of me, it would be an insult to not make the best use of his sacrifice. So what if everyone hates me because of Kyube? We're friends, and we rely on each other. That's why I don't want to fight alone, because it hurts, so please, undo what you just did Sensei."

Jiraiya was stunned at Naruto's words, then smiled, and placed his hand on Naruto's stomach again.

"Also, if you ever mention this again, I will kill you."

Jiraiya removed the seal he had just placed on Naruto with a smile, "Alright."

'_**Aww, Kit, I'm touched.'**_

Naruto's blood froze. "You heard that?"

'_**The whole thing, **_**Friend**_**.'**_ The Kyuubi began laughing his head off _**'Ah, that was hilarious Kit,'**_

Jiraiya stood up, "The Kyuubi's probably laughing at you right now, but here's something that ought to make up for it." He removed a scroll from his back and spread it out.

Suddenly, the Kyuubi was all business _**'That's not our scroll, it's a summoning seal'**_

Jiraiya explained "This summoning seal is a blood contract with the sage frogs. Trust me, they'll be of a great help in the-"

"Can you hear the Kyuubi?"

Jiraiya sighed. "No, but I can guess what it's saying from your face. As I was saying, this summoning contract-"

"Yeah, got that, where do I sign?"

Jiraiya groaned "You're really rushing into this you know-"

But Naruto had already bitten his thumb and stuck it to the correct point, letting the blood flow. "WOAH, Easy there Gaki!"

Naruto stood up. "That's it right?"

Jiraiya just clutched at his head as Naruto walked away. "Where you going?"

Naruto turned back at him, "Need a crap!"

Naruto checked that the Sage hadn't followed him, and he took his shirt off, and pulled his orange jacket out of his bag with a pen.

'_**What exactly are you planning on doing kit?'**_

'_Looking at that summoning seal gave me an idea'_ Naruto began copying the markings on his stomach inside the jacket.

'_**What is that exactly?'**_

'_You'll see.'_

Naruto then began to recreate the frog summoning seal around the copy of his own seal, but with a few changes. For one thing, wherever it should have said 'Sage Frog', Naruto instead wrote 'Nine-Tailed Demon'. Kyuubi figured out what Naruto was planning. _**'It's not going to work Kit.'**_

'_How do you know? You've never tried anything like this.'_

'_**But the fourth would have thought about this. If I could be summoned that easily, I would have made you do so ages ago.'**_

Naruto shook his head. _'Jiraiya has a scroll intended to edit our seal, so that must mean that our seal must have been built to be adapted.' _Naruto began to look over his handiwork, and burnt it into the lining of the spare jacket with chakra.

"HEY! GAKI!! You crapping your liver out or something?"

"Coming!" Naruto rolled up the jacket and shoved it into his bag. _'We'll finish this later.'_

That night, as Jiraiya slept, Naruto was sitting by the fire, scribbling into a notepad.

'_**Your obsessed with this idea Kit, you know that right?'**_

Naruto paused for a moment. "That's because if it works, we'll be unstoppable."

'_**But it won't. That's my point.'**_

'_I'll make it work'_

Kyube sighed at Naruto's thick-headedness. _**'It won't work kit, that's my point. It can't work because there is a seal, made by a ninja much stronger than you, used a much stronger jutsu than you, and offered a much higher price than you, to keep me IN!'**_

Naruto fixed his gaze. _'Then I'll get started on it now, so it'll work when I'm a Kage.'_

'_**It's not about power. It's the higher law.'**_

Naruto blinked. Was the Kyuubi actually about to reveal something?

'_**Mankind cannot gain anything without first offering something of similar value Kit. You cannot perform Ninjutsu without Chakra, you cannot run if you don't rest, you cannot move if you don't sleep, you cannot eat without paying for the food'**_

Naruto interrupted _'Actually, I've done that lots of times.'_

The Kyuubi shook his head _**'Another lesson Kit, Money is worthless. To eat, you pay with work to grow and prepare the food, but it goes deeper than that.'**_

Naruto was really interested now _'How deep?'_

'_**Very, but I'm not telling you. It's meaningless if you don't figure it out yourself Kit.' **_Naruto wasn't disappointed, in fact he was impressed that the Kyuubi was actually leaving him room do to things on his own. _**'The point you need to get now is that everything has a price. Everything. The more you pay, the more you get. However, you can't outbid **__**Yondaime, Kit. He paid the ultimate price.'**_

'_I know that he died sealing you into me.'_

'_**Death? Death is nothing! Even if there is no afterlife, merely Ending is nothing compared to what that idiot did to himself. You Cannot Undo What He Did Kit. The idiot deserves better than that.'**_

Naruto shrugged _'You almost sound serious'_

'_**I a m s e r i o u s'**_

Naruto stopped dead. For the first time since they met, The Nine Tailed Demon Fox actually was serious. This was a line in the sand, and the message was clear. Naruto understood his position. _'Alright then.'_

'_**Good.'**_

'_I'm still going to try and complete this summoning seal'_

Kyube froze._ 'Was this child really so idiotic?'_

'_Don't get me wrong, I know I was out of line taking the seal so lightly.' _Naruto breathed. _'However, I still think that the seal was meant to be used.'_

The Kyuubi was shocked at this, then smiled. _**'Heh, don't say I didn't warn you Kit.'**_

The next few days travelling had a new kind of training. Back in the Ninja academy, Iruka-sensei was the only one who had ever bothered trying to teach Naruto, and even that was rarely above the bare minimum. Before he met the Kyuubi, Naruto mostly copied the other students, tried to figure out what the teachers meant, did research in the archives before a librarian took the books from him, constantly telling him that those books were 'not for kids', even the academy books. Because of this, Naruto's actual knowledge of the ninja arts were limited, and even after the Kyuubi started teaching him, that was limited to what the Kyuubi knew, so Naruto knew nothing beyond Ninjutsu, Genjutsu, and Taijutsu.

Jiraiya was taking care of this problem though, and Naruto was learning all about herbs, which ones were medicines, which ones were poisons, and which made food taste good.

This was another skill Naruto had to learn. Jiraiya wanted to teach Naruto about using herbs in cooking, but was shocked to learn that Naruto couldn't cook. Naruto spent a whole day with his hands in bear meat, as Jiraiya taught him how to cook.

"Cooking is one of the greatest Ninja Arts Gaki. Right up there with Needlework, Bartering, Listening and Breathing!"

'_**He's talking crap, no self respecting ninja would do that Kit.'**_

But Naruto started to see what Jiraiya was trying to get at. As the head of the spy network, Jiraiya taught that ninjas should see and hear without being seen or heard. At first Naruto thought that all spies became invisible and hid behind walls, but Naruto understood that with these basic skills, not only can a ninja take care for themselves, but they could get a job almost anywhere, and gain information easily without having to use a single jutsu. Naruto asked about this, and if combat based ninjas used these.

"Are you kidding Gaki? One of the strongest sword ninjas of all time made a living from selling his paintings and carvings alone, let alone the money he gained from missions, duels, and his books!"

Naruto was very surprised at this: He always thought that if you were strong enough to beat your enemy, then that would be enough. Naruto pulled out his notepad and started to jot down what he had learned that day while they ate supper.

'_**Writing a textbook Kit?'**_

"Starting a notebook Gaki?"

The synchronism of the two teachers still scared Naruto slightly. "Kind of, it's just that this stuff is good, I don't want to forget it."

Jiraiya smiled. "In that case, don't forget to write down what the Kyuubi teaches you."

'_**Huh?'**_

Seeing Naruto's puzzlement, Jiraiya smiled again. "In fact, why not write down everything you learn? You can be just like Gai's pupil!"

Naruto thought for a moment, "You mean that bushy eye-brows kid? What's-is-name, err…."

Jiraiya laughed. "Rock Lee, and he does have bushy eyebrows, doesn't he?"

'_**Fairly accurate description if you ask me.'**_

"That guy's crazy! I'm not pulling out a notebook every time someone says something!"

*****Meanwhile, Back in Konaha*****

"ACHOO!!"

Rock Lee sniffed and rubbed his nose. "Must be someone talking about me… hope it's Sakura!"

Neji scoffed at his teammate "Why would a girl be talking about you?"

Ignoring him, Rock Lee jumped to his hands and toes. "YOSH! If I can do 1,000 press ups in the next ten minutes, then Sakura is talking about me!"

Tenten looked confused "That makes no sense…"

Rock Lee, however, was in his own world "Ten! Eleven! Twelve! Thirteen!"

Neji turned to leave. "Leave him alone Tenten, you know there's no getting to him when he's like this."

"Hold On" Tenten ran over to Rock Lee and placed a rock on his back, "Just to make sure she's talking about you!"

"Thirty Four! Thanks Tenten! Thirty Five! Thirty Six!"

*****Several miles from Konoha*****

"What I meant was that you keep track what you learn, it's to help future generations really."

"eh?"

"One day, Gaki, You'll be training ninja, and they could benefit from knowledge that you've acquired, but it's so far in the back of your mind that you forget about it until you need it, or after one of your students could have used it, and they suffered because of something you didn't teach. Battle strategies, even random thoughts are good to log down. Ask Kakashi tomorrow, I reckon he does it."

Naruto was surprised "Really? We'll be back home that soon?"

Jiraiya smiled and shook his head. "Sand to Leaf only takes a couple of days walking, a few hours if you're in a rush. You however, limped there."

"And Who's fault is that?"

'_**Yours. I told you to dodge.'**_

"Yours, I to-"

"Don't say it." Naruto climbed into his sleeping bag. "Night."

And The tsunade/suna segement finishes, and to avoind questions, no tsunade doesnt return to Konoha, review please, i want to know if people think this story is good.


	11. The return home

Chapter 11, yay, never though id get this far, bit dissapointed in the lack of reviews, hopeing it picks up, reveiw please, if only to tell me i suck, it will make me feel better.

Chapter 11

The return home

*****Three days before Naruto's return*****

Hokage tower

Kakashi stood in front of the old man's desk. The Hokage sat behind the old man's desk.

"I have something interesting to report," Kakashi started

The Hokage sighed "Oh, good, I could do with something interesting…"

"When talking to Haku, I noticed she's started referring to Naruto as Naruto-Sama."

The old man's eyes widened, "Seriously?"

Kakashi shrugged "Well, not all the time, but it's worth noting"

The Hokage leaned back in his seat, a smile returning to his face. "Very interesting, keep me updated." Both men let out a perverted giggle.

The old man suddenly became serious. "The reason I summoned you here Kakashi, is because I just got a message from your student."

Kakashi shrugged. "So how is he?"

The Hokage looked down. "Naruto and Jiraiya failed in their mission."

Kakashi's eye widened "So Tsunade isn't coming back."

The old man sighed. "Unfortunately, she isn't. Jiraiya is going to be back in about four days, apparently he is teaching Naruto something as they travel." The Hokage now looked grim. "It involves the Kyuubi, and Jiraiya said that it is imperative he learns this lesson." Kakashi nodded at this, as the Hokage continued; "that is only the start of the bad news."

Kakashi remained surprised. "What else could have happened?"

"Naruto met Gaara, The host of Shukaku."

Kakashi's jaw would have dropped had it not been for his mask. "What? Is he alright?"

The third smiled, "More than alright, he knocked Gaara out and had Jiraiya fix the seal. Apparently his was substandard, which allows the demon to drive the poor boy insane and to murder..."

Kakashi had a look of confusion. "But what would-" Then it dawned on him. "Gaara isn't so insane anymore is he?"

The old man's smile widened. "Far from it, the boy's completely stable, and in gratitude the Kazekage gave us some important information, Jiraiya sent it ahead..."

*****four days later*****

Naruto's apartment

Naruto put his key into the lock of his door, only to find that it was already unlocked. _'Haku must still be here then.'_

'_**Ohh, I like the sound of that.'**_

Naruto took a deep breath and cleared his mind, mentally blocking the Kyuubi. "I'll have to thank Ero-sennin for that."

Naruto stepped through the door. Ramen was being boiled. It was good to be home. He inhaled the welcome scent, and paled. _'Oh no…'_

His nose picked up another smell, one he recognized well, '_No no hell no…"_

Thoughts of Temari came to his mind and he blushed,_ 'Please let me be wrong, Pease please PLEASE LET ME BE WRONG.'_

He rushed into the living room of his modest apartment sweating in panic. When he got there, the image was burned into his eyes, his brain process stopping entirely.

Haku was sat on his couch wearing a pair of his boxers. Her long hair was wet down her back, beneath the towel she had across her shoulders, and Haku, unconcerned with her half nakedness, was reading a book, with more books piled on the table.

Naruto quickly averted his eyes and took in the state of the room. Clothes were scattered around the room, and he took in the fact that while a lot of Haku's underwear was on the floor, the majority were his. Since he was careful to tidy the apartment before leaving for the Sand, Haku had evidently taken to wearing his boxers. Blood began to trickle from a second nostril at the sight, and his brain functions began to return. Then he saw what the books on the table were and his eyes widened, _'Crap! She found them!'_

His panic turned to confusion when he then saw the particular title she was reading,

'_But, that's, a, Yuri, one'_

It was at this point that Haku looked up, and smiled. There was a slight blush as she said the strangest sentence Naruto had ever heard while sober, aside from perhaps something Temari said.

"How was your mission, Naruto-Sama?"

"It- It was a... Wait, what? Sama? Since when did you call me that?" By this time Naruto's entire face was red.

"You're looking after me. Or at least you would have been, if you weren't on that mission."

"Ah" blood was streaming from his nose, he then felt something impact him as something wrapped around his middle, and something soft and wet caught him in the face for a brief moment.

Haku was suddenly wrapped around his middle, her face against the side of the neck, Naruto became very conscious of what Haku was not wearing, and it was actually easier to list what she actually was wearing._ 'A pair of my boxers, that's it'_. The towel had been lost halfway across the room, and she was still his nose stopped bleeding, apparently crossing the point of no return.

Haku pulled her head up from his neck and Naruto caught quite a good view. Haku saw where his eyes were and grinned, a grin Naruto would know all too well if he wasn't out of town for the past six weeks _'Sometimes, things just work out too well.'_ She thought.

Her face moved very close to his, as she spoke with a slight waver in her voice, "You know, I think I love you"

Her lips pressed against his. Naruto's brain stopped here, so another part of his body took control, and wrapped his arms around her; the kiss went on for several minutes, until Haku eventually pulled away.

Both were quite breathless. Naruto, starting to get his brain back together, spoke first, "Yuri?"

Haku blushed here, "Actually… A-Apart from you…"

Naruto's head tilted to the side, puzzled,

Haku looked back at Naruto "I like girls…"

"Oh." Naruto's nose started to bleed again. Haku giggled, and kissed him again.

'_**That makes you a woman with a penis. That's the worst kind.'**_

Naruto tried to clear his mind to shut the Kyuubi, something that was understandably difficult in the current situation. _**'Even worse than the angry blonde ones from the Sand village that are gonna kick your ass for making out with a half-naked roommate.'**_

Thankfully Haku had her eyes closed and didn't notice as Naruto paled.

'_**Try not to die, you're breathing for two.'**_

*****Several hours later*****

Sakura and Sasuke were at team 7's meeting point. Once again, Sakura was yelling, "Where are Haku and Kakashi-sensei!?"

Sasuke flinched from the sound, and then twitched as he felt a familiar presence approaching fast from behind. _'Not again.' _He sidestepped, but the figure rushed strait past him.

Sakura felt someone give her a hug from behind, she sighed, "Hello Haku."

"She always does that then?"

Sasuke turned around at the familiar voice. Sakura did the same once she had extracted herself from Haku.

"You back then?" stated Sasuke, sarcasm in his voice.

"What gives you that idea?" Naruto replied with equal sarcasm.

Naruto sidestepped to the left as he the killing intent behind him, which went flying past in a streak of pink, "Sakura's still mad?" His voice held a slightly bored, yet questioning tone.

Sasuke just nodded, as Sakura turned, "What do you think!? You left without a word and left Kakashi-sensei to tell us!"

Naruto raised his visible eyebrow, "So the old man sent Kakashi-sensei to do it..."

Sasuke put his hand on Sakura's shoulder, the effect was almost immediate, and she calmed down.

Naruto let out a mental sigh. "So, does Haku hug everyone?"

"Just about every person she comes into contact with." Replied Sasuke with a smirk.

"Hey, not everyone!" Yelled Haku, as she jumped onto Sasuke's back.

Sakura and Sasuke laughed. Naruto joined in on the laughter _'That explains my welcome then.__'_, he thought to himself once he recovered

A swirl of leaves later and Kakashi appeared behind Naruto, getting him in a headlock, which failed as Naruto disappeared in a puff of smoke.

Kakashi stumbled as his captive disappeared. "How the hell does he do that?" Wondered Kakashi, as Naruto came flying down from the rooftops, fist headed for his teachers head. Kakashi threw a kunai into his students face, and kicked another Naruto in the stomach, exposing both of his new attackers as shadow clones. Kakashi span around and grabbed another clone by the face, single handed, throwing him into the wall. Instead of disappearing, however, it went strait through, and Kakashi realised that he had just thrown his twelve year old student, full force, strait through a foot of concrete. "Uh oh…"

"NARUTO!!" Sakura and Haku cried out in unison, Sasuke rushing to dig his teammate out of the rubble. Haku turned to her stunned sensei, distraught.

"How could you do that? You could have killed him!!"

"I-I was sure it was a clone…" Kakashi was clearly in shock for what he'd just done.

Sasuke stood up, grinning. "He's not there."

"Huh?" Kakashi twisted round to find an uninjured blonde Genin, holding a Kunai against his teachers back.

"Gotcha Sensei!"

In the Hokage tower, the third Hokage laughed as he heard Kakashi's yell, one of both relief and defeat.

*****After the mornings boring generic D-rank mission*****

"Alright, listen up;" Kakashi gave the team his eye smile "Next week is the Chunin exams."

"Awww yeah!" The four voices could be heard from quite a distance away.

Kakashi turned to Naruto and gave him a sadistic grin, maybe. Naruto stopped cheering and gulped. _'This about this morning?'_

Kakashi gave an evil giggle. "Luckily for you Naruto, you have to do the thing by yourself, at the request of Jiraiya."

Naruto began sweating like a pedo in a nursery.

"WHAT?" Yelled Haku, "Why!?" Sasuke and Sakura looked confused.

Kakashi gave his students a mysterious smile, probably, "Don't worry, all you need to know it that we are going to be training a lot in the next week." His sadistic smile grew, possibly. The four gulped.

It was going to be one interesting week.

On the way home, Sasuke turned to Naruto "Hey, want to get some ramen? My treat."

Naruto turned to his teammate in disbelief. The high and mighty Uchiha was inviting him to lunch?

Sakura nodded, grabbing Haku by the arm, "We'll see you guys later. Come on Haku!" She hand Haku walked off in the opposite direction.

'_Ah, he wants something. Sakura's in on it too.'_

'_**You catch on fast Kit.'**_

Sasuke and Naruto started walking to the Ichiraku Ramen bar. Ayame saw the two and smiled. "Hey! The prodigal son has returned!"

Teuchi turned round and saw his favourite customer, and positively beamed. "Naruto! Good to have you back! How was the mission?"

Naruto smiled as he took his seat next to Sasuke. These were two of the first people to actually care about him "Alright. Sand didn't have your ramen though!"

Teuchi chuckled. "Coming right up lad."

Sasuke raised his hand. "I'll have the same, thanks."

Naruto looked at his teammate, and noticed that he'd changed in the past six weeks. His thin body had started to bulk out, and his normally dark, distant eyes were warmer now, but just as alert. He also had a small scar to he left of his chin; If Sasuke had started shaving yet, you wouldn't notice it. Sasuke turned to him, seemingly also weighing him up. "You've changed since you left for the sand, dunce." Sasuke noted.

"So've you, emo."

The two laughed at the nicknames they had for each other back at the academy, both seeming incredibly useless now.

"Here you go! Enjoy!"

Naruto and Sasuke thanked Ayame and paid for their meal. As Sasuke began to eat, Naruto decided to ask the question; "So, why'd you bring me here?"

Sasuke paused, as Naruto started his meal. "Basically, I wanted to fill you in, and for you to do the same."

Naruto looked up from his meal "Rhen rye-?" Naruto began to ask, with a mouthful of food.

"Without the girls."

'_**Ah, it's about me then.'**_

Sasuke down another mouthful of noodles, then asked Naruto what happened on his mission, Naruto told him, omitting some of the details.

By this point, they'd finished their meals, but remained sitting. Sasuke got up, thanked Ayame and Teuchi for the meal, and walked away. Naruto quickly thanked them as well, and rushed off after Sasuke, Teuchi and Ayame chuckling behind him.

"Sasuke, what's up? Why'd you leave like that?"

"Why'd you lie?"

Naruto stopped dead. _'What's he know? He figured out about the eye?'_

Sasuke turned back to Naruto, sitting on a fence in the moonlight. "Girl who taught you, Temari?"

Naruto was puzzled. "Yeah?"

"She hot?"

Naruto did a double take. "Wait, what about Sakura?"

Sasuke glared at Naruto. "What about Haku?"

Naruto froze, staring at his teammate. _**'Oh he's good. That, kit, is how a shinobi uses an eye technique'**_

Naruto silenced the Kyuubi, getting his thoughts together. "Thing is, at the time, I didn't even think she cared for me more than a friend, so-"

"She kept asking about you." Sasuke looked down. "She really wanted to know more about you, and in the time you've been gone, she's probably built you up to be the best guy in the world in her head. You know she's gay otherwise, right?"

Naruto nodded, barely believing what this guy, who before couldn't give a monkey's about him, was actually looking out for him. "I-I know, but-"

"Do you like her?"

"Haku? Yes…"

"And Temari?"

"Yeah…"

"So what're you going to do? Break up with one of them?"

"I…" Naruto seriously thought about what it would be like to lose either of them. Haku had already been abandoned, and he really didn't want to hurt her, but he really cared for Temari, and really liked her too, so he decided to stop running away and face the problem head on, his own ninja way, and do what he felt was right.

"I'm gonna keep both of them."

Sasuke looked shocked. "…And if they find out?"

Naruto looked strait into his teammate's eyes, "I'll burn that bridge when I come to it."

Sasuke sighed and, to Naruto's surprise, slapped Naruto's hand. "Niice…"

Naruto blanked, something he'd been doing a lot lately. "Eh?"

Sasuke seemed genuinely impressed. "Guess you did have the right to say I had no balls back in the wave." Naruto shook his head. "A Demi-Tsundere and a Demi-Yandere at the same time… Yours must be cast iron and on fire!"

Naruto regained the power of speech. "Wait, You're gonna be helping me on this?"

Sasuke laughed "Suppose I've no choice. Go on then. Anything else I should know if I need to end up disguising myself or coming up with excuses?"

Naruto shook his head. "No, not really-"

"You're lying."

Naruto stopped, keeping a poker face.

"When you were gone, I developed a full two-tomoe sharingan, and I noticed that when I was concentrating on someone's face, I can see more expressions." Naruto was puzzled, as the Uchiha continued "Tiny, only there for less than a second, but they didn't match up with what people were saying, so I asked Kakashi sensei about it." Sasuke scowled at the floor. "He showed a flashed surprise, then sadness, and told me it was nothing. So I looked it up. "

'_**Oh ho, I see where this is going.'**_

"Micro expressions occur when people are hiding something. Disgust. Sadness. Fear. Contempt. Happiness. Anger. Surprise. They're the seven emotions my Sharingan picks up, but I can manage it without if I concentrate." Sasuke looked at Naruto, concentrating on his face. "If the emotion doesn't match the words, they're lying."

'_**Just like our Hikari Hiko, only automatic… Yep, you're screwed.'**_

Naruto suppressed the Kyuubi's influence again. This, however, seemed to make things worse, as Sasuke said "Disgust, then blankness, you're hiding something you're not happy about."

"Sasuke, you're going all Neji on me."

Sasuke glared at Naruto, and thought _'Bet he's __suppressing__ the Kyuubi... Heh, I know better than to confront him about that. If he isn't, he'll never trust me again, if he is...__'_  
Sasuke gulped. Naruto smiled with glee "There, Flash of Fear and you gulped, I'm not the only liar around here!"  
Sasuke stared at Naruto_**'Don't think it was worth it **__**K**__**it. Not for you anyway.'  
**_Naruto thought fast "Erm... I got beat up a lot when I was a kid, I had to learn to read emotions pretty well so I could get away in time."  
Sasuke nodded, it made sense. "You're lucky you're as sane as you are psycho."

Naruto sighed. "Alright, fine. I de-psychoed Temari's brother out. I thought it was something I should keep quiet about, okay?"

Sasuke nodded. "Okay, I'm sorry, cool?"

Naruto smiled. "Yeah, cool"

'_**Only because you can lie so well.'**_

Sasuke turned to leave, put one hand into his pocket and the other into the air, a cool dude leaving salute, "See ya tomorrow! Get a decent breakfast this time!"

Naruto laughed, "Yeah, sure. Later!"

'_**He knows something.'**_ Kyube was clearly happy about it. _**'He's not telling though, so he probably wants you to tell him off your own back,'**_

'_Suggesting that what he wants me to tell him about is you…'_ Naruto sighed. 'I'll tell him later, when I need to.'

'_**That's not the same as telling someone off your own back Kit. You still haven't matured in that respect since we first met.'**_

Naruto considered silencing the Kyuubi, but realised he'd been doing that far too often lately, and was playing right into Jiraiya's hand. He then had another idea.

'_Hey, Kube, what am I thinking?'_

'_**Right now? … Erm… I have no idea… Holy Crap I Have No Idea.'**_

Naruto grinned. His thoughts were his again, so long as he didn't put actual words to them.

'_**You're happy about this, so you've probably just figured out a way from stopping me from reading your thoughts.'**_

'_Fairs fair, I can't read yours.'_

'_**Fair point.'**_

The two bickered like this all the way home. Haku was already asleep, passed out on the couch. She'd obviously been waiting for him. With a smile, Naruto picked her up and put her to bed. He then cleaned the mess that had been accumulated, cleared out the rotten food from the fridge, made lunches for tomorrow with what was left, got a shower, then went to bed.

"Thanks."

'_**Hm?'**_

'_If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't be able to take care of myself properly. I just wouldn't have… the… time…' _ Naruto thought this as he fell asleep.

The Kyuubi looked over his sleeping host, and smiled.

'_**Heh, I never gave you that Kit. You can thank pops for that.'**_

*****Three days later*****

Naruto, Sakura, Sasuke and Haku were walking through Konoha. They were on their way to get some much needed tea after a hard days training, when a yell drew their attention.

Team 7 turned, and were met by a red haired Suna Genin,

Naruto smiled. "Hey, Gaara! How you been?" Naruto asked.

Sakura and Haku looked at Naruto quizzically, while Sasuke just nodded.

Naruto turned to his teammates and shrugged, "I met Gaara in Suna, helped him with a problem and we became friends."

Gaara just nodded his greeting; a smile was across his face. His clothes looked similar to the black business suit's Gato's better henchmen wore, but Naruto could tell it was different somehow. He noticed that Gaara wasn't wearing his Gourd anymore, noticed the thickness of his jacket and pants, and put two and two together. Gaara also wore a dark red shirt, and had leather fingerless gloves on his hands. The lighter shirt, combined with the heavier suit, showed the growth of Gaara's muscles. Naruto thought about the reasons for this change in Gaara. "How's your Taijutsu coming along? You seem more suited for that now."

"Not bad, though I believe Temari wanted to see how your wind manipulation's coming along."

Naruto and Sasuke paled, _'Not good!'_

'_**I agree Kit, it is not time yet.'**_

'_Not Time? TIME FOR WHAT!?'_

An evil laugh greeted him; Naruto was suddenly halfway down the street.

Haku asked the inevitable question, "Who is Temari?"

"My sister, she helped Naruto with his wind training, why?"

Before things could get any worse, Sasuke tried to defuse the ticking timebomb that was what Haku would learn from Gaara. "So, how's the Sand Village?"

Gaara paused at this sudden change in topic "Not bad, why?" but it was too late; Haku had a grin on her face and she gave chase.

Gaara looked thoughtful, _'Is it possible?'_

'_**Very much so, wait until that girl meets Temari, then the fun starts.'**_

Gaara shook his head. _'Shut up Shukaku, Naruto's not like that.'_

His demon laughed _**'He's hosting the fox, and HE's like that. You should kill him for what he's doing to your-'**_

Gaara Shook his head and turned to Sasuke and Sakura, "So, fancy a drink?"

*****That evening*****

Naruto found himself against the wall in his apartment; Haku was against him, her arms around his waist. "So, who exactly is Temari then?" Naruto gulped at the tone in her voice.

"Uh... I met her in Suna and she... helped with my wind chakra training."

Haku looked strait into his face. "That it?"

Naruto nodded, once again displaying his skills as not a good liar, but an amazing one. "Yeah, we're friends."

Haku sighed and stepped away from Naruto. "Shame… She sound's interesting…"

'_**BadabadabadabuWOING!'**_

Naruto's mind crashed.

*****Four days later, before the first Chunin exam*****

Team 7 entered the academy for the first test.

"You know something? This sucks!" Naruto was clearly annoyed as they walked past some people from the mist trying to get into room 201, disguised as 301, Distracted from their efforts, the mist ninja turned to look.

"What sucks?" Haku asked, a smirk on her face, Sasuke and Sakura had a similar smirk.

"The fact that I have to do this damn exam on my own! It's hardly fair.."

Sasuke noted the atmosphere change at his words, and decided to do some psychological warfare; "I agree. If they wanted it to be fair, I'd have gotten you drunk and shoved a dozen kunai in your back, then we'd have a decent handicap."

Naruto snorted. "Very funny Sasuke."

Jaws dropped and whispers were heard through the crowd, and not just from the mist ninja "On his own? How strong is he?"

"That's Sasuke Uchiha, that genius is asking for a handicap?"

"Who is that kid?"

"Hey, isn't that Naruto?" asked a more familiar voice, most likely a leaf ninja

"Can't be, he was the dead last from what I heard."

There were other such comments, but team 7 ignored them and proceeded to the third floor.

Jiraiya and Kakashi were stood outside room 301.

"Hello Ero-sennin, Kakashi-sensei." Naruto was quite calm and unsurprised by the appearance of the two. Haku giggled at the name Naruto had given a member of the Sannin.

Sasuke and Sakura looked at each other and laughed.

Jiraiya and Kakashi smirked in unison. _**'Yep, they're planning something evil.'**_


	12. Who knew the dead last was so good?

Finally got this up, 13 will be sometime soonish, i think

Chapter 12

Who knew the dead last was so good?

"Hey ero-sennin, how come you're here?"

The Sannin growled in annoyance "Stop Calling Me That!"

Team 7 further descended into a laughing fit, and Kakashi smirked_,_

'_Things have really gone well with the four of them'_ The Jonin thought. _'Things have changed amazingly in the past week. Sasuke's opened up about his brother to the rest of the team, Sakura has become less of a banshee, and I have Sasuke to thank for that. Haku has settled into the team incredibly, and although Naruto hasn't told his secret to the others yet, that's probably because he's been away for so long'_ Kakashi looked at the Sennin and his team_. 'I reckon that will change soon enough.'_

Naruto was shouting at Jiraiya, who was shouting back. Insults such as 'Pervert', 'one eyed Gaki', 'Old man', and 'Shorty' were traded, that being the last comment. At that point, Naruto developed a twitch in his eye and made a seal. Jiraiya was found two hours later, unconscious, floating upside down in the women's side of he hotsprings, a vital part of his anatomy damaged by a solid kick, the rest of his body had also taken damage involving twelve kunai, thirty-two of Haku's senbon, 17 ninja wires, 15 explosive tags, a passing hedgehog and Kakashi's spare headband. It became an S-class Kinjutsu named the Uzumaki torture, even Morino Ibiki winced at the thought of it, it was also thought Anko had a hand in it.

The damage inflicted upon the Sannin was so severe that even others suffered from the shockwave of the incredible attack. For example, Kakashi collapsed from laughing so hard, so team 7 just left their teacher on the floor where he lay. However, Sasuke took great care to step on their teacher as they walked on to the exam room. "Bit harsh Sasuke." Naruto commented.

Sasuke shrugged. "He tried to cut my hair."

The four of them laughed their backsides off all the way to the exam office. The room was filled with Genin of various ages; there was even a team that had to be at least twenty. Naruto took one look around, shrugged, and took a bottle of Sake out from the inside of his jacket and began to drink. People stared at him as if he had suddenly grown a second head.

Then the screaming on the roof started. Team 7 could hear Jiraiya screaming, as could the rest of the Genin. Some paled at the sounds, some merely shook their heads; one girl even fainted. The only distinct sentence was "That really shouldn't go there…", and this was accompanied by a snapping sound, and the screams became more distant.

Sasuke looked out the window and winced. "That was a good shot Naruto," the Uchiha noted, "I think Anko is there around this time."

Naruto grinned. "Awww yeah…" and took another swig of Sake.

Kiba walked up to Naruto and slapped his raised hand, "That, my good friend, was freaking immense!"

Hinata and Shino followed their teammate. Hinata just blushed upon sight of Naruto, Shino, was just Shino. _'That's right… I really should talk to her soon… I'm at my wits end dealing with two women as is; I doubt I could handle Hinata as well…'_

There was a blurry voice in the back of Naruto's head _**'I *hic* saw you *hic* set it up and *hic* I don't know how you *hic* did it.'**_

'_You're already drunk? Wow'_

'_**I'm still recovering *hic* from the *hic* 72 bottles last night *hic*'**_

'_Ah'_

"SASUKE-KUN!"

Sasuke sighed as he was glomped from the behind. He didn't move, he only replied "Hello Haku,"

"Erm… Sasuke?"

"What?"

"I'm right here." Haku waved while standing next to Naruto, opposite Sasuke.

"Eh?" This was a shocker for Sasuke. "Then..?"

"GET OFF HIM INO-PIG!"

"He's not yours!" Ino stuck her tongue out at Sakura while holding Sasuke tighter.

"Err, Yes He Is!"

"EH!?" Ino looked mortified. "SASUKE-KUN! Say it isn't so!!"

Sasuke leaned his head back so he could face her. "Actually, Yeah. I'm taken, have been for the last six weeks, i though i told everyone. Naruto's free if you're interested-"

Ino was thrown forward as Naruto punched Sasuke in the gut. However, Sasuke disappeared in a cloud of smoke. "Damn Naruto, you could have taken me out there."

Naruto's anger turned to astonishment. "When did you learn how to do that?"

Sasuke smiled. "Shadow clones? Easy." Ino and Sakura were even more impressed than Naruto. "I copied your little trick though. Never would've thought that it was a simple-"

Naruto quickly shut him up, but he disappeared again.

"Fine, I'll keep quiet about it; just remember I don't have your chakra." Sasuke was eating an energy bar. "Unlike you, I can't do it endlessly yet."

Ino was shocked, "Wh-Why would Sasuke Kun copy from a dunce like Naruto?"

"Because idiots are inventive."

Shikamaru and Chouji came to join their classmates. Shikamaru continued: "Last place knew more than he let on, but it didn't help him much did it?"

"Um… N-Naruto Kun h-has always been s-strong, ano… it-it's just that…"

"All the teachers had it in for him." Kiba finished her sentence for her.

"Iruka was alright, and it wasn't that bad!" _'Yeah it was'_ Naruto thought, _'but Iruka-sensei did try at least.'_

"He didn't hate you." Shikamaru corrected. "He still said you were a failure."

"The other teachers did seem to harbour a… Prejudice against Naruto." Shino noted.

"Yeah, you got into trouble way more than me and Shino put together!" Chouji added, temporarily leaving his snack to join the conversation. "Maybe even if you threw in Kiba you'd outrank us." Chouji returned to his chips. Told you it was temporary.

"Only to be expected from the joint Sannin of Pranks, and Failure of the Year!"

"C-Come on guys!" Naruto tried to fix his cover; Haku was looking suspicious; "It's not like they had a vendetta against me or anything!"

Sasuke caught his lie. "You're - " he began, but he paused to dodge Naruto's kick. Remembering his promise to help Naruto, Sasuke redirected his sentence; "-Dead!"

The two fought for almost a minute before Shikamaru interrupted it.

"Troublesome."

The reason that the lazy genin said this was because Gaara, Temari and Kankuro came over

"You're telling me…" was Naruto's reply, withdrawing his fist from Sasuke's face. Gaara, like before, was wearing a padded suit. His headband had been converted into a tie - serving no purpose other than looking rather badass. Like Naruto, he had a bottle of Sake in his hand, he lifted the bottle to emphasise it, "Really makes it easier."

"Doesn't it just?" replied Naruto, as everyone else stared in confusion.

Temari looked at Naruto, blushing slightly. Naruto, thinking of the night before he left Suna, blushed as well. Temari then looked at the rest of team 7, and blushed slightly upon sight of Haku. Temari simply nodded to her at this.

Sasuke winced a smile, as if a friend had just done something very painful and funny. Naruto, however, hid his outrage. _'You didn't!'_

'_**Foresight is a *Hic* beautiful thing'**_

Naruto drank more sake, '_She's gonna figure it out. And I won't stop her if she ever gets her hands on you.'_

'_**How's she, *Hic* How's she gonna do that then?'**_

'_Temari's smart. She'd work something out.'_

'_**That's fine. I'll just *Hic* tell her you got me drunk and told me to do it.'**_

Naruto sighed._ 'This is going to be a long day…'_

Sasuke leaned over to Naruto, whispering "This is going to be interesting…"

Naruto nodded, and drank some more. Temari and Haku were deep in conversation. Probably just girl talk.

Except Sakura, Ino and Hinata aren't invited.

And Haku looks like a dude with her hair like that.

And Temari started talking to her right after Kyube's arousal Jutsu affecter her with Haku.

And it's definitely girl talk.

And Temari knows that she isn't attracted to women.

But she does know that Kyuubi has that arousal Jutsu and likes to see others suffer.

And Temari is good at putting two and two together.

The two girls in question turned to Naruto; Temari glaring and Haku grinning.

Fuck

'_I am either very lucky, or very dead, door number 1 please.'_

'_**Awww *hic* yeah, I'm proud *hic* of you kit.'**_

_'How did you know id end up with Haku as well'_

_**'Advan *hic* ced physics'**  
_

Before Naruto could reply, a yell came across the room, "Shut up and come here for seating!!" It was a yell that was used to giving orders, and having them obeyed. Several Chunin examiners were stood at the front of the room, lead by one man Naruto never wanted to see again, that one time he had been deatained by ANBU for nicking this guys teddy bear.

Morino Ibiki.

The interrogation officer spotted Naruto and grinned. "Ah, so the infamous Sannin of the pranks is here!" Naruto took another drink of Sake, "Perhaps I won't be bored out of my skull today after all…" People looked between him and Naruto curiously as a murmur began throughout the room.

Naruto gulped, _'Why him?, anyone but him!'_ Kyube was mercifully silent, likely because he was dead drunk.

The exam was indeed fun. For starters, Haku was sat one side of Naruto and Temari the other, but also a Chunnin found himself short of his clipboard once the genin filed into the exam room. It never was found, probably because Naruto had it.

Holding it under the table, Naruto read it as Ibiki explained the so-called 'rules' of the exam. Naruto, having learned about his love for mind games long ago, ignored him and studied the clipboard.

The exam was a dud. Nine out of the ten questions were impossible for a genin to answer, and the tenth was a secret. The chart had the seating arrangements of the examinees, but there were three blank seats on the chart. Looking around, Naruto saw that they were occupied by Leaf Ninja, most likely confederates. Naruto frowned. This meant that they were getting marked on how well they cheated, the exam was a lie. Sighing, Naruto looked at his exam as he slipped a leaf into his mouth and began to chew.

'_**Huh? Whut?'"**_

Naruto smiled. The old man knew his stuff. The leaf had a chemical that made you sweat out the alcohol in your bloodstream. He'd stink of Sake, but he already did, so it was cool.

'_Hey, I need your help.'_

'_**Doing what?'**_

Naruto smiled. _'Doing what I do best. Raising Hell.'_

"BEGIN!!"

'_**Awww Yeah…'**_

Throughout the exam, hell was raised. In tiny, precise peaks, lifted carefully to make it impossible to determine who was doing it. The female sound nin found her bra on top of Ibiki's head, and no-one could figure out how the awkward situation came to pass. Akamaru found himself sat on Shikamaru minus his dog collar, which had been modified and put over Chouji's mouth and no one ever saw a thing. The collar took half an hour to remove. Even though she only jumped slightly Haku was given a wedgie, she was wearing his boxers again. Neji gained a paper crown, and Shino inexplicably gained an octopus mask, but gave no reaction as he continued the exam. Even Naruto got an egg rammed into his face.

When Ibiki asked if they were ready for the tenth question, he explained the rules and took off his head band. While this was all very intimidating, Naruto had to suppress the urge to say "Been there, done that, got the tiny little scar up my backside." Half the room fled, leaving the Konoha 13 (the original 12 and Haku), Gaara, Temari, Kankuro as well as a few teams from Iwa, one from rain, one from grass and one from Oto, plus a few others from Konoha as well.

"No one else leaving then, very we..."

It was at this point that a banner flew through the window and was pinned to the roof and floor by Kunai. However, no one was able to read the banner as it was instantly covered in spray paint displaying the words; "SUCKS TO BE YOU!" The Kunoichi that came through the window was upset to say the least. When she saw Naruto she grinned, quite sadistically, "This is going to be fun".

Ibiki picked Naruto's exam paper he looked at the paper, interested in how the boy did. It was obvious that boy had pulled all those pranks; a lesser ninja would have been fooled when Naruto egged himself, but it was obvious that no-one else had the balls or imagination to pull that off. His scarred jaw dropped as he saw what was written on the paper.

_Every question was correct._

Not copied, that was clear. Each answer was in the boys own words, his distinct sense of humour was evident in his answers. The paper showed his working out, and the fact that the boy missed out key words only help prove the authenticity of his answers. He noticed a note just beneath the tenth question. "P.T.O.?"  
Ibiki turned over the exam paper, and his eye twitched.  
The boy had made a very detailed drawing of a right hand, covering almost the entire A4 page, its middle finger pointed straight at his face. The word 'Owned' was drawn on the back of the hand like a tattoo, and despite the insolence it showed, the detail of the sketch would have taken an artist the better part of an hour.  
_'So how the hell have time to do the exam and the pranks as well as the drawing?'_  
Ibiki sensed that he had just met a truly amazing ninja.

That, night, Naruto stood in the shower in his apartment, his demon eye was uncovered. _'This next one is going to be tough.'_ He thought about what Anko had said.

After Anko had taken the remaining teams from the first exam room she had given the teams a meeting place and time for the morning so she could take them to the second exam location. She told them what equipment they would need, and the list said no food, and cheating teams would be disqualified. _'Survival test then.' _Naruto thought when he heard this. _'Hope I recognise the plants there…'_

Naruto then heard a sound which pulled him out of his memory. _'Not good.'_

Someone had dropped something on the floor and Naruto was pretty sure he knew who. He closed his right eye and sighed, bracing himself for the impact. He wasn't disappointed, as someone had joined him in the shower and said person was also hugging him from behind, his face went red as he felt that person's breasts push against his back.

"Hello Haku…" Frustration laced Naruto's words. He felt a chill down his spine despite the hot water, _'Not good at all.'_

"Awww, what's wrong?"

"Uh... you should...uh"

Haku giggled.

'_**At this point kit you turn around, push her into the wall an...'**_ Kyube trailed away as Naruto tuned him out.

He then realised his big mistake, whilst he wasn't paying attention, Haku had slid around and had him by the waist, she was looking at him with a grin and Naruto's nose had a small trickle of blood, his right eye was still closed. His left eye, however, was very open.

"You know, you can see better with two eyes." Haku pointed out. "Come on, open up!"

"No." He replied, desperately trying not to look down.

Even though he said that, he did nothing as she moved her hand up to his eye; her hand hovered just in front of the eye, uncertainty in hers.

Naruto sighed in defeat and opened his eye. Haku's hand dropped to her side, jaw dropping, and a scream he thought was 'cute, if not terrified'.

Naruto sighed and stepped out of the shower, wrapping a towel around his waist. _'If she's like that about the eye, how'll she react to Kyube?' _Naruto opened the door and stepped into the hallway as his train of thought continued;_ 'And for that matter, how will everyone else?'_

He was interrupted as he felt a hand grab his shoulder and spin him around before Haku kissed him, pushing him to the floor. _'Well, this worked out alright' _

Even after Haku had released him she kept hugging him. "Thanks Naruto…"

Naruto just lay underneath her. _'Wait, she grateful?' _Made sense actually, even Kakashi was shocked to first see his eye, but Naruto had actually let her in there. Even Temari forced it out of him. This brought forward another question; _'When do I tell them all?'_

"Oh!" Haku derailed his train of thought. "Naruto's a pervert!" She said, reaching down for his towel. Panicking, Naruto disappeared in a cloud of smoke and Haku fell a couple of inches onto the floor. "Hey, No Fair!"

"Neither is surprise shower buddies." Naruto, plus pants, was walked out of his room pulling a shirt on. "I'm gonna get ready for tomorrow," He continued, "Want me to pack for you while you shower?"

Mist was coming out of the bathroom as Haku stood up, unashamed. "Yeah, I guess." She turned back into the bathroom and looked back at the blonde. "Nice belly tattoo by the way." She said, closing the door behind her.

Naruto paled as the demon laughed. _**'You're good Kit,'**_ Kyube noted between the laughter, _**'But you're not that good yet.'**_

Meanwhile, thousands of metres away in the Konoha guest barracks, Gaara was having a panic attack. "Thiscan'tbehappeningthiscan'tbehappeningTHISCAN'TBEHAPPENING!"

'_**Well it is, so live with it.'**_

"SHUTUP! Notgoodnotgoodnotgood…"

Temari and Kankuro were helpless to help their brother. "Is, Is he talking to, _it_?"

"Probably," Temari answered her younger brother. "We have no idea what Naruto taught him apart from Taijutsu and human emotion…"

Kankuro sighed, "Well, at least he's resisting it." He fell back onto his bed. "But man, that was a shocker."

His sister nodded. "He told me back home," She said, "But I didn't believe it I saw how the other Konoha were treating him…"

"I mean come on!" Kankuro flipped forward. "He completely schooled the full on demonic Gaara, He mastered Wind Jutsu in a couple of weeks, He's got that Kage Bunshin trick, He's a decent fighter, immense chakra, He's the Jinchuriki to the strongest of the tailed demons, he's only got one eye," He missed Temari's flash of guilt "and he's ranked LAST PLACE!? HOW THE HELL!?"

"IT'S NOT POSSIBLE! NARUTO'S STRONG DAMMIT!!" Gaara seemed to be getting worse, and Kankuro was starting to join him.

Sighing, Temari picked up her fan and swung it. The wind threw her two brothers across the room, and they were stunned into silence. Glaring at her younger siblings, Temari set things strait. "So What if he's last place? There could be any number of reasons!" Temari sat down on one of the beds while the two brothers shifted into a cross legged position, like students in front of a teacher.

"Actually, they called him the Sannin of pranks right?" Kankuro noted, "So he could have just spent all of his energy doing that instead?"

"Yeah," Gaara nodded, "That fits."

"No it doesn't." Temari shook her head. "Naruto's not like that." She pieced together what she knew about him, from his own account, the way others treat him, and from a very informative Haku. Temari frowned, but that could wait. Combined with her experience with Gaara, she came up with a theory.

"Naruto's an Orphan. On top of that, no-one knows anything about his birth, except he was born when the nine-tailed fox attacked the village, and that the Yondaime died sealing it into him. But no-one told him until he was twelve… There's a law here forbidding the discussion of it to anyone, unless Naruto initiates the topic specifically. Because of that, parents probably just told their kids to stay away from him." She paused, her frown furrowing deeper. "On top of that, the adults treated him like dirt. Gaara was treat okay since he was the Kazekage's son, then gained fear as he began to kill." Gaara nodded at this, as his sister continued, "But Naruto was just the orphan- no, the demon fox whose existence they had to tolerate, so they mostly ignored him or abused him. Naruto couldn't understand why no-one liked him, so since he couldn't get affection, he settled for attention."

"Like how I settled for fear…"

Temari nodded. "Yeah, Naruto was just like you, but he found another outlet. But if you combine the fact that the entire village hated him with the fact that he was also a prankster, it's no wonder if the teachers never actually helped him with the basic academy. In fact," Temari's frown turned to… sadness? "It's no surprise if the teachers sabotaged his growth. And if the Kyuubi was his main teacher, he probably his the demon's power in case he got caught, so the only ones that know he's any good are us and his team."

After a few moments, Kankuro stood up. "Actually, that makes sense. His starting form looked forced, as if he'd only just learnt it recently, most of his fighting was sloppy and wild, as if he'd learnt it in schoolyard brawls." He then leaned against the wall, head tilted to one side. "Actually, He didn't even seem to know most basic Jutsu."

"Every Village has their own Jutsu Kankuro."

"Yeah, but every Genin can create illusionary clones. Not Naruto." Kankuro smiled. "Only cloning he can do is a high level Kage Bunshin he taught himself. It's not that he doesn't use low level techniques, he actually _can't_ use low level techniques."

'_**Just like you.'**_

Gaara stood up, sighing. He reached into the fridge for some alcohol.

"Another one?" Temari asked. "It's no good for you, you know."

"Pass us a cold one."

Gaara tossed a can to his older brother, emerging from the fridge with his own. Opening it, he simply remarked "It shuts up Shukaku."

'_**Alchie.'**_

*****The next day, outside the forest of death*****

Anko was grinning like a madman, err… woman. For example, she just flashed team 7 a few seconds ago. Well, half of it, Sasuke and Sakura were looking away, no prizes for guessing where their attention was. Naruto should have been stunned, but for some reason he was only mildly shocked. _'Am I getting desensitised?'_

'_**Doubt it, Seen better.'**_

Haku, on the other hand had a nose bleed; Anko took the chance to cop a feel._ 'Yup, female. Thought so, but it's not so easy to tell, that is one really baggy top.'_

She whispered something into Haku's ear, who blushed before whispering back. Anko walked away with a smirk Naruto did not like.

After the signing of forms, the removal of some of Naruto's blood, one really long tongue, the distribution of scrolls and the splitting of teams, the gates opened and the other teams rushed in. Naruto felt someone slip something into his pocket. It was a small scroll. Naruto read it, laughed, and walked into the forest of death alone.

*****In the forest of death*****

**With the Suna Team**

Once they had cleared some distance into the forest, Temari veered off to the right and made hand signs over her shoulder, indicating 'This Way'

Gaara and Kankuro just shrugged and followed.

**With Team 7**

Sasuke led Haku and Sakura about a mile into the forest before Haku stopped the team. She explained the plan to them, and they both grinned.

**About an hour later**

Team 7 and the sand siblings had found each other, and were waiting for Naruto to show up. After it was confirmed that both teams had the Heaven Scroll, they all agreed to the alliance that had been set up.

Eventually, Sasuke felt his hair get scuffle. "Naruto, why are you on my head?"

Naruto handed him a piece of paper. "Check it out."

_Naruto Meet us on Sasuke's head. Haku and Temari  
_

Sasuke read what was written and sighed, "Sometimes I just don't get women."

Naruto sidestepped as Sasuke was punched into a tree by Sakura, who looked for Naruto. Reaching above her head, she grabbed Naruto's ankle and smashed him into the ground.

"Ow…"

Naruto got up, dusted himself and handed Gaara the note. Kankuro read at the note over his brother's shoulder, and they both laughed.

Sasuke got up and explained to Sakura what the note contained, her now being the only one now out of the loop. Sakura glared at Haku and Temari, who grinned. "Honestly…" She said, picking the twigs and dirt out of Sasuke's hair.

Naruto looked around the group. All seemed right in the worl-

"GUH!"

Naruto looked behind him and saw a half a dozen senbon in his back. As the world grew dark, he saw Temari approach him, pure murder on her face.

'_Sucks to be me…'_ He thought, as he lost conciousness and fell to the ground.

Temari picked up the unconscious ninja and hoisted him over his shoulder. She faced the other four genin and simply said "Excuse us…" as she walked into the trees with Haku.

After a moment, Sakura asked the important question. "What the hell? I thought she liked him!?"

"I know." Sasuke sighed, deciding that Naruto was in large pile of crap, so coming clean now would minimise his pile later. "That's the problem."

Gaara was confused. "I thought Naruto and Temari were dating..?"

"EH?" Sakura was stunned. "I thought he was going out with Haku!?"

There was silence for a moment, and then Sasuke simply said. "You're both right. Then they found out. I warned him this would happen, but he was all like _no, I like them both!_ You gotta hand it to him, he's got balls."

"Wait, WHAT!?" Kankuro was outraged. "I'll kill him."

Sasuke shrugged. "Looks like your sister beat you to it."

"Man, this sucks."

"_Actually, this is pretty awesome!"_

Naruto looked around, finding himself back in the Kyuubi's lair. He punched him.

"_OW! Hey!"_

"SHUT UP! THIS IS YOUR FAULT!"

"_And how?"_

"You just HAD to use the arousal Jutsu to make Temari attracted to Haku didn't you? Didn't you realise that she'd put two and two together and figure out that you were screwing with her again?"

"_Yep."_

"…Then…Why..?"

"_You'll see…"_ as the world turned black again.

"Yeah… I think we might have overdone it Temari…"  
"It's called Irony. He invented it."

"Uzumaki Torture uses a hedgehog Temari, not a flying pirate sickle…weasel…thing… what is that anyway?"

"Kamatari, Summon Jutsu."

"That's even worse! You could've killed him!"

Temari shook her head. "He'd be fine. He heals fast, remember?"

Haku was surprised at this, "Really? Why?"

Now it was Temari's turn. "You don't know?"

Haku shook her head. "Something to do with his eye?"

Before she could respond, Naruto did. "Oww…"

"Oh look, the lying, cheating scumbag's awake."

"In my defence, I didn't lie about this-"

Haku kicked him in the chest. "But you admit that you are a liar."

'_I'm a ninja; of course I lie.'_ But self perseveration told him to keep his mouth shut.

'_**Wise move Kit.'**_

'_Shut up.'_

Temari leaned against a tree. "Well? Aren't you going to explain yourself? And don't you dare blame your little friend."

Naruto blanked for a moment, desperately grasping for an excuse. Twelve years of excuses and he had none. Then he realised something. _'She used guarded language.' _He thought. _'She's keeping quiet about Kyube, so I can still save my ass.'_

'_**It's the 'how' that's important Kit. How are you going to save your ass?'**_

Naruto didn't even bother blocking out the fox. Or excusing himself. "First off, both of you came on to _me_. Yeah, I didn't say no, come on! I'm Twelve years old! You expect me to be able to say no?"

"He has got a point." Haku noted, as Temari almost chocked.

"TWELVE!?"

Naruto blinked. "Err… Yeah?"

Temari regained control of her self. "Fine then, but why all the secrets? Why not just come forward and say so in the first place. You didn't even ask if we were okay with you dating us both."

"Sorry, but- Wait, WHAT!?"

"For the record," Haku put in, "I am."

"Wait, WHAT!?"

_**'It worked, Awww yeah**__**'**_

Haku simply looked smug, and Temari smiled. Naruto got the hint. "Erm… Are you..?"

Temari shrugged. "Go on then."

Haku jumped into the air. "YAY! THREESOME!"

The sound rocked through the forest.

"YAY! THREESOME!"

TenTen almost tripped over the unconscious Rain Ninja. "WHAT?"

Neji shrugged. "Some People have no priorities."

"What are you talking about Neji Kun?" Rock Lee struck a pose. "It is simple the power of-"

"Say Youth and I'll kick your ass."

Rock Lee shut up.

"YAY! THREESOME!"

Team 10 paused. They were trailing some weaker looking ninja. Shikamaru shook his head and Ino sighed. "Ah, Me, Sasuke Kun and Sakura… That'd be nice…"

Chouji choked on the crisp he was eating, wiping the blood from his nose.

Shikamaru grunted. "Who in their right minds would try to deal with two women at once? Too troublesome…"

"YAY! THREESOME!"

A grass nin heard this and smiled. He began to rush through the forest in that direction.

"YAY! THREESOME!"

Sasuke's, Sakura's and Kunkuro's jaws dropped simultaneously. How the hell had he managed to pull it off?

Gaara smiled. "Hey, Naruto's got balls."

Sasuke shook his head. "Made from Cast Iron…"

"YAY! THREESOME!"

"No."

"Aw… Come on Tems!"

Temari was taken aback. "Did you just call me Tems?"

Haku shrugged. "We're sharing the same man now aren't we? That practically makes us sisters or something!"

Temari sighed. "Fine, whatever. Come on, we should get moving. You probably told half the forest where we were with that."

Haku flinched as Temari cut Naruto loose. "Sorry about that."

"That's not all actually…" Temari looked concerned as she got to work fixing the damage. "I think you broke him."

Sure enough, Naruto looked like his brain just broke. He had a double barrel nosebleed, but that was only to be expected after what he'd just imagined. Actually, Temari was more worried about what the Kyuubi had imagined and shown him, which was probably what made him go into shock. Temari sighed_, 'He really is just a kid…'_

"_All thanks to me."_

"Shut up Kyube, you had no idea this was going to happen."

"_Either way, now you have your very own-"_

"I'm leaving now. I'm on a mission, remember?"

**Several hours later**

Thanks to Naruto's tracking skills and Gaara's sand, the seven genin quickly obtained two earth scrolls, meaning that all they needed was a heaven scroll for Naruto. That's when things went downhill, as a giant snake dived out from the canopy as the group dashed across the tree branches. Naruto suddenly found himself on the forest floor, staring into the eyes of a giant snake.

'_This can't be good.'_


	13. Snakes in the forest

Thank you to everyone who has reviewed so far

harlequin320 - The main force behind Kyube is Samjaz, he had the comedy skills, also, haku is way better female

scione - All i can say is sorry, i was gonna make it anko, Samjaz convinced me otherwise, although we do have potentiol funnies for that

Chapter 13

Snakes in the forest

Naruto found himself staring into the eyes of the giant snake crushing the lower half of his body.

"I hate snakes''

'_**Then close your eyes, maybe you won't notice it.'**_

Naruto rolled his eye as his hand came up and moved the headband revealing his demon eye. The serpent shuddered and vanished in a cloud of smoke. Naruto quickly replaced his headband.

'_That one's useful.'_

'_**Comes with being the leader of the fox clan and the king of the tailed beasts. All but the strongest of summons can be dispelled by me, or you.'**_

'_Nice' _

The sound of battle came from the treetops, and something wet and warm dropped onto Naruto's lap. Pulling himself up, he found it was half of a lung. Grabbing it, it felt gritty in Naruto's hands, as blood rained down in the forest and other body parts fell to the floor.

'_Gaara must be having fun.'_

'_**I prefer fire myse-.'**_ The Kyuubi stopped midsentence.

'_What's wrong?'_

'_**There's a Sannin level ninja nearby. He'd be troublesome even for me.'**_

'_Is he a threat?'_

'_**Wouldn't have brought it up if he wasn't Kit. Orochimaru, you know about him?'**_

'_Wasn't he Ero-Sensei's old teammate who left the Leaf and founded the Sound?'_

'_**That's the one. He's headed for your girlfriends, up there.'**_

Naruto was up and jumping into the treetops.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Well this is fun." Sasuke was grinning like a mad clown, which faded as a sand spike missed his face by an inch. "Okay, okay, no time for jokes, I get it…"

The battle was fierce, Ninja wearing Oto headbands had the group of Leaf and Sand nin's surrounded and they kept on the attack; every time one of the Oto died, another replaced him.

Naruto dashed to the edge of the battle.

'_I can't smell them, I can't even hear them...'_

'_**I can. It's an incredible Genjutsu, which is probably why I noticed it. Someone's playing a song that's messing with your senses Kit.'**_

'_Anything we can do?'_

'_**Kill them all.'**_

'_Me like.'_

'_**Me too.'**_

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX_**  
**_

Haku stood and watched as her boyfriend showed a power she had never seen before. Naruto dove into the fight, Black flames shooting out of his palm incinerating most of the Oto Nin to ashes. He then drew Kitsune and destroyed over twenty trees with a single slash, alongside the remaining Sound Ninja. Temari looked at Haku as she watched in awe. _'She might need some new pants,' _Temari thought, noticing the light stain appear amongst the darkness of the blood,_ 'But if she does that from watching him kick ass then what happens in...'_ Temari let out a perverted giggle.

Everyone looked at her, Gaara raising an eyebrow. Temari blushed and gave a small shrug.

"Honestly…" Naruto turned to face the rest of the group. "I leave for five minutes and…"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The team had set up camp a mile away from where the Oto Nin had ambushed them. Naruto looked thoughtful and then spoke, "I guess we kind of need a guar..." Naruto suddenly collapsed, blood seeping from that eye.

Temari and Haku both caught him. "What The Hell!?" Haku was in near hysterics, "What Happened To Him!?"

"He's fine, just exhausted." Gaara's voice cut across the camp. "That black flame was three separate hells of a move."

Temari moved Naruto over to the side of the camp before taking his headband off.

Sasuke and Sakura tried to get a look at his eye; they were stopped by sand approaching them menacingly.

"He'll tell you when he's ready. As far as I'm aware only a few have seen it… I fought him when he uncovered his eye and it is not an experience I wish to repeat."

Haku and Sakura both stared at Gaara, while Sasuke only showed mild surprise. "He fought you?"

Gaara nodded, "At my full strength, I think he only showed a fraction of his power."

Stares widened and Sasuke nodded. "So which one do you have?"

Gaara's jaw dropped, "One tai- uh, how did you..?"

"Your control over sand."

Gaara gave a small chuckle.

Conversation stopped at the next sentence.

"My head hurts.... again." Naruto was awake and clutching his head. Haku tackled him and wrapped her arms around him.

Temari just took some medication out and rammed it down his throat, "That's for making everyone else worry."

Tears streamed out of Naruto's left eye as he began choking. Temari rolled him and Haku over and slapped him on his back. He swallows and sighed, "Not nice Tem-chan."

At Temari's look Haku began to giggle, Temari glared at Haku, who pushed Naruto off her and sat next to Temari, Looking in at the camp.

"Don't you even dare."

"Spoilsport." Haku pouted

"That's enough you two." Naruto stood up and turned towards Temari and Haku, away from everyone else. They both glared at him, He put his hands up defensively, "I just don't want you two fighting." Naruto turned to the others, looking for a way out. "So, Sasuke, what's…up…"

Sakura looked horrified, while Sasuke just smirked. "No wonder you keep that hidden."

Naruto looked confused until his hand rose to his right eye. A look of realization showed on his face. "Not good…"

Haku spoke up, "I think it's kinda cute."

"You would..." Temari noted. Haku giggled, Naruto sighed, "Troublesome."

Everyone laughed while Naruto stood and retrieved his headband from Temari in a huff. "When we get to the tower I'll tell you all everything." He repositioned it between his right eye and his Konoha headband. "While I'm at it, I might as well tell you _Everything._" Everyone looked at him curiously, so he elaborated; "How I got it, What's the deal with it, Why my parents are dead, Why the whole village hates me, and why the hell Sasuke's so suspicious of me."

"Finally," Sasuke replies, standing up, "I want to know whether I won my million ryo or not."

Kankuro looked up, "You made a bet with someone about this?"

Sasuke looked offended by the idea. "You never seen 'Who want's to be a Millionaire?"

The middle sand sibling smiled. They got that show in the Suna too. "What's option 'A'?"

Sasuke smirked. "I picked 'C', but 'A' is that Naruto's an asshole."

Temari stood up. "You just won a million ryo."

That got everyone laughing, Naruto stuck his tongue out at her and pulled his left eyelid down. _'This just got even more interesting.'_

'_**There is one upside.'**_

'_What?'_

'_**After explaining the side effects, your girls won't let you leave that tower a...'**_

'_Stop being a pervert.'_

'_**You get some action and I won't need to.'**_

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX_**  
**_

Naruto stared up at the sky; he was lying on his back on the tower's rooftop; he'd taken off his headband and stared at the sky with both eyes visible. Temari and Haku were either side of him, asleep; he had an arm around each of them; it had taken almost two days for them to retrieve the needed scrolls and get to the tower. They'd arrived six hours earlier and he had told them everything after the medical exam.

Well almost everything. he left out a name, sort of, he wasn't sure, he had forgetten to ask, _'was it you Kakashi-sensei?'_

_**Flashback – 5 hours ago**_

The group were sat around Naruto, filling Naruto's room in the tower. They had arrived an hour earlier and had rested before meeting up.

Everyone looked at Naruto expectantly, who sighed, "You guys all know what happened the day I was born right?"

Sakura came out with the answer Naruto wanted. "The Yondaime killed the Kyuubi right?" For effect of course.

"Wrong."

"Huh,? but that's what they told us in the Academy." Sakura frowned at Naruto, like it was his fault.

"That's the story the third gave them, the older generation know the truth."

"Hence the hate the council and the other adults have for you." Sasuke's voice held no trace of confusion; Haku looked shocked and Sakura, Confused.

Naruto nodded "You've caught on. Sakura," He asked, "do you know how to kill a tailed beast?"

Sakura shrugged, "No."

"You can't," Naruto explained, "You can seal it but you can't kill it."

Sakura's eyes went wide as realisation hit, "He sealed it inside of you…."

"Yup, that's why I lived on the streets from when I was two years old to when I was seven. I don't remember much from back then, though one person can tell you."

"Who?" The question was asked by everyone but Gaara.

"Shikamaru."

Even Sasuke was surprised at this, "Wow."

"When I was eight I was nearly cut in half by a drunken Anbu who was killed by another Anbu with a dog mask. who I don't actually know who that was, but Kakashi-sensei does. Anyway, that's when I was first contacted by Kyube,"

"Who?" Everyone looked confused.

"Kyube." Naruto explained, "It's my nickname for the Kyuubi. He calls me Kit." Everyone looked confused but they understood. "I got the eye when I was twelve, after I failed the Genin exams. Kyube trained me in between."

Gaara spoke up, "So what other effect did it have on you?"

Naruto smirked, "Since I was eight my body began ageing at double the rate. Thankfully, I noticed last year and we got that fixed. We also control my height, which can be what it should be when I want, somewhere near six foot."

Temari did the math. "So, Physiologically you're fifteen to sixteen?"

Naruto nodded "Brain aged as well, so that changed how I think as well."

Two people in the room began thinking perversely simultaneously. One demon was doing this the whole time.

_**End flashback**_

'_**Orochimaru is still hanging around, and from what I can sense, he is very annoyed.'**_

'_What does he want?'_

'_**We need more information before we begin theorizing.'**_

'_Wow, you can use big words.'_

'_**Shut up you little son of a....'**_

Naruto was aware of a person approaching, though he didn't bother to hide his eye. He recognised the chakra signature.

"Your friends are so troublesome"

Naruto sat and turned to the speaker. "What's up Shikamaru?"

Shikamaru sat near to Naruto.

"A while ago I was ambushed by Sakura and Sasuke, interrogating me about how I knew more of your past than you did."

Naruto nodded, "What did you tell them?"

Shikamaru looked down, "Just that I found you in an alleyway when you were three and that I helped you when you needed it and still do."

"Thanks."

Shikamaru nodded. "How's our friend?"

"Shouting rude words at the minute."

Shikamaru gave a small laugh.

"See Temari likes you as well."

"Yeah, having two girlfriends is going to be...."

"Troublesome."

"Yup."

The two fell silent for a while.

"You finished that technique you were working on yet?" Naruto broke the silence.

"Yeah, I might use it in the finals."

"So, are we both are going to go all-out?"

"Troublesome."

"I'll take that as a yes then."

Shikamaru looked at Naruto, "How do you feel about them?"

Naruto looked at the sky for a moment, a contemplative look on his face before he replied, "If something happened, to either of them, I don't know what I'd do." He took a deep breath. "I've not known either of them for that long, yet....." Naruto trailed off looking at the sky.

Shikamaru gave a chuckle, "You never were good with your emotions were you?"

Naruto gave a small laugh, "The positive ones anyway."

Shikamaru looked at the stars for a few moments before he left.

'_What do I feel for them? Temari only started liking me because of Kyube, and Haku because I showed her some kindness, yet they both became so close to me.' _

Kyuubi remained silent. Naruto fell asleep with the same thoughts going around in his head.


	14. Feelings

**Here is chapter 14, finally, this is mainly samjaz, he wrote the fight scenes, and i think he did a brilliant job, only the first scene was my work.**

Chapter 14

Feelings

Naruto awoke cursing the sunlight that hit his eyes. He could feel something was missing; but he struggled to work out anything with a brain that wasn't working yet.

'_It feels colder than when I went to sleep, my head feels wrong.'_

He struggled to open his eyes and it hit him, like a bucket of water. Which also hit him like a bucket of water.

'_So. Cold, wet, and no Temari or Haku. Troublesome."_

'_**Bad kit, no turning into Shikamaru now.'**_

'_That would indeed be bad.'_

Two people stood over Naruto; he could make out the blurry outlines. The one the right was clearer than the left one.

He blinked rapidly and Jiraiya and Kakashi came into focus, Jiraiya stood at his right seemed to be in better focus then Kakashi on his left_. 'I wonder why.'_

"Oi! Gaki! You awake?" The sentence was followed by a kick to his right side from Jiraiya and a giggle from Kakashi who had his book in hand.

Naruto sighed and sat up, "Whatever gave you that idea..?"

The two giggled and sat down either side of him. Kakashi spoke "Now about those two girlfriends of yours…"

Naruto groaned and pulled out a bottle of Sake from his jacket.

Jiraiya's eyes went wide, "How much of that stuff do you have in there."

Naruto gave a chuckle, "One more than limitless."

Jiraiya was stumped so Kakashi cut in, "About the conversation with Shikamaru last night?"

Naruto had a faraway look in both eyes "Which bit?"

Kakashi paused for a moment, "About your feelings for Haku and the Suna girl."

Naruto looked up at the sky, "It's something I've never felt before." He paused "If anything happened to them I... feel like I'd die, but…" Naruto sighed. "I… I can't..... Understand it."

Jiraiya had a gleam in his eyes, "This is good…"

Naruto looked up at the grinning sage. "You've fallen for them. Naruto, the one eyed enigma, in love with the girl he brought back from a monster and the girl from a far away land." He gave a perverted giggle and took out his note book.

Naruto closed his eyes, letting out a long sigh, "Love… you really think?"

Kakashi put a hand on Naruto's shoulder, "Without a doubt, you've fallen in love with both of them, they've fallen for you." He leaned towards his pupil's ear. "Also, try to read the signs between them; it might give you a greater insight."

Naruto nodded, "Thanks, that helped a lot." He paused for a moment, his hand going to his head. "Where's my headband and forehead protector?"

Jiraiya smirked, "Ask your girlfriends."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx_  
_

The next day, Naruto felt awful. He didn't get any sleep last night, and he had a hangover.

"_**It's your own fault dammit! The chance was there and you walked away!"**_

'_The council would have just spun it against me somehow…'_

"_**You say that, but we both know you just have no balls."**_

'_Shut up…'_ Naruto reached for a bottle of Sake that wasn't there. _'Dammit… I drank that much?'_

Naruto struggled to listen to the proctor Hayate's orders, but it was hard enough to just stand. In fact, it was. The only reason he was still vertical was because Shikamaru noticed and got him in a Shadow Jutsu. All Naruto knew was that he had to beat his opponent. Easy enough…

"Alright… Our first contestants are… Shino and Zaku! Everyone else to the stands!"

Everyone except the bug user, the sound ninja, and Naruto left the arena.

"NARUTO!"

"Buh, wha? Oh, right…" Naruto trudged towards the stairs and climbed up, sitting against the walls once he reached the top.

"Naruto," Temari asked. "You okay?"

SNORE

"Presumably…" Haku answered. "Hey, fight!"

The two ninjas faced each other. The sound ninja shifted into a stance, legs braced and palms facing Shino. There was a small hole in each hand. "YOU READY!?"

Shino, however, just stood there with his hands in his pockets. "This match had been decided. I would advise you to forfeit."

"What?" Zaku laughed. "You got some nerve. Check this out! THUNDER SOUND BLAST!"

A shockwave blasted out of his hand, knocking Shino flying. "SHINO KUN!" Cried Hinata.

Zaku grinned. However, the smile faded as Shino stood up unfazed. "The intelligent thing to do now," Shino told him, "Would be to surrender, as you're surrounded."

"I only see you buddy!" Zaku told him, as a bug landed on his forearm. "Gerrof!" he said, but stopped as he noticed the cloud of insects surrounding him. "Wh-what!"

"Like I said. Surrender or perish."

Snarling, Zaku crossed his arms and started building up chakra. "SONIC BOOM!"

There was an explosion, and a spattering of blood. "GAARRGGHH!!"

"I did warn you." Shino said monotonously. Zaku's sound pipes in his arms were blocked by Shino's insects, so the built up pressure exploded his arms. Unfortunately, the explosion was near his chest, so as the smoke cleared, you could see white amongst the red; shards of ribcage poked through the sides of the cavity that used to be his chest. One lung was torn, another almost completely destroyed, but they preserved his heart, which still was not visible and still beating strongly: pumping blood into the hole that used to be his chest.

"Wha.. Is… IS THAT!?" Zaku was still conscious. "Ho-holy shh…" he fainted.

"The winner is Shino." Hayate declared, as sickened murmurs filled the room. "Medics, get him out of here."

Medic Nin's rushed the sound nin onto a stretcher as Shino walked away.

"Alright, the next match is…" Hayate looked at the computer screen. "Sasuke Uchiha and Yoroi Akado!"

"Nice!" Sasuke jumped onto the bloodstained floor, grinning. Yoroi, on the other hand, walked leisurely onto the arena.

"Amazing… I didn't even have to beg to fight you."

"Sorry, but you're in the way of the people I _Really _want to fight."

"COUGH! Begin."

Sasuke charged forward, dodging past the Kunai and Shuriken, Sharingan spinning. Fire covered his fist as he prepared to strike, but the Uchiha was caught in the face by Yoroi, and the fire died.

"This is my Chakra absorption Jutsu…" the leaf nin said. "You like it?"

Sasuke didn't get chance to answer, however, as he vanished in a puff of smoke. "WHAT!? SHADOW CLONE!?" Yoroi spun around. "Then he's-!?"

Hands grabbed his face from behind. "Thanks for that skill." Sasuke whispered from behind. "Payback's a bitch, isn't it?"

Yoroi didn't get chance to answer, however, as he slumped to the ground, unconscious. "Winner, Sasuke!"

"Damn man!" Gaara slapped Sasuke's hi-five as he returned to the top. "That was skill!"

"Thanks." Smiled the Uchiha, slipping Sakura a quick kiss on the cheek, hugging her. he was disappointed, however, that Naruto was asleep through the whole thing.

"_**I saw it if it makes you feel better."**_

Sasuke stopped with a start. _'The hell?'_

"_**You're better conversation than Kit over here, so I'll bore you for now Uchiha."**_

'_Okay then..?'_

"_**Good. So who we cheering for?"**_

Shikamaru and a sound nin named Kin had entered the arena. Shikamaru sighed. "Well, this is troublesome…"

"You don't say?"

"No, it's just normally I hold them down while Chouji beats them up, or Ino mind rapes them…"

"_**Ooh, I know that kid. Hundred ryo on him."**_

'_You don't have a hundred ryo, do you?' _Sasuke honestly didn't know what to expect, nor was he used to this sensation. _'Does Naruto feel like this all the time?'_

"_**Probably. And Kit does."**_

"I guess that it can't be helped." Shikamaru crouched down, placing his fingers together in a circle. "I was hoping to save this for Naruto, but since he's asleep right now, I reckon that I'll be alright."

"HAH! Bring it on!"

The temperature in the room fell as the shadows gathered around Shikamaru. The shadows crawled into his hands, coiling to form an unearthly black ball of darkness, that slowly span and span until it made a perfect sphere.

Then it opened an eye.

A twisted, wrong eye that bent and curved like a four year olds idea of a snake, opened on the black ball, revealing a blue ringed iris. The ball twisted and curved to face her. her face contorted with disgust as a second eye opened on the sphere. Disgust turned to fear as a manic, insane grin, that could only be described as human, yet not human at the same time, grew upon the dark orb. The grinning sphere then span, uncurling itself into nothingness.

"That…" Kin shook herself, getting her head back on straight. "That was downright creepy, but what the hell was it supposed to achieve?"

**THIS**

Kin watch with horror as darkness rose from the ground, filling the space around him like black fins of death.

Then the eyes and smiles opened.

Not like before. Before made a face. Now they were just spread randomly around the sheet of blackness. It was clear: what ever that leaf ninja was doing, he was creating something that should not be.

The darkness then fell back the ground and rose up into Shikamaru's jacket. "Now it begins." He said with a smile on his face.

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**Shikamaru is the pet project of samjaz in this story, he wants to make him badass, his power, you'll have to wait till next chapter**.


	15. True power

**Short chapter, i am currently writing chapter 16 so hopefully it will be done soon, up next week most likely, Credit to Samjaz for his work on this chapter.**

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Chapter 15

True Power

"You….You think you can freak me out with some kind of Genjutsu?" Kin stammered, trying to hide the fear of the abomination she had just seen.

"Genjutsu?" Shikamaru seemed offended. "Look, I'm the Shika in the new Ino-Shika-Cho unit." The Nara scratched his head. "I only use Ninjutsu, so why would I bother with anything so… troublesome as Genjutsu?"

"Why are you telling me this?" his opponent asked. "Aren't you getting over confident, revealing your secrets?"

"Actually, I was hoping you'd forfeit. See," Shikamaru shrugged. "There's someone in this room I really want to fight against, but I don't want that person to know too much about this beforehand, or I'll get my ass kicked. So I'll ask you one more time. Surrender."

"Heh." Kin launched a flurry of needles. "Surrender this!"

Shikamaru moved to dodge, but one needle grazed his neck. "GUHU!" he grabbed his neck, feeling for blood. Thankfully, it missed his artery, but the room was going black. "Blinding poison…"

"You know, if you surrender now, I'll let you have the antidote."

"Nah…" Shikamaru cricked his bleeding neck. "I kinda like the darkness. I see better."

"Huh?" Kin laughed at Shikamaru's ridiculous statement, but then the room grew dark, especially the back wall, almost black.

An eye opened on the wall.

A twisted, grotesque blue ringed eye like before, only humongous. "That's better." Shikamaru said, walking towards her with his eyes closed. "Last chance."

Kin scowled, then charged at her blinded foe. She was stopped however, when a black arm shot from the cracks in the floor, lifting her up by the neck.

"Let me tell you a story. Once upon a time there was a very stupid boy who nobody liked. He was friends with a very clever but lazy boy. One day the stupid boy met a magical spirit, who taught the stupid boy to be clever, and strong, and the stupid boy who nobody liked trained in secret, harder than anyone ever had before. So the clever and lazy boy went to this spirit one night, when the boy slept, and asked to be taught. The spirit told the boy was told to work hard, in secret like the stupid boy. So he did, tricking everyone into thinking he was stupid and lazy while doing it. Now…" Shikamaru smiled. "Guess which little boy stands before you now?"

"You… Little…" Kin threw more poisoned needles, but more black arms rose from the ground, catching them.

"And guess which little boy I will fight in the next round." But the voice did not come from where her opponent stood. The voice was much closer than that. She looked at the arm grasping her throat, and her eyes widened as she saw a grinning mouth, filled with flawless teeth. "Want a hint?" The mouth asked her, almost sarcastically.

"AAAAHHHHH!!!" The Kunoichi fainted in terror, urine seeping through her trousers and skirt. The arm withdrew, dropping her on the ground as light returned to the room, the eye closing and vanishing. Shikamaru walked over to her and rummaged through her pockets, looking for an antidote to her poisoned needles.

"And the winner is Shikamaru!" Hayate announced.

"There." Shikamaru pulled a bottle from the sound ninjas pouch and splashed some of the liquid onto the wound. His eyesight returned to see his unconscious opponent carried away by medics. "She actually did it huh?"

"Nara. Off the COUGH arena so the next match can be called."

"Yessir."

The next match was Neji against his cousin, Hinata. It was not a nice match to watch. Eventually, Kiba had to dive in so he could protect his teammate from death. Mind you, many of the other students were still in awe over Shikamaru.

"Damn man… since when could you do that?"

"I told you Chouji. I trained in secret."

"I'm sure that goes beyond training…" Ino was suspicious.

"I trained hard. For several years." Shikamaru looked at the screen. "Chouji, you're up!"

Chouji's opponent was a mummified sound nin called Dosu. Chouji fought well, but was eventually overpowered by the sound ninja. He had to go to hospital, but he fought as hard as he could, and lost honourably. That was one thing Shikamaru noticed. It wasn't necessarily the stronger ninja who won each round, it was that some ninja styles beat others, simple as.

"Alright, next is… Ino Yamanaka against Sakura Haruno!"

"_**Woo! Catfight!"**_

'_Shut it, that's my girlfriend going to fight.' _"Good luck."

"You say that like I need it!" Sakura winked at him and walked down the stairs to her old friend, and current enemy.

"_**You can't say that you won't like it though. Kit gets all hot and bothered at the thought of Temari and Haku having it out in a mud pit you know."**_

Sasuke contemplated the image. It was nice. He then put the same image to Sakura and Ino. Even nicer. _'Who wouldn't? But this is different.'_

"Ready?" Hayate asked.

"_**How?"**_

"FIGHT!"

SMASH

Sakura punched Ino straight back into the stands. Shikamaru jumped and grabbed her, absorbing the impact against the wall. "WINNER!" Hayate announced.

'_That's why.'_

"_**Too short, too much clothes, not enough mud?"**_

'_And that's what will happen to me if she catches me thinking about this.'_

"_**Maybe I'll tell Kit that when he wakes up."**_

"Don't you dare..."

"Don't I dare what?" Sakura asked.

"Erm!" _'Crap!'_ "N-nothing! Good job!"

"Hrm…" Sakura didn't buy it.

"Next match is Kiba Inuzaka against COUGH Naruto Uzumaki."

"Hey, Naruto, you're up!" Said Sasuke, hastily changing the subject.

SNORE

"_**I don't think he's awake, I'll go wake him up." **_The Kyuubi left Sasuke, something he was thankful for.

"Naruto Uzimaki! Come on down!"

"Naruto!" Haku shook him. "Wake up!"

"NO….Sleeping…"

"Let me try…" Temari made some seals and but her hand to Naruto's forehead. Brown mist left his body, but after a few seconds she had to stop for breath. "Dammit, just how much did he drink last night?"

"If Naruto Uzumaki does not enter the arena within three seconds he is disqualified!"

"FOR YOOOUUTH!"

Maito Gai grabbed Naruto by the collar and threw him into the concrete below, leaving him sprawled on the floor. Kiba was a bit freaked out, as were most of the people in the room.

"You have no right to treat my pupil like that." Kakashi noted, sounding bored.

"Your student has no right to be so unyouthful."

"My student is so unyouthful today because he was too youthful last night."

"OH! SO Naruto was in that threesome in the forest!" Rock Lee declared brightly.

"**SHADDUP!"** Naruto shouted suddenly, with so much hate and force that it shocked everyone in the room. "Sleep now…"

"Naruto, I'm beginning the match. You might want to COUGH get up."

"Shush. I'll kick your ass if you wake me up…"

"Seems like he can fight." Hayate shrugged, standing between the increasingly angry Kiba and the unconscious Naruto. "BEGIN!"

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**I like samjaz's work on shikamaru here, the naruto fight will be short, like the ino vs sakura in this one, let me know what you think.**


	16. Embarrassing Defeat

**Chapter 16, again the fight work is all samjaz, im still trying to do fight scenes and failing, working on that though, and everyone knows the outcome of the first battle.**

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One Eye of the Demon

Chapter 16

Embarrassing Defeat

The moment the match started, Kiba dashed towards Naruto, who happened to by lying on his back. Asleep.

Kiba went to kick Naruto in the head, who simply rolled towards the approaching foot, tripping the dog ninja. Unfortunately, his speed meant that he was sent flying halfway across the arena. When he landed, Kiba was painfully aware of the fact that everyone was laughing at him.

Kiba staggered to his feet. "Fight me like a Dog, you pathetic excuse for a ninja!"

He glared at Naruto, and the red glow emanating from beneath the headband covering his right eye.

_____________________________________________________________

Everyone other than Konoha Team 7 and the Suna team were surprised by the way Kiba suddenly developed a powerful nosebleed that drove him into the wall headfirst, knocking him out. His partner, Akamaru, pawed his master, whimpering.

Kurenai moved next to Kakashi. "That wasn't a normal Genjutsu," she asked, "Was it?"

Kakashi gave her a warm eye smile. "Naruto has several… tricks… up his sleeve." He turned his attention back to the ring. "He just likes to keep them there."

Sasuke moved closer to the two Jonin, as did Haku and Temari, as Kurenai whispered "Kakashi. That Jutsu was filled with demonic intent, you can't deny that." She looked concerned. "What if the…" She trailed off as she noticed the three Genin behind her.

"It's alright." Haku said with a smile. "Kyube wouldn't do anything dangerous."

"Kyube?" Kurenai asked with confusion. The penny dropped as she twisted to face Kakashi. "You mean that—"

"Kyube's just a big furball!" Haku declared while Kakashi shrugged. "He wouldn't hurt anyone!"

"GRRRR!" Everyone turned to see a beastlike Kiba charge for Naruto, despite the unconscious Kiba by the wall.

"Wait, is that a cloning technique?" Temari asked.

"You should have been paying attention." Sasuke told her. "The Inuzaka family pride themselves on their dog partners."

"Wait, so that's—?" Haku asked, turning to the arena as Akamaru-turned-kiba leapt for Naruto.

"GRR..!!" Naruto growled, and Akamaru turned back to his original form, whimpering.

"Like I said," Haku noted as Naruto was declared the winner, "The furball wouldn't hurt anyone."

Kurenai had no idea how to respond to that, choosing instead to pick up her students dog as Kiba was carried off by medics. Shortly afterwards Jiraiya limped towards the group, his left arm and left leg moving awkwardly. "Would someone please drag Gaki's sorry ass back up here?"

Kakashi whistled. "That looks painful." Before Jiriiya could get into a rant about the younger generation, however, he turned to Haku, "Would you kindly retrieve your boyfriend?"

Haku looked at Temari, who nodded, and both of them leapt to grab Naruto's unconscious body, dragging him back to the balcony. Kurenai, now holding Akamaru, whispered to Kakashi "What the hell is going on?"

"I don't know the details" Kakashi told her, lowering his voice, "But at some point Naruto discovered a telepathic communication link with the Kyuubi."

"He what!?"

"So far, it appears harmless." Kakashi said, trying to calm her down, "In fact, they appear to have a rather friendly relationship, similar to that of an uncle and cub."

"Cub!?" Kurenai could hardly believe her ears.

Kakashi nodded. "Apparently he called Kyuubi Kyube, and Kyube calls him Kit. Mental," He added, shrugging, "I know."

Sakura tapped Sasuke on the shoulder, then whispered into his ear. "What are the odds that Naruto wakes up to find Haku's tongue in his mouth before he suffocates and dies?"

Sasuke turned around to see Temari trying to tell Haku that what she was doing was not CPR, but as he caught Naruto's eye he heard a voice.

"_**Wake up Kit, take the opportunity!"**_

Sasuke broke eye contact, covering his Sharingan. _'What the hell is going on with that!?'_ He wondered, as Naruto spluttered and pushed Haku off him gently.

'_That is one hell of a wake up call'_ Naruto thought to himself, but immediately sobered up when he saw the two names on the computer screen.

Gaara Vs Rock Lee

He rushed to the fence to see Rock Lee getting into a dramatic stance.

"MY NAME IS ROCK LEE!" He declared. "The Handsome Devil of the Konoha Village! I specialise in Taijutsu, Honesty, and Hard Work!"

Gaara looked at him. "Okay… I'm Gaara, The Sand Waterfall of the Suna Village… I recently made a switch to becoming a Taijutsu specialist too…"

"_**You could just crush him if you let me help you know."**_

'_Shut Up!' _Gaara roared internally, getting into a stance.

"Ah, I see you've chosen a style reminiscent of the Drunken Fist!" Rock Lee declared happily. "This promises to be a very good bout!"

"Get on with COUGH it!"

"Right!" Rock Lee charged at Gaara, sending a punch for his face. Gaara did a cross block, however, but was still pushed back by the sheer force of the blow.

"The Hell!?" _'I didn't sense any chakra…'_

"_**He's not using any." **_Shukaku urged. _**"BLOCK LEFT!"**_

Gaara did this, rapidly blocking jabs, kicks, hooks, sweeps, all manner of Taijutsu moves, barely able to keep up. He failed to block one kick to the stomach, however, and was knocked flying. "GAH!"

"Impressive…" Rock Lee said. "When you block, it feels kind of like a sandbag… so I'm guessing you're using your chakra to make the sand in your pants and jacket contract upon impact, making some form of armour!"

"WELL DONE LEE!" Cried Maito Gai. "I'M PROUD!"

"Gai Sensei!"

"Lee!"

"Gai Sensei!"

"Focus on the match Lee!" Tenten shouted.

"Huh?" Rock Lee asked. "Oh! Right! I'm Sorry…"

He trailed off because he saw the sand spilling out of Gaara's clothes, _'Did I just destroy his defences?'_ Rock Lee thought. _'If so, then I've won!'_ Rock Lee charged for Gaara. "FOR YOOUUTH!"

Gaara made no attempt to block, only creating a Ram seal. Sand flew up to block Rock Lee's kick, but he recovered, and kicked with his other foot.

Rock Lee span around Gaara, kicking and punching at high speeds, but to no avail. As long as Gaara held that seal, Rock Lee could not pass through.

"_**If you just accepted my help" **_Shukaku whispered. _**"I could do that while you focused on attacking!"**_

'_I can do that myself!' _Gaara shouted internally, switching to a Tiger seal for a second, causing the sand to lash out at Rock Lee.

"Woah!" Rock Lee jumped back onto a statue, panting for breath. _'What to do… What would Gai Sensei do?'_

"LEE!"

Rock Lee turned to his teacher, who flashed him a smile and a huge thumbs up. "You can do that!"

Rock Lee gasped. "But you said that I could only do that if lots of people are in danger Gai Sensei!"

"It's okay!" Maito Gai said. "I Will Allow It!"

Rock Lee's eyebrows rose in surprise, then he nodded with a smile. Crossing his legs, he took off his orange leg warmers to show some leg weights.

'_Weights?' _Gaara thought as Rock Lee removed them. _ 'He was fighting with Weights?'_

"Seriously?" Temari asked as Rock Lee stood up to drop them over the side. "Fat lot of good those are going to do—"

CRASH!

Two pillars of dust rose into Rock Lee's outstretched hands. Clapping together, he rubbed them into his hand wraps like chalk. As the dust cleared, the two weights had sunk deep into the concrete floor, creating impressive craters.

Gaara's jaw dropped. "Holy shit."

"_**Now would be a good time to accept my offer."**_

'_I told you, I don't need your—' _SMACK! He was kicked under the chin, knocking him into the air. Rock Lee pushed himself up onto his hands and kicked again. "GAH!"

Rock Lee, from his hand stand, Jumped into the air to deliver another terrific kick. _**"Last chance."**_

'_I told you—' _"URGH!" _'No!'_

"_**Look, I'll only take care of defending you, alright?" **_Shukaku almost sounded scared at this point. _**"I forfeit any ability to cause damage, You're gonna be in full control of that!" **_Gaara grunted in pain as he was kicked once more into the air. _**"I Just don't want us to die here!"**_

As Rock Lee Leapt up to grab Gaara from behind, he submitted, screaming "FINE THEN!"

Next thing Gaara knew, he was on the ground, looking at himself being grabbed by Rock Lee for the Lotus. _'Wait, what?'_

"_**Sand Clone." **_Shukaku told Gaara. _**"It an emergency. Like we agreed, I will only defend you. I'll teach you how to use my power to fight later."**_

"_Why should I trust you?"_ Gaara asked, as Rock Lee plummeted into the ground with the clone.

"_**Because Naruto trusts the Kitsune. And he's worse than me."**_

SMASH! Rock Lee rose from the dust, panting for breath. When the dust cleared, however, he saw the hollow shell of the sand clone turn brown and collapse in on itself. "What!?"

"Over here."

Lee turned to receive a punch in the face from Gaara. He immediately countered, but was blocked again by the sand. Lee span around to knee Gaara in the back, only to be blocked. However, he twisted to hook Gaara in the jaw, an attack that connected.

'_What?'_

"_**My bad, didn't think he'd be so fast."**_

Gaara rolled on the floor as Lee approached, only to twist onto his shoulders to deliver a donkey kick to Lee's face. By the time Gaara landed, however, Lee was gone, so Gaara swung his left arm behind him, which Rock Lee ducked, only to be hit by a right knee from the next direction.

Rock Lee rolled with it, twisting to kick Gaara in the face with both feet. Sand rushed up, however, grabbing him by both ankles, trapping him.

"_**Does this count as an attack?" **_Shukaku asked, not wanting to break his new contract.

'_I'll let it slide this time.' _Gaara responded, as Rock Lee pulled himself up to punch Gaara in the face. Gaara dropped low, sweeping through the pillar of sand, breaking into a run as Rock Lee smashed his back into the ground.

"_**Nicely done Lad."**_

'_Nevermind that.' _Gaara thought desperately as he ran. _'How do you do that sand coffin technique?'_

"_**Hand towards the target, fingers open." **_Shukaku explained. _**"Move your arm with the elbow locked to move the coffin, make a fist to squeeze, loosen your elbow to cancel the Jutsu." **_As Gaara registered this, Shukaku added _**"I'll control everything else this time, as I'm assuming you want his face open so he can breathe."**_

'_Thanks.'_ Gaara thought. _'Ready?'_ He asked, as Rock Lee began to catch up.

"_**And waiting, Lad."**_

Gaara span around, stretching his arm. Sand rushed to the Konoha Ninja, who fought fruitlessly against it as he was cocooned in sand.

"I want you to surrender." Gaara said, lifting him up into the air. "If I squeezed my hand now, the sand would compress, crushing you." Rock Lee gazed into his opponents remorseful eyes. "I don't want to have to do that. I've won."

Rock Lee considered his situation, and sighed. "You're right. Sorry Sensei…" He took a deep breath. "I ADMIT DEFEAT!"

"Alright then... Gaara COUGH Wins."

There were cheers as Gaara brought Rock Lee down gently and released him. Walking towards his opponent, Gaara slapped Rock Lee's hand and shook is. "Good match."

"Good match." Rock Lee nodded, smiling. "Let's do it again sometime,"

"YOOSH!" Maito Gai was crying. "What a beautiful display of fine, gentlemen ninja in the flower of their YOUTH!"

Though the winner, Gaara definitely looked the worse for wear. He was covered in bruises, had a black eye, a split lip, and his Jawbone was visible. A few seconds later, however, the bone was covered one again in flesh.

"You okay?" Temari asked Gaara.

"Fine." He added, deciding to keep Shukaku to himself for now. "Who's up next?"

"I am." Said Kankuro.

Haku sneered as she saw the names on the screen. "Hey, I get to fight a transvestite!"

"It's warpaint dammit!"

"Nah, looks like makeup to me."

"That's it!" Kankuro said. "You are going DOWN!"

"Could the participants please continue their COUGH fight in the ring?" Hayate asked. "Thank you."

Both combatants leapt into the ring as the proctor lifted his hand. "BEGIN!"

Kankuro moved first, launching his puppet towards Haku, who blocked with the Guillotine sword.

"Who you rooting for?" Naruto asked Temari, as Haku jumped onto the swords handle.

"My brother, who do you think?" She asked, not concerned in the slightest.

"Yeah, I suppose so…" Naruto said as Haku launched a handful of Senbon needles, which were blocked by Kankuro's puppet. "But who're you betting on?"

"If I was?" Temari asked, "Haku." Noting Naruto's surprise, she elaborated that "Kankuro spent the last few weeks helping Gaara train his Taijutsu, neglecting his own training in the process. Look, Haku's already taken out his puppet." Following Temari's gaze, Naruto saw that the chakra strings had been cut by Haku's needles. Kankuro moved to pull out his back up puppet, but collapsed to his knees, three Senbon in his throat. "See?" Temari sighed. "Looks like I'm up now."

Naruto looked up to see the screen scramble, then decide on two names. Temari and Tenten. "How did you know?"

"Because this is the last match." Temari said, vaulting the fence and falling into the arena.

"What!?" Naruto turned to Sasuke. "What happened? How did Shikamaru do?"

"Okay." Sasuke lied. "He trapped his opponent in a shadow jutsu, made her copy him throwing a kunai, then he dodged at the last second by leaning back, which she copied, but—"

"She was a couple of inches from the wall so she got knocked out..." Naruto finished, turning to the match at hand. "Yep, sounds like him."

'_He has no idea…'_ Sasuke thought to himself, showing the evil grin he'd been hiding.

Down below, Tenten opened a scroll and drew some Kama. Temari immediately opened her fan and shouted "WIND RELEASE! WIND BLADE!!", Swinging the glowing fan.

The force knocked Tenten into the wall, knocking her out. She had some minor cuts on her hair and clothes, but nothing serious. She was, however, unable to fight. "Winner is Temari…" Hayate coughed. "Alright, could the winners please gather here in the arena?"

A few seconds later, Temari, Naruto, Haku, Gaara, Sasuke, Sakura, Shino, Neji, Shikamaru, and the sound ninja Dosu were gathered in a line.

"Alright." Hayate announced. "So now there are ten of you." He looked at them all in turn, cleared his throats and continued, "Ninjas are trained in teams of three. This is to promote teamwork, and to maximise the chances of you surviving until you become Jonin, but there's another reason." Hayate coughed again. "Those of you that were paying attention should have noticed that it wasn't necessarily the strongest ninja who won each round. Any time a ninja got an advantage over his opponent and grasped it; that was often the ninja who won. In fact, many ninja did not advance today simply through the poor luck of having to fight an opponent that they were not suited to fight against." He looked at Shino, and at Gaara. "So, congratulations. You lucky ten advance to round three of the Chunnin exams, which will be held in one month's time."

Everyone stood a little straighter. _'A month?'_

"This is to give you time to prepare. Instead of random selection from some computer, we're gonna choose the match ups for round three the COUGH old fashioned COUGH way." Seeing confused faces, he explained. "You're gonna draw numbers out of a box."

A Chuunin came to Hayate with said box. "Ladies first. Miss Temari?"

Temari reached forward and put her hand in the box. Pulling a scrap of paper out, she opened it.

* * *

**The finals will be fun, some fun before that in the next chapter, and a great hero appears**


	17. Legend and training

**Two cameo characters in this.**

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

One Eye of the Demon

Chapter 17

The Entrance of a Legend – One Months Training Begins.

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Once the tourney for the finals had been decided, Jiraiya dragged Naruto straight to the Hokage's office, where he was now.

Jiraiya was sat on the window ledge off to the side; Naruto could hear Kyube growling in the back of his head.

The third Hokage sighed and looked down at his desk, his arms resting on it, "Naruto, do you remember when you asked me about your parents, back when you were a child?"

Kyuubi growled louder.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Later, Naruto stood atop the fourth's head on the Hokage monument, slightly leaning into the wind.

'_You knew, didn't you?'_

There was a pause, _**'I suspected... I didn't want to get your hopes up in case I was wrong.'**_

Naruto was silent, his blue eye watching the afternoon activities of Konoha.

A girly scream of pain alerted Naruto to Jiraiya's location.

'_Can I do it? Is it even possible'_

'_**Kit, I will only say this once. It isn't a matter of can or can't. Nor does it matter whether something is possible or not. If someone says that what you're trying to so is impossible, you know what you do?'**_

'_What?'_

'_**YOU TAKE THE IMPOSSIBLE AND SHOVE AND SHOVE IT RIGHT UP THEIR ASS!!'**_ Roared the nine tailed demon, _**'Now take that place your mom left you, take your women there, and then take THEM!! All. Night. Long.'**_

Naruto cut The Kyuubi off with a chuckle, "Baka Ero Kitsune."

A perverted giggle alerted Naruto to the fact that Kakashi was squatting next to him with his orange book. "Kakashi-sensei!"

The book snapped shut. "You alright kid?"

"Yeah, it's just... I got what I always wanted."

"You know who your parents are then?"

Naruto nodded. "I guess I should be angry at dad, but I can't. He did the right thing." Naruto sighed. "Better for one kid to be eternally screwed than for one nation to burn to the ground."

There was a short silence, then Kakashi spoke.

"If you ever got to see him again," He asked, "What would you do?"

Naruto thought for a moment, then stood to facing the setting sun.

"I'd call the old man out," Naruto answered, "Then smash his face in."

Kakashi chuckled, then stood up behind him.

"I'll admit it, at first I saw you as a demon." Kakashi confessed. "But at some point, I realised what you are…" Naruto turned around to face his teacher. "A hero." Kakashi told him. "One who carries a great burden as it is, yet never falters." Kakashi shook his head. "On top of that, you refuse to share the other burdens thrust upon you, and even make other peoples burdens lighter. In short," Kakashi concluded, shaking his head, "You're an idiot."

Naruto closed his eye, shaking his head. "On my eighth birthday, it was you who saved me, wasn't it?"

Kakashi gave an eye-smile, "Idiots like us should look out for each other."

Naruto smiled as well, "Thank you."

The two were silent once more as the sun set, setting Konoha aflame.

"Dad left me with something to do."

Kakashi smiled beneath the mask, "That old dream? Jiraiya, Your old man, even I've tried and failed that one, and so have greater men." Naruto bowed his head sadly, to which Kakashi told him "You're the best one so far."

"I need help." Naruto confessed.

"No matter what the situation, you always have my help."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Naruto followed the Hokage's instructions to the address. A spacious wooden house in the forest; simple but comfortable. The Hokage had said that he had wanted Naruto close to the tower so he could keep an eye on him, but apparently Naruto was old enough to look after himself now.

Naruto looked at the house. It was nice. Naruto thought back through the places where he had lived in his life. The earliest was the orphanage he spent his first years in. That burnt down before he even started standard schooling, Naruto was the only survivor. Because of that, Naruto and Sasuke were the only Konoha orphans in their age group, since Sasuke was raised by family friends until he was old enough.

Shikamaru convinced his parents to let Naruto stay with them next. They were wary at first, but Sarutobi supported it, saying that it was imperative that Naruto grew up with friends. Yoshino was against it at first, but Shikaku, Shikamaru's father, saw the sense in it and allowed Naruto to stay. Though they never loved him like their son, they grew to realise that he was human, and didn't deserve what he was put through.

After meeting Kyuubi, Naruto moved out of the Nara household to his apartment. Shikamaru joked that it was to get away from his mom, but that was when they both began training in secret.

And now, Naruto returned to the house where his mother carried him when she was pregnant. With a faint smile, Naruto carried on walking to the house. He'd get his things from the apartment later, when he went back for Haku.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Awww hell no."

Naruto stared at the people sat in the living room of his new house, on a small plot of land in the Konoha forest. "What the HELL is going on!?" He shouted.

Haku grinned, "Well I was obviously moving with you, which meant Temari did as well, which meant Gaara and Kankaro came along because…" Haku trailed off, "You know…"

Naruto looked at everyone's shrugs, then facepalmed, shaking his head, "I need to lie down…" Haku and Temari followed him to his room.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

SLAM!

"Guess he isn't in the mood tonight either, huh?" Haku asked.

"Well, aged or not," Temari reasoned, "I guess he is still twelve after all."

"Yeah," Haku put her hands behind her head. "Yeah, I guess you're right. In fact, two at once would probably be too much for him at first."

"You're not wrong there…" Temari replied, walking back along the corridor.

"Where you going?" Haku asked.

"I'm claiming one of the other bedrooms before the rest of them get here."

"Rest of them?" Haku asked.

"What, you think it'll be long before Sasuke and Sakura turn up knocking on the door?" Temari laughed. "Knowing Naruto's luck, I give it three days before this place is packed, tops."

"Alright," Haku smiled. "I'll take a room too."

They looked around for a while, then Temari found a room to her liking. Haku chose the one alongside it.

"Hey," Haku asked Temari, before getting to bed, "If two at once is gonna be too much for him..?"

Temari blushed. "Err… Well… We'll cross that bridge when we get to it."

Haku giggled.

"What?" Temari asked.

"Naruto says the same thing." Haku replied, "Only his version involves fire."

Temari smiled. "Mine's the original. Night!"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Once alone in his room, Naruto created a small team of clones and set them to get to sleep in various hidden rooms around the house. That way, whenever he got tired, he could just banish one of the clones and instantly get a few hours worth of rest in a second. Once they were ready, he snuck out of the house with a scroll he stole from the Ninja Academy.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Kakashi watched as Naruto sat in the shade of a tree and studied the scroll in front of him.

Kakashi watched as Naruto struggled with the Taijutsu style.

Kakashi watched as Naruto failed again and again to work with the style, never giving up.

Kakashi slid silently away, _'He needs to do this.'_

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jiraiya watched as Naruto struggled, smiling, _'He has the will of fire all right… I just wish he wasn't so good at breaking people's arms whilst asleep.'_

**Flashback**

"Come on Naruto."

Jiraiya looked at the sleeping form on the floor, "I come here to act as your sensei so all four members of Team 7 can be trained as Shinobi, and here you are asleep!"

Jiraiya mumbled before grabbing the back of Naruto's trench coat.

He felt pain.

**End flashback**

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Naruto sighed as he sat beneath the tree reading the basic academy Taijutsu style scroll.

'_**This is pathetic."**_ Kyube told Naruto._** "I might have nothing suited to your natural style, but this is even worse.'**_

Naruto sighed again, _'My glaring weakness is my Taijutsu. Sure, my sword work needs refining, seeing as I pretty much copy Zabuza's style.'_

'_**Well, if you take the right hook from the second Kata, keeping your elbow level, then take a step into it with a left forearm strike, you could get them with your elbow if the hook misses, and you'd have a higher centre of gravity for the follow up leg sweep which results in a faster reaction for the overhand.'**_

Naruto blinked, _'You really know a lot about Taijutsu don't you?'_

'_**You pick it up over the centuries.'**_

Naruto returned to the Taijutsu scroll, listening to the advice Kyube gave him.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sakura was walking through the shopping district. She was doing this under the pretence of doing the shopping for her mom, but she was really looking for Sasuke.

"Congratulations on making it to the finals!" A young man in his twenties told her.

"Good luck!" His girlfriend called to her.

"Thanks!" Sakura waved at them. It was nice to be recognised, even nicer to be acknowledged, but it was nicest when she was with Sasuke…

"SAKURA!"

The pink haired girl turned around to get a full bodied glomp. "H-hey, Haku…"

"It's good to see you!" Haku told her, rubbing her face in Sakura's chest.

"Yeah…" Sakura was still getting used to how friendly Haku was. "W-what are you doing here?" She asked, getting to her feet.

"Me?" Haku replied. "I'm buying some stuff so I can make Naruto dinner!"

"Oh, yeah." Sakura was still getting used to the idea of Naruto's bigamy. There weren't any laws against it, but it still felt… wrong… to her. "Hey, how is that working out with you guys?"

"How's what working out?" Haku replied, tilting her head.

"You know…" Sakura prompted, "The whole… Bigamy thing."

"Oh, that!" Haku smiled proudly. "That was my idea!"

Sakura's jaw dropped. "Ya-what?"

Haku nodded. "Yeah, I like Naruto, Temari likes Naruto, Naruto likes both me and Temari, and I like Temari!" Haku smiled wider. "It's perfect! Although I think Tem's only sees me as a friend…"

Sakura shook her head. "I'm sure it's more like sisters for her."

Haku's eyes lit up. "REALLY!"

Sakura smiled. "Sure." It felt good making others feel good. "Though, I'm still getting used to the idea…" She added. "If Sasuke tried that I'd probably break his neck."

"Each to their own, I suppose." Haku shrugged. "I say the more the merrier."

Sakura flinched and shuddered at the thought. Such things were… wrong…

"Come on," Haku encouraged, "Don't say that the thought of Sasuke and Gaara getting it on together doesn't make you all moist."

Sakura stopped dead.

"Erm, Sakura?" Haku asked, "Your nose is bleeding."

"I-I'm fine." Sakura wiped her face. "Just… took me by surprise is all." She shook her head violently. "So, you, Naruto and Temari moving in together into that tiny apartment?"

"You haven't heard?" Haku asked, puzzled.

"Heard… What..?" Sakura asked uncertainly.

"Naruto got a house!"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Hey, how's the training going?" Sasuke asked Naruto, cooking pasta in the kitchen

"Don't ask." Naruto replied, going to the fridge for a drink. Then logic hit him and he turned back to the Uchiha. "What are you doing here?"

"Me?" Sasuke replied. "I moved in."

"…What..?"

"I need to focus on my training." Sasuke explained. "Too many fangirls, hate mail, sympathetic benefactors back at my place."

'_Sounds nice.'_ Naruto thought. "So, why here?"

"Because no one knows about it who doesn't already know about Kyuubi." Sasuke replied. "Nice place, by the way."

"It was my mom's." Naruto replied, opening his drink. "So, how long you staying for?"

"Hopefully?" Sasuke told him, "For good."

"I'm kicking you out when you get married you know."

Sasuke laughed. "Gives me ages then."

Naruto joined in the laughter. "You wanna drink?" Naruto offered, grabbing another beer from the fridge.

"Sure." Sasuke held his arm up to catch the can as Naruto threw it, but it was intercepted.

"Not after last time." Sakura told him, dropping the unopened can into the bin before walking away.

"Is she moving in too?" Naruto asked unhopefully.

"I hope not." Sasuke replied with a low voice, retrieving the can from the otherwise empty bin liner. "Half the reason I moved here was because of her."

"I thought you loved her?" Naruto asked as Sasuke poured the contents of the can into a cup.

"I do," Sasuke replied, throwing the empty can away, "But it gets too much at times, you know?"

"NARUTO!!"

The blonde was knocked over by a Haku tackle. He did know.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Much alcohol was drunk that night. None could remember what entailed that night, but the results included a large sign on the basement door saying "Manhut, manly men only," A large hole being created in the back garden, several boulders somehow decorating the various gardens, the words _YAY_ being written on various walls in various handwriting, and said hole becoming filled with saltwater. Also, everyone got thoroughly drunk of their heads.

All in all, it could have gone much worse.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Naruto blinked in surprise, "The hell?"

Naruto had a girl snuggled into either side of him, Haku on his right and Temari on his left... and the tendril of sand wrapped around his ankle.

'_Not good'_

How nobody woke up, Naruto would never know.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Naruto stared at the sky; at least he thought the big blue thing was; a person's head appeared in his vision, "You okay?"

"Owwww."

The head disappeared, "He's okay...ish."

"How is it he was able to tell _me_ how to do Taijutsu," Was that… "Yet is that pathetic at it himself?" …Gaara?

"That is the mystery that is Naruto." Sasuke?

"I like Mysteries." Some girl?

"You like everything Haku" Ah, that girl.

'_I hate me'_

'_**I hate you too'**_

'_I hate you'_

'_**Yes, Basking.'**_

'_Kill me'_

'_**But then my life would be so dull and uneventful!'**_

'_Small price to pay.'_

'_**You say that after eight years alone in a cage.'**_

'_Good point.'_

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Naruto left the house early the next day, he wanted to get some ramen alone before having the group meeting with Kakashi.

Actually, considering that the team would instantly track him to Ichiraku's, he decided to release the henge that hid his age then, now much taller, donned sunglasses and hid his birthmarks. He removed his eye patch and headband for good measure, shoving them in a scroll with his weapons and trademark trenchcoat. He added a henge to turn his hair brown for good measure.

"Can I help you sir?" asked the girl behind the counter as Naruto entered the Café.

The disguised Naruto sat down next to another young man and ordered whatever he was having.

"Ramen?" The young man replied, "Not a bad choice."

Naruto smiled. Sweet. He looked at the young man next to him. He didn't carry any clan marks, and was dressed in simple gray clothes. His blue hair covered his gray eyes, and he looked like he hadn't slept in days.

"You alright?" Naruto asked the young man.

"Yeah, fine." The young man smiled at Naruto, suddenly full of life. "You?"

"Great," Naruto replied, "Thanks." He said to the girl, bringing him some ramen. "So, what you doing here?"

"Oh, Just travelling."

"Cool." Naruto slurped his ramen. He was enjoying this. "So, you travel often?" He never got to make small talk with complete strangers. He should Henge more often.

"Yeah, I like meeting people, helping them out."

"Pretty decent of you." Naruto remarked. "You a Ninja?"

"Me?" Replied the young man. "Nah, I get my money through fortune telling."

"Seriously?" Naruto asked for another bowl, offering his freshly emptied one. "Reading the stars, palms, all that?"

"Nah, that's got nothing to do with fortune telling." The man pulled something out of his pocket. "I use Tarot."

Naruto was sceptical. "Oh yeah? How about telling my fortune then?"

"Sure." The man passed Naruto the small deck. "You shuffle, charge the cards with your chakra while doing it."

Naruto took the cards and shuffled them. They had a red tint as he handed them back to the stranger, who shuffled them again. He then dealt the top card.

It had a symbol of a tree, with the letter V at the bottom.

"You are of the Hierophant." The fortune teller said. "You rely on wisdom, but often use that wisdom to make calculated rash decisions. You know how to use people, and often like people, but you don't like people getting too close."

"Kinda, but that could really apply to anyone."

The stranger smiled, then dealt another card. "Fifteen. Devil. You are trapped, and constantly suffer temptation." He dealt another card. "Twelve. Hanged Man. You can't take any action. Powerless over your own fate, you think, and you now see the world differently than you did before." He dealt a fourth card. "Strength. Since you cannot help yourself, you devote your time helping others. That is your present." The fortune teller dealt a fifth card. "Fourteen. Temperance. Soon you will be free."

Naruto sighed. "Well, I'm sorry to tell you, but you got that completely wrong. Well, not completely off, but since it's so vague, It could still go for anyone." Naruto put some money on the counter. "I'll see you around I guess."

"Hold on." The young man asked Naruto. "Don't you want to know _Your_ fortune?"

Naruto stopped, then turned around. "That _was_ my fortune, wasn't it?"

The young man didn't smile. "Depends. Was that your chakra?"

'_**Okay, I think he might be real.'**_

'_He got you down pretty well there.'_ "Alright" Naruto replied, returning to his seat. The five card were returned to the deck and Naruto shuffled again. This time, the cards had a slight green tint.

The fortune teller shuffled again, then dealt a card. "Seventeen. Star. You are a leader of men, a symbol of hope in darkness."

"Heh." Naruto laughed. "I wish."

The stranger dealt again. "Two. Priestess. You listen well to your inner voice."

'_**You do listen to me a lot.'**_

'_Yeah, I guess.'_ "So what else?"

"Well, next three cards are your future." The man said. He dealt the next three cards in quick succession.

Death. Lovers. Emperor.

"You will lose you innocence, and be exposed to the cruel reality of the world." The man said. "Don't worry, Death Arcana refers to spiritual death."

"Thanks. Guess Lover's doesn't mean I'm gonna get a girlfriend either?"

"Nope." The fortune teller replied. "Lovers refers to choice. Emperor represents power, authority, fatherhood. Interpret this as you wish." He finished, locking his fingers together over his dinner.

"Thanks…" Naruto replied, "I will."

The man smiled, then collected his cards. "It was nice meeting you." He offered his hand. "I'm Kenji. Kenji Fakename

Naruto smiled and took the hand. "Awesome. Awesome McLovin'"

The young man smiled. "I hope we meet again. Until then, Farewell."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Kakashi finally arrived at the Meeting place of team 7, throwing a kunai to the back of Naruto's head. Blood flew.

"Oh, I'm not falling for that again." Kakashi announced, watching Naruto fall to the ground with a Kunai embedded into his skull.

Naruto hit the ground.

"It's good, but you aren't tricking my again."

Blood seeped from the wound.

"Come on Naruto, cut it out."

Bleed.

"Naruto?"

Bleed.

"DAMMIT!!" Kakashi ran straight for his student, "SAKURA! CALL A MEDIC, NOW!" He got to work removing the Kunai. "He's a Jinkurichi, so he might just make it!" Kakashi tugged the Kunai out of his fallen student's skull.

The student exploded into smoke.

"Say what you want," Naruto told his teacher, "But dammit, I am good!"

Kakashi rose to his feet, taking deep breaths. One eye glared at Naruto, _One Day_, the glare told the blonde, _One day soon, I will get you._

Naruto grinned, "You're too old Sensei."

Kakashi's visible eye narrowed even further, which translated it to _How's the Taijutsu coming along?_

Naruto's one smiling eye turned into a glare, one that said _Not as good as your mysterious ability to stop me from killing you. _Kakashi visibly shuddered.

Sasuke went wide-eyed, "Impossible." His single word was a whisper.

"**KAKASHI!!!**"

The Jonin turned around to see what ninja could hide their chakra so well, getting a flying kick to the face.

"THAT was for allowing Maito Gai to do to my SON!" The man stood up, getting off Kakashi's face. While he wasn't much bigger than the gray haired Jonin, His muscles looked like they are carved in granite under his skin. Inch deep abs were visible on his naked torso, he was only wearing simple black trousers and black slippers. He brushed himself off. "Dynamic Entry my ass…" He turned his black eyes to the kids, his thick eyebrows furrowing under his thick, scruffy black hair. "Which one of you is Naruto Uzimaki?"

"He is." All three of his teammates betrayed the blonde in an instant.

"Hey, what!?" Naruto was helpless as the man grabbed him by the wrist with immense strength and carried him away. "NOOO!! "Wait a minute…" Naruto thought for a moment about the chaos that had been ruining his life for the past few days before shouting "YES!! THANK YOU, STRANGE PERSON!"

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**Cookie to whoever can guess the two cameo characters.**


	18. water

**Sorry this took so long, i have massive writers block, samjaz has done most of the work whilst i recover from lack of sleep and playing elder scrolls 4 oblivion.**

_Hey everybody, I'm SamJaz._

_Now, I'm the Beta for this story, and I'm responsible for keeping everyone realistic. Before you stone me, I'll also point out that I'm the guy who made Sasuke a decent guy, made Shikamaru awesome, Kyuubi hilarious, stopped Naruto from being emo and too overpowered, and I'm partly responsible for the major storyline that's about to start._

_Oh, that's right. This is the chapter where things __**really**__ begin to deviate. Or at least, foreshadow the serious deviation. Now, RWC will probably censor most of this, but I trust him to just replace words he doesn't want me to tell you with a simple _**[CENSORED]**_ instead of a block delete, which will probably make this big pile of spoilers really hilarious. So, here goes._

_Basically, _**[CENSORED]**_ is going to _**[CENSORED][CENSORED]**_, which _**[CENSORED]**_ is not going to _**[CENSORED]**_. So, _**[CENSORED]**_ is going to _**[CENSORED][CENSORED]**_, but then it turns out that _**[CENSORED]**_ is really the _**[CENSORED]**_ of the _**[CENSORED]**_, so he goes on a _**[CENSORED]**_. Afterwards, _**[CENSORED]**_ is going to _**[CENSORED]**_, but since _**[CENSORED]**_ didn't _**[CENSORED]**_ to _**[CENSORED]**_ with _**[CENSORED]**_, they need a new _**[CENSORED]**_ to be the _**[CENSORED]**_. They end up _**[CENSORED][CENSORED]**_. Now, _**[CENSORED]**_ doesn't _**[CENSORED]**_ that, and he tells _**[CENSORED]**_ why. _**[CENSORED]**_ then decides to _**[CENSORED][CENSORED]**_, but _**[CENSORED]**_ gets in the way, so _**[CENSORED]**_ has to _**[CENSORED][CENSORED]**_ with _**[CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED][CENSORED]**_, and starts _**[CENSORED] [CENSORED] [CENSORED]**_, his first step to _**[CENSORED] [CENSORED]**_._

_There, I hope that laid out the basic plot for the next few chapters of One Eye Of The _**[CENSORED]**_._

**Idiot… You just ruined the story for everyone…**

_Oh, like anyone will ever care. Anyway, this will probably be the last time _**[CENSORED] **_will let me talk here, so I'll _**[CENSORED]**_ you all later._

Chapter 18

Be Water, My Friend.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"So…" Naruto was still being carried by the strange man, "Where are we going?"

Kyuubi hadn't said a word since the man arrived.

"I'm going to train you in Taijutsu." The man told Naruto. "Properly."

"Oh." Naruto was surprised. "You know, you could have just gotten Gai Sensei to do that… I mean, Lee did pretty damn well in the prelims."

The man spat. "Well!? He lost! Those practiced spasms weren't martial arts! Rock has completely forgotten how to fight naturally!"

"Oookay?" Naruto was confused. "So, you a ninja?"

"No." replied the dark eyed powerhouse. "No, I actually spent years making it impossible for me to use Jutsu's."

"What!? Why?"

"I'll tell you later, once I collect your learning partner."

"Oh, okay." Naruto was surprised, and still being carried over the Konoha rooftops fireman style. "So, who's my partner going to be?"

"My son." Answered Bruce Lee.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Now, there are few things in this world that can intimidate Maito Gai. The great copy ninja Hatake Kakashi? A mere rival. The bloody sand waterfall demon of Sunagakure? A rival for his student. A deadly Sennin? A challenge.

However, in front of this man, the Mighty Guy was nothing more than a coward.

"What…" Bruce Lee hissed, "Have you done to my Rock..?"

"I- I have merely fanned the flames of his yo-"

Gai was cut off mid sentence by a tiny movement in the Martial Artist's right hand. "The Martial Arts are not a Youthful Flame." He stepped over the unconscious Jonin to sit on the stump in the training ground. "It is a process, like continuously filling and emptying a cup of water." He pointed at Naruto. "Be like water, whirlpool."

"_**That was the One-Inch Punch."**_ Hissed Kyube. _**"I still have no idea how it works."**_

"GAI SENSEI!!"

"There you are lad."

Rock Lee froze as he saw his father. "D-Dad..?"

Bruce put a hand on his son's shoulder. "What has he done to you..?"

"Gai-sensei turned me into a fine martial artist!" Rock Lee declared.

"He's turned you into a twisted version of himself." Bruce Lee corrected. "Don't worry, I'm going to try and repair the damage before it's too late."

"What damage?" Rock asked. "Dad?"

"Both of you!" Bruce shouted, "Come with me!" He glared. "You clothes are both completely unfit for combat."

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Ten figures sat in shadow, each seated upon a giant statue in the dark cave.

One with ringed eyes, clearly the leader, spoke first. "Have we located all of them?"

A tall figure with hair sweeping in his face answered first. "One is Sabaku No Gaara, from the Suna. He is currently in Konohagakure for the Chunin exams."

One with a three bladed scythe slung over his shoulder answered second. "Two is with Yugito Nii from Kumo, but she's on a mission in the Snow."

One with a mask hiding his face spoke next. "Three is Yagura, the current Mizukage."

The pale faced projection of a man said his piece next. "Four is Roshi. His current location is unknown, but he was last seen passing through the demon country."

A fishlike man spoke next. "Five is Han, who is in the Iwa."

A hunched over one made his report. "Six is in Kiri, inside Ukataka."

A woman answered next. "Seven is Fu, currently in Suna."

A plantlike man spoke next. "Eight is known as Killer Bee. He is the brother of the Kumokage, currently in Iwa."

A dark haired young man sighed. "Nine is Naruto Uzumaki. Currently in Konoha. However, he appears to have made an unusual connection with the nine. At this point, Extraction would be unwise."

The cave was filled with a dread silence, until the first spoke again.

"Explain yourself Itachi."

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Thank you very much." The Hideo told the young man who helped him put up the new sign above his restaurant. "Would you like to come in for a meal? On the house, of course?"

"I'd love to." Smiled the blue haired youth, "But I just ate. Next time!" He shouted, walking backwards into the crowd.

He turned as the manager waved at his back, putting the headphones into his ears, listening to the music.

_Dreamless dorm, Ticking Clock_

'_He hosts the Kyuubi…'_

_I walk away, from the soundless room_

'_Yet he's relatively sane…'_

_Windless nights, moonlight melts_

'_Even Gaara still shows signs of insanity…'_

_My ghostly shadow, to the lukewarm gloom_

'_He really is unique…'_

_Nightly dance, of bleeding swords_

'_Unless he is actually a fool…'_

_Reminds me that, I still live_

The blue haired young man shuffled his other deck of cards as he walked through the crowd, showing no notice to the man escorting two familiar genin through the crowd.

"I still don't get why I have to get changed!" Naruto protested. "I mean, Sure, Rock Lee looks ridiculous, but the trenchcoat is awesome!"

"The trenchcoat will get you killed." Answered Bruce Lee. "A ninja is supposed to be unseen, subtle, but those damn clothes just draw attention to yourself and will get in your way when you fight."

While Naruto couldn't argue with the second point, he could have pointed out that Bruce Lee was getting his fair share of stares for his bare god-like abs. _'Seriously,' _Naruto thought, _'you could lose a finger in those things.'_

"_**Don't argue and do what he says."**_ Hissed Kyube. _**"He is the best in Taijutsu. He could have taken your dad on in an all out brawl, so long as he didn't let the old man stand still for a minute."**_

'_Why a minute?'_ Naruto asked, but the Kyuubi shushed the boy, telling him to shut up and pay attention.

"Sawyer?" Bruce Lee asked as he entered a clothes shop.

"Hi, how can I…" The tailor stopped as he recognised an old friend. "Bruce! Good to see you!"

"Good to see you too." The martial artist shook the tailors hand.

"Still not wearing a shirt I see."

"Considering a vest actually."

"About time." Sawyer shook his head. "My wife won't touch me for a week after looking at your chest."

"Do some sit-ups then." Bruce laughed with his old friend.

"What can I do for you today then?" The tailor asked.

"I need some proper combat fatigues for my son and my other student." Bruce explained. "Thankfully, only one of them chose their current attire."

Sawyer cringed. "I tried to stop your boy," He explained, "But he was dead set on copying his teacher…"

"Yes, well…" Bruce's frown turned to a smile as he dumped a heavy wallet on the table. "Let's try to fix that why don't we?"

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Jiraiya was sat on the hospital roof with Kakashi, who were discussing the current state of affairs.

The Kakashi didn't like it. "Why would _Lee_ seek Naruto out?"

Jiraiya was hesitant. "That's not all. The spies told me that Lee was with a strange young man earlier."

"Is that important?"

Jiraiya nodded. "Even earlier than that, That same young man gave Naruto a Tarot reading."

"Well, that's odd, but-"

"_Twice._"

It's amazing how much affect a single more word of information can have. For one thing, it froze Kakashi solid. Figuratively, not in a giant block of ice.

Jiraiya nodded. "It's true. Things are playing out."

Kakashi thawed. Figuratively. "Huh?"

"Kami has a hand in this." Jiraiya sighed.

Kakashi's eye widened. "Kami?"

"Not that one."

"Oh…" Kakashi's brain caught up with the conversation. "What!?"

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Hey, Naruto!"

Naruto turned to face Temari, running up to him. He was dressed in a dark grey sleeveless jacket with a high collar, and an orange vest underneath it. He also wore dark grey three-quarter shorts, to which his Kunai pouch was strapped to one leg and Despair to the other. Kitsune was slung over one shoulder, and a simple bag over the other. His right eye was now covered in black bandages, and his Konoha Headband now had a darker cloth than before. Temari couldn't put her finger on it, but Naruto looked more mature than before.

When she realised that they were at equal height, she put her finger on it.

"You released the Henge."

"I'm due a growth spurt." Naruto shrugged.

"You're going away to train until the exams aren't you?"

"Don't tell Haku." Naruto begged, "She'll just follow me and I know neither of us would get any training done."

"And what about me?" Temari asked.

Naruto was puzzled. "Temari, A, you're smart, so I knew you'd figure it out, which you did. B, you can go for a month without going insane, like Haku did. C," Naruto tried to look pathetic. "My Taijutsu really, really sucks."

"Fine," Temari rolled her eyes. "I'll cover for you. Though you really should send a Shadow Clone to say goodbye to her."

Naruto hadn't thought of that. "And that's why I love you." POOF!

The Clone Henged into the younger Naruto dressed in his old trenchcoat gear. "Six hour head start?" the clone asked Temari.

"That… should do it?" Temari answered uncertainly. The clone quickly groped her backside before running for it. "Hey!"

"Sorry…" Naruto rubbed the back of his head. "They tend to develop their own… personalities."

"It's fine..." Replied Temari.

"Hey, Naruto!"

"Yeah, I'm coming Rock!" Naruto shouted over his shoulder. Rock was now dressed in a more rugged Karate Gi, white with black trimming. Black wraps were wrapped around his wrist and knuckles, and his hair, no longer smooth and round, was now shorter and scruffy. Naruto turned back to Temari. "I'll be back in a couple of weeks." He told her before kissing her, stealing a quick grope while he was at it.

"Hey!" Temari shouted as Naruto ran for it.

"Something to keep me going!" Naruto grinned as Temari rubbed her backside.

"Honestly…" Temari smiled, walking back to the house.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Um… where are we going dad?"

Bruce Lee, once he was deep in the forest, turned to his son and Naruto. "Son. I support your decision to become a Ninja. I wouldn't have minded if you wanted to become an artist, a chef, a woodsman or an outlaw." That surprised Rock. "However, Whatever you do, I want you to be the best you can be." Bruce Lee sighed. "And because you decided to become a Taijutsu specialist like myself, then I'm the only one who can do it properly."

"So… Why'd you bring me along?" Naruto asked.

"An old friend asked me to." Replied Bruce. "Alright, drop your bags, this is where we'll set up camp."

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"NARUTO!!"

The clone deftly dodged Haku's glomp. "Meet me back at the house at nightfall!" the clone called to her as he carried on running, "I have something to tell everyone!"

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Emptiness the starting point." Bruce Lee told his two students. "In order to taste my cup of water you must first empty your cup." Both of you, drop all your preconceived and fixed ideas about martial arts and be neutral."

"Everything!?" Protested Rock, "But, everything I've learned can't be useless!"

Bruce looked at his son. "Do you know why this cup is useful?" He said. Not waiting for an answer, he finished "Because it is empty."

'_Wow, that's surprisingly deep…'_ Naruto thought. The Kyuubi, however, remained silent.

"Empty your mind," Bruce Lee continued, "And be formless, shapeless — like water. Now you put water in a cup, it becomes the cup; You put water into a bottle it becomes the bottle; You put it in a teapot it becomes the teapot." The elder Lee took a deep breath. "Water can flow or it can crash. Be water. Forget about the Fire of Youth." He gritted his teeth. "You know why fire is youthful? Because it never lasts. One defeat, and it's gone forever. Fire does not know the difference between a catastrophe and an inconvenience. — To realize that it's just an inconvenience, that it is not a catastrophe, but just an unpleasantness, is part of coming into your own, part of waking up."

Bruce began pacing. "Water, however, is different. Water is always moving, always flowing, always maturing." He stopped. "There is no such thing as maturity. There is instead an ever-evolving process of maturing." He began pacing again. "Because when there is a maturity, there is a conclusion and a cessation." He stopped and punched a tree. It smashed. "_That's_ the end. _That's_ when the coffin is closed." He continued pacing. "You might be deteriorating physically in the long process of aging, but your personal process of daily discovery is ongoing. You continue to learn more and more about yourself every day"

He faced his students. "There are three stages in cultivation." He pointed at Naruto. "You are in the first stage."

"Me?" Naruto asked. He thought he'd be further than that.

Bruce nodded. "The first is the primitive stage. It is a stage of original ignorance in which a person knows nothing about the art of combat."

'_What!?'_ Naruto was offended, but Kyube shushed him.

"In a fight," Continued Lee-sensei, "He simply blocks and strikes instinctively without a concern for what is right and wrong. Of course, he may not be so-called scientific, but, nevertheless, being himself, his attacks or defences are fluid."

'_Fair point.'_ Naruto admitted to himself. Bruce then pointed to his son.

"You, however, are in the second stage. The stage of sophistication," He explained, "Or the mechanical stage."

The Younger Lee stared at his father as he explained that "This stage begins when a person starts his training. He is taught the different ways of blocking, striking, kicking, standing, breathing, and thinking." Bruce shrugged. "Unquestionably, he has gained the scientific knowledge of combat, but his original self and sense of freedom are lost, and his action no longer flows by itself." Rock pulled out a notebook and began scribbling. "His mind tends to freeze at different movements," Bruce continued, walking towards his son, "For calculations and analysis, and even worse, he might be called" He snatched the book out of his son's hands. "'Intellectually bound' and maintain himself outside of the actual reality." Bruce glared. "That's what is happening to you, son. That's why you are here."

"Then, what's the third stage?" Asked Rock Lee, his eyes full of a new kind of inspiration.

"The stage of artlessness." Answered Bruce Lee. "It occurs when, after years of serious and hard practice, the student realizes that after all, Taijutsu is nothing special."

"What!?" Shouted Naruto and Rock in unison.

"And instead of trying to impose on his mind," Bruce overrode the two boy's protests, "He adjusts himself to his opponent, like water pressing on an earthen wall." He leaned towards them. "It flows through the slightest crack. There is nothing to try to do but try to be purposeless and formless, like water. All of his classical techniques and standard styles are minimized, if not wiped out, and nothingness prevails." Bruce righted himself, satisfied that he made his point. "He is no longer confined." He finished.

'_This guy…'_ Naruto thought, _'Is exactly what I needed…'_

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Hey, Shikamaru!" Shouted the Naruto Clone.

"Oh, hey," Shikamaru turned to face his friend. "'sup?"

"Just to let you know, I've skipped town to train for the exams." Reported the clone. "Just thought You should work hard to prepare too."

"Hmph." Shikamaru looked Naruto up and down. "So, you're a clone then."

"That's right!" Replied the clone. "Delivering the good news."

"Can you clone?"

"Yeah!" Naruto-clone shouted. "Look!"

POOF! There were two Naruto clones.

"In that case, why don't you get to work on filling those notebooks? You all can still hear the Kyuubi, right?"

"OOH!" The two clones punched their palms. "Good idea." One replied.

"And no, we can't." Replied the other, "But we do remember what he's said."

"Which reminds me…" the first clone said, "Do you know anything about _'Mankind cannot gain anything without first offering something of similar value'_?"

Shikamaru's eyebrow rose. "Don't you mean equal value?"

"Huh?"

"You quoted it wrong." Shikamaru shook his head. "It's really _'Humankind cannot gain anything without first giving something in return. To obtain, something of equal value must be lost.'_" Turned to leave. "That's the Rikudo Sennin's first law of equivalent exchange. You might want to write that down too."

The Naruto clones looked at each other, before creating four more clones and running straight for the study.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Rock had difficulty reverting to his natural fighting style, having forgotten it over the years he had been training with Maito Gai, but Naruto was doing a good job bringing it out. "Forget about winning and losing;" Bruce told them, correcting Naruto's punch mid throw,

"Forget about pride and pain." Rock Lee threw a punch that Naruto blocked. "Let your opponent graze your skin and you smash into his flesh;" It was a feint, and Naruto got a full fist in the jaw.

"Let him smash into your flesh and you fracture his bones;" Naruto smiled before spinning a kick into his sparring partner.

"Let him fracture your bones," Bruce Lee told his students as his son fell to the ground, "And you take his life."

"Do not be concerned with escaping safely Rock." He added, helping his son up to his feet. "Lay your life before him. Remember, the man who is really serious, with the urge to find out what truth is, has no style at all. He lives only in what is"

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Hey, slave driver!"

"What!?"

"I'm getting cramp!" One of the clones protested, "I think I'm running out of Chakra!"

"You know I don't have enough to make more of us." Replied the overseeing clone while the other dozen scribbled away in their notebooks. "And I still have to deliver the message before any of us can be dismissed."

"Actually, I think we're about done." One clone pointed out, closing his book. "We've all finished what we are told to write about except for him now."

"See?" The original asked the one with cramp, "You're just pathetic!"

"Fine! Be like that!" The clone dismissed himself.

"DAMMIT!!"

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"DAMMIT!!" Naruto shouted.

"What is it?" Asked Rock.

"Damn clone didn't deliver his message…" Naruto growled as the memories flooded in. "Wait… Nevermind, it's fine." Naruto got back to his meal. "The clone cloned himself a few time to get some work done. Gah!" He dropped his chopsticks on the floor.

"You okay?" Bruce asked the blonde.

"Yeah…" Naruto nursed his wrist. "Writers cramp…"

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Alright everyone!" Naruto declared once everyone had gathered in the living room, "The reason I've gathered you all here is so I can tell you how much you all suck!"

…

"That's right!" Continued the clone. "So I'm leaving to train by my lonesome for a month. I won't have to see you losers again until after the exams!"

"I'm coming too!" Haku declared.

"Sorry, but you're too late!" Naruto shouted, smiling at the oncoming sand spike. "I left around noon!"

"WHAT!?"

Smiling, the clone shouted "NOW!" And dismissed himself, as did the other clones.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"NNNNGH!!" Naruto fell to his knees clutching his head.

"What now Naruto-kun?" Rock Lee asked. "Your clone come back?"

"…Thirteen of them…" Naruto grunted, "Seven hours of… studying… each dammit…"

"We'll call it a day for now then." Bruce decided. "If you don't want to sleep on the floor, set up a hammock."

"Is it really that bad?" Rock Lee asked Naruto as his dad walked into the shrubbery.

"Ninety-one hours…" Naruto grunted, "All at once… It kills."

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Hiruzen Sarutobi stood upon his own carved head upon the Hokage monument, looking over the village he had sworn to protect.

"Father!" His son appeared behind him. "What are you doing here?"

Hiruzen turned to face Konohamaru's father. "I fear that the fourth Shinobi war is upon us."

The Jonin stared in amazement. "Wh-what do you mean?"

The Hokage sighed. "The seeds of war have been sown, and harvest is fast approaching." He put a hand on his son's shoulder. "I fear that I will not live to defend my family." He told his son. "In fact, It will be Konohamaru's generation that will have to deal with this great change."

"Change?"

Sarutobi just smiled. "The will of fire runs strong yet."

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Kit, we need to talk."

Naruto was inside the Kyuubi's seal again. Now Kyube looked a lot like himself, only with blood red hair and two demonic eyes. His fangs and whiskers were also more pronounced, and he was dressed in a black and orange jumpsuit.

"Why haven't you been talking to me all day then?" Naruto asked.

Kyube shook his head. "Something's happening, alright? First, there was the guy with Tarot, then Bruce Lee comes out of nowhere to train you?"

"You think they're related?" Asked Naruto.

"Kami is on the move." Kyube warned Naruto. "That's all I'm telling you on this subject.

"What!?" Naruto asked, but the room filled with light and it was morning again.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

_Yeah, Story starts for reals here._

**Oh the fun starts here too.**_  
_


	19. The awaited finals

**Welcome to chapter 19, hope you enjoy, two new cameos here**

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

The One Eye Of The Demon

Chapter 19

The Awaited Finals

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

The next four weeks, the finalists trained. Hard.

Sasuke sparred with Gaara in frequently in between Jutsu and Sharingan training with Kakashi. In return, Sasuke helped Gaara gain control over the Ichibu. Slowly but surely, Gaara was gaining control over the powers of his sand, and Sasuke was learning to read the environment as opposed to just his foe.

Temari explained to Jiraiya were Naruto was and what he was doing, so he decided to take some of the weight off Kakashi by volunteering to train Temari and Haku. After observing them do a closely matched sparring battle, he decided that what they currently needed was Chakra exercises. They got to work learning how to conserve their chakra for much longer, and also how to amplify the strength of a Jutsu by many times his strength. Jiraiya made a mental note to teach Naruto that when he got back, then the Gaki might finally be able to some basic Jutsu.

Neji trained with his uncle in the Hyuuga household. Neither of them visited Hinata, who was kept company by her teammates, especially Kiba, who rarely left her side the whole time.

However, with Rock Lee in the forest and Tenten not competing, Maito Gai had little to do other than look for his dignity. He found it in Sakura, who approached him, almost out of pity, for additional training, since Kakashi had decided to focus on one student at a time, having a rota in place: Sakura in the morning and Sasuke in the afternoon. Maito Gai jumped at the opportunity to train a finalist, and got her working with Tenten every afternoon immediately.

Shikamaru went about his daily business as usual. He visited Chouji in the hospital, and played strategy games with his teacher, Asuma.

Dosu trained alone, working on the exercises his master had given him to learn.

Kankuro, no longer a finalist, explored the town. He was surprised to find how few puppeteers there were in the land of fire, but was surprised that they had Jutsu for controlling people. Intrigued, Kankuro went to the academy library to learn more about this.

Shino, between visiting Hinata in the hospital, trained in a very different way. Has father had granted him access to some of the more dangerous hives that the clan had, and Shino got to work breeding those abilities and traits into his own swarm. By the end of the month, he would have a completely different hive.

Naruto, however, was making astounding progress in his Taijutsu. Bruce also taught him how to use his weapons effectively in combat too, while Rock Lee was resting.

In fact, As well as Jeet Kune Do, Naruto learnt Kenjutsu, Battojutsu, Sayoc Kali, Fencing, and picked up Bartitsu, a martial art from the other side of the world that his teacher had just mastered.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"You're doing well! Both of you!"

Sakura blocked Tenten's blunted sickle with her forearm before countering, which hit lightly.

"YOSH!" Maito Gai shouted, "Let's stop there!"

"Sensei?" Tenten asked. Maito Gai never ended a sparring session on such a weak hit.

"Sakura, you don't have the right body type for Taijutsu." Gai sighed, understanding what the legendary Lee was trying to tell him. "And even if you did, weak blows like that would never work in real combat."

"So, you're just going to give up on me like that!?" Sakura asked, glaring. She had had enough of people writing her off as weak.

"I never said that." Maito Gai replied, pulling out a notebook and writing something on it. "I'm just saying that if you learn Taijutsu my way, you will not become strong."

"Your way?"

Gai tore off the page and handed it to Sakura. "Lee worked so hard, I never noticed that my way of teaching was wrong." He sighed. "It's really no wonder that Neji prefers to train at home... the two I trained my way both lost…"

"Sensei…" Tenten gasped.

He stood up, burning with passion. "YOSH! Tenten! From this point forth, I am going to retrain you properly! No more forcing my way onto you, I shall help you find your own strength, like I should have done!!"

"Sensei?" Tenten was slightly worried.

"And what about me?" Sakura asked.

Maito Gai turned to her. "Just go to that address, tell him I sent you to learn Kaoso Yuudo Ken." Almost as an afterthought, he added "Tell him that I'm calling in that favour."

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Shikamaru placed a counter on the board, then flipped many of the white counters so the black side faced upwards. "Your turn sensei." He said.

Asuma Sarutobi sighed. "What the hell was that in the exam?" He asked his student, putting a white counter down, flipping many black counters to face white.

"A Jutsu I developed." Shikamaru placed another black counter, then turned many of the Othello pieces to face the black side. "A variation of the clan's shadow techniques."

"No shadow technique I've ever seen had mouths or eyes."

"Yeah, it's a bothersome side affect." Shikamaru sighed. "Your move."

Asuma placed a counter down, flipping some black pieces. "Either way, shouldn't you be training for the tournament?"

Shikamaru yawned before placing another piece, winning quarter of the board. "I am, but it works best at night."

Asuma sighed. "Alright, as long as you know what you're doing." He placed another counter, scoring a third of the board. "So, did the Kyuubi teach you how to do it?"

Shikamaru didn't even bother lying to his teacher. "He gave me a little push, why?"

"No reason…" Asuma grabbed his forehead.

"Yeah there is." Shikamaru argued. "You're not smoking."

Asuma stared, then laughed. "Yeah, you're right." He pulled white stick out of his pocket and lit up. "So, you think the demon fox is a threat?"

"Depends." Shikamaru put another piece down. "On who's asking."

"The town council." Asuma answered bluntly.

"Then as long as they don't try anything stupid, they're gonna be fine."

Asuma chuckled again. "Yeah, I suppose you're right."

"You're going to use my argument whenever this comes up aren't you?"

Asuma smiled. "You know how lazy I am."

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Alright, Sasuke, give it a try."

Sasuke nodded to Kakashi, then performed the hand seals for the Chidori.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Sakura knocked on the door of the house on the address Maito Gai had given her. It opened, revealing the person inside.

"Proctor Ibiki!?" Sakura asked in disbelief.

"Sakura Haruno." He replied sternly. "What business you have here?"

"Oh! Erm…" She handed him the piece of paper. "G-Gai Sensei asked me to come here to learn Kaosu Yuudo Ken from you."

Ibiki sighed. "And why should I?"

"He said he was calling in that favour?" Sakura asked uncertainly, unsure if she still wanted to do this.

Ibiki nodded. "Alright. Take a seat."

Sakura did what she was told and sat on the couch as Ibiki boiled a kettle. "He always uses that name for it, but it's called Guided Chaos."

"The Guided Chaos?"

"No, just Guided Chaos." Ibiki corrected, getting three cups from the cupboard. "Maito and I developed it together, but he doesn't use it." He got two herbal teabags. "I took what I learnt from studying the distribution of blood during battles and torture," Sakura grimaced "And from studying the brain's primal defence instincts on a sub-subconscious level." He threw one of the cups at Sakura with no warning.

"AH!" Sakura flinched and covered her head and face with her hands as the cup sailed over her head and smashed on the wall behind the girl.

"Keep that stance!" Ibiki ordered. "That's perfect!"

"..Huh?"

Ibiki smiled evilly. "Guided Chaos takes the body's natural instinct to flinch, then takes it beyond the impossible. Maito helped me turn my research into a martial art, on the condition that I taught it to any one student he sent to me without question". The torture expert poured the boiling water into the two teacups. "And it looks like he's sent me the perfect candidate; a competent genin who still hasn't shaken off her natural cowardice." Ibiki brought the two cups over to the coffee table and sat down as Sakura lowered her flinch to take the offered cup. "Today, we'll go over the theory. The training begins the second you walk out that door."

"What do you mean?" she asked as Ibiki stood up again and started to set up a projector screen.

"You'll find out. First, learning." He smiled evilly as he turned on the projector, and Sakura spilt hot tea over herself in surprise.

"Wh-what the heck!?"

"Feel free to swear, cadet." Ibiki declared in a military-like fashion. "This slide shows the splatter of blood and grey matter of a man who had his head bashed a few months ago." He walked towards the screen with a pointer. "Now, from the splatter," He ringed the stained wall for emphasis, "We can figure out the angle and force of each blow, how the fight went, and how the attacker attempted to defend himself."

"Ah, what!?"

"It was infact the defender who did this to him." Ibiki explained.

"H-how do you know? Who was the defender?"

"We don't know." Ibiki smiled. "But we do know that the defender kicked the attacker's ass three ways 'til Sunday, and how it went down." Ibiki grinned. He had waited so long for this, and now the time had finally come…

He was going to have some fun.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Alright girls." Jiraiya yawned. "Let's call it a day."

"I still don't get this…" Temari complained. "How does sitting around all day meditating increase Chakra?"

"Meditating?" Haku asked, "I thought we were wishing!"

Jiraiya facepalmed. "You weren't supposed to be doing either. You're supposed to force your Chakra through your body at a higher pressure than before to promote accelerated Chakra growth!"

"And how're we supposed to do that!?" Temari asked, "You didn't explain how!?"

Jiraiya groaned. The open baths opened in a few minutes and he didn't want to be late. "Look, I'll help you make up for lost time tonight, alright?"

Haku nodded, then elbowed Temari until she did too.

"Right." Jiraiya shoved his fingers into each girl's right breast.

"Whoa!" Temari shoved him off, "What the HELL do you think you're doing!?"

"Sealing your chakra supply for the night." Jiraiya replied, letting go of Haku, who was giggling.

"That tickled…" She said to herself.

Temari touched her own chest. _'Come to think of it… mine did too…'_

Jiraiya picked up his bag. "The seal was weak, but it'll block your chakra flow for about six hours. It's gonna hurt a bit, and right towards the end it'll feel like you can't breathe, but it'll increase your chakra flow." He began walking away. "Remember the feeling when you get it, that's what you'll be going for tonight!" He disappeared in a cloud of leaves.

"Asshole." Temari bitched. "Come on Haku." She said, "With no chakra, we're gonna have to walk home." _'Good thing we didn't bring our weapons or we wouldn't have been able to carry them…'_

Haku sighed. "I miss Naruto…" she smiled. "Cute little Naruto."

'_Little my ass…'_ Temari thought to herself as she walked with Haku.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

That night, Shikamaru meditated.

We hadn't slept in over a year, not since he stole that mind walking technique from the Yamanaka clan. Instead, he meditated at night, entering his subconscious while his body recuperated from the day's activities.

His mind, meanwhile, visited him.

"So, they begin to learn of our power."

Shikamaru sighed. He was in a dark forest, as he was every night. Sat on a log was a young man with white hair and a maniacal grin; perfect teeth and glowing blue eyes. He was dressed in dark red shirt with smart black trousers.

"They don't know about you though." Shikamaru replied. "Not yet anyways, Morrigan."

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"AAAHH!" Sakura slammed the door to the Uzumaki household behind her in panic, gasping for breath.

"Whoa, what happened to you?" asked Kankuro, looking up from his textbook through his reading glasses.

"I'LL TELL YOU WHAT HAPPENED!!" Sakura screamed

"Not so loud…" Protested Sasuke as he rubbed a cold beer can against his forehead.

"Oh, sorry." Sakura apologised. "Anyway, that asshole Ibiki just sicced half a dozen ANBU on me after showing me a hundred murder scenes!"

"What!?" Gaara exclaimed, "Why?"

"Supposed to be training me on some twisted martial art…" Sakura sighed. She then realised that Sasuke appeared to have a hangover and interrogated him about it.

"Sharingan overload…" Sasuke groaned. "It sucks…"

Kankuro looked over his book. "Isn't an overused Sharingan just supposed to give exhaustion?"

Everyone looked at the puppet master in surprise. "I've been studying jutsu." He explained, showing them his book.

"Well, I dunno." Sasuke shrugged. "Brain not work at this point in… thingy…"

"Time?" Gaara offered.

"That's the… thingy…" Sasuke slumped onto a couch and immediately began snoring.

Loudly.

"If we use a pillow," Gaara offered, "It looks like an accident."

"NO!" Sakura shouted, grabbing her unconscious boyfriend.

"Just like a stroke!" Gaara persuaded.

"NO!" Sakura picked him up in her arms. "I'm taking him to bed!"

"Use a condom." Kunkuro reminded her as he turned back to his book.

She immediately dropped Sasuke, her face completely red. "Ow." Groaned the Uchiha. "Khuugh…"

"Oh, right, you mean taking him to _his_ bed then going to your _own_ bed…" Kankuro shook his head. "Sorry."

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

That night, Haku woke up clutching her chest, panting for breath. The pain was intense, harder than anything she's ever felt before, and it was freezing, FREEZING her from the inside.

The air she was breathing condensed in her throat, and her lungs began filling with water. Her vision was becoming black when suddenly…

It stopped.

More than stopped, she felt better than she ever had before.

…

The old man knew his stuff…

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Weeks passed. Training was completed. And soon…

The third round of the Chunnin exam had arrived…

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Where's Naruto-Kun?" Haku strained to look through the crowd for the familiar head of blond hair.

Kakashi was anxious to see Naruto for an entirely different reason, _'Kami... What did Jiraiya-Sama mean by that? A hand in what? Who... or what is Kami?'_ Although his book was in his hand he wasn't focused on it.

The Genin and Sensei of the Genin 13, as well as the Suna team and their Sensei stood in one of the stands in the arena, missing only Rock Lee and Naruto.

Surprisingly both Baki and Kakashi had the same orange bound book.

"Calm down Haku." Temari put her hand on Haku's shoulder. "You know he'll be here."

Kakashi wasn't the only one lost in thought; Asuma Sarutobi seemed lost in thought, _'Fourth shinobi war, are things that bad?'_

"I miss my Naruto cuddles." Haku's exclamation left many sighing.

"Just do him already and save the rest of us from your whining." Kiba blinked after his statement when he found himself face to face with Temari.

"That's a good idea, thanks Kiba." There was a collection of sighs.

"I'll let Naruto deal with you." Temari turned and walked over to Haku.

"I'm on his list now aren't I?" Kiba looked scared.

Shikamaru gave a nod, "Very top."

"I'll be sure to say how brave you were." Sasuke added his bit.

Kiba blinked, "Were?"

Sasuke gave a Naruto like grin, "I'll be speaking at your funeral."

"Right...what?"

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

The blue haired youth stood atop the wall of Konoha facing towards the great arena where the exam was being held. A red haired man landed next to him on his right, looking towards the arena, neither said anything for a time, till the red haired one broke the silence.

"Even if the morrow is barren of promises, nothing shall forestall my return."

A black haired man dressed in an indigo uniform, with a large sword strapped to his back landed on the other side of the young man.

"Everything is going to plan."

The youth nodded turning to the black haired man. "Angeal, take care of the stragglers."

"Yes sir." Angeal leapt from the wall, darting into the forest surrounding Konoha.

"Genesis, make sure the target remains alive." Kenji McFakename considered his order. "Injury is fine... Just keep him alive."

The red haired man nodded, before looking into the sky. "Infinite in mystery is the gift of the goddess;" He said. "We seek it thus and take to the sky..." With that the red haired man leapt from the wall, into Konoha and disappeared into the shadows.

The blue haired youth stayed a little longer, drawing a single card from inside his jacket and looking at it.

Fool. His favourite.

'_Empty... yet full of possibility…'_

The blue haired youth let go of the card, watching it float on the wind, drifting out of sight as he stood upon the wall.

"Today will bring much, methinks."

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"There, I found you."

Naruto turned around to see who spoke. "Kiba?" He asked.

Kiba approached the blonde Genin. "I need to talk with you." He came face to neck with Naruto. "Wow, you've grown this month."

"Started eating right." Naruto backed off. "Can I help you?"

Kiba grunted. "I want you to do me a favour."

Naruto was puzzled. "And why should I do that?"

"Because i don't have my chance to kick Neji's ass myself."

"Neji?" Naruto asked. "What did he do?"

"Other than beat Hinata within an inch of her life!?"

That surprised Naruto. "He what!?"

Kiba sighed. "I know, you slept through the whole thing, but she was asking for you this whole month Naruto." Kiba glared at the ninja who defeated him. "The least you can do is avenge her."

Naruto nodded. "Alright." With that, Naruto walked towards the stands.

Naruto's new height wasn't all that had seemed to change about him. He now wore a full sleeved gray jacket, open to reveal his chest, which was bare except for some black bandages covering his abdomen, similar to the ones that covered his right eye. He now wore longer trousers than before, and his jacket was buckled across his torso and waist: a compromise between him and his Taijutsu master.

As he passed the two Lee's as he went through the entrance of the arena, you could see the symbol of a burning spiral emblazoned on his back in a strong crimson.

A card fluttered by on the breeze. Bruce Lee snatched it out of the air before looking at it. "The Fool Arcana..." He told his son as Naruto strode into the arena. "Very interesting."

"Why's that tou-san?" Rock lee asked, still wearing his combat Gi, though his eyes more determined than before.

Bruce smiled, "That is something that must be learnt, not taught." He patted his son on the back. "Come on, let's go get our seats." He smiled. "I want to meet that teammate of yours."

Rock smiled at his dad, nodding before leading the way. As his son walked down the corridor, Bruce turned is head into the Shadows, nodding before he followed his son.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

_So, yeah, Now that Rock Lee, and Shikamaru have achieved awesome, Sasuke's, Gaara's, and Naruto's road to awesome is well underway, time to start on Sakura and Kankuro. RWC has things planned for this story that he's not sharing with me, so I've got things planned that I'm not sharing with me. _

_Rest assured though, this can only result in awesome. Have I mentioned that this is gonna be awesome?_

I do indeed have things planned for this story, so what do people think of the developing plot? RWC


	20. Begin

**Here it is, chapter 20 of The One Eye of the Demon, something which i concider a milestone, to answer the review by XPgamer, in this he never saw any physical death, just the illusion deaths, he knew the diffrence, that and i imagine seeing someone die is quite a diffrent experience**

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The One Eye of the Demon

Chapter 20

Begin

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Sasuke looked at his opponent. At first, he cursed his poor luck at drawing Shikamaru's number, but after a month's solid hard training, Sasuke was confident that he could win this.

Oh, he didn't think he was stronger from Shikamaru, far from it.

But he had an advantage.

_All know the way to power, but few walk it.  
To rule yourself is to rule your own world  
When you reach the top, keep climbing  
Shut your mouth and open your eyes  
See the world for what it is  
And not what it should be  
Think lightly of yourself  
And deeply of the world  
Anger is brief madness  
Forget your pride  
Forget your pain  
Walk on_

That was one of the first lessons that the nine tailed fox had taught Naruto when he was young. When Sasuke had read that out of Naruto's book, he was no longer amazed by Naruto's attitude and resilience.

Naruto had control over himself. Sasuke didn't.

That was then, alone in Naruto's study.

This is now, facing Shikamaru in the stadium.

Shikamaru had control over himself.

Sasuke did.

"First Round!" Shouted the referee. "Sasuke Uchiha against Shikamaru Nara!" The proctor slashed the air with his hand before jumping back. "BEGIN!"

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Hm?"

"What is it, Kazekage?" Sarutobi asked his counterpart from the sand village.

"I was just wondering..." Replied the Kazekage, "Why isn't my son battling the Uchiha?"

Sarutobi smiled. "Luck of the draw." He said. "The genin all had one month to prepare for their first opponent, who they each knew in advance." The Hokage looked into the stadium. "This is to prevent any anyone winning simply because they were unprepared for their opponent's style, so this method is closer to a simulation of an assassination, or the battles they will face when they are older, famed Jonin."

"I see…" Replied the Kazekage. "But, the battle hasn't started yet…"

"Indeed…" Replied the Hokage. "This may indeed be a battle of wits over Jutsu…"

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Naruto felt a tap on his shoulder. "Huh?" He exclaimed, turning around to find Gaara.

"Long time no see." Gaara noted. "What do you think of the battle so far?"

Naruto thought this was an interesting question, since neither participant had moved a muscle since the match had started, so he answered honestly. "It's intense…" He said. "It's almost like the battle is in their eyes…"

"Almost." Gaara nodded. "I'd say that the battle was lower down though…"

"Huh?" Naruto asked, looking closer at the participants. _'What the hell is he talking about?'_

'_**The shadows Kit.'**_ Kyube pointed out, sounding amazed. _**'Remember what those two are best at.'**_

'_Shikamaru uses Shadow possession…'_ Naruto considered, noticing that the two ninja's Shadow's were overlapping, _'And Sasuke… his Sharingan can mimic Jutsu… oh.'_ "Oh!" Naruto gasped. "Whoa, they're fighting for control!?"

"NARUTO!!" Screamed Haku.

"Huh?" Naruto turned around to get glomped by a very excited Haku.

"**WHOA!!!**" Shouted the crowd in unison. Whatever had just happened, Naruto missed it.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

What had happened, as it happened, was a dark hand rushing for Sasuke's face, only to be sliced by a quickly made Chidori. Sasuke rushed forward, dodging the shadows as he charged for his opponent, who deftly dodged the Uchiha's attack, jumping into the trees.

'_Dammit.'_ Sasuke thought, quickly performing the hand seals for a fireball no Jutsu. He blew just as a black tail shot out of the grove, setting the tree ablaze as he became trapped. He rolled to the side as Shikamaru did the same, mimicking the other's movements.

Both immediately and started performing identical Jutsu seals, trapped by their conflicting shadows, desperately copying each other's Jutsu in an attempt to gain control.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Whoa!" Temari called. "Look at them go!"

"I know!" Haku replied excitedly. "It's just like when Kakashi fought Zabuza!"

"Huh?" Naruto turned to her. "I don't remember that…"

"Oh, you got knocked out half way through the fight." Sakura told him. "Most likely you just didn't register the fact that you got knocked out and ignored the time difference."

"What!?" Naruto looked at Sakura with surprise, then became even more surprised when he realised how she said it. "Sakura, when did you become an expert on head injuries?"

She shuddered. "Ibiki's lessons…" She took a deep breath. "It's okay… it's okay… it's all over now…"

"Sakura..?" Naruto asked her with concern.

"She's just a little traumatised…" Temari told Naruto. "It's okay."

Fire erupted in the arena as both Sasuke and Shikamaru launched similar fireball Jutsu's.

Sasuke screamed.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

It wasn't the pain from the flames. Shikamaru's fire was much weaker than the flames he had been engulfed in as a child as he desperately tried to master the Katon techniques.

No, this pain was from his mind. He saw his mother get slaughtered. He saw his father killed.

He screamed as his hands cut down every single member of his clan.

"BROTHER!!"

He saw himself as a child, screaming at himself now.

The world turned, and he saw his young self kneel before his older brother, boasting his new Mangekyo Sharingan.

He saw his brother cry.

For the first time, he saw how much his brother hurt that night.

Why? Why did _he_ hurt when _he_ was the one murdering the clan?

He watched his brother tell him that to gain such power, one must kill their closest friend.

He saw the lie on his brothers face as clear as day.

He didn't need to kill.

He needed to feel the pain of losing a brother.

For the first time, Sasuke felt Itachi's pain.

He screamed as he realised that his brother had lied to him all along.

Itachi never wanted to kill the clan.

It had hurt him more than it ever hurt Sasuke.

Someone forced Itachi to do it. Why else would he leave Sasuke alive?

Sasuke stopped screaming, shaking his head free from the memories as the fire before his eyes dissipated.

The fire within his soul, however, burned through his veins like lightning.

Sasuke saw the darkness charge for him.

He dodged it.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

'_**Holy crap!?'**_ Kyube shouted. _**'He just got hit by the forbidden Yamanaka Mind Rape technique and is still able to move!?'**_

'_What's that?'_ Naruto asked. _'I'm guessing it's something not good?'_

'_**I want to know how Shikamaru got his hands on that!'**_Kyube told Naruto. _**'It can be worse than the Tsukuyomi, since that uses the worst thing the user can think of Kit.'**_ Naruto remembered that Sasuke's brother had that technique. _**'The Mind Rape, however, does what it says on the tin. The victim's mind and soul are assaulted with painful, horrifying visions and memories, and they're broken until they're powerless and numb.' **_Kyube warned Naruto._** 'But not dead, though afterwards they may wish they were. Nothing sexual occurs,'**_ Kyube admitted,_** 'But everything else is there to resemble a rape - violation, helplessness, and the poisoning of what could otherwise be a source of joy.'**_

'_Damn…'_ Naruto thought. _'What sicko would use that kind of thing?'_

'_**Your best friend Shikamaru for one, I would too.'**_ Kyube admitted.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"That…" Sasuke panted, "Was… sick…" His eyes flashed a deep purple. "How… DO YOU LIKE IT!?"

Shikamaru froze as he was caught in the Genjutsu.

He then smiled wryly as Sasuke fell to his knees.

"SASUKE!!" Sakura shouted from the stands as Sasuke's face fell to the ground. Shikamaru walked over to Sasuke's limp body as the proctor came and checked Sasuke.

"Sasuke Uchiha is unconscious and no longer able to fight!" The Proctor declared. "Shikamaru Nara is the Victor!"

There was silence in the crowds. While no-one could deny that either combatant had performed at any level other than beyond their expectations, very few had placed their bets against the last Uchiha.

Shikamaru picked Sasuke's body up and gave him a Piggy-back ride. "I'll take him back to the stands." He offered, to which the proctor nodded.

"Why…" Sasuke whispered, "D-didn't it work… on… you..?"

Shikamaru smiled. "How do you think I taught myself the Nyartholep no Jutsu?" He asked, naming the dark Jutsu he used a month before. "I do that to myself every night."

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Three Oto shinobi were creeping towards Konoha through the dense forest, when they all turned around to face a rustle behind them.

"You guys hear that?" One Oto shinobi asked his two companions. They both shook their heads before crumpling to the floor, blood spurting out from their backs.

Angeal stepped from the trees, his large sword strapped to his back and a shorter, bloodier sword in hand. "Next."

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Sasuke woke in the arena's medical facility, looking at Naruto's ugly mug. "No Sakura?" He asked.

"She wanted to come." Naruto admitted, "But since her match is right after the next one, I came instead."

Sasuke laughed, forcing himself to sit up. "This day just gets worse and worse, doesn't it?"

"What did you see?" Naruto asked bluntly.

Sasuke stopped dead, frowning. "I saw what happened the night my brother killed the clan." He said. "I mean, I only saw an illusion before, but this time felt… real…" Sasuke shook his head. "No. I saw it from Itachi's point of view."

'_**Hm?'**_

"He… hated it…" Sasuke said. "I saw the lies he fed me, getting me to hate him like that…" He tucked his knees into his chest. "And I did… I hated him so much…"

Naruto smiled. "Empathy sucks balls, doesn't it?"

"Too right." Sasuke laughed. "How the hell do you manage it?"

Naruto froze. _/\_ _"Second Match!" __/\_ Blared the intercom. _/\_ _"Shino Aburame against Dosu Kinuta! BEGIN!" __/\_

"Sakura's match'll be soon." Said Naruto, "You wanna go?"

Sasuke got off the bed. "Yeah, hope she does better than me."

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

A tall man stood on the outside walls of the Arena, looking down at the contestants, his long silver hair flowing in the breeze.

"So…" He said to himself, "The puppets are on their strings…"

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Dosu glared at the one who crippled his close ally a month before. "I am gonna kill you for what you did!"

Shino looked calm and did not move. "Zaku's dead!" Dosu continued. "You killed him!"

"It is unlikely for a shinobi to have died from those wounds." Shino said. "Not with the Konoha medical facility staff treating him." Shino pushed his shades up his nose. "As it happens, he appeared to have died from a stroke several days after the battle."

"Tch." Dosu got into a stance. "You ruined him as a ninja! No ribcage, no future!!"

Shino caught on. "You killed him. Euthanasia."

"I'll avenge him." He glared. "Kin too, once I kill you."

"I'm afraid that will not happen." Shino replied. "You cannot use your sound Jutsu with your sound pipes blocked with my insects."

Dosu charged, throwing thin, barbed Kunai. Shino dodged these, barely, as one grazed his cheek.

"That's good…" Dosu smiled as the Kunai embedded themselves on the wall behind his foe. "Just what I needed."

"Hm?" Shino asked as a cloud of insects rose from Dosu.

"All I had to do…" Dosu laughed. "Was listen inside your body, listen to the language your insects spoke… and mimic it."

Shino did nothing as his insects flew around in circles. "I'm not fluent," Dosu continued, "But I know enough to make them ignore me."

"So your sound Jutsu prevents me from using my insects…" Shino noted. "So I assume you believe that you can win this match with Taijutsu alone?"

"Better." Dosu declared. "Because my Lord has granted me the power of the-"

Dosu was silenced by the kunai suddenly imbedded in his chest, then killed by the exploding tag attached.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"That… was a disappointment…" Haku sighed.

"I was expecting something a little more…" Sakura looked for the words, "Impressive?"

"You kidding!?" Gaara exclaimed "That was completely badass!!"

'_**Remember Kit.'**_ Kyube told Naruto,_** 'No matter what Jutsu they have, or advantage they have over you, an exploding knife in the face usually works.'**_

"Third Match!" Shouted the referee. "Sakura Haruno and Haku Momochi, please enter the arena!"

Those two girls felt a hand on their shoulder, and then smiled to see that each hand belonged to Sasuke and Naruto respectively.

"I'm rooting for you."

'_**Also, never monologue.'**_ Kyuubi added. _**'You might was well ask them to kill you mid sentence.'**_

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

A balding man sat on a deep blue couch in the deep blue room with his eyes closed. A disturbing chuckle escaped from his mouth as his gloved hand waved over the cards on the table before him. "Veeery interesting indeed…" He said, chuckling again.

The young woman beside him glanced at the cards on the table, but remained silent.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Sakura?" Haku asked her friend and teammate as they walked to the arena. "I want you to know that I won't hold back in this fight."

"Yeah you will." Sakura replied. "I mean, you're not gonna kill me, right?"

Haku increased her pace. "I can't promise you that I won't."

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Round Three!" Hayate called. "BEGIN!"

Sakura drew a Kunai and charged at Haku, who made no movement other than to completely disappear. "Huh?" Sakura asked, slipping to a stop as she became surrounded by mirrors.

"_This is my Kekkai Genkai." _Haku said, though Sakura could not tell where she was speaking from. _"Ice release, the Demonic Ice Crystal Mirrors."_ Sakura looked up, only to see mirrors covering the space above her too. _"Before, I could only keep this up for a few minutes at best, but now…"_ Haku appeared in the mirror in front of Sakura. _"I don't know how long I can keep this up, but not even Temari can get out of here after an hour of trying."_

Sakura dropped to her knees, losing her grip on her Kunai. _"Give up."_ Haku said from the mirror above her. _"I can attack from any location, but you can't do anything. You can't win."_

Sakura, her head still bowed, gritted her teeth. "No…"

"_Give up." _ Haku pleaded. _"I've won."_

"Attack me." Sakura growled. "Don't you dare pity me!"

Haku sighed. _"Alright then…"_

Three Chakra infused senbon needles flew out of the mirror behind Sakura's head.

Sakura caught them between her fingers without moving anything other than her left hand. _"H-huh!?"_

"I told you…" Sakura snarled as she rose to her feet, her head still facing the ground, "Attack me!"

This time, needles were thrown from the twelve ground mirrors in quick succession.

Sakura caught and threw back each one without looking, though the needles merely bounced harmlessly from the ice.

"I thought I told you to ATTACK ME!!" Sakura shouted.

"FINE!" Haku burst out of a mirror, stabbing forward with her enormous sword.

Sakura dodged out of the blades path, pushing it aside like a large door.

Then Haku saw that Sakura's eyes were closed tight.

Then Sakura's shin caught Haku in the back of the head, sending her tumbling to the edge of the Ice trap.

"Attack me." Sakura repeated, lowering her Konoha headband to cover her eyes. "There, I'll even add a handicap for you, happy?"

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Dayumn!" Naruto exclaimed. "Sakura's _bitching_ Haku!" He turned to Sasuke. "How the hell is she doing that!?"

"She'd been doing some training from hell this past month." Sasuke replied, his Sharingan visible. "Guided Chaos, or something. Whatever it is, it ain't Taijutsu."

'_**She's flinching.' **_ Kyube replied. _**'Her body is responding to the threat before her brain is.'**_

"So that's why she blinded herself…" Sasuke said. "What?" He asked an extremely surprised Naruto.

"Y-you can hear him!?"

"Only when my Sharingan's up." Sasuke admitted. "And even then, he only started when you were passed out during the prelims."

"Damn…" Naruto thought, putting his attention back to the fight at hand.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Gai-sensei!"

Maito Gai sat up from his seat at the familiar voice, and had to stop himself from embracing his student. "Lee!" He noticed Rock's father. "Lee…"

Rock and Bruce moved into the two seats Gai had reserved in the hope that they would return. "It's good to see you again, sensei!" Rock told his teacher.

"R-really?" Gai was moved.

Bruce Lee nodded. "I'll return my son to your training." He told an overjoyed Maito. "If you tell me what's happening down there?"

The Jonin nodded. "Haruno- the one in pink, is using a martial art I helped a friend develop years ago, based on the bodies natural reflex to flinch, then taking it to the extreme. It is unusable for most Ninja," Maito continued, "But it is easy for an amateur to master, and any ambush or undetected attack will undoubtedly fail. I sent Haruno to be taught by the man I helped, since he could teach it better than I could, and I couldn't guarantee that I wouldn't try to force my own principles onto the student during the training..."

"As an instructor," Bruce told the Jonin, "You must never try to overwrite the body's natural reflexes, only to correct them." He smiled. "If you can remember that, then you are a suitable teacher for my son."

"That's great!" Tenten announced.

"You make sure my son stays away from spandex." Bruce told her. "You can follow any path you choose to son." He added, turning to Rock, "Just not that one."

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Haku was panting for breath. Even with Sakura's eyes covered, nothing worked. No angle, no speed, no magnitude of attack were working on Sakura. She just parried, blocked, dodged or countered each attack with minimal effort and movement.

"To hell with it." Haku decided, dropping the Jutsu and raising her sword over her head. "AAAARGH!" She cried, charging forward.

"AAAGH!" Sakura screamed, curling up into a ball, which Haku tripped over.

'_Worth it.'_ Haku thought as she got to her feet and Sakura raised her headband to cover her forehead. _'She can stop any attack except the blatantly obvious ones…'_ She let Sakura stand up again before she said "I'm going to punch you now."

"Eh?" Sakura gasped with surprise as she was knocked out by the straight cross connecting to her jaw.

The irony tasted delicious.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

'_**I want to take that moment and marry it Kit.'**_ Kyube announced with glee. _**'I then want to take it to bed, impregnate it, then start a family of little baby moments just like that one. It was **_**The**_** Classic Moment.'**_

'_Shut up…'_ Sasuke thought to himself. _'That's my girlfriend who just lost there._

'_**I take your hate and bask in it.'**_

'_You already do that.'_ Naruto pointed out.

'_**Not you, talking to the rape victim.'**_

"The what!?" Sasuke shouted out loud.

"You got Mind Raped by Shikamaru." Naruto told him. "The technique is actually called Mind Rape."

Sasuke stood up. "I'm gonna go see her." He said, Sharingan fading to his normal black iris. "And keep the puppy on a leash."

'_**No one controls me, Uchiha.'**_

'_He can't hear you without his Sharingan.'_ Naruto thought desperately.

'_**Tell him that next time you see him kit.'**_

"So… Sasuke actually can hear the Kitsune?" Gaara asked Naruto.

"Looks that way." Replied the blonde.

"Can… he hear Shukaku?"

"That thing got sealed," Naruto replied, "Remember?"

"Yeah… I guess…"

'_**You could just tell him.' **_Shukaku whispered.

'_Or I could not send everyone into mass hysteria.'_

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

The blue haired youth stood in the corridors of the arena, when a green armoured giant of a man faded out of the shadows. "Angeal has engaged the invasion force" The armoured man reported, "And everyone else is in position."

The youth stopped the shuffling of his cards and drew the top one. "Pull back for now John."

The orange glow of the man's visor caught the light as it tilted slightly. "Sir?"

The young man returned the card and began shuffling "We appear to have hit a snag." He drew another one at random. "Plan A is in effect."

Snags weren't problems. Problems were expected, they were trained to deal with and expect problems. Snags were things that they did not think could happen. When that girl punched that other girl in the mouth just then? That was a snag.

"Acknowledged." John replied. He hated snags. Spartans hate snags; ambushes, downed teammates, they make the battlefield feel like home. That's what Spartans are trained for.

Snags cost lives. "I'll relay the message."

John faded back into the shadows as swiftly as he came, just as the blue haired young drew another card.

"So, the future is yet to be decided…"

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Fourth match!" Hayate declared. "Naruto Uzumaki and Neji Hyuuga, please enter the arena!"

'_**Kit... don't lose.'**_

'_I won't'_

'_**Kami has bet on you'**_

'_Kami?'_

'_**Remember when I said that some things run deep?'**_

Naruto caught Kiba's eye in the stands and nodded; both to him and the Kyuubi.

'_**Kami runs deepest, she also hates to lose, particularly strip poker.'**_

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"There has been a snag." John told a bearded man in the bathroom.

"I like snags." Replied the bearded man as he zipped up his pants. "They taste like Jerky."

He put on a wide hat and headed for the door. "Aren't you going to wash your hands?" The Spartan asked the cowboy.

The bearded man smiled. "Chuck Norris does not piss on his hands."

The good Chuck reached for the door handle, but it was opened from the other side by Kakashi. Had he not been an experienced shinobi and therefore capable of avoiding such things, he would have choked on his tongue, and might have died.

Had he not taken the man drinking a few years ago, he might have died anyway.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

_Oh yes. You just read that._

_More cameos and beatdowns in the next chapter. Cookie for whoever can name all the cameos._

_Cake for whoever can guess what the hell Kami is._

_And I really liked writing the fight between Haku and Sakura. What with all her crazy Yandere antics, some of you have forgotten who she is. The person who almost killed Sasuke and Naruto with little effort in the anime. _

_Yes, she is a cold blooded killer as well as a happy-go-lucky love machine. A true Yandere._

**Review please, or Chuck Norris will have to pay you a visit.  
**


	21. Naruto vs Neji

SamJaz here and I wrote this chapter for RWC as a favour for him. Enjoy!

**I've been suffering from depression recently and as such my writing has suffered, so SamJaz wrote this, this entire chapter is dedicated to one fight so enjoy, and to those who are confused by the cameo appearances, i could have put a bunch of OCs but they would have probably lacked a good personality, think of the cameos as a bunch of OCs if it helps, and to ****Thousand Tailed Holy FlashFang, you are not wrong, but that is the translation of Kami, not what or who it is in story.**

**Also for a second time in my story Sasuke never saw his clan get killed in reality, only in a Genjutsu which in this story he knows the difference, he has seen dead people, the event of chapter 3 was his first time seeing some die, just to clear that up for ****monkeysrockdude**

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The one eye of the Demon

Chapter 21

Naruto vs Neji

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Naruto strode into the arena, cloak billowing behind him dramatically. He heard boos from the crowds, but was able to pick out the odd cheer in his name.

Most of the audience, however, was in favour of the Hyuuga. '_This is gonna have to be a good beatdown...' _Naruto thought to himself.

_**'**__**Don't take him lightly kit.'**_ Kyube warned Naruto as Neji entered the arena. _**'If he cuts your Chakra, you're as good as dead.'**_

Naruto frowned. _'I'll be careful.'_

'_**Be more than careful Kit. I don't see any openings in his stance.'**_

Naruto grinned. _'Then I'll make one.'_

The Kyuubi laughed. _**'Said like a true fox kit. Make me proud.'**_

"NEGI HYUUGA AGAINST NARUTO UZUMAKI!" Hayate called out, not adding 'The pride of Konoha's noble family against the scum of the earth!' before he lowered his hand and jumped back, shouting "BEGIN!" followed by a cough.

"Give up." Neji told Naruto as he activated his Byakugan. "I can see everything about you. You only fight to be accepted, desperate for any attention you can get."

Naruto smiled and drew the Kitsune. "Close, but you're way off-" He was cut off by a pain in his sword arm. "Huh?"

Naruto saw Neji's hand touching Naruto's wrist. _'I can't feel it…'_

'_**MOVE KIT!!'**_

Naruto moved back as Neji swung with his other hand, dropping the Kitsune from his limp right hand. "I told you." Neji said as he walked slowly to Naruto. "Your fate has been sealed. This world has been separated between those destined for greatness and those destined to fail."

'_**You don't stand a chance unless you can get the chakra in your arm flowing again kit.'**_ Kyube told Naruto. _**'Keep him talking while I fix it.'**_

"What makes you so sure?" Naruto asked, letting go of his limp wrist.

Neji smiled sadistically. "I can figure it out with my eyes." He said. "Everyone's talent is decided at birth. In fact, you can say that everything is decided at birth."

That honestly pissed Naruto off. "Who the hell gave you the right to decide that!?"

"Please." Neji said. "You think you can become Hokage though hard work?" Neji scowled. "Only the most talented shinobi, the ones destined for greatness stand a chance at getting into office. The only destiny everyone shares is death."

Naruto saw anger in Neji's eyes. "You're angry." Naruto said. "You don't like what you're saying."

"It is an unpleasant truth." Neji admitted. "But a truth nonetheless."

Naruto sighed, thinking as fast as he could.

"_Mankind cannot gain anything without first offering something of equal or greater value_." Naruto quoted. "Even if the price is calloused hands and a broken back, ANYTHING can be gained through hard work and determination!"

'_**Got it Kit, go for it!'**_

Naruto smiled, bringing his hands together. "I was just going to beat you down," He said, "But looks like I'm gonna have to beat those ideals down harder. KAGE BUNSHIN!"

Twenty clones of Naruto appeared around Neji, who laughed. "You think this can stop me?" He said. "I know which one's the real one."

Naruto smiled. "Then come get me!"

Neji scowled and charged into the maw, dodging the clones' blows, striking only at one in the face.

The clones all vanished in an instant as Naruto fell to the ground. "H-how?" Naruto asked, too shocked to dodge.

Neji grinned as he stood over the blonde Jinchuriki. "You were the only one who didn't expect to be hit. I told you, my eye sees everything."

Meanwhile, Naruto's eye saw nothing. _'What's going on? Half of my vision's gone black!'_

'_**He cut the chakra to your demon eye!'**_ The Kyuubi roared, seriously concerned. _**'I'll get to work on it!'**_

Naruto kicked up at Neji, who jumped back, giving Naruto time to roll to his feet. "BRING IT BITCH!" Naruto called out, drawing the Despair and charging at Neji.

The Hyuuga took a deep breath. "Hakke two hands."

"GURK!" Naruto gasped as he was struck in two points at once.

"Four hands."

"GAGH!"

"Eight hands."

"GUA!!"

"Sixteen hands. Thirty-two hands." Neji was laying an absolute pounding on Naruto. "Sixteen hands."

Many of the audience cheered as Naruto collapsed on the floor, beaten and bruised, gasping for air.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"KICK HIS ASS NARUTO!" Haku called out.

"It's no use…" Sasuke said. "Naruto's… down…"

"What!?" Temari called. "Can't the Kyuubi just heal him again?"

"The Kyuubi's…" Sasuke hesitated, "Gone."

The people seated around him fell into silence.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

'_Well, this sucks…' _Naruto thought. _'What now?'_

There was silence in his head. _'…Kyube..?'_

Silence. _'Kyube? Say something!'_

No response. _'HEY! YOU THERE YOU DAMNED FOX!?'_

Silence.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"I have hit 64 points on your body." Neji stated. "You can no longer stand."

Gritting his teeth, Naruto forced himself onto his knees. "Heh, is it painful?" Neji asked. "To kneel before a mightier power? Powerless to do anything about it?"

"You… you really don't like doing that, huh?" Naruto coughed up blood. "Who do you kneel to?" _'Dammit… Pain shouldn't normally last this long…'_ He thought to himself as he forced himself to his feet.

"Give up." Neji ordered. "I have no grudge against you, and you cannot win now that I've sealed your chakra."

"Heh." Naruto's mouth bled. "That why you beat Hinata down so hard?"

"What?" Neji asked.

"She stood up to you." Naruto smiled. "She resisted your pathetic idea of 'destiny', and you beat her down for it."

"That is not why I did it." Neji replied.

"So it was your revenge against the main house then?" Naruto scowled. "What the bloody hell did they do to you!?"

Neji glared. "Fine. I will tell you."

Neji removed his Shinobi headband to reveal a curse seal on his forehead. "This is the caged bird seal." Neji stated. "All a member of the main house has to do is activate it, and I could die."

"Hinata hasn't used it yet then." Naruto pointed out. "Fine then. I won't kill you for being a whiny little bitch."

Neji's hate turned to Naruto. "You have no idea what I feel! What I have been through!"

"You've got a cursed seal." Naruto replied, unclipping the strap on his coat. "So what!?"

Naruto tore through the bandages covering his stomach, revealing the Demonic Seal of Binding. "Mine's bigger."

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"What!?" Kakashi called. "He- he's actually showing that in front of everyone!?"

"YOU KNOW WHAT MY SEAL DOES!?" Naruto roared. "IT MAKES THE ENTIRE VILLAGE WANT TO KILL ME!! MY FIRST MEMORY WAS A NINJA LEANING INTO MY CRADLE WITH A KUNAI!! KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM!?"

"What it he..?" Temari started, and then gasped as realisation hit her.

"HE BURNED! WITH THE FOURTY SEVEN OTHER ORPHANS AND OUR CARERS! ALL DEAD!"

"Oh Kami…" Kankuro gasped.

"Akira… Hikaru… Kaede… Kohaku… Kyou… Michi… Yoshi… Yuuki… Shinobu… Ren…" Naruto glared again. "All of them orphaned by the thing sealed inside of me, AND THEY DIED BECAUSE IN THE EYES OF EVERYONE IN THIS VILLAGE OVER TWENTY, I AM NOT EVEN HUMAN!!"

"N-Naruto…" gasped Sakura.

Haku and Gaara however, watched in silence. They too knew the pain of being less than human. Sasuke, Kankuro and Temari didn't, but they understood Naruto's pain in their own way.

To Sakura, however, this was something completely new.

Naruto laughed. "But thanks for this." Naruto told Neji. "Because you just gave me the chance to show everyone here my own power." He smiled. "The power of Uzumaki without the nine tailed demon fox!!"

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"D-did I just hear that!?" Kiba gasped.

"I-It can't be…" Hinata "N-Naruto-kun…"

They looked from the stance as Naruto raised one arm into the sky. "BOYS!!" He shouted. "COME ON OUT!!"

POOF! "Alright!" Naruto said from behind the two. "Let's do this."

"What the hell!?" Kiba shouted, twisting around to face Naruto. "How the hell are you doing that!?"

Naruto grinned. "Shadow clones and Henges." He said. "Two of my best skills."

Hinata realised that this Naruto was dressed back in his academy uniform, and Kiba noticed that this Naruto was shorter than he was. "HERE!!" Naruto called out.

"Who…" Kiba stuttered, "Who the hell are you..?"

The Naruto clone grinned.

"**MY NAME IS NARUTO UZUMAKI!!"** Shouted a hundred identical voices in unison. **"BELIEVE IT!!"**

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Th-that's how he does it…" Temari gasped. "Henged clones everywhere… and he just switches places with them?"

Sasuke slapped his leg. "I just thought he made one really fast! How much Chakra does that guy have!?"

"I have never once run out of Chakra." Gaara pointed out. "And from his demon alone, he has nine times as much as I do."

"And him?" Haku asked.

"His dad was Hokage." Kankuro told her. "He had insane chakra as it was. As the next generation, Naruto would have a little bit more, which was then amplified by the nine tailed fox. _Then_ he as the fox's chakra."

Sasuke nodded. "Even if his chakra has been sealed, he still has too much of it."

Then the world went black as a hundred Naruto clones jumped from the stands, into the arena below.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Neji looked around in disbelief. He couldn't see far with his Byakugan, but he heard the voices.

Then he saw a foot behind him.

He twisted around to grab the foot, but the clone collapsed to smoke as soon as his hand touched it.

He then saw a fist rush up for his face. He blocked it, and the fist collapsed.

Then ninety-eight clones hit the ground in unison. **"COME ON THEN!!"** They taunted.

Neji snarled. "No matter how many clones you throw, it will not change the outcome."

He saw one Naruto, the only one dressed like he was at the start of the match, holding his right forearm, pointing it to the ground. "Prove it." Taunted the true Naruto.

Neji bit his lip, then charged.

He ducked and dodged through the clones, but they left no opening for him to attack the original. "Fine then." He snarled as the surrounding clones lunged for him. "Eight trigrams heavenly spin!"

He exploded into a spinning orb of chakra, destroying any clones that even dared come close.

He stopped spinning after a few seconds to see three clones charging at him with Rasengan. He advanced, swooped beneath the first clone's arm and grabbed it; redirecting it into the second clone, whose own Rasengan was kicked into the third clone.

All three clones were destroyed, and Neji continued with his bloodbath.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"I don't get it…" Temari asked. "Why is he doing this? What can he possibly gain from making Neji kill all of his clones?"

"Any remaining Chakra a clone has when it dies is dispersed amongst the original and the other clones." Sakura pointed out. "So he could be using them to tire Neji out while he recharges."

"No." Sasuke shook his head. "That's what I'd do. That kind of thing's just not his style."

"How many clones are gone so far?" Haku asked.

"That was the forty-forth just then- no, forty-fifth." Sasuke replied, Sharingan spinning.

"How's the Kyuubi?" Asked Gaara.

"Still no sign of its chakra…" Sasuke sighed. "Whatever Naruto's got up his sleeve, it's not worki-" He stopped midsentence.

"What?" The others asked Sasuke. "What is it?" Repeated Haku.

Sasuke didn't answer, only smiled evilly. "Naruto, you marvellous son of a bitch…"

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

The clones continued to gain in strength and chakra as Neji continued tirelessly to plough through them. The large mass of chakra to his left was the original Naruto surrounded by five other clones for protection.

Still, the clones were no match for his Gentle Fist style.

Neji forced his fist through the seventieth clone.

"Guh…" Naruto grunted, sweating with an agonising look on his face.

"Do you feel their pain?" Neji asked Naruto as he cut down more of the clones. "How does it feel to die a hundred deaths by my hand?"

Naruto smiled through the pain. "Only seventy-three so far. This is an absolute breeze."

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Tell me!" Haku shouted, grabbing Sasuke across the back. "What's Naruto doing?"

Sasuke just smiled. "I'm not spoiling it. Just watch…"

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

POOF! Neji took deep breaths as he killed the hundredth clone. "Now." Neji stated. "You gonna send the last of your pawns to die for you?"

Naruto smiled. "Nope. That was the last one."

POOF! The five clones disappeared, replaced by Kunai in the air which fell to the ground.

Neji could now see the chakra flow in Naruto. It stopped half way down his arm.

The pressure where it had stopped, however, was enormous.

"Hey, Neji." Naruto asked as a trickle of Chakra leaked through the blocked Chakra channel. "What happens if you stand on a hose? It blocks up right?" Naruto glared with glee. "So what happens when you turn the tap a hundred times over?" Neji stepped back unconsciously as Naruto raised his chakra-blocked arm, supported by the healthy one. "Then take your foot off?"

Naruto let go if his arm.

Neji was temporarily blinded.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Wh-what the hell is this chakra!?" One of the ANBU guards in the Hokage booth shouted.

"Hawk!" Sarutobi barked. "Shut up, I'm trying to watch!" He ignored his fellow Kage and focused on the huge mass of chakra down below. _'Naruto's power…' _He thought. _'One hundred times over…'_

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Whoa!" Naruto shouted as Neji's eyes focused, adapting to the light. "This is a little overkill, isn't it?" He asked.

Neji could only see a bright blue silhouette, with blue flames engulfing the figure. He shut down his Byakugan, and saw Naruto surrounded in Chakra.

"Yeah, I got a bit too much here." He admitted. "I mean, I got more than ten times my normal chakra here."

Neji froze. _'Did he say that this is only ten times his normal strength!? He-he has to be bluffing…'_

"Scared you there didn't I?" Naruto laughed. "Well, this doesn't even resemble fair anymore, so I gotta use some of this." He raised his hands, extending the fore and middle finger of each one, then making a + symbol with them.

"Making more clones?" Neji asked. "You truly are a one trick pony aren't you?"

Naruto smiled, and then brought his left arm up his right arm. "_Tajuu._ Kage. Bunshin. Bitch."

The world filled with smoke. Then, it was filled with over a thousand shadow clones.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Sasuke raised both hands in the air. "Naruto Uzumaki, I demand that you give me a high five this instant."

SLAP! Each hand was hit by a separate clone. "Sweet!" Sasuke shouted, folding his arms with a very impressed smug. "Shame it'll never work again."

"Huh?" Haku turned to him. "Whaddya mean?"

"After word gets out about this," replied a Naruto clone, "Who the hell will be stupid enough to block off my chakra, then kill a load of clones so I can supercharge on their high pressure chakra?"

Temari looked around, seeing Shinobi from all five of the major villages, watching in amazement at this genin; this child, showing strength and tactics above that of a high Jonin, _without_ the power of his Bijuu.

It was terrifying.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Neji looked at the stands in disbelief. "Not this again..."

"Hey, I'm just as bored as you." Naruto admitted. "But admit it, I could just order these clones to jump on you right now and you'd get crushed before you can take out the first hundred, and how boring would that be?" He asked. "Beggar off!" He shouted to the clones, "You're not wanted!"

Muttered obscenities were heard from the stands as the clones dispersed themselves.

Naruto regained very little chakra.

"Sorry about that." Naruto replied. "See, all I wanted was to beat you to a bloody pulp, and I can do that by myself." He got into a stance. "Just needed to recharge my chakra since, you know." He smiled at the Hyuuga. "You sealed it along with the fox."

Neji's fist shook at the blonde's arrogance. His Byakugan blazed, and chakra flowed out of his pores, forming a protective barrier.

Naruto strode over to where he had dropped the Despair. "You know, when I first graduated from the academy after failing the graduation exam for the third time, I went to the Shinobi armoury for a weapon." He picked the shortsword up and twirled it in the air. "They gave me this; a shortsword made out of Titanium: the crappiest metal in the world for conducting chakra. In fact," He said, grabbing it backhanded mid spin, "It practically nullifies any chakra it touches. What a crappy weapon, huh?"

Neji glared, getting into a stance. "What're you getting at?"

Naruto got into his own stance. "This shortsword, no, this knife, was deemed a failure. So, it was given to the failure that everyone hated." Naruto glared back. "The failure who just summoned a thousand shadow clones for the shits and giggles."

Neji glared even harder as Naruto continued; "_Separated between those destined for greatness and those destined to fail, _huh?" Naruto quoted. "Don't give me that crap." Naruto spat. "The world is separated between those who know when to quit and those who don't. And guess what Neji!?" Naruto shouted as he dodged Neji's unannounced punch.

"I might be clever little bastard," He told Neji as he shoved a knee into the Hyuuga's belly, "But I'm also very stupid."uhhuhhuh?"

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

A blue haired youth laughed at Naruto's words. "Reminds me of that idiot." He shook his head. "Nah, more like his little brother."

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Neji was starting to lose his cool. They'd been fighting for almost ten minutes straight, and Naruto wasn't even showing any signs of fatigue. What's more, he was _good_ with that knife. Neji was covered in small cuts from near misses, but he couldn't hold out much longer.

STAB!

"RRAARGH!" Neji screamed as Despair was stabbed through his hand into the wall.

"No, it's not like it eats chakra." Naruto told Neji with a smile, "It just doesn't conduct chakra at all. Or the body's natural magnetic fields for that matter." He noted as Neji threw up onto the floor. "Don't bother trying to pull it out." Naruto said. "That sword's deep into the wall, you can't possibly do it." Naruto laughed. "That's what you'd say. I say go nuts!" Naruto walked away from the struggling Hyuuga. "I got something I need to do."

"Wh-what..?" Neji gasped, gulping in the air as he sweated for the pain.

"Hey, uh…" Hayate leaned into the pinned Neji. "Can… you still fight?"

Neji took in a deep breath and nodded, trying to clear his head. "Alright then." Hayate replied, backing off. "Con *COUGH* tinue."

Naruto, meanwhile, had created a clone and had it run into the stands. "Hey, Kiba!" Shouted the clone as he ran to the dog-nin's seat. "Okay, you want him to suffer physically or psychologically?"

"Huh!?" Kiba was still in shock at Naruto's brutality. "What're you asking me for?"

"You're the one who asked me to do this in proxy." Naruto told him. "Which one would you do?" Naruto's clone slapped his head. "What am I saying… you'd beat the living daylights out of him while he couldn't move!" The clone turned back to the arena. "Sorry for bothering y-"

POOF!

"AARRGHH!" Naruto screamed. He looked down to see the Despair poking through his right ribs, then he heard Neji panting for breath behind him. "Whoa…" Naruto replied. "So you do admit that you can fight a higher power then."

"Wh-what!?" Neji flinched as the sword's handle knocked his hand as Naruto turned around to face him.

"After the huge beatdown I just gave you," Naruto continued, "After all the power you know that I have, even as I left you stabbed in a wall so I can discuss how I should torture you." Naruto laughed, then winced as he clutched at the sword stabbed through him. "Ow... but you actually found the balls to stab me with my own weapon…"

Naruto stepped back from Neji as his blood fell to the ground. "It's okay proctor!" Naruto called. "I'm fine."

"You need to see a medic!" Hayate called. "This match is-"

"HWARGH!" Naruto pulled the blade out sideways by the edge. "Don't worry sir!" He replied happily. "'Tis but a flesh wound." Naruto coughed up blood as he flicked the Despair around, catching the bloody handle with his bloody hand. "Great…" He replied, looking down. "You ruined my new jacket…" Naruto sighed and shrugged the jacket off.

There was a horizontal line on his torso where the sword had cut his chest. There was a fair amount of blood, and I was bleeding even more now. "And my favourite skin…" Naruto sighed as he put a hand to the wound. "Ngh!" Naruto grunted as he cauterised the wound. _'Dammit… Hope Kyube can do something about that…'_

_**'**__**I'll see what I can do.'**_

That startled Naruto. _'When did you get back?'_

'_**Just now kit.'**_ Kyube replied. _**'What did I miss?'**_

'_Other than me getting stabbed?"_ Naruto asked as Neji stared, Byakugan run empty. _'Not much.'_ He then raised a hand and taunted Neji further. "How about it?" He asked. "Feel like fighting destiny again?" He smiled. "'Cause you know, once you got a taste for it, you'll never back down again..."

WHAM! Naruto was knocked down by Neji's punch. However, Naruto span into a kick into Neji's face, sending the Hyuuga spinning into the air.

"Damn…" Naruto winced as he forced himself off the floor after landing. _'How's it coming Kyube?"_

'_**Few more minutes Kit.'**_

"Ngh…" Naruto grunted as he forced himself to his feet. _'Do we have that long?'_

"NEJI HYUUGA IS UNCONCIOUS!" Hayate called out between coughing. "NARUTO UZUMAKI IS THE VICTOR!"

'_**Plenty of time Kit.'**_

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

That was a decent fight.

I had Naruto stabbed so I could make him look badass. And because I don't like Naruto in an overcoat, so I'll destroy any he gets. Might even end up a running gag unless we settle on one we both like.

That may have, at over 3500 words, be the longest fight scene I have ever written. Now, the reason the fight took so long was because Neji is a powerful dude. Bear in mind that Naruto had to call on the Kyuubi's chakra to win in the original version, and the main difference in power is that Naruto is constantly half way into his initial jinchuriki form as it is, so even with the heightened skills and training, this is the likely power difference.

The thousand clones was unnecessary, I admit, but I liked the idea of that scene.

Next time: stuff happens. Probably.


	22. The tenth level of hell

**Here we go, chapter 22, hope you like it, and yes if it does exist this is my vision of the tenth level of hell, my imagination scares me.**

**One Eye Of The Demon**

**Chapter 22**

**The Tenth Level Of Hell**

* * *

Up in the Kage box, the Kazekage leaned forward slightly. "I am looking forward to this fight, my friend." He told Sarutobi.

The Third Hokage gave him a knowing smirk.

* * *

_\_ "Now for the final match of the first round!" _\_ Blared the speakers once Naruto and Neji had been looked over and treated by the medic-nins. _\_ "Would Temari Sabaku and Gaara No Sabaku please enter the arena!" _\_

'_Wait, his middle name is actually _the_?'_ Sasuke thought as Naruto gave a good luck kiss to Temari. It was taking a while, and Gaara was already long gone down the corridor.

"I'll be right back." Sasuke told Sakura, "Just need the bathroom."

"I'll get popcorn." Kankuro decided, getting up from his chair and following the Uchiha.

* * *

Kankuro stopped Sasuke just before they turned a corner. _'Naruto and Gaara'_ Kankuro mouthed, while signing for Sasuke to use his Sharingan on the mirror so he could lipread their conversation.

Sasuke looked into the mirror, Sharingan spinning, and began translating for Kankuro.

* * *

"…so if you hurt her in any way…" Naruto threatened Gaara "I will personally send you to the tenth level of hell."

"_**Not even I would do that Kit."**_ Kyube growled. _**"Actually, I probably would, but not to the in-laws."**_

Gaara raised an eyebrow. "I thought there were only nine?"

"_**Well, maybe the mother-in-law if she was particularly hate-worthy."**_ Kyube continued, _**"But Gaara's pretty sound as far as in-laws go."**_

"It's one the Kyuubi no Kitsune made special." Naruto told Gaara with a threatening grin. "It's filled with rabid yaoi fangirls."

Gaara laughed sheepishly. "Well too bad." He sighed sarcastically. "I'm not gay."

"Oh?" Naruto's grin twisted malevolently. "They think otherwise."

"_**Send Kankuro too."**_ Kyube suggested as Gaara began panicking.

'_What did he do?'_ Naruto asked. _'He lost like a good boy.'_

"_**He dresses in drag."**_ Kyube told him. _**"The highest sin."**_

"I'll even send Kankuro as a bum chum." Naruto added with a smile.

"_**Yet, when a woman does it, it's hot…"**_ Kyube pondered as Naruto left Gaara in fear. _**"Do I have double standards?"**_

'_Yes.'_ Naruto replied as he walked away. _'But I agree with you.'_

* * *

"It's war paint!" Kankuro growled as Sasuke shut down his Sharingan.

"Clearly the Kyuubi no Kitsune thinks differently." Sasuke replied, shaking his head. _'He used the Kyuubi's full name to amplify the threat… I thought only mom did that…'_ Sasuke's face immediately fell, thinking about his lost parents.

"Well, whatever." Kankuro leaned against the wall smugly. "Gaara doesn't have any fangirls."

Sasuke snapped out of his mood to look at Kankuro on shock. "What?" The painted puppeteer asked.

"…He's moody," Sasuke listed, counting on his fingers. "Bishie, Has a tragic past, rejects almost all female attention, has killed people, got a demon inside him, rich dad, tattoos, dazzling green eyes and has red hair." Sasuke put his hands down. "I only have half of those and I had to move into the woods to get away from my fangirls."

"Your eyes turn red and evil." Kankuro countered.

"Not the same." Sasuke replied. "If you two actually went there, he'd become a glorified sex doll and you'd be torn apart to build a shrine to sodomy."

"Lovely." Temari sighed as she walked past. "Make sure he wakes up in time for the match." She added as Kankuro fainted. "Come on Gaara, time for me to kick your ass."

* * *

"_**Screw what the fox says." **_Shukaku told Gaara. _**"You have the power to beat her down spectacularly!"**_

'_But… fangirls…'_ Gaara thought back as he walked towards the arena with his sister.

Shukaku sighed. _**"If you're that terrified, then all you have to do is show your skill without hurting her."**_

"Eh?" Gaara asked out loud.

"_**You can win this exam even if you lose the tournament."**_ Shukaku hissed as Temari glanced at her brother. _**"Remember? The judges are looking for talent and potential."**_

"Oh yeah…" Gaara mumbled aloud as they walked into the sunlight. _'Thanks.'_ He thought to Shukaku as he stopped before the proctor.

"_**Just make me look good."**_ The Tanuki ordered as Temari walked into her starting position.

"Gaara No Shukaku against Temari COUGH Shukaku!" Hayate called. "BEGIN!"

"Don't you dare go easy on me." Temari ordered, reaching for her fan. "Huh!?" She gasped, realising that a claw of sand had already taken it. "No way…" She gasped, dropping into a kick aimed at Gaara's jaw as he ran in with a punch. He shoved his extended elbow downward to block the kick, then forced himself into the air with sand.

"Not bad." Temari smirked, biting her thumb. "SCYTHE WEASEL!!" She shouted, shoving her bleeding hand into the ground. Ink sprawled out from her palm and a white weasel with a scythe flew at the falling Gaara, swinging its weapon.

Gaara grinned, raising his arm as a pillar of sand rose from the ground and smashed the rodent's jaw.

However, it was only a diversion while Temari got her fan. Gaara scowled, launching a flurry of sand spikes at his sister. She smashed them with the opening swing of her fan, then launched a gust of wind with her fan, launching the dust and sand back at her brother, her was forced to cover his eyes or become blind.

He lowered his arms and opened his eyes to see his sister charging up a tremendous amount of wind chakra on her fan. Gaara smiled, then raised one hand over the ground, summoning a short, thin pillar of golden sand.

* * *

"No freakin way!" Sasuke shouted, leaping out of his seat.

"That must be the best thing ever." Naruto agreed.

"What's happening?" Haku asked, confused.

"Gaara's manipulating the sand in that sword." Sasuke explained. "All the sharp little grains of sand are spinning around the blade, constantly making tiny, insignificant cuts, but fast enough to cut down a tree in seconds!"

"It's kinda like a saw," Naruto added as Gaara proved Sasuke's claim on an innocent tree, "Only really, really fast and you don't get hand cramp."

"Okay, it's effective." Sakura admitted, "But I don't get why you two are so exited about it."

The sandsaw roared with rage as the two boys squealed in delight.

"Must be a guy thing." Haku shrugged.

"Dude!" Naruto shouted in Sasuke's ear, "Imagine that, only with a spiked chain!"

"Like a spike-chain saw?" Sasuke replied, his eyes gleaming.

"_**Already exists."**_ Kyube sighed. _**"We call it a Chainsaw, and it's powered by explosions."**_

Naruto and Sasuke gave each other a bone breaking high five in order to preserve their sanity.

"_**Didn't you threaten to send him to hell if she got hurt Kit?" **_Kyube asked Naruto, tired of their boyish attitude.

"GO ON GAARA!!" Naruto cheered. "YOU CAN DO THIS!!"

The Kyuubi sighed.

* * *

Neither Temari nor Gaara was able to pick out anyone's voices from the crowd, and both focused on the task at hand; kicking the others ass.

Temari folded up her fan, charging it with wind chakra as she held it across her back like an undrawn claymore. Gaara grunted, then charged with his sandsaw.

Temari jumped back and swung her fan at the blade, smashing it apart with her razor sharp chakra. She then opened her fan and blasted the sand back at her brother with a burst of wind.

Gaara smiled, swinging his arm as the sand reformed as a long, brown serpentine tail that lashed out at his sister. She managed to block it with her fan, but the sand whip bounced off it and struck her from behind. Gritting her teeth, Temari span around with her open fan, launching herself up into the air and breaking the sand against the ground. She launched herself higher and higher with her fan until she managed to grasp the ceiling rafters.

"Dammit…" She gasped as she planted her feet firmly on the underside of the open ceiling. "I thought he couldn't use Shukaku's power anymore…"

"Well, it looks like he can."

Temari looked up to see a blue haired young man, poking his head over the edge of the roof to look at her. "If you want my advice," He said, handing her a card, "Throw a load of chakra charged kunai at the ground around him, make it look like you wanted them to hit him, then launch a full frontal wind blast for him to dodge, but hit the fault lines made by the kunai." Temari looked at the card; it showed a tower being struck by lightning, and the top half of the tower falling off as people fell to their death. "Good luck." He told her as he pulled his head back from her view.

Temari thought about the card before tucking it inside her kimono, drawing four kunai in its place.

The young man drew another card with the chakra he borrowed from touching Temari's hand and looked at it with surprise.

"So… Naruto isn't the Fool in this hand?"

* * *

Gaara looked up at the ceiling, trying to figure out what his sister was up to.

"_**Whatever you do,"**_ Shukaku barked in his mind, _**"Don't move!"**_

"Eh?" Gaara asked as eight bursts of white energy stabbed through the ground around him: each one missed by about half a metre.

"_**NOW MOVE!!"**_

Gaara jumped back obediently as a huge blast of wind energy crushed the space where he was previously standing, making a fairly deep crater.

'_Damn, that could've seriously hurt.'_ Gaara thought as a wall of sand rose above his head to block Temari's overhead strike with her fan. To his surprise, she smiled as Gaara's feet suddenly sunk a couple of inches into the dirt.

Then the ground collapsed.

There wasn't anywhere for the collapsed ground to go to mind you, but it was enough to land him on his backside and her on her feet.

"You know," Temari smiled. "I really thought that that monster was sealed for good." She lifted her fan over her head. "Go to hell."

_I will personally send you to the tenth level of hell._

Gaara froze as he remembered Naruto's threat, and couldn't dodge Temari's knockout blow.

* * *

Sarutobi winced theatrically. "Oooh, that's gotta hurt!"

"…Indeed…" Growled the Kazekage. Sarutobi smiled at the other's rage. His fist was clenched so tight that blood was seeping through his fingers.

The Third Hokage's face returned to a grim mask as Hayate announced the winner. _'I will not fail again.'_

* * *

"GO ON TEMARI!!" Naruto cheered.

_\_ "Would Shikamaru Nara and Shino Aburame please enter the arena!" _\_

Naruto blinked as he realised something. _'I gotta fight Haku next.'_ He thought. _'Then I gotta fight Temari…'_

"_**Surefire way to end up on the couch Kit."**_

_\_ "Shino Aburame has forfeited the match! Shikamaru advances!" _\_

"WHAT!?" Naruto shouted as he created a clone and sent it to where the bug user was standing.

"Why!?" Pleaded the clone. "Why the hell would you forfeit like that?"

Shino made little movement. "I know a lost battle when I see one. As I am now, I couldn't even defeat him a month ago. You are the only one out of us Genin who stands a chance."

"But, you're good!" Naruto shouted. "You could do it!"

"Hmph." Naruto thought he saw a hint of a smile from inside Shino's collar. "I know when I am out of my depth."

The clone shook his head. "Man, I really don't get you…" He said before dispersing himself.

* * *

Naruto received the clones memories. "What!?" He shouted. "That's ridiculous! Shika was decent against Sasuke, but with the amount of chakra he used, Shino could've won!"

"_**BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"**_

'_What's so funny?'_ Naruto asked.

"_**You'll find out when you're older Kit.'**_

Naruto pouted. _'How much older?'_

"_**Couple of minutes."**_

_\_ "Would Naruto Uzumaki and Haku Momochi please enter the arena?" _\_ Called the announcer.

"Kami hates me…" Naruto sighed.

"_**She's just trying to get me back for the time I won her bra."**_

"Come on Naruto!" Haku called as she jumped onto his back. "It'll be fun!" She leaned forward into his ear. "Just don't expect em to go easy on you. I'll make it up to you tonight." She leaned back and clapped her heels on Naruto's thighs. "Now, FORWARD!" She shouted, pointing towards the arena.

'_Why me?'_ Naruto asked himself as he gave Haku a piggy back ride to the Arena.

"_**Because it's funny."**_

* * *

"Round two! Second Match!" Hayate called as Naruto faced Haku in the arena, both ready to draw their swords from their backs. "Begin!"

Haku grabbed the handle of the Guillotine blade, only for the handle to grab her. "Eh?" She asked, as she was thrown to the ground by her arm.

"SUBMIT!" Naruto shouted, kneeling on her back as he forced her arm into a gear box.

"Wh-what!?" Haku gasped, and looked up to see Naruto standing before her with a filthy grin on his face. He grabbed the sword handle from his right shoulder and pulled, drawing Haku's enormous weapon.

"Clone, henge, switch, unhenge, lay awesome." The original Naruto boasted as he pointed the oversized sword at his pinned down girlfriend. "How the hell did you not see this coming?"

"I… Uh… How… Ugh…" Haku groaned. "Dammit… you win…"

Naruto did a little victory dance as the clone dispersed and Hayate announced him as the winner. "Would Temari Sabaku please enter the COUGH arena?" Hayate asked as Naruto helped Haku to her feet.

"I'll get you for that later." Haku pouted as Naruto passed her the sword with a smile. She walked past him and he looked forward with a stern gaze as Temari walked into the arena, popping a soldier pill into her mouth as she walked.

"Naruto Uzumaki Versus Temari Sabaku." Hayate coughed. "BEGIN!"

Temari immediately threw the fan at Naruto, and was mildly surprised when it didn't turn into a clone. "Like I'd do that twice!" Naruto shouted as he charged forward with a Rasengan.

Temari immediately gathered a powerful ball of wind chakra to counter it, and smiled as their powers were matched; the discharge from the two balls of rotating chakra colliding.

Naruto smiled as sweat beaded on Temari's forehead. He was impressed that she could match him on sheer power, if only for a few seconds, but it wasn't enough as he stepped into her space and uppercut her on the chin, knocking her into the air and out of her consciousness.

"Temari Sabaku has been defeated." Announced a bored Hayate. "Naruto COUGH Uzumaki proceeds to the finals."

* * *

Shikamaru smiled from his balcony. Naruto wasn't the little five year old kid who would stay overnight before disappearing for a week anymore. He thought back as he remembered the first night he met him; his clothes burnt and covered in blood, alongside his unscathed skin and hair, his tears being washed away in the orange rain. What would their lives have been like if he hadn't found him that evening his orphanage burnt down?

Shikamaru sighed the thought away. No need to ponder on what Could Have Been. _What IS is more important than WHAT SHOULD BE. Too many people are looking at What Is from a position of thinking What Should Be, or What Could Have Been._ That was one of the first things Morrigan had told him in the past year, and it was something the Kyuubi No Kitsune had taught as well. It was a lesson Shikamaru made a point of never forgetting.

_\_ "There will be a fifteen minute break before the final match!" _\_ The speaker announced. _\_ "Please feel free to purchase some refreshment from our vendors!" _\_

Shikamaru sighed. _'I suppose I could go for some boiled eggs…'_ He thought, walking towards the concessions stand. He used to hate the dish, but it had been growing on him lately.

* * *

Fifteen minutes later, Naruto and Shikamaru were facing each other in the arena. Naruto was begging Hayate for time to finish the bowl of ramen in his hands while wolfing the noodles down his neck, and Shikamaru sighed to himself.

'_He hasn't changed at all has he?'_

"FINAL MATCH!!" Hayate shouted. "Naruto Uzumaki against Shikamaru Nara!"

"Aw, come on!" Naruto begged as Hayate chopped his hand down.

"BEGIN!" He called, jumping back.

"I'll let you finish." Shikamaru sighed.

Naruto beamed. "You're a real gent Shika, you know that?" He immediately resumed eating his meal.

Shikamaru chuckled. "Man, you're a real bother sometimes, you know that?"

Naruto nodded as he chewed.

Shikamaru shook his head. "How long have we waited for this match?" He asked Naruto.

Naruto threw away his empty bowl and got into a Taijutsu stance, chopsticks at the ready. "Too long." Naruto replied with a determined grin.

Shikamaru gave a grin to match the blonde's and got ready to fight.

Then the wall of the stadium exploded.

* * *

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Gasp! Plot! Is this story finally going somewhere?

Next time, RWC might even tell you what the hell Kami is. You might even get to find out who blew up the wall.

Or maybe he'll be a prick and keep us all in suspense.

**Heh heh heh  
**


	23. Ambushing the Ambush of the Ambush

Things have been hectic so this chapter is shorter than i would of liked, i promise for a better chapter for 24

Reimei Yume - i try to keep a balance between comedy and drama, as i seem to be failing i will atempt a bit more seriousness

deltabeta26 - in any story i do i tend to power up several main characters and improve them, neji was just more skilled than in cannon

* * *

**The One Eye of the Demon**

**Chapter 23**

**Ambushing the Ambush of the Ambush**

**

* * *

  
**

Oto Nin charged through the ruins of the wall as what appeared to be feathers circled the arena. As they descended, all but the skilled shinobi fell victim to its genjutsu and became unconscious.

Naruto looked from the charging Nin to Shikamaru, who was quickly performing the seals to release the Genjutsu "They interrupted our match Shika."

"They did." Shikamaru responded.

"We have to kill them now don't we?"

"We do." Shikamaru responded.

With that Naruto let loose with his chopsticks, the wooden projectiles sinking into the chests of two men in the front rank.

Two more men were dropped by their own shadows rising out of the ground and snapping their owner's necks.

Naruto then raised a hand into the air and shouted an order. "BOYS!" He roared. "RELEASE THE HENGE!!"

The arena was filled with smoke, and nine-hundred-and-ninety-five Shadow Clones came into existence, before jumping into the melee.

"You thought ahead when you fought Neji." Shikamaru nodded approvingly as Naruto passed him the Despair. "Soon you'll be ready for big boy pants."

With a yell Naruto leapt over the first rank of shinobi and with Kitsune in a two handed grip, he split a man in two from head to groin.

* * *

Kakashi killed the Oto Nin in front of him with a stab to the neck, he knew the five enemies behind him were charging and knew that even at his level of skill he couldn't kill all of them.

He was pleasantly surprised as they promptly dropped dead, and he became aware of the man stood back to back with him although he failed to recognise the man.

"Tell me Hatake Kakashi," Said the man in a deep, calm voice. "Do you believe in fate?"

* * *

"Kukuku…" Orochimaru pulled the veil of the third Kazekage down and pulled off the fake face. "It is time Sarutobi-sensei."

He was annoyingly surprised when Sarutobi let out a yawn, even more so when he found a long Katana buried into his skull.

Orochimaru stared at the man who held the Katana, a long black cloak and long silver hair. Orochimaru rose to his feet, and the man holding the sword rose at the same time; as if balancing on the sword embedded between the snake masters eyes.

* * *

"Sakura!" Sasuke shook his girlfriend to wake her up. "Come on! Get up!"

Kankuro pulled him off her and said "I have a better idea."

"Let's hear it!" Sasuke shouted, eager to join the bloodbath.

Kankuro smiled and threw a Kunai at the sleeping Kunoichi.

Sakura caught it by the handle and tossed it aside mid-snore.

An Oto-nin screamed as the knife entered his skull.

"That'll do." Sasuke replied with a grin, leaping over the wall

* * *

The Oto Nin approached the only awake civilian still sat in the arena stands. "You going to run or what?"

The bearded man gave a smile at the Nin from beneath his leather hat, "My name is Chuck Norris."

"Oh sh..." The Oto Nin's chest exploded in a fountain of gore from the cowboy's roundhouse kick. "…it…" the nin finished as his head landed on his own pelvis. "Hey, where'd my chest go!?"

"Same place your grandkids went." The man replied as he delivered a rising kick through the man's legs and eyes. "All over the walls."

* * *

The blue haired youth faced the fifty or so Oto Nin with an air of boredom, the thirty or so bodies of other Oto Nin around him deterred them from attacking him immediately.

_Fear's awake Anger beats loud_

The youth nodded his head to the music blaring in his ears and leapt forward.

_Face reality Never be charity_

He put a hand in front of him as a card came into existence.

_The enemy you're fighting covers whole society_

He moved his hand to the side and the Oto Nin's heard glass breaking.

_Mommy's not here gotta fight_

One Ninja summoned up the courage to charge at the blue haired boy.

_Right here shadow 10 o'clock direction_

"AAARRGHH!" He screamed as his own chest was pierced with his own sword

_Seize the moment They destroy the nation_

The Ninja had not even gotten within ten feet of the boy.

_Your rhyme is slow-motion Give me motivation_

"Anyone else?" The young man asked as he threw a card into the crowd.

_Freaked out now And dead on arrival_

One Oto nin caught it, reading the inscription. "World?" He asked.

_Round up around Spit out all over_

The Oto Nin crumpled the card in his hand and threw it on the ground.

_Rhyme like a rolling stone Come in the crowd_

"Use the Combined Jutsu Orochimaru-Sama taught us!" Shouted the captain.

_Watch out the moon They diss you loud_

The surrounding Nin nodded and prepared the hand seals.

_Guess what this sound It bombs whole ground_

The young man sighed with boredom and drew a silver object from his pocket.

_So round up_

He put it to his head as the Oto Nin's completed their Jutsu.

_Don't ease your pace Cuz enemy is brutal_

"Alilat." The boy said as he pulled the trigger.

_Moment of truth There ain't no truce_

A dark, red polished stone appeared above the boy with the sound of an explosion.

_You're the only one One world One love_

A white light surrounded the boy as he was bombarded with Jutsu of all natures.

_But the battle goes on_

The bodies of his enemies were destroyed as the Jutsu's rebounded upon their casters.

"Shadows of Mass Destruction." The boy said as the light and the stone faded from existence.

_Oooh yeah! Dadada dadumdada!_

He walked through the ashes, looking for more enemies to face.

_Baby Baby! Dadadumdum, Dadadumdum!_

* * *

"And you are?" The fact that the man he was speaking to had a katana in his skull didn't seem to faze Orochimaru in the slightest

"How rude of me," Said the man with a sarcastic smile. "I am Sephiroth, and your life ends tonight."

* * *

"Hey, wake up!"

Haku shook Temari awake in the medical bay as the other injured genin were being rushed from the sick by. "What's happening?" She asked.

"Remember the Konoha invasion plan dad was discussing with that guy but turned down?" Gaara asked Temari, who nodded. "Well, the guy decided to go along with it anyways, so now the Suna nins are siding up with Konoha against the sound."

"Also, Your father is dead." Shino reported to them. "Orochimaru was wearing his corpse the whole time."

"Wh-what!?" Temari gasped. "D-dad!?"

"Kankuro's fighting with the others." Gaara told his sister. "There'll be time for mourning later."

Temari jumped from the bed with disgust. "I know that. Where the hell is my fan!?"

* * *

"Alright Maito Gai." Bruce Lee said as he observed the upcoming Oto-nin. "Let's show these fools how to fight with their fists."

He nodded reverently, hiding how ecstatic he was at the chance to fight alongside the fabled martial artist. "Yes sir!"

Bruce merely nodded at his son as he punched a fist through the nearest Oto-nin's forehead protector, his fists coming out of the other side of the man's skull, now covered in blood and gray matter.

* * *

"Attack!" The yell was soon followed by a wave of Kunai and Shrunken that decimated the rear ranks of the Oto shinobi in the Arena as Suna and Konoha Nin rushed into the arena and engaged the Oto Nin.

* * *

Sasuke grabbed a sword from a corpse and sent lightning down it, ready to charge. "Gagh!" He screamed as he drew his hand back from the melting blade. "Dammit…" He said as he looked back on the trail of molten weapons he'd tried to use. "Aren't there any decent Oto blacksmiths?"

"Here's a loaner." Said a young man in black as he passed a small broadsword to Sasuke.

"Thanks." Sasuke said as he sent a Chidori along the blade, pleasantly surprised when it didn't melt. "Sasuke Uchiha." He told the man, looking at him for the first time.

The young man had black hair that spiked at the back, and drew a broadsword larger than he was tall from his back. "The name's Zack Fair," The young man said as he got into his battle stance. "SOLDIER, 1st class."

Sasuke stood side by side with the SOLDIER, getting into a similar battle stance. "Then let's stand and fight," Sasuke said with a grin as he faced the oncoming Oto Nin. "SOLDIER first class Zack."

Zack let out a laugh. "Sounds like something a friend of mine once said to me." He tensed his legs and jumped into the fray as Sasuke jumped onto his sword and jumped deeper into the mass of ninja. "HA!" The SOLDIER shouted as he swung the Buster Sword and cleared through flesh and bone.

He landed on the stairs and slipped in the blood and gore, knocking down the Oto-nin as he recovered and cut down thirteen more enemies in mid air. "YEAH!" He shouted as he landed cleanly, sword in one hand like a wing before pouncing again into battle.

* * *

"Attack!" A group of black clad shinobi with strange headbands charged into the arena and targeted the Suna shinobi.

"This is getting old real fast." Naruto noted as he cut through another set of ribs, his blond hair stained red with blood.

"Troublesome." Shikamaru sighed as he plunged the Despair into another Oto-nin's throat.

"Hey, how's about using that secret technique you were saving for me?" Naruto asked. "I mean, I doubt we're gonna get our match after this."

Shikamaru shook his head. "Something's telling me it wouldn't work here."

'_**Tell him he's chicken.'**_

"Kyuubi say's you're a chicken." Naruto reported as he cut through another skull.

"Tell him I don't care." Shikamaru sighed as he stabbed again.

'_**Make sounds like a chicken.'**_ Kyuubi urged Naruto. _**'He'll so do it then.'**_

'_How about you just help me fight?'_ Naruto asked._ 'I'm getting pretty tired.'_


	24. called into battle

**Because i wanted an epic chapter to follow a crap one**

_Bloody Kunai, if you liked the P3 MC here, you should read Persona 3: Fairly English Story. You can find it in RWC's Favourites._

**And yes that is samjaz deciding to promote his story**

**One Eye of the Demon**

**Chapter 24**

**Called Into Battle**

"_**I have an idea Kit."**_

Naruto dodged a swing thrown by an Oto nin and shoved a kunai into his face. _'Let's hear it then!'_

"_**You remember that little experimental project that you never tried?"**_ Kyube suggested. _**"You ever get around to finishing it?"**_

'_Yeah.'_ Naruto thought as he chopped an Oto-nin's arm off. _'But you said it wouldn't work?'_

"_**I've been wrong before Kit."**_ The Kyuubi admitted. _**"But try it out."**_

Naruto jumped back from the melee and bit his thumb, speeding through hand seals before hitting his palm against the floor, "Kuchiyose no Jutsu!" Red lines instead of the usual black spread from where his palm touched the floor. There was a large burst of smoke.

When the smoke cleared a house sized Kyube stood in the arena with Naruto kneeling on his head, "It worked." Naruto said with disbelief.

The Kyuubi swung its four tails "**Almost.**" It stated with a loud voice. "**But good enough.**"

* * *

"HOLY HELL WHAT THE CRAP IS THAT!?" Haku shouted as she ran out of the corridor and into the stands.

"Did-did Naruto release the fox?" Gaara asked in disbelief.

"_**Don't be thick."**_ Shukaku told Gaara. _**"It's just a summon using the fox's power. Now get in there and fight!"**_

"Alright." Gaara said, shaking his head. "We'll assume that the fox is on our side, but for now let's… Temari?" He asked, looking for his sister.

"CRAZY ASS DAMN FOX I'LL BLOODY KILL YOU!!"

"Ah, forgot about that…" Gaara sighed. "Hopefully Naruto will knock some sense into her. You still here Haku?"

She wasn't.

"Talking to myself then." Gaara sighed. "Fine."

He span around and delivered a crushing kick to the wall, reducing a large portion of it to dust. Gaara mixed the dust in with his own sand, then rose into the Melee on a cloud of gray sand. "Shukaku." He said. "We're going to have to kill today."

"_**Are you allowing me to attack?"**_ Shukaku asked.

'_Just this once.'_ Gaara replied, sitting on the flying sand. _'To avenge father.'_

He felt the demon inside of him grin. It was going to be a bloodbath.

* * *

Orochimaru bent backwards and let the sword slide out of his skull before he lashed out with a kick that forced Sephiroth to jump backwards, as Orochimaru's two guards suddenly split into four.

"Hiruzen Sarutobi?" Sephiroth asked as he descended onto the balcony edge, ignoring Orochimaru and his minions.

"And who might you be?" Sarutobi asked, throwing off his Hokage cloak to reveal his old Ninja Gi.

"My name is Sephiroth." The SOLDIER answered, moving to side up alongside the Hokage. "And I will prevent anybody from interfering with your battle against your old student."

"That's our job." Said a young boy with dark blue hair as his twin crawled out of his back. "Ukon." He said. "Let's get the barrier ready."

"Doing it already, Sakon." The other twin replied, making the seals as he crawled. "Jirobo. Tayuya. Kidomaru." He said. "Take care of granny with the sword."

Sephiroth smiled as a purple barrier rose above the Hokage box and covered the space above them. "Well. You certainly are confident." He raised the Masamune into the ceiling and sliced it away. "But that confidence is misplaced."

He brought the roof down.

* * *

Sakura walked through the mass of attacking Ninja, dodging and countering blows as easily as she slept, completely under the sleeping genjutsu. Every counter she made moved her into the path of another attack, which was countered as she moved into another attack.

She was a sleeping whirlwind of carnage, but woe betide her if she actually woke up.

"SAKURA-SAN!" Rock Lee called as he jumped down into the battle. "ARE YOU ALLRIGHT!?"

Which she did.

"AAAGGHH!!"

* * *

Sasuke cleaved off another head, before turning to the scream. "Sakura!" He gasped, before leaping towards the sound.

"Hey, you just gonna leave a brother here?" Zack asked as he cut down four ninjas in a single blow. "Bit cowardly, don't ya think?"

"My girlfriends in trouble!" Sasuke shouted back, stabbing through Oto flesh. "Ho's before Bro's!"

"You suck!" Shouted the SOLDIER jokingly. "GO!"

Sasuke turned forward and ran as the SOLDIER jumped back. "HHRARGH!" Zack roared, launching a powerful shockwave into the maw.

* * *

When the rubble cleared, Sephiroth and Sarutobi stood together facing Orochimaru on the roof. In each corner of the purple box was one of the five sound-nins, with Sakon standing next to Orochimaru.

"Order your men to stand down." Sephiroth ordered the Hokage. "If not, the force field will destroy them."

"STAND DOWN!" The Hokage roared at the charging ANBU. "DO NOT INTERFERE!!"

"Hahahaha!" Orochimaru laughed. "So you truly believe that you can face me with your friend!?!

"Yes." Sephiroth said from behind. "I can." He stabbed through Orochimaru, who liquefied before re-materialising beside the sword. "But I've been ordered not to." He slashed to the side and decapitated Sakon.

"BROTHER!!" Ukon roared as he broke out of formation.

"IDIOT!" Tayuya shouted. "THE FIELD WON'T HOLD!!"

But the grief stricken brother charged regardless, only to be cut down by the Masamune.

Orochimaru laughed as Ukon fell to the floor. "Your subordinates die and you laugh!?" Sarutobi shouted at the snake master. "What kind of monster are you!?"

Orochimaru stopped laughing and started making hand seals with a smile on his face. "One who surpasses even death."

Two coffins rose from the ground and consumed the two brothers, before sliding to where Orochimaru was stood.

"Say hello to my new friends, sensei." Orochimaru joked as the coffins opened.

Revealing the first and second Hokage respectively.

* * *

Ninja's were mowed down by the green armoured giant's unidentifiable weapon. It was black and vaguely rod-shaped, but it fired steel pellets faster than the eye could track.

Oto weapons weren't going to cut it here. "RANTON!" One ninja called, making the hand seals Kabuto had taught him. "REIZA SAKASU!"

Beams of electricity hurled themselves from the ninja towards the Spartan, but flashed out against his shield as the olive green behemoth rushed the ninja, slamming him against the ground, pointing the weapon at him.

"Wh-what are you!" Shouted the Oto-nin, speaking his last words.

"Spartan 117." Replied the armoured giant from behind his golden visor. "Master Chief."

He shot a bullet through the Storm release ninja's skull before continuing to fall back.

* * *

"M-master!" Sarutobi gasped. "Lord Hokage!!"

"They're mere puppets." Sephiroth warned as Orochimaru laughed. "Empty shells with their appearance."

"Wrong." Orochimaru laughed, lifting two Kunai with a tag on each one. "They contain their original souls, dragged back here from the void." He placed a kunai into the back of each corpses head. "And now, they're my obedient servants."

"A Jutsu that requires a dying sacrifice…" Sarutobi whispered. "You would have used that even if Sephiroth had not arrived, would you!?"

"I originally wished to use my two agents used in the exam." Orochimaru shrugged. "But, unfortunately, that idiot Dosu killed them out of _mercy_ before they could be useful."

Sarutobi clenched his fist with anger. "We need to eliminate those two first." Sephiroth said with calmness. "I will take the one in red armour." He said, gesturing to the First Hokage, "You take the one in blue."

Sarutobi glared at his old master, the Second Hokage. "Do you really think it's them?" He asked.

"If they are, then they no longer have any will of their own." Sephiroth replied sadly. "It would be kinder to end their simulacrum of life here and now."

Sarutobi nodded sadly. "My foolish pupil… have you ever faced this before?" The Hokage asked the SOLDIER.

"I was the errant one." Sephiroth sighed. "And I am still atoning for what I did in madness."

"Attack them." Orochimaru ordered, and the two corpses charged forward.

Sephiroth speedblitzed to intercept the first Hokage, who blocked the Masamune with a kunai. The Second threw a punch at Sarutobi, who blocked and countered with a kick, which connected with the Second's jaw, only for him to fall back and begin making hand seals.

"Suiton!" Shouted the Second Hokage. "Suishoha!"

Water swirled around Tobirama Senju, which then surged forward towards Sarutobi. He countered it by creating a large earth wall as a shield, which the water flowed around.

However, there was so much water that the whole box was soon flooded, and Sarutobi was forced to climb his defence as land.

"Are you alright?" Sephiroth asked, taking to the air as Orochimaru and his two puppets surfaced.

"Yes." Sarutobi replied, panting for breath. "Why did you stop?" He asked.

"I cannot stand on water." Sephiroth replied as their three enemies climbed onto their feet, standing on top of the water. "I can merely levitate."

Sarutobi sighed. "So I'm on my own now, am I?"

Sephiroth smiled sadistically. "Not at all." He said, raising his hand to the sky as it darkened. "I'm just going to have to summon instead."

Then the sky lit up with fire and brimstone as it burst through the barrier, gaining a purple hue as it coursed towards the two dead Hokage and their new master.

* * *

Kakashi forced a Chidori through the black-clad ninja, only for the ninja to disappear in a cloud of smoke. "Dammit!" He swore, cutting behind him to finally find blood. "What the hell are these guys?" He asked, Sharingan spinning as he dodged around the falling magma.

Chuck Norris came crashing down, crushing a black-clad skull beneath his boot. "Kage-nins!" He shouted, delivering a roundhouse kick to another ninja, crushing his skull. "I used to be one of their best Jonin!" He said, launching a powerful punch into another ninja's skull.

"And now you're a mere missing nin." The ninja said after blocking the cowboy's fist. "Still got a nice bounty on your hat though." The ninja delivered a powerful kick to Chuck's ribs, sending him flying.

"Norris!" Kakashi shouted, before charging at the Kage-nin with his Chidori.

The ninja disappeared, but Kakashi caught the movement with his Sharingan and changed the direction of his attack, slicing through the ninja's arm. "GAH!" The ninja shouted as he launched a cloud of Shuriken at Kakashi.

Kakashi quickly deflected the metal stars with the same Jutsu. The dark cloaked man drew a gun from his cloak and fired a bullet into the ninja's head, leaving Kakashi free to continue fighting the other ninjas as Chuck recovered, charging again head first.

* * *

Then fire consumed them all.

"**Damn.**" Kyube growled as he stopped breathing fire. "**Kagegakure…**"

"That can't be good, whatever it is." Naruto commented as he caught his breath. His clones were rapidly getting slaughtered by the black ninjas, though the Oto-nins weren't that much of a threat in themselves.

"**The village hidden in the shadows.**" Kyube replied. "**Their leader leaves gifts in to every child all over the world in a single night as a warning to their parents.**"

"Really?" Naruto asked. "I never got squat."

"**You never had parents to threaten.**"

Naruto frowned. "That hurt!"

"**No.**" The fox swished one of his tails, crushing two dozen ninja effortlessly. "**THAT hurt.**"

"I think you might've got Kankuro there." Naruto commented.

"**He'll live.**" Kyube replied, roaring flame again. "**Unfortunately.**"

"Might've been Shizune actually…" Naruto squinted.

"**Holy hell are you serious!?!?**" Kyube got into an uncharacteristic panic as he pulled his tail back. "**GET THE DAMNED MEDICS!!**"

He looked over the crushed bodies and found only Oto-nin and Kage-nin. "**Not funny.**" Kyube spat, drowning a couple of ninja. "**There are some things you just don't joke about Kit.**"

"It was hilarious." Temari glared, having finally climbed on top of Kyube's head. "You owe me an apology fox."

"**No I don't.**" Kyube replied as he swiped against the horde of ninja. "**And why the hell isn't that Jiraiya freak summoning any frogs!?**"

"He's probably drunk somewhere." Naruto sighed. "Where's Haku?" Naruto asked Temari.

"Down there fighting." Temari admitted. "Aren't you going to ask how I am?"

"You're clearly alive, so I was gonna ask about you next." Naruto sighed. "You okay?"

"Dad's dead." She admitted. "Don't think it's really sunk in though."

Naruto sighed. "It gets worse." He said, pointing to the purple box on the roof. "The guy who killed your dad is behind that thing, so we can't get to him."

"Who else is there?" Temari asked, leaning forward.

"Old man Hokage," Naruto told her, "And some gray haired dude with a bigass katana."

"**Nodachi.**" Kyube growled. "**Get your swords right.**"

"Whatever." Naruto replied. "Back to killing. I think Gaara's keeping score."

"**Not on my watch.**" Kyube grinned. "**You been keeping count Kit?**"

"Nope." Naruto replied. "They're your kills."

"Um…" Temari hesitated. "Are… all your conversations like this?"

"**They normally involve more boobs.**" Kyube admitted before breathing hellfire into the Kage-nins. "**But yeah. Why?**"

Temari just sighed and shook her head. "Alright then." She said getting up. "I'm off to fight. You coming?" She asked Naruto.

"I've had enough of a break." Naruto replied, standing up and stretching. "Give 'em hell." He told Kyube.

"**I'm not that cruel.**" Kyube hissed as he stepped on an Oto-nin's legs, leaving him alive but screaming.

* * *

When Sephiroth stopped summoning the meteors, the purple box was filled completely with trees, turning the battlefield into a jungle. "Wood release…" Sarutobi gasped as Sephiroth slashed open a clearing. "It really is the First…"

Sarutobi then bit his thumb and slammed it against the stone he was standing on, summoning Enma, the monkey king. "What do you want old man?" Enma asked bitterly.

"I need you to transform into the Adamantine staff." Hiruzen told him. "Quickly!"

Enma sighed. "You've grown old Sarutobi… Fine." The monkey king performed the henge, becoming the powerful staff for the Hokage to wield.

"Here they come." Sephiroth warned as the First and Second Hokage's corpses charged forward. "Don't bother trying to kill them." Sephiroth warned, "I chopped the First into pieces and he regenerated."

"So we're going to have to go straight for Orochimaru, are we?" Sarutobi spat. "Can you buy me an opening?"

"Of course." Sephiroth smiled shrewdly before charging at the two Hokage. "Beware, he may summon the Forth."

Sarutobi winced at the thought before jumping through the jungle.

* * *

Angeal cut through the Kage-nins, back to back with Genesis. "This isn't good." He said, clutching his wounded shoulder.

"Indeed it is not." Genesis admitted. "Truly, this is the winter of our discontent."

"I told you to stop quoting Shakespeare when we were on a mission!"

"But the man was a genius!" Genesis argued as he cut through flesh.

"He did it for the money and the bitches." Angeal sighed as he fought desperately. "Just concentrate dammit!"

Sarutobi's staff crashed down onto Orochimaru, who blocked with the Kusanagi. "I'm surprised that you could get past my puppets so easily, Sensei."

"Whose puppets?" Asked a deep voice as a powerful tree branch snaked its way at Orochimaru, who dodged just in time.

"You got some balls kiddo." Came another voice as water blasted through the forest, forcing broken tree branches and trunks into the space around Orochimaru, who dodged as fast as he could, escaping to safety.

The water cleared to show Sarutobi protected by a cage of Adamantine staffs, which vanished to the original staff. "Holy hell, those old guys can deliver a beating…" Enma gasped, opening an eye on the staff.

Standing ontop of a tree were the First and Second Hokage, holding a kunai each in their hands.

Attached to each kunai was the cursed tag Orochimaru had used to control them.

"H-HOW!?" Orochimaru roared. "How did this happen!?"

"I did it." Sephiroth glared as he strolled to Jinboro's corner. "And they're not happy." He said, stabbing through the barrier and killing the spider-nin.

"JINBORO!!" Kidomaru shouted from his corner. "THE HELL!?"

"Someone's getting fucked over here." The second Hokage boasted, cracking his knuckles. "And it's gonna be the ones who're getting fucked over down there."

Orochimaru looked over the edge to see a wave of Konoha-nins break through the wave, working together with the Suna-nins and the others against the Oto-nins and the Kage-nins. "Face it." Ordered the first Hokage. "Your life is over."

Orochimaru clenched his teeth as Sephiroth sliced Kidomaru's head off, leaving Tayuya as the only one left living. "Not a chance." He glared, tearing his face off.

"I AM IMMORTAL!!" Shouted a woman's voice.

"So you even completed that Jutsu…" Sarutobi spat as he approached his old student. "You're a disgrace to humanity and this village."

Orochimaru smiled as he returned his face to normal. "You say that, but you're the one who is dead."

"Huh?" Sarutobi asked before the Kusanagi stabbed his back.

* * *

"WHERE ARE THEY!?" Roared a bloodstained Naruto. "WHERE'S THE ENEMY!?"

"I-I think we got them all…" Haku said, also covered in blood.

Gaara came down to earth, snapping an Oto-nin's neck. "I think this was the last one…"

"**Sweet.**" Kyube replied, before vanishing in a puff of smoke.

"_**It's cold outside…"**_ He moaned inside Naruto's head.

"Pathetic…" Naruto sighed. "Alright, I'm gonna check on the old man!" He shouted as the Suna and Konoha-nins cheered.

* * *

"HIRUZEN!!" Shouted the first and second Hokage as Sarutobi fell to his knees.

"Hehehe…" Orochimaru laughed. "I've won…" He said. "I'VE WON!!"

"I cannot allow that." Sephiroth stated as the world turned black. "_Descend._" He said, the Masamune to Orochimaru's throat. "**Heartless Angel.**"

Orochimaru's face fell off, revealing the woman's face from before. "What… what did you…"

"I have robbed you of your chakra." Sephiroth stated. "I am not allowed to kill you, but I can reduce your power to that of a child's." He added this as he stabbed through Tayuya, and the force field fell apart as the First and Second Hokage's collapsed into dust. "Now run." Sephiroth ordered as a black wing grew from his back.

"Wh-what did you say!?" Orochimaru ordered as Sephiroth took to the sky and Sarutobi lay dying.

"You have enough Chakra for one Jutsu." Sephiroth said as the black wing enveloped him. "Use it wisely."

The wing fell apart as black feathers fell to the ground, Sephiroth having disappeared. "No…" Orochimaru said as he fell to his knees, clutching his head. "This can't be happening… THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING!!!"

"OLD MAN!!" Naruto shouted as he climbed to the broken roof, running to the Third Hokage. "You're gonna be okay!" Naruto shouted as he picked up the dying old man. "YOU'RE GONNA BE OKAY!!"

"Naruto…" Sarutobi asked. "Take… care… Of…"

"Don't say that..." Naruto pleaded. "DON'T YOU DARE DIE!!"

ANBU came rushing to the rooftop. "We'll take him to the hospital!" Their leader said as he took Sarutobi's barely conscious body. "Capture Orochimaru!"

"Yes!" Three of the ANBU nodded as Orochimaru turned into a giant white snake.

"_**You'll never kill ME!!**__" _Orochimaru hissed in his grotesque, serpentine form. "_**I AM IMMORTAL!! I AM A GOD!!**_"

"Shut it…" Naruto barked, getting to his feet.

"_**YOU THINK YOU CAN DEFEAT ME!?**_" Orochimaru roared. "_**I DON'T NEED CHAKRA TO DESTROY THIS PATHETIC VILLAGE!!**_"

"I SAID **SHUT IT!!**" Naruto roared, red chakra flowing around him. Bubbles began to form as a tail shot out from behind him. "**I'LL! KILL! YOU!!**"

"_**HA!**_" Orochimaru spat venom at the rage-consumed Naruto. "_**What can a little fox do against a mighty serpe-**_"

He was cut off by Naruto obliterating his body with crimson hellfire- the likes of which hadn't been seen in almost thirteen years.

Since the night the Kyuubi attacked Konoha.

* * *

The next day was deathly quiet. The Hokage had managed to survive his operation, but would now be paralysed from the waist down. He was still the Hokage, but it was clear that he wouldn't be in that office for much longer.

Naruto walked out of his room wearing only his pants, covered in dry blood. He had just woken up after passing out the previous day, although Kyube was still asleep.

How he had gotten home without anyone washing or changing him he had no idea, nor did he care, although he could guess the answer. "Haku…" He whispered to himself, walking towards the bathroom.

After washing himself clean, he dressed and walked into living room of his house to see Sakura chasing Haku. "Naruto!" Haku shouted when she noticed him, forgetting her pursuer and diving onto Naruto.

"Ugh…" Naruto groaned. "Morning…" He looked around. "Where is everyone?" He asked.

"Gaara and Kankuro had to go home." Sakura explained. "What with the Kazekage dead, they need to sort everything out."

"Temari?" Naruto asked worryingly.

"She's still in her room." Haku said, getting up. "Gaara said that she didn't want to come home yet…"

'_She seemed fine yesterday…'_ Naruto thought to himself as he got to his feet, before noticing what was in Sakura's hands. "Porn?" Naruto asked, snatching it off her.

"Look, it's none of my business what you read!" Sakura said angrily as she turned her head away, blushing. "But tell Haku to stop reading your… smut in the living room!"

Naruto passed it back to Sakura. "Not mine. And what she said." He added to Haku.

"Found it under Sasuke's pillow." Haku admitted. "He wasn't waking up so I had a root around."

"You found it _WHERE!?_" Sakura asked, red with anger before storming up to Sasuke's room.

After knocking on Temari's door resulted in silence. Naruto slipped in through the door and saw Temari sat at the top of her bed with red eyes from crying. Taking a look at Naruto she seemed to be about to say something before she suddenly dived at Naruto.

* * *

The blue haired youth stared at the card he had just drawn; he grinned and stood making a hand motion as he did so. Genesis stepped from shadows before the youth spoke, "Things are going according to plan, everyone but the MA team is to pull out."

**-}+{-**


	25. Aftermath and the Fifth

_Hey everyone, SamJaz here. Sorry about the delay, we've just been doing other stuff until now, but we promise to get back on schedule with this story from now on!_

_**So who thinks that the sharingan is just too powerful now?**  
_

**The One Eye Of The Demon**

**Chapter 25**

**Aftermath and the Fifth**

After leaving Temari's room, Naruto vaulted himself onto the sofa next to Sasuke who was reading a textbook that Kankuro had left behind.

"Elemental Manipulation, huh?" Naruto asked.

"Apparently I'm dual natured." Sasuke replied, his eyes not leaving the page. "Fire and Thunder." He glanced up at Naruto. "Does Kyube know if they can be mixed?" He asked. "Like, Earth and Water chakra makes Wood element?"

"_**Ever heard of a wonderful little thing called Napalm?"**_ Kyube asked the two boys.

"Napalm apparently." Naruto replied. "Any idea what that is?"

"No clue, but I'd rather figure it out myself, so don't tell Naruto." Sasuke asked the Kyube.

"_**Fair enough."**_ Kyube decided. _**"I'm guessing you can read him like a book."**_

Sasuke ignored the Kyuubi, and Naruto realised that Sasuke couldn't hear him without his Sharingan, so he re-iterated Kyube's point.

"Pretty much anyone I'm close to at this point." Sasuke sighed, closing the book on his finger wearily. "Things are about to hit the fan." He added.

"I've noticed." Naruto replied with a sage like nod. "Big time."

Sasuke dropped his book onto the floor and sighed. Naruto saw and recognised the slightly dejected look and knew the problem. "Sakura threw away your porn?" He asked.

"Burnt it." Sasuke sighed. "Apparently Yuri is of the devil and belongs in hell."

Naruto laughed. "I'll get Haku to get you some more." He offered. "I don't even bother buying my own since I found her library."

"Thanks. She has a library?" Sasuke asked.

"It _was_ a walk-in safe, but apparently some things are more important than Jutsu scrolls."

"I bet you've got clones studying them as we speak." Sasuke sighed.

"The scrolls or the porn?" Naruto asked with a grin.

"Both." Sasuke grinned. "You off to Shikamaru?" He asked.

Naruto nodded in response to Sasuke's question before asking his own.

"How did you know?" Naruto asked.

"Everything's about to go down the crapper," Sasuke replied, "You've got some secret mission from your dad to do, you've got a deadpan snarker inside your skull and you have two girlfriends that you're living with and know about your bigamy." Sasuke leaned over to the table and opened a bottle of soy sauce. "You need a plan and well, Shikamaru's a genius."

"Got that right…" Naruto replied, before looking at Sasuke with disgust. "Dude, you're actually drinking that!?"

Sasuke pulled the bottle from his lips. "It's morning, and the only other drink in your fridge is booze!" He defended himself. "And it's pretty good once you get used to the psychosis!"

"What psychosis?" Naruto asked with concern.

"I dunno, but I'm flying this couch to the moooooooooooooon!"

"_**That's your cue to get the hell outta here before it becomes your fault Kit."**_

_**

* * *

  
**_

On the journey through Konoha, Naruto was experiencing something he wasn't used to; Admiration. Apparently he was no longer just a demon child.

He was Konoha's demon child, and they were proud of him.

No sign of an apology though, but Naruto figured that he'd just have to take what he was given.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, Naruto my boy…" Jiraiya said to Naruto as he hooked an arm across Naruto's shoulders, "But you are currently living with both of your girlfriends without parental supervision."

"Yeah, so?" Naruto asked.

"And am I also correct in the assumption that these two fine ladies are both aware and supportive of your bigamy?" Jiraiya asked. "One of them being a lesbian and a Naruto-phile, and the other is enough of a pervert to watch you bang the first girl, so long as she gets her turn on the Naruto-wagon?"

Jiraiya then pulled Naruto around to face him, holding the boy by both shoulders as he looked him in the eye. "So why is it that my sources can confirm that both of these two girls still have their virginity?" He asked.

That one question, in Naruto's mind, equated to the words "Oh glorious Naruto-sama! I hear that you have developed the Uzumaki Demon Torture! Please, oh please let me have the honour of being the one you test it upon, oh mighty one!"

* * *

The doctors stared at the mass of what was supposed to be Jiraiya that lay on the hospital bed, it was a marvel at how the thing was still alive with the way his kneecaps had been attached to his elbows, how his spine had been folded and how many bladed weapons had been used to inflict maximum pain whilst keeping blood loss to a minimum.

"_**It does beg the question though. Why are you still a virgin, Kit?"**_

"DUDE!" Naruto shouted in the hospital corridors. "I'M LIKE TWELVE!!"

Naruto then looked around, then walked hurriedly for the stairs, feeling very silly.

"Never should've brought the old man here in the first place…"

* * *

"Was your trip a productive one then, hmm?"

The blue haired youth smiled to the hunched-over man as he shuffled a deck of cards and placed it upon the table.

"See for yourself." He offered.

The card was black, with the numerals XIII emblazoned upon it and a sombre skull staring up at them.

* * *

Shikamaru was meditating in the family forest when he opened his eyes and lay back, hands behind his head. "Hey Naruto." He sighed.

Naruto fell down from the branches and landed next to his friend. "Ya know, if I wasn't so good at sneaking up on everyone else, I'd think I was useless at it."

Shikamaru sighed as Naruto lay down opposite him. "This is going to be troublesome, isn't it?" He asked.

Naruto didn't bother asking why Shikamaru knew he had a problem. Naruto was clever, but Shikamaru was _smart_. "Danzo's been chosen as the fifth Hokage." Naruto told him.

Shikamaru scowled for half a second. "Troublesome." He muttered. He remembered when he used to come to the Nara household, demanding that Naruto be put into ROOT, which was basically Danzo's child ninja slave plant.

Naruto removed the bandage covering his right eye with a sigh. "What do we do now?" He asked, demon eye contracting in the new light. "Even I know that Danzo will send this place down the drain."

"We need something on him." Shikamaru decided. "ROOT'll make it too bothersome to take him out directly, so we need some leverage to control him."

Naruto grimaced. "Mind reading then."

Shikamaru nodded. "If ROOT gets in the way, then…"

"I'll have to leave…" Naruto finished, with a conflicted look on his face.

* * *

"You wanted to see me Hokage-sama?" Kakashi asked as he looked upon the weathered face of the Third.

"Yes…" Sarutobi sighed from his hospital bed. "How much do you trust Naruto?" He asked.

Kakashi gave the old man a little eye smile. "With my life." He replied.

Sarutobi smiled. "Then I should tell you this." The old man replied. "Naruto's more elaborate pranks were planned by Shikamaru."

Kakashi couldn't see any connection between these two facts, so he hid his confusion and listened.

"As we speak, Naruto and Shikamaru are plotting." Sarutobi told Kakashi. "Normally, this is merely problematic, but with Kami's involvement in this situation, what we have is Pandora's Box and a young boy with a crowbar."

Kakashi realised the severity of the situation. "Shikamaru strategizes… Naruto executes…"

"This begs the question…" Sarutobi sighed. "Will you follow Naruto?"

* * *

Naruto flipped onto his feet and walked some distance from Shikamaru. "We were interrupted last time." He pointed out.

Shikamaru smirked and rolled into a crouch. "Let's go." He taunted, bringing his hands together to form a circle.

Naruto drew the Despair cautiously, his demonic chakra reacting to something malevolent. Something dark. Something evil.

Then Naruto saw the darkness rise into Shikamaru's hand. "Heh…" He laughed. "What am I getting all worried about?" He asked. "You're ultimate attack is shadow manipulation!"

Then he moved as fast as he could to dodge the black spike that shot for his face. "WHAT THE CRAP!?" He gasped.

Then the wide grin appeared in the blackness. _"hELLO…_"The mouth said to Naruto, who was terrified of this… thing Shikamaru had summoned.

"_**Get yourself together Kit!"**_ Kyube snarled. _**"I'm not gonna cover your ass in this fight!"**_

Naruto shook his head clear, then ran for the Shikamaru, blade at the ready. More black spikes came from Shikamaru's hand, but they collapsed at the chakra-rejecting touch of the Despair.

"That all you got!?" Naruto laughed, charging.

"_bEHIND yOU…"_

Naruto ducked and span around to slice at the first spike, which had turned around to stab him in the back. Like the others, it collapsed at the touch of the Despair, but when Naruto turned to cut the next spike, his blade was blocked.

Shikamaru was holding a black sword with white teeth covering the blade, and a crazed, blue eye at the hilt. "This is more than mere chakra…" Shikamaru grunted, using both hands to match the strength of Naruto's one handed weapon.

Naruto twisted the Despair, trying to gain purchase, then let lose a roundhouse kick for Shikamaru, who blocked it with a black, child-like hand from the ground. Despite its immature shape, the tiny fingers were both powerful and sharp, to the point where blood flowed freely from Naruto's leg.

Naruto gritted his teeth against the pain, then twisted his body to deliver an Axe kick to Shikamaru, who merely collapsed into the ground, letting Naruto fall into the dirt.

"I know your power." Shikamaru told Naruto as he walked out of an eye that appeared on a tree trunk. "You're like a hurricane when you fight, an unstoppable force that destroys anything in its path and leaves chaos in its wake. How was I supposed to match up to that?" He asked.

"You became something untouchable…" Naruto replied, getting up to his feet. "The Shadow."

Shikamaru nodded. "Course, it's not all just running away and hiding behind spikes." He shrugged, closing his eyes. "Eventually you'd get me, so I learnt this." Shikamaru opened them, showing two blue eyes with rings, and the world turned to blackness.

Naruto's normal eye immediately flared demonic, and hellfire consumed the darkness, which writhed and sliced at the crimson flames. It was a Genjutsu, a battle of wills between Naruto and Shikamaru: The Demon and the Nightmare.

A fox's face appeared in the flames beside Naruto. It roared at the darkness, as a red eye's crow slowly emerged from the shadows beside Shikamaru.

"_**I knew this power…"**_ Kyube growled beside Naruto. _**"Morrigan…"**_

"_Good to see you too, my dear fox."_ The crow cackled with glee. _"All power, no brains as usual?"_

Naruto threw the Despair into the ground between Shikamaru and himself, creating a spiralling vortex of the red flames and the black shadows, drawing the chaos back into the ground as the forest returned to existence.

"Who's Morrigan?" Naruto panted, unused to having so little chakra.

"There's more to this world than the tailed beasts…" Shikamaru gasped, gulping in air before standing back up. "Daemon's are just better at hiding."

"_**Tell him that we're better at killing!"**_ Kyube hissed. _**"It's the perfect comeback!"**_

"We're better at killing." Naruto sneered, agreeing that it was a good taunt. "Hell, you just admitted that all your monster is good for is running away!"

"I never said that." Shikamaru sneered, raising a hand to point at his feet.

Naruto was doing the same thing.

"You son of a bitch…" Naruto grunted. "How the hell did I fall for that!?"

"Because you're stupid." Shikamaru laughed, bringing up a black fist from the ground to punch Naruto in the Jaw.

Naruto withstood the attack, and several more as the shadows pummelled him repeatedly.

"Finished..?" He asked, looking at Shikamaru.

"I've still got some chakra left…" Shikamaru grunted, taking in a deep gulp of breath.

"Did you know that in the east, there's a type of Taijutsu called Muay Thai?" Naruto asked. "It's become a sport, where he two fighters beat the crap out of each other for five three-minute rounds?"

"You asking for a break?" Shikamaru asked, raising an eyebrow. "That's not like you."

"No." Naruto snickered. "I'm just saying that the winner of those matches is often the one who lets the other guy wail on him for the first couple of rounds while he pretends to get his ass beat down." Naruto grinned. "This way, the other guy tires quicker, and he can figure out how to beat his fighting style."

"And besides." Naruto added as the swelling on his black eye lessened visibly. "I'd rather have a few bruises than no Chakra."

"Ah crap." Shikamaru sighed, realising the mess he's gotten himself into as he mimicked Naruto's movement of drawing the Kitsune from its seath.

Shikamaru was then forced to bring his hands together in a kendo stance as Naruto charged his blade with Wind Chakra. "Ready to get your ass handed to ya?" Naruto asked with a smirk.

Then Shikamaru scratched the back of his head. "This is really too troublesome…"

Naruto realised that Shikamaru wasn't using Shadow possession anymore, but the black line on the ground was still there. He jumped out of the way as black hands rose from the earth to grab him, launching his Wind release at the shadowy limbs, slicing them apart as more hands came from the forest to grab him.

Naruto hacked and slashed against them as Shikamaru calmly walked towards the Shortsword that Naruto had stabbed into the earth earlier, then pulled it out. Darkness filled the forest again, and the black limbs began to drag Naruto into the abyss with childlike glee.

Then he exploded in a cloud of smoke.

Shikamaru just stood there in awe, then slapped his forehead at his stupidity.

Shikamaru was smart.

Naruto was _clever._

_

* * *

  
_

Later that day, most of the Ninja in Konoha were gathered outside the Hokage's tower as Danzo walked onto the balcony, adorned in the robes and hat that now marked him as the Gondaime Hokage.

'_So, we exchange one cripple for another…_' Naruto thought to himself.

"_**Something seem wrong to you?"**_ Kyube asked Naruto.

'_You mind read him already?'_ Naruto asked.

"_**Mind Reading is a precise art kit, which is why you hate doing it so much."**_ Kyube replied. _**"Hearing thoughts, spirit walking, they're all easy enough, but Mind Reading is both difficult and rarely pleasant."**_

'_What're you getting at?'_

"_**His mind is like a fortress with the gates locked and barred, the drawbridge raised, and sharks in the moat."**_ Kyube replied. _**"But you can see some pretty disturbing stuff through the window."**_

Naruto sighed, knowing enough about minds to recognise that Kyube wasn't making a metaphor. He locked onto Danzo's visible eye with his own demonic eye, and he was not prepared for what he saw.

"Itachi's the good guy…" The statement was just a whisper.

"_**Well fuck me."**_

_**

* * *

  
**_

**-}+{-**

**  
So who knows what Kami is yet?**


	26. Plottery

**Well here we are once again, chapter 26, A message from my freind, co-conspirator and beta, SamJaz**

_Hey everyone, long time no see. RWC's spent a while wondering what the hell to do with this story next to get it to the next plot point, so I'm helping him out._

_See, writing is like gravity. You're scared to do it at first, but you just need a little push to get you going._

_Writing is also like insanity. But I'm sure you already knew that._

* * *

**One Eye Of The Demon**

**Chapter 26**

**Plottery**

* * *

Naruto dragged Sasuke to the hospital for some answers. The third Hokage should have them, and even though he's not able to walk anymore, he's more than capable of answering questions that really, really needed answering.

"I'm sorry boys." Sarutobi laughed. "I can't help you there."

Naruto sat down next to the old man. "Old man, I have a lot of respect for you." He told him. "You've practically been a father to me all my life, even though you didn't do much to protect me from the village."

"I did what I could." Sarutobi sighed. "And I apologise to your father every day for my failure, but the council had my hands tied."

"You always had the option of obliterating them and making a new one." Sasuke pointed out. "But that's not why we're here."

"Old man." Naruto repeated, leaning close to Sarutobi and bringing his thumb and forefinger very close to each other next to his eye. "I am _this_ close to committing high treason. I'll either kill Danzo for what he did, or I'll kill you torturing the information from you."

Sarutobi sighed. "The Kyuubi has changed you." He said. "I'm sure he has your best interests at heart, like you say, but once upon a time you would never have considered either of those as options."

"_**He's right Kit. Without me, you'd be a peace-loving hippy."**_

Naruto sighed. "Please Sarutobi-san." He pleaded. "We need to know."

Sarutobi sighed, then cast a silence Jutsu around them. "Yes." He answered. "Itachi was forced to murder the Uchiha clan."

"Why?" Sasuke replied, fist shaking. "All this time… I've hated my brother with all my being… SO NOW YOU SAY THAT YOU'RE THE ONE I SHOULD HATE!?"

"You shouldn't hate." Sarutobi told the boy, leaning forward and putting his hands together in sadness. "But the fault lies with your father."

"My… what?" Sasuke shouted.

"In the years before the Uchiha massacre, Itachi was our spy within your clan." The old man explained. "He reported the inner workings of the clan to the council and I."

Sarutobi sighed. "It came to light that your father had gathered the entire clan and they began to plot a coup d'état."

"Pot a coolie hat?" Naruto asked. "Weird, but what's so bad about that?"

"_**Plot a coup d'état, kit."**_ The Kyuubi corrected. _**"Biiig difference."**_

"A coup is when you overthrow the government from the inside. Violently." Sarutobi told the two boys, one of them already knowing the meaning. "To attack the village from within, assassinating the government heads and replacing them with your own people. As you can imagine, we couldn't let this happen."

"So why Itachi?" Sasuke asked.

"We couldn't openly destroy the clan." Sarutobi explained. "That would lead to civil war, since some proud fool like Hiashi Hyuuga would fear for his own life and carry out the same plan." He looked into the young boys eyes. "The strongest of the clan exterminating the weak was a perfect cover for the operation."

"So why am I still alive?"

"Because your brother loved you and begged for your life." Sarutobi said. "He made you hate him to give you the will to live on, and killing him became a drive for you to grow strong. He wants you to grow strong so Danzo doesn't try to kill you once I'm out of the way."

"Or make you join Root." Naruto added with a shudder. He remembered the week he spent there well, and if the right ANBU hadn't found him early enough, he'd still be there to this day.

Thankfully, that was before the tongue seals, but the thought of enslavement still made Naruto shudder. "So, how are we in any position from stopping Danzo from getting what he wants now that he's Hokage?" Naruto asked. "In fact, who the hell let him _be_ Hokage?"

"The council, who else?" Sarutobi asked.

"No, that's a good point." Sasuke said. "We're at a time of peace, and Danzo's an absolute war-mongerer. He's obviously gonna declare war on someone, so who'd be thick enough to let him have the hat?"

"Know what I think?" Naruto asked.

"Don't care." Sasuke replied. "What does the Kyuubi think?"

"Same thing I do." Naruto told him.

"That worries me." Sasuke sighed. "What is it?"

Naruto turned to Sarutobi. "Old man, did any of the Uchiha's Sharingan give them mind-control powers?"

"Shisui Uchiha." Sasuke answered. "He was Itachi's best friend, came over a lot."

"Could he have made the council choose which candidate to vote in?" Naruto asked.

"Easily." Sasuke nodded. "You thinking Danzo has a Sharingan under his bandages?"

"Sharingan eyes can be transplanted after the host dies, so long as they were active when they died." Naruto reminded his friend, unaware that he was leaving the third out of their conversation. "I wouldn't put it past this village to have a drawer full of Sharingan."

"If we do, I don't know about it." Sarutobi told the two lads. "So, what're you going to do about it?"

Naruto thought for a moment. "Knowing Sasuke, he wants revenge…"

"Not particularly." Sasuke sighed.

Naruto almost broke his neck in shock. Even the third's jaw had met the bed sheets.

"My family were in the wrong." Sasuke pointed out. "All I'm really concerned with is finding my brother and stopping any psycho that wants to kill me, which may or may not include Danzo."

"Danzo may want me killed, and I want answers from him too." Naruto told Sasuke once he pulled himself together. "We can't tell the girls about this though."

Sasuke nodded. "They'll want in on this, and if things go south then…"

"If Temari gets caught, Danzo will publish it as a declaration of war from Suna, who suffered from the battle worse than we did, and if Haku's involved, it'll get interpreted as an elaborate assassination from the mist."

"Sakura would probably get herself killed, since she can only keep up to us when asleep." Sasuke joked lamely.

"Set our affairs in order, go tonight?" Naruto suggested.

"Don't do this boys." Sarutobi warned. "You've got your whole lives ahead of you."

"Don't worry Old Man." Naruto said with a smile as he stood up from the bed and faced the third, slipping a gap in his bandages to reveal his demonic eye. "In a few seconds, you won't remember this conversation ever happened…"

* * *

"So, explain to me why you two are plotting to overthrow the current head of one of the most powerful ninja villages in the world?" Shikamaru asked the two from the shadows as they left the hospital.

Naruto stopped dead. "I don't know what you're talking about." Sasuke lied.

"I don't need either of your eye tricks to know you're lying." Shikamaru told them. "Besides, I can see from shadows."

"I don't think he's lying." Naruto sighed, turning around as darkness spread under their feet. "So, you're kidnapping us to your house?" He asked as he started sinking into the blackness beneath.

* * *

"It's a pretty decent trick, but I need to place Chakra anchors at the return point for it to work." Shikamaru bragged, walking to the door of his bedroom as Naruto and Sasuke sat down. "DAD!!" He shouted.

Sasuke drew a kunai but a hand on his wrist and a headshake from Naruto told Sasuke that there was no need to panic. "Let me guess, this'll work better for us?"

"A good strategist will help." Shikamaru told the two boys, moving to sit down on the floor with them. "Two good strategists will help you better."

Shikaku Nara walked into the room and looked at the boys before sighing. "You're planning a coup aren't you?" He groaned.

"How the hell did you work that out?" Sasuke asked as Shikaku walked over to the bed.

"One, Danzo's already tried to recruit Naruto into ROOT, something Naruto is very against." Shikaku answered, slumping onto his son's bed. "Second, can you imagine an Uchiha with both the Sharingan and Haku's bloodline?"

Naruto scowled. "Sasuke and Haku would be used as breeding stock?" He snarled.

"_**You're getting quicker on the uptake Kit."**_

"Plan." Naruto stated. "Now."

* * *

Over the next few hours, the five of them worked together to develop various plans and back-up plans for Naruto and Sasuke, including safeties in for the likely situation of the boys having to flee the country.

"The best hiding place for you to go would be the Wave." Shikaku stated. "Because that's the first place Danzo would think of. He's the kind of person to ignore the obvious, so you'll have three years refuge in there easily."

Naruto nodded. "In that case, I'll need you to stop Temari and Haku from following us." He told Shikamaru.

Shikamaru paled.

"And Sakura too." Sasuke pointed out. "None of them deserve a life on the run."

Shikamaru closed his eyes and fell into his nightmares. It was his happy place.

* * *

That afternoon, Sasuke sent a message to the Uzumaki household, telling everyone that he and Naruto would be out late helping sort through the Uchiha estate all night, and that they should wait for them.

When Haku turned up with Sakura to see the two boys shifting through documents, they hung around for a few hours until Temari told them to leave them to it, and that they'd see them in the morning.

Once it got dark, however, Sasuke opened the armoury. The two boys donned the black costumes and masks which covered their mouths and noses, much like Kakashi's mask would.

However, the shoulder plates, the gauntlets, the greaves, and the shortswords showed that this was not the armour of an ANBU.

These two were going to war.

* * *

Naruto didn't bother hiding his demonic eye that night, and Sasuke bore both his two-tailed Sharingan, which showed something unusual.

"Sasuke, why is your Sharingan purple?"

"I have no idea, but focus on the task at hand." Sasuke told his partner in crime, blinking angrily as they ran through the alleys of Konoha. The rooftops were covered by ANBU patrols, so the two boys ran towards the tower of the Hokage on foot.

"Halt." One ANBU Jonin ordered. "Identify yourselves."

Naruto glanced back at him, knocking him out instantly with his eye.

"And I'm sure every ANBU in the city felt that chakra spike." Sasuke groaned. "Let's move."

* * *

By the time they reached the tower, the ANBU were on full alert, when Sasuke made some seals and created two corpses that matched their description.

"Nice sand Jutsu." Naruto complimented, pulling out the climbing claws and passing them to Sasuke.

Sasuke de-activated his Sharingan and slipped the claws onto his wrist. "Climbing without chakra… sensei would be so ashamed."

Naruto chuckled, then began to ascend the tower while concealing his chakra.

* * *

The two boys found Danzo in his office, sitting behind his desk smugly. "Good evening." He said, turning in his chair to face the two boys. "Have you come to kill me?"

"Perhaps." Naruto said, walking further into the room while Sasuke closed the door. "We're about to decide that."

"Why did you order Itachi to slaughter my clan?" Sasuke demanded. "I understand the need to prevent war, but why the hell should a ninja have to kill his own family?"

"A true shinobi should be prepared to make any sacrifice." Danzo scoffed.

"_Answer me._" Asked Sasuke's blade against Danzo's throat.

"_**He's got Sharingan, Kit."**_

"So you even stole from their corpses for your own greed…" Sasuke snarled, ripping open the bandages covering Shisui's Sharingan.

Danzo chuckled. "I have more." He stated. "But I'm sure that you're aware what Shisui's Sharingan is capable off…"

He was cut off by a burst of chakra from Sasuke's eyes. "Never try to beat an Uchiha's Sharingan, faker." Sasuke warned.

Naruto stepped forward, both eyes flaring red. "That Sharingan lets you use mind-control, is that how you became Hokage?"

"I was the obvious candidate." Danzo chuckled. "A little persuasion didn't hurt."

"I see…" Naruto nodded, then checking on Sasuke, who looked sick. "What?"

"His shoulder…" Sasuke said in horror. "It's got a face…"

Danzo laughed as he tore the cloth covering his right arm, revealing the large metal armour. "You boys have no idea… you simply thought I became Hokage merely due to political power!?" The bolts began to undo themselves. "Oh no. No, not at all."

"So you stole a big pile of Sharingan and shoved them into your arm." Sasuke spat, his anger growing by the second. "Naruto, I say we kill him now before he opens his tin can."

"I agree." Naruto stated, drawing the Kitsune from his back.

Twelve blades met the boys throats, as twelve soldiers from ROOT burst from their hiding places to protect their master.

"_**Well, this is a fine predicament you've gotten yourself into."**_

"This conversation has been recorded and sent to the torture and interrogation unit." Danzo told the two boys, covering his arm once more. "Your choice is to kneel before me and join ROOT, or die here has traitors to Konoha."

"There is also the option of killing every body in this room." Naruto shrugged, looking at his opponents. Heartless killers, every single one of them. No hesitation in any of their eyes; they lived to obey.

Danzo sighed. "It is a shame to let such useful breeding stock go to waste, but your corpses will still be most useful." Danzo clicked his fingers. "Kill them."

A thousand birds screeched and a tornado roared as the two boys cut down the ROOT ninjas, turning on Danzo as more burst from the walls, blade swinging for Naruto's skull.

Naruto leant back as the blade slashed a gash through his hitae-ate, a dishonour Naruto replied with by slicing through the soldiers throat. He then turned to ram a burning Rasengan into another ninja's torso, before slashing behind him to take down another ninja.

Sasuke was spinning rapidly with his two short blades, one held in reverse grip, both singing as he ran the Chidori down them: training with Shadow clones was a very worthwhile effort, he noted.

CLANG

The two boys were distracted as the first segment of Danzo's armour hit the floor, revealing a Sharingan embedded in the old man's forearm.

"_**He's got plenty more where that came from Kit."**_

Naruto pulled himself back together in time to block the sword that was about to impale his ear and responded by ramming a fist through his attackers ribcage.

* * *

"Something's not right." Sakura commented in the hot spring in Naruto's garden.

"Yeah…" Haku sighed. "It's just too quiet without Naruto-sama…"

Sakura shook her head. "No, that's not it." She said. "It's that owl."

"What of it?" Temari asked as Haku started blowing bubbles in the water.

"It's been hooting since we got in here." Sakura pointed out.

"I'm sure it'll move soon enough." Temari sighed, sinking herself deeper into the water.

"That's just it." Sakura insisted. "Owls are nocturnal, they should be flying around and hunting right now, not perched and hooting for fifteen minutes."

"I don't know much about Konoha wildlife-HEY!" Temari shouted, pushing Haku off her. "Personal space girl!"

"Rrrgh shut up and listen!" Sakura shouted as they fought, standing up as water sloshed down her body. "Owls don't stay still hooting for fifteen minutes at this time of night! It doesn't happen!"

Haku suspended her current attack of Temari's boobs and stood to her feet. "You think we're being spied on?"

"Naruto wouldn't do something like that." Temari said, pushing herself into a cross-legged position in the water.

"He is a pervert you know." Sakura pointed out.

"And his eye-thing probably has x-ray vision." Temari countered. "If he wanted to see us naked, he probably already has."

"I jump him in the shower every other day." Haku added. "And Sasuke doesn't have the right kind of balls for peeping solo."

"What do you mean, _right_ kind of balls?" Sakura leered.

"Want someone to get killed, he's your guy." Haku shrugged. "Plenty of balls in the vengeance department, but he's got no… whatchacall it?"

"Libido?" Temari suggested.

"Nah, he's got that, he's just got higher priorities." Haku shrugged. "Point is, if it's not those two, then we've got problems."

Shikamaru gulped behind his tree as Sakura reached for her clothes. He'd sealed the forest around the house off from the outside world, but now he was trapped with three murderous kunoichi.

He hoped like hell nothing went wrong on Naruto's end.

* * *

As the final seal on Danzo's armour came loose, Naruto cut down the nineteenth ROOT soldier of the night and turned to face the Hokage.

"There actually is a face on his shoulder…" He gasped as Danzo slammed his right arm into the desk, launching several beams of wood at Naruto and Sasuke.

_His arm was covered in Sharingan._

"ABORT!" Naruto shouted, leaping out of the wood's path and running for the window as Danzo launched several bursts of wind at him, once slicing his hitae-ate for a second time.

"We're just gonna let him live!?" Sasuke shouted as Naruto ran past him towards the window.

"JUST RUN!!"

Sasuke ducked under Danzo's next wind attack and ran towards the hole in the wall, jumping down with Naruto, turning in the air to activate the Hawk summoning technique to blast through Danzo's next wind attack.

"GAMABUNTA!" Naruto summoned, and the two boys landed on the giant toad's head.

"Oi, what're you summoning me for?" Gamabunta groaned with a yawn. "I was asleep."

"WE NEED TO MOVE!" Naruto shouted. "GO!"

"Not a chance." Gamabunta yawned before disappearing in a cloud of smoke.

"DAMMIT TOAD!!" Naruto shouted, before landing on the concrete below.

He crawled out of the crater and popped his shoulder back in. _'Kyube, I could really use some healing right now.'_

"_**On it Kit. I'm fine, thanks for asking."**_

Naruto sighed as his ribs began to reconnect to each other and Sasuke landed gracefully next to him. "We've got problems." Sasuke warned his partner.

"Well don't we always." Naruto sighed, standing to his feet while clutching his ribcage as the smoke cleared.

"We got you this time, demon fox." One of the dozens of ANBU ninja sneered at him. "Knew we'd catch you one day."

"HEY!" Kakashi shouted, leaping in front of his students. "What the hell is going on here!?"

"Naruto Uzumaki and Sasuke Uchiha are hereby guilty of high treason against our lord Hokage!"

Kakashi paled. "Hey, they aren't serious… right?" He asked, already knowing the answer. "You two aren't actually that stupid… are you?"

"Sorry sensei." Naruto smiled. "We are that stupid."

"STEP ASIDE KAKASHI!!"

"You idiots…" Kakashi gasped, blinking a tear. "Why…"

"DO IT NOW!"

"Sorry for disappointing you sensei." Sasuke smiled. "But this was something we had to do."

"We don't regret it." Naruto smiled. "And we knew this would happen."

"Don't drag yourself with us." Sasuke told his teacher. "We want something to come back to."

Kakashi frowned. _'Come back to… what..?'_

He caught Naruto's smirk and got the message. "Don't let me down." Kakashi pleaded, turning his back on his students, despite every fibre of his being screaming at him to run with them.

"KILL THEM!!"

Hellfire consumed the plaza and two boys burst from the flames, running as fast as their legs could carry them.

_I can still remember the words and what they meant_

ANBU leapt out of the fire and gave chase, spreading out amongst the rooftops to prevent their escape.

_As we etched them with our fingers in years of wet cement_

Sasuke made some seals and slammed the ground, summoning Susano-o to slash above the rooftops.

_Days blurred into each other though everything seemed clear_

The slash was too high, achieving nothing but scaring the ANBU stiff for a few seconds before they chased again.

_We cruised along at half speed but then we shifted gears_

Naruto skidded to a halt and threw a Rasengan down the street.

_We ran like vampires from a thousand burning suns_

Stone flags were torn from the street in the ball's wake, causing havoc and waking everyone up.

_But even then we should have stayed_

Naruto and Sasuke ran faster as more Ninja rushed out of their houses to pursue the two.

_But we ran away - now all my friends are gone_

They both created Shadow Clones to hold back their pursuers.

_Maybe we've outgrown all the things we once loved_

Great dogs from the Inuzuka clan bounded over the clones and chased the pair.

_Run away - but what are we running from?_

Naruto summoned the great fox to roar them into submission as he ran faster

_A show of hands from those in this audience of one_

A swarm of insects rushed from the alleys to block their path.

_Where have they gone?_

Sasuke blasted a ball of fire to open a new path through the insects, and the two ran for the hills.

* * *

_Identities assume us as nine and five add up_

Shikamaru defended himself against the waves of wind and ice coming from both sides with his Shadows.

_Synchronizing watches to the seconds that we lost_

And got knocked back by a powered punch from Sakura.

_And I looked up and saw you - I know that you saw me_

The darkness surrounding the house fell and the girls looked towards the city.

_We froze but for a moment in empathy_

It was ablaze.

* * *

_I brought down the sky for you but all you did was shrug_

"_**Kit, you okay?"**_

_You gave my emptiness a name_

"I'm fine." Naruto lied, tearing his eyes away from the Hokage monument. "Let's go."

* * *

_And you ran away - now all my friends are gone_

Danzo destroyed the recording and replaced the armour on his arm as Iruka burst into the office.

_Maybe we've outgrown all the things we once loved_

"Have this proclamation declared everywhere in the fire country." Danzo told him, handing him a document.

_Run away - but what are we running from?_

"Naruto Uzumaki and Sasuke Uchiha are now B-rank missing-nins guilty of high treason." Iruka read in disbelief. "What!?"

_A show of hands from those in this audience of one_

Danzo glared at him. "Have those in his house taken in for questioning too."

_Where have they gone?_

Iruka clenched his teeth and the paper in his fist. "…Fine." He snarled in anger. "Lord. Hokage."

* * *

_We're all okay until the day we're not_

Naruto and Sasuke stopped for a rest once they reached a clearing.

_The surface shines while the inside rots_

"Hey, the sun's starting to rise." Sasuke commented, pointing to the east.

_We raced the sunset and we almost won_

Naruto looked, and saw three figures chasing after them.

_We slammed the brakes but the wheels went on_

"How dare you even _THINK_ of leaving us behind like that!?" Temari shouted, punching Naruto in the jaw as Haku and Sakura caught up to them. "Honestly…"

* * *

_We ran away - now all my friends are gone_

_Maybe we've outgrown all the things that we once loved_

_Run away - but what are we running from?_

_A show of hands from those in this audience of one_

_Where have they gone?_

* * *

Sasuke looked over Naruto and the three girls as they slept, recovering from last night's escape.

Two horizontal lines had been slashed through the leaf symbol of Konoha on Naruto's hitae-ate, almost like an equals sign.

Equality. The one thing neither Naruto or Sasuke were ever offered.

Sasuke looked at his own headband. Cutting through the plate was a symbol of defecting from your city and becoming a Missing-nin.

'_I'm not betraying Konoha.'_ Sasuke thought. _'I'm betraying the traitors in Konoha.'_

He took up Naruto's short sword, the Despair, and made two deep scratches into his Hitae-ate with a smile.

* * *

**END OF PART ONE**

* * *

_That song there was 'Audience Of One', by Rise Against. The thing that really sealed the deal was that it let us make that scene of Naruto saying goodbye to the Hokage monument, something both me and RWC have been looking forward to doing. _

_Hopefully, Part Two will start sooner than it took to do this chapter, but that's all up to RWC. I for one am damned happy to be working on this thing again._

**I have yet to decide if Part Two will be a seperate story or added to this... likley added to this...**_  
_


	27. Part 2: We ran away

And now, we start with part two. Heyoh!

And just a warning, one of the characters in this chapter likes to swear. _A lot._

**After concideration (Read:Lazyness) i decided to add part two into the same story, this is where the story really takes a turn :)  
**

**An on the Manga, Kushina is in the seal now O.o I call shenanigans**

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

**ONE EYE OF THE DEMON**

**Chapter 27**

_**We Ran Away**_

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

It had been two days since Naruto and Sasuke had fled Konoha village, having been declared Missing-Nin and Traitors to the village.

In their house, however, was a gathering of people.

Shikamaru sat on a chair with a bottle of Sake in hand looking rather comfy, his dad along with the other two members of the original Ino-Shika-Chou team were also in the room with bottles of Sake.

The Third Hokage himself was sat in a seat of honour with his own bottle of Sake, three people who were less sure of themselves but none the less with bottles of Sake were Asuma Sarutobi, Ino Yamanaka and Chouji Akimichi.

Asuma was the first of these three to work out what was going on, "So this is Naruto's inner circle then…"

Ino Gaped. "Naruto's inner circle?" she asked

Shikamaru chuckled, "Naruto isn't the real traitor here, Danzo is."

Chouji gulped. "So what do we do?" he asked

The retired Third Hokage grinned, "We plan and wait until Naruto, the true fifth Hokage is ready."

And a new group of conspirators was born.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Naruto and Sasuke were busy putting out the campfire the next morning when they were approached by a young man in a white shirt and tie. "Good morning." He introduced himself, ignoring the two people behind him.

One of the two was a woman in a loose black top and denim short-shorts. Her right shoulder was covered in tribal tattoos, and two hand guns were slung over her shoulders as she smoked a cigarette.

The other person gave of a completely different impression. He was dressed in a black cleric's robe, his face emotionless and calm, the complete opposite to the loose, irritated and annoyed feel that the woman gave off.

The man at the front sat down at on a log and smiled at Naruto and Sasuke. "Naruto and Sasuke, right?" he asked, offering his hand for them to shake. "My name's Rock, good to meet you."

Naruto and Sasuke stood to their feet and readied their weapons. "I take it that the three young ladies are at the natural hot-spring half a mile into the forest?" Rock asked, ignoring their threatening behaviour as the woman drew two guns and pointed them. "Revy, please, calm down."

"What do you want?" Sasuke asked, fingering the sword on the scabbard on his back.

"I just wanted to know how you were doing." Rock asked the two boys, ignoring the fact that the woman behind him still hadn't lowered her weapons. "And to ask you which philosophy you prefer." He pulled a cigarette from his pocket and put it in his mouth, leaning into the campfire to light it.

"'Equivalent Exchange'" Rock asked the two boys. "Or 'Take what you can, give nothing back'?"

'_**They're enemies Kit.'**_ Kyuubi confirmed. _**'Very dangerous ones, especially this one in the front.'**_

'_I don't sense that much Chakra coming from him.'_ Naruto told Kyube. _'The other two are around Jonin level, but this guy?'_

'_**You don't need Chakra to be a threat Kit.'**_ Kyuubi warned him. _**'This man could level a city with mere words.'**_

Naruto drew the Kitsune. "I think that's rather none of your business." He warned.

"Rock." The woman warned. "These fuckers are fucking asking for it."

The man in the shirt sighed, standing to his feet. "I can tell your answer." He told the two boys, turning and walking into the forest. "Revy, Preston, I leave it to you."

"Fuck yeah." Revy grinned as the cloaked man slid two handguns from his sleeves into his hands.

But not before Sasuke grabbed hold of Revy and tossed her into the forest. "DAAAAAAMIIIIIT COCKSUCKAAAAAHHHSS!" she shouted, firing at the dark-haired ninja.

Naruto charged at the cloaked man with his blade, slashing powerfully only for the blade to be blocked by his gun as Preston fired at Sasuke. Sasuke rolled to the side, launching a fireball at his ally and his enemy.

Naruto dropped the blade and summoned five shadow clones to hold the gunman down as they were consumed by the flames, but the man twisted to the side and escaped with light burns before planting a bullet into the forehead of each clone. He jumped into the air, firing shots as Naruto summoned the blade into his hand and charged alongside Sasuke, who was running a Chidori down his blade.

The gunman landed onto the two swords, firing a shot into each boys shoulder before leaping back into the air as his boots caught fire. He stamped them into the earth and fired more shots which the two boys blocked as they healed their wounds, Naruto recovering much faster than Sasuke.

"Dammit…" Sasuke snarled, taking cover behind a tree so he could bandage his wound with the black cloth in his hand. _'Wait, isn't this the shirt that woman was wearing?'_

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Revy landed in the hot water with a splash as the three women leapt out of the water, Temari to hurriedly slip into her jacket and grab her fan, Haku to grab her enormous blade and face her foe, and Sakura to shove a shirt on and start to ram her legs into her shorts, stopping only to catch two bullets between her fingers.

The gunwoman stepped out of the water angrily, aware of the fact that she was topless and frankly not giving a damn. "Shit." She swore, pulling a sodden box out of her pocket and tossing it aside. "Damn smokes too fucking sodden."

Sakura got to her feet and got ready to fight alongside the other two kunoichi. "Ah, fuck it." Revy swore, loading another clip into each of her guns. "Let's go ladies."

Haku immediately trapped the gunwoman in her mirrors of ice. Revy began firing at the indestructible mirrors as Temari ran around the perimeter of the cage, launching powerful wind attacks at her opponent, who swiftly dodged each strike and returned fire.

Sakura stood on the side, feeling quite useless as Haku burst from the mirrors, launching needles and attacking with her blade as Revy dodged and fired at Temari.

Of course, once Temari got hit by a bullet in the shoulder, then Sakura found herself and her medical jutsu _very_ useful.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Naruto and the injured Sasuke fought against the silent cleric, who evaded their attacks with ease as he fired. Were it not for Sasuke's Sharingan and Naruto's hyper healing, the battle would have been lost long ago.

"Dammit…" Sasuke snarled as he launched another fireball. "Does this guy have the Sharingan too or something?"

"It's Gun Kata." Naruto explained as he hid behind a mob of clones. "A martial art where you memorize the standard formations and movements used in battles in order to predict where your opponent is going to be next, dodge their attacks and shoot their face off."

"Lovely." Sasuke growled, amping up his Sharingan another notch to increase his evasion. "I bet that using an army of clones would just make things easier for him, wouldn't it."

"Most likely." Naruto sighed, dodging another bullet. "And if he runs outta ammo, he can just use his sword."

"Guns." Sasuke spat, dodging the next one. "Evil weapons, aren't they?"

"Gives a normal person the power to kill a ninja." Naruto agreed as he charged up a fireball. "Then you get guys like him."

"Just not fair…" Sasuke moaned, shaking his head as he switched places with a log. "Alright, back to attacking." He decided, making the hand-seals for the Chidori.

Naruto turned his fireball into a Rasengan. "Let's do this."

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Revy was not angry. She was beyond angry.

She was fucking _pissed._

Her custom Cutlass pistols were fucking waterlogged, she was fucking out of fucking ammo, the fucking psycho ninja bitch had stolen her fucking pants, and these three fucking whores were fucking playing with her.

Fuck.

Not that she could do much as it was. These fucking ice mirrors made in next to impossible to fucking do anything. The fucking cowards kept hiding behind them and throwing these fucking needles into her.

"Shit Rock…" she sighed, sitting into the hot water cross legged and folding her arms. It was time to calm down and think dammit.

…

"Fuck it." She decided, bringing her arms together and performing the summoning seal.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

A blue haired young man in the trees slapped his face. This was Revy all over.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Haku went flying into the trees as the mirror she was occupying was shattered.

"Ya know, I really don't like bragging about weapons." Revy declared as the cage of ice mirrors collapsed around her. "As long as it hits the target, normally any fucking gun would do the job, but I feel like explaining how much shit ya'll in."

She stepped out of the mist, completely covered in leather straps carrying guns, ammunition, grenades and more. She had a fresh cigarette between her teeth and a massive red… cannon in her arms. "This fucker is a Boltgun." She explained to the three kunoichi. "Rapid fire, armour piercing, explosive rounds the size of your fucking fist. This fucking machine is too damned heavy to fucking aim, but since you bitches are so fast, it's not like I had that advantage in the first place, so yippie kay yay, mother fuckers."

Revy fired the behemoth, missing everyone completely and obliterating four trees with the metal slug. In exploded, destroying two dozen more trees and shredding Haku and Sakura's flesh with the wood and metal pieces of shrapnel.

"Fuck yeah." Revy grinned, setting the Boltgun to Auto.

**DAKKADAKKADAKKA**

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

'_**That doesn't sound good.'**_ Kyube pointed out as Naruto ducked under a bullet and slashed upwards. _**'Awesome, but extremely not very good Kit.'**_

"You don't…" Naruto grunted as he punched Preston in the face wildly. "SAY?"

Sasuke leapt in to stab down on the cleric, pinning his ribcage to the ground with his sword. "Finally." Sasuke grunted, kicking the mans guns away from his hands and stepping back. "What do we do with this one?"

Naruto didn't get to answer, as John Preston pulled the sword out of his own ribcage and rolled towards Naruto, getting to his feet and swinging the blade into Naruto's own. The blonde blocked, swooping down into an uppercut as Preston kicked up into a backflip, striking Naruto on the chin and slamming Sasuke's face into the ground before drawing two more guns from his pocket as the two boys exploded into logs.

He turned around and began firing rapidly at the army of clones rushing out of the forest, not allowing a single one to get within twelve feet of him.

Then came the four-tailed demon fox. "**Hello human.**" It sneered, before exploding into orange flame as a metal bolt tunnelled into its brain and exploded.

"Oh come on!" Naruto shouted from the trees. "That's not even fair!"

'_**You think you got it bad kit?'**_ Kyube growled. _**'It was MY head it exploded if I remember right. Oh wait, how can I remember right? MY HEAD GOT BLOWN APART DUMBASS!'**_

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Revy laughed like a goddess of destruction in the middle of a bloodbath.

If her targets weren't too terrified to do anything other than dodge, there would be a whole lot more blood.

As it was, even Haku was curled up in a terrified ball, wearing nothing but a stolen pair of denim hot pants and a massive sword on her back. Temari was keeping her alive by following Sakura as she fearfully dodged the massive shells and the following clouds of shrapnel.

Eventually, however, enough was enough.

"Hold this." Temari told Sakura, handing her Haku as she widened her fan, charging it with wind chakra and launching a furious maelstrom at the woman with the guns.

Revy blocked with her bolter, destroying the weapon, but Revy simply drew two handguns and began firing at the fan user. Temari blocked the bullets with her iron fan, charging up a Rasengan like Jiraiya had taught her with her other hand.

She flipped the fan back at the last second and rammed the ball of chakra into Revy's torso, but she simply grinned and pressed the gun to Temari's forehead.

The blonde kunoichi dodged quickly, the bullet creating a hole in her hair as she stole a spare pistol from Revy's straps and aimed for her as she fell.

Revy quickly moved her gun to fire again, the muzzles brushing against each other as two fingers pressed two triggers.

The bullets collided, destroying the two guns and the hands that were holding each one.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Preston tossed his guns aside, having run out of ammunition, and drew two katana from his trenchcoat, readying himself in a stance as he bled.

"Finally." Naruto grunted, panting for breath as he glanced at Sasuke. "You okay?"

"Yeah." Sasuke lied. He didn't have as much chakra stores as the inexhaustible Naruto, nor did he have his demonic healing, so the Uchiha was approaching his limit. "Yeah, I'm fine." He repeated.

Naruto glanced at the sword in Sasuke's shaking hand. He could barely hold the weapon.

Naruto merely nodded, swishing the Kitsune in his grip. "Let's take this fool down then." He decided, charging alongside his fellow missing-nin.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Fucking BITCH!" Revy shouted, aiming her other gun at Temari.

"Revy, stop." Rock told her, taking a puff from his cigarette. "Order came to pull out."

"Ya gotta be fucking with me." Revy snarled. "Don't give me this shit, cause I'm ending this here."

"We don't get paid if they die." Rock reminded her, Temari glancing at the two of them in panic. "Your choice here is if you want a career and your hand healing, or if you want to settle a score you can settle later." He flicked his cigarette into the remains of the hot spring as he approached the two women. "And don't say that you need to kill her now because that's what you said about Roberta."

"Rock, if it was anyone other than you, I'd have put a bullet through both of your skulls already." Revy warned, turning the gun on the man. "So fucking stay out of this."

"No." Rock told her. "We're pulling out. NOW."

Revy snarled, then sighed. "Fuck it." She groaned, then fired.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

"Rebel rebel, you've torn ya dress!" the two drunkards sang as staggered into the battle field between the cleric and the two ninjas. "Rebel rebel, yer face iza mess!"

One was a pirate, the other had dark skin and far too much jewellery. "Rebel rebel, da nananana! HOT TRAMP! I luvya sho!"

"Er…" Naruto managed.

"SHADDUP FOO!" the black man shouted, throwing a bottle at him as the pirate threw another bottle at a tree.

"Why is the rum always gone…" he sighed.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Rock didn't even flinch as the bullet grazed his cheek. "I'm not backing down Revy." He repeated with quiet anger. "Stop this. _Now._"

"I KNOW DAMMIT!" the gunwoman shouted, throwing her gun into the dirt and stepping over Temari. "Fucking shit, you know how much I hate you, right?" she snapped, walking over to the man.

The man didn't say a word, simply walking into the forest with the woman.

Eventually, Temari sat upright as Sakura and Haku walked over to her.

"What the fuck?"

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

Those were Naruto's and Sasuke's sentiments exactly once they regrouped. It had been a confusing morning.

Of course, with Naruto and Sakura being the only members of the team with anything resembling chakra left in them, they only managed to carry the rest of the team a few miles away from the geological carnage before they themselves had to take a rest.

Sakura began treating everyone's wounds as Naruto set up a new camp with the aid of some shadow clones and some summoning scrolls. It was all agreed that an early night was in order.

Of course, that left Naruto being the only one capable of guard duty after that mayhem, so he got time to think while everyone rested.

And by think, he meant talk to the Kyuubi.

Specifically, about the merits of 'Equivalent Exchange' and 'Take What You Can, Give Nothing Back.'

'_**Equivalent Exchange is the higher law Kit.'**_ Kyube explained. _**'You give and you take. You kill and you give birth. This is how the world keeps turning. Only one type of person would try to break that holy law with something as superficial as 'Take What You Can, Give Nothing Back'.'**_

"Pirates, right?" Naruto thought.

'_**Most thieves are smart.'**_ Kyuubi continued. _**'You gotta leave something, never rob the place dry, or they'll leave, and you won't be able to steal from them tomorrow. In return, you defend the place in the shadows from thieves that would rob the place dry. It keeps the cycle moving, and the world turning.'**_

"Is there another way to interpret that though?" Naruto asked. "Take what you can, give nothing back… what about war?"

Kyube laughed. "What?" Naruto asked him.

'_**In the practical art of war, the best thing of all is to take the enemy's country whole and intact; to shatter and destroy it is not so good. So, too, it is better to recapture an army entire than to destroy it, to capture a regiment, a detachment or a company entire than to destroy them.'**_ Kyube laughed again. _**'Didn't you read Art Of War Kit?'**_

"It's on my list of things to read." Naruto replied with a sigh.

'_**Which you'll never get to read now that you're on the run.'**_ Kyube laughed again. _**'The point is, Kit, if you keep on taking, taking, taking and never giving back, then you'll be left sitting on a huge pile of gold while potatoes become the new currency and believe me when I say I've seen that happen before Kit. It was hilarious.'**_

Naruto thought about it.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

The next morning was uneventful.

Temari fell asleep in Naruto's tent when Sasuke took over the watch, so Haku woke them up with a double crotch-grab before getting dragged outside by Sakura for another lecture about the importance of clothing. Haku reasoned that she was, in fact, dressed, but Sakura insisted that boots, gauntlets and denim shorts did not count as proper attire for a kunoichi, despite evidence provided by the magazine Sasuke was browsing.

In fact, the most interesting thing that happened that morning was that Naruto discovered a new love for breakfast cereal.

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

**-}+{-**

[}~~~~~~~~~| |~~~~~~~~~{]

When you live like Naruto, those kind of things begin to become normal.

**So who can name all the Cameo characters, cake if you can :)**


	28. The Imaginary King

Man... Chapter 28... when I started this I never thought that I would get past chapter 1.

**Who likes the music from Touhou? I do. I especially recommend 'No Life Queen'. Lunardragon2607 on youtube made an excellent extended version that would be especially nice to listen to while reading this chapter.**

**The One Eye of the Demon**

**Chapter 28**

**The Imaginary King**

The blue haired youth watched as the blond haired silver eyed woman stepped from the tree line. The silver outfit she wore was almost like a second skin and the claymore strapped to her back was a silent statement to her strength.

The blue haired youth smiled, "Did everything go to plan, Clare?" he asked.

The woman nodded, "Exactly to plan." She confirmed. "All the ROOT agents have been eliminated."

The youth nodded, "Should buy us a few years while Danzo recovers." He said. "Hopefully Naruto can do his job right."

* * *

Naruto stared at the figures on the road ahead.

"Sasuke?" Naruto asked, raising a hand to stop the travelling party. "I think we found your brother."

Sasuke head snapped round so fast it became a blur.

_**'Well that had to hurt.'**_

Sasuke leapt from the treeline and stood in the middle of the road, then began to walk towards his brother.

"Itachi." Sasuke announced as he walked slowly.

The elder Uchiha glanced at his younger brother, then returned his gaze to the road. "You are weak." Itachi said. "Why? Because you lack hatred."

"I know about the coup Itachi." Sasuke announced, stopping Itachi in his tracks. "I know why you had to do it."

The normally stoic Akatsuki slowly turned to his brother, hope and horror betraying the mask.

Sasuke raised his head, showing two blue Sharingan.

"I forgive you."

* * *

"Didn't see that coming." Haku announced as Sasuke flashstepped to embrace his older brother.

"I was honestly expecting there to be an expositional battle while they discussed their feelings." Temari agreed.

"Why can't I know normal people like everyone else?" Sakura asked as Itachi slumped to his knees, sobbing on his younger brother's shoulder.

"We've got a problem." Naruto said, drawing the Kitsune. "Fish-boy looks pissed."

'_**Which reminds me kit.'**_ Kyube said. _**'I'm hungry.'**_

_**

* * *

**_

"How touching." Kisame smirked, his bandaged blade resting against Sasuke's and Itachi's necks. "I suppose now you intend to abandon our mission and care for your brother again, you double agent."

Sasuke's eyes widened. "What?"

Kisame laughed. "You think we didn't know?" he asked. "We all knew you were sending information out to Konoha. Why do you think we never sent _you_ after the Jinchurriki? Why do you think they sent the guy who absorbs chakra, is immune to your Sharingan _and_ your Amaterasu, AND can send information faster than Zetsu as your partner?"

Sasuke blinked, "He's immune to the Sharingan and Amaterasu?"

"He is mentally strong beyond my ability to break and... have you ever tried to set a fish on fire?"

"Ah."

Itachi pushed his brother away. "Go back to your friends." Itachi said, rising and turning around. "We will discuss this later."

Kisame laughed as the bandages covering his blade withered away, the sword's mouth opening wide to show its teeth.

"I'm not presumptuous enough to think that this will be an easy fight." Kisame said as Sasuke backed off. "But you're a fool to think you can best me without your Sharingan."

Itachi glanced into the trees where Naruto's team was, then returned his focus to Kisame and made a cross-fingered seal.

The air exploded as twenty Shadow Clones appeared.

"You seem to have mistaken me for a one-trick pony." Itachi's clones said. "Allow me to correct this misconception."

Kisame laughed, swinging his blade around and flooding the plains. Clone after Clone was consumed by the water-based sharks summoned, but Itachi burst from the water, making seal after seal as Kisame rose from the water with his blade, like Poseidon rising from the depths with his trident.

The water was thrown into the air as the drowned clones exploded underneath it. Itachi charged at the off-balance Kisame with his sword, but Kisame blocked it with the Samehada, grinning as he summoned a shark from his mouth.

Itachi's body burst into crows as the shark tore his head off, and a giant of flames rose behind Kisame and launched a flaming bolt at the swordsman. Kisame laughed, blocking the attack with a wall of water as he dodged. "Using Susano-o so early?" he shouted. "Come on, you're better than that!"

_SNICKT_

"I know I am." Itachi whispered as Kisame coughed up blood. The genjutsu of the flaming giant faded as Kisame felt the blade in his ribcage, and he smiled despite the pain as he gripped the sword's edge, holding it tight as he span around and swung for his former partner with his weapon.

Itachi left his sword in Kisame's chest as he ducked, only to be knocked back by a knee to his chest. He rolled in the air and landed gracefully, grabbing a kunai and rising up to catch Kisame's sword blow.

Kisame laughed in the sheer ecstasy of the battle before a hand gripped his ankle and dragged him into the earth. "WHAT?"

"I told you to get back." Itachi told his brother. "I've got this."

"I don't care." Sasuke told Itachi as Kisame struggled against the Decapitation Technique. "We're on the run from Konoha, and we'd like to return to doing that as soon as we can."

Kisame roared, bursting from the ground in a jet of water. He leered at those below him as the ice began to rise up from the ground.

"Oh?" He asked as the ice approached him. "Is that Zabuza's brat?" he hopped above the geyser as water consumed it then stamped into it. "NOT ENOUGH!" he roared as the ice shattered.

A flaming tornado rose from the ground, consuming the ice and the water around Kisame as he descended. He looked down to see one Jinchurriki's sister and the current Junchurriki combining chakra to create the twisting inferno.

The shark-man laughed, hurling Samehada down at Naruto. The blade struck Naruto in the chest, throwing him out of the furnace as it began to consume his chakra.

Kisame landed, cricking his neck. He pulled Itachi's sword from his own chest and looked at his four opponents. Itachi and three brats.

'_Without Samehada eating my chakra,' _ he thought as the blazing twister died down_, 'this should be easy.'_

He made a seal, once more flooding the plains and summoning a dozen sharks to take care of the small fry. Haku and Temari rushed to rescue Naruto from the bubble of water as the two Uchiha readied themselves in the water.

Itachi readied his kunai as Sasuke activated the Chidori. He stabbed through shark after shark as the older brother rushed forward in the water to attack.

'_Fool.'_ Kisame laughed. _'He'll never get enough force in the water to hurt me.'_

This was when a blast of chakra tore the water bubble apart.

"WHAT?" Kisame roared, ducking under Itachi's swing and blocking his attack.

"Looks like your baby can't handle the concentrated chakra of a thousand jinchurriki." Naruto smirked, holding the withered husk of Samehada in his hand before burning it with his demonic eye.

Kisame roared, charging for the boy as Itachi blocked.

"This is _our_ battle." Itachi snarled. "No one is to interfere."

"You'd be dead without your little brother wiping your ass." Kisame sneered.

Itachi smiled pleasantly.

Then he exploded.

* * *

Anko raised her head.

"What is it?" Kakashi asked her.

"I just got the strangest feeling." She whispered. "Like… the strangest urge to shout Bitched at the top of my voice…"

* * *

Kisame struggled to his feet, wincing at the burns as the children around him released the transformation jutsu's and returned to their true forms.

_Itachi's clones._

"We were right here the whole time." Naruto laughed behind him. "Itachi's kicking your ass all on his own."

Kisame snarled, summoning a shark in his hand and driving it into Naruto's chest.

Naruto threw up blood, but melted into his true form.

Kisame paled as his victim's hand grabbed his wrist.

"Boom." The Itachi clone whispered.

* * *

"There it is again…" Anko grunted. "Gimme another drink."

* * *

"Clone Great Explosion technique." Itachi announced. "You've seen me use it so many times. A Shadow clone explodes like a bomb. Most ninja would see right through it, but if used in a combo, they never see it coming."

Kisame snarled as he struggled to his feet. "You've seen me use this technique many times, and yet it still works." Itachi explained, holding a kunai to Kisame's throat. "And that's why you'll always be second rate."

The swordsman snarled, letting rage overcome him as he tore past Itachi's arm and lunged for his throat before realising his mistake.

* * *

"FUCK!" Anko shouted. "WHERE'S MY DRINK?"

* * *

Kisame stood around the twelve remaining clones.

One of them was real.

One of them wouldn't explode when he touched them.

Which one?

Which one?

SLICE!

"You are weak." Itachi told Kisame as his head flew through the air. "Why? _Because you lack fear._"

* * *

"FUCK IT!" Anko shouted, standing on the bar. "BITCHED! There, HAPPY?"

* * *

"So, it's over." Sakura asked as Haku and Naruto worked on dismembering Kisame's corpse as a Hunter-nin would do.

"With him, at least." Itachi said, before turning to Sasuke. "Tell me everything. Starting with the colour of your Sharingan."

Sasuke smirked.

"The Sharingan is powered by your hate, especially after hurting someone you love." He reasoned. "So I guess something different happens if you forgive someone who hurt you."

Itachi nodded. "I envy your strength." He told his brother. "Now, tell me the situation."

* * *

Pein scowled momentarily.

This was not to plan.

* * *

Jiraiya sighed. "Things are changing, Tsunade."

The blonde looked over the table at her old teammate. "Now what would make an old pervert like you say that?"

"Naruto knows his father's old ambition." Jiraiya explained with a smirk, swirling the sake in his dish. "He has more will than any ninja I've ever seen and more importantly, a loyal group of friends following him." he sipped the alcohol. "If anyone can do this, Naruto can."

Tsunade sighed, shaking her head. "Damn kid…" she groaned. "I don't care who's kid he is or what he has inside him. I'm a pathetic mess if a child can destroy me without raising a finger." She chugged her bottle of sake. "I'm gonna kick his ass next time I see him."

Jiraiya laughed as a man in a red cloak approached the table. "Jiraiya and Tsunade of the Sannin?" he asked.

"Let me guess." Jiraiya said, placing his dish onto the table. "You're a messenger from Kami."

"My name is Auron." The man said. "And this is my associate, Jecht."

"Hey!" A bare-chested man with a beard waved.

"We'd like you to come with us." Auron continued.

Tsunade slammed her bottle against the table. "And if we refuse?" she asked, wiping her chin with her wrist.

The bare-chested man slammed a broadsword against the floor as Auron tightened his grip on the sword on his shoulder.

Jecht grinned.

Tsunade threw the table up and slammed Auron to the ground. Jiraiya tackled Jecht into a wall while making several seals with one hand and slamming his fingers into the man's chest.

Jecht coughed up black gunk, then collapsed into rising blue glass that consumed his body and eventually itself.

* * *

Zack fell to one knee, clutching his chest as Master Chief also collapsed.

"Hey!" the Tsukichage shouted, rising to his feet. "GET SOME MEDICS IN HERE!"

"Don't bother…" Zack said, watching his hand dissolve into blue glass fragments which crumbled into dust in the wind. "We're goners…"

* * *

The bald man in the trenchcoat rested against an alleyway in the city of the rain, panting for breath as he collapsed from reality.

"So, this is how this dream ends…" he sighed, water bouncing of his black glasses. "Must be fate…"

* * *

"Hey!" Chuck Norris shouted. "SEPHIROTH!"

"That's right…" Sephiroth choked, remembering the sensation of despair as he was erased from existence. "I am… just… a puppet…"

The cowboy stood up, gripping the side of his hat. "Shit…"

* * *

Rock reached out to Revy, giving her a weak smile as he faded away.

Revy looked at him, then turned away. "Fuck…" she managed before vanishing.

* * *

"Well, this has been a load of fun mates." Jack Sparrow told his two companions with a raised bottle and a cheery smile. "Hopefully there'll be rum on the other side."

"True dat sucka." Mr. T nodded, downing his milk as his chest vanished.

"Farewell." Bruce Lee nodded as the two men were consumed by the real world.

* * *

"My friend, do you fly away now?" Genesis asked. "To a world that abhors you and I? All that awaits you is a sombre morrow, no matter where the winds may blow…"

"You're going as you lived." Angeal said as the blue light consumed his body. "Quoting that damned play."

Genesis laughed, the book slipping to the floor as his fingers vanished. "Infinite in mystery, is the gift of the goddess, we seek it thus, and take to the sky." He said, the light rising to his throat. "Ripples form on the water's surface, the wandering soul knows…"

"No rest..." Angeal finished for him with his final breath.

* * *

"Well now." Tsunade grinned as Auron vanished. "Looks like the imaginary king just lost his fictional army."

* * *

Minato Arisato's eyes widened as Clare the Claymore was erased before his very eyes.

It took him a while to comprehend what had just happened, but then he laughed.

He laughed hard, and he laughed at the sheer absurdity of it all.

"KAMIGAKURE!" he shouted to the world, arms spread wide. "POPULATION: THREE!"

* * *

**-}+{-**

So… who saw that coming?


End file.
